Alphz Posted October 1, 2007 Share Posted October 1, 2007 As another armoured figure slumped to the blood soaked dirt, his body riddled by imperial fire Halius took a moment to assess 'his' carnage ... Halius and his chosen had carved a bloody path into the loyal astartes, their white armour soaked in praise to Khorne. Leaving the main force far behind, Long had the campaign been and his world eater's numbers dwindled. "Lord Halius, the right flank is withere... Blood for the Blo.." Static and gunfire cutting the message short, the truth all to pungent to the veteran of a thousand fields of battle, blood rage had led them to the maws of death, and for Khorne bezerkers of the World Eaters there was only one thing to do! "Blood for the blood god!" He roared as the loyalist's launched their counter attack. "Blood for the blood god!" His chosen recited as they charged the so called veterans of the foe. Blistering cover fire pulverized brother Farlix, his body becoming home to several projectiles of varying nature. Brother Rogerius taking a missle to his left leg, is left to crawl. This was to be short and bloody, just how it should be. Halius feels a pang of sadness that his imminent doom causes to future bloodletting ambitions. Traitor and loyalist meet, insane rage pitted against righteous hatred. Halius swings at the first marine, feinting and doubling past the marine's parry; the gifted axe of khorne striking home just under the rib cage, removing him of the burden of his lower body. From the left a chain sword is buried into Halius' thigh, without second thought he uses it as a pivot and beheads the offending owner. Halius' fury transcends, his axe guiding itself to anything living nearby, sometimes friend, sometimes foe, always death. Many a weapon penetrating his armour, but none his spirit. Mere moments pass before the sprawling mayhem that was the combat is still, at its epi-centre the Khorne Lord, the blood lust ebbing slightly, in a moment of clarity notes how few his followers number and stranger yet the lack of the expected cross fire directed in his direction. All around the loyal astartes' attention is elswhere, explosions and small arms harassing the previously entrenched troops from vulnerable angles. Many begin falling back. Somewhat bemused by this strange fortune, Halius quickly thanks the gods before thundering towards the nearest concentration of loyalists. "World Eaters, to me!" ------------------------------------------------------------------------- critiques would be much appreciated, I hope to write more stuff and want to nail down some technique Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wolf Lord Loki Posted October 1, 2007 Share Posted October 1, 2007 Not bad!! I quite liked it. You managed to gift your World Eater with a bit more than just blood lust, so that he's also aware of his suroundings in times when he isn't in combat. Do you have any plans to write some more stories with him in it? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alphz Posted October 1, 2007 Author Share Posted October 1, 2007 Much appreciated! I am indeed planning on such ventures, although i hope to write a much longer story which covers much more of the backround behind my new army (hopefully before i build too many!) and get some character develpoment going on. The short stories are more keeping the motivation up and improving my writing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hazardousZERO Posted March 6, 2010 Share Posted March 6, 2010 Like it looking forward too more. Love the WE especially pre-heresy but there current state isn't bad ether. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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