Hubernator Posted September 8, 2009 Share Posted September 8, 2009 His footsteps echoed through the hallowed halls. Storm Bolter raised in front of him, he took a look around the corridor. Both sides were clear. He nodded back to his sergeant, who gave the go-ahead. The rest of the Blood Angels Terminators fanned out around the corridor, sergeant in the middle with Brother Verrance leading the way. Librarian Caltor closed his eyes briefly before nodding his approval. Since this hulk had arrived everything had seemed to go wrong. First it crashed end first into the Blood Angels’ Battlebarge Angelic Might, and genestealers instantly flooded aboard; tearing and killing all in their path. It was only the might of the Terminators that had managed to horde the brood back into the Hulk, before it was sealed off from the rest of the great ship. It was then assigned to sergeant Marrick and his elite Marines to find the rest of this brood and eliminate if before any more casualties were taken. Or before something else happened… Verrance checked the next junction in the great Hulk ahead of him. No sign, all clear. He gave a nod back to the sergeant to give the all-clear, and the squad advanced. So far the kill count was twenty-three; six of which claimed by Verrance alone. The squad knew of at least fifty of these genestealers, and knew that thirteen of them had died while gorging themselves on the flesh of the Chapter Serfs as they broke into the hull of the Battlebarge. Now it seemed that there was at least fourteen left aboard the Space Hulk. Not anymore, thought Verrance as he advanced cautiously down another corridor. A scurrying sound echoed every so often through the walls – genestealers making their way through the air vents and various pipes that ran across the Hulk. Another cautious check; another all-clear signal from Verrance. This hunt was taking longer than hoped. A they travelled deeper into the Hulk, all lighting faded until the squad were left with lights attached to their armour and their keen night-vision to help them. Into one corridor they passed – one much narrower than the others. Clearly not meant for Terminators, Marrick pondered as he stopped. “It seems we cannot pass through here. We will have to turn back” he stated. “Brother, I fear going back would not be a wise solution…” questioned Verrance. “Indeed” The Librarian stood forward, hand raised. Using his psychic abilities, the walls buckled and expanded, creating a clear route through the now wide corridor. “Let us continue” smiled the Librarian gesturing the others to make the advance. Verrance merely shrugged and made his way forward, letting the others follow suit. Instantly there was a scurrying sound right above them, causing them all to pause and look up. “Wait…” The air vent above one of the Terminators burst open and 3 genestealers fell out, claws drawn and pointing at the nearest victim. Immediately the Terminator beneath them backed off into his Brothers while the rest of the squad trained their Storm Bolters on them and open fired. Purple blood splattered against the walls as the genestealers were shot where they stood; left as a messy pulp on the floor to rot away. Marrick scanned his men, before nodding and walking off ahead of the group. Three more down, still more to find, he thought. In a flash he disappeared from view, just as the rest of the squad had begun to follow him. Where he once was now lay a hole to the lower decks – a dark abyss to the very bottom of the Hulk. A stunned silence was shared by the squad. The Librarian though had seen enough and made his way over the hole. “Verrance, until we find the sergeant, you are acting command of this mission. Now get to it” he said, giving Verrance a stern look. Verrance nodded. “Follow me…” More to come Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/178020-into-the-darkness/ Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hubernator Posted September 11, 2009 Author Share Posted September 11, 2009 Verrance then turned to the nearest doorway and passed through; the squad following suit. Deeper and deeper they moved, occasionally checking routes and quizzing over ideal pathways to the bottom levels of the hulk. At one point the squad had paused as the Librarian had a troubled look on his normally steel face, but it subsided and they pressed on. Silence had fallen amongst them – mainly through the lack of leadership from a well-known sergeant. Verrance however wasted no time, even as it passed them by like they weren’t there. Verrance halted at a dead end. The walkway that crossed the large docking bay had been broken in two by something. Verrance gave the signal and two Terminators advanced to investigate. “Brother, it appears something from above feel down here” reported one. Verrance looked up, along with the others. Sure enough, there was a large jagged hole in the roof, and what seemed to be a few more above it… “Could it be…” Verrance edged to the broken end of the walkway and looked down. There was another hole, roughly the same shape as the ones above him. Whatever feel through had kept on going. Caltor smiled slightly. “Yes Verrance it could be the sergeant. But if he is to live we must get to him quickly” he muttered. Verrance noticed a lift and leapt onto it, motioning the others to follow. One at a time, they all leapt on and the lift was activated. Downwards they moved as the lift jerked into life and made the descent. Within minutes the squad had reached the bottom of the hanger. Verrance took another look down the hole. Only a few levels… but no body. As the others caught up to him, he leapt down the hole. Floors and lights flashed past his head at a great speed. Down and down he fell, it felt never-ending to him. Forever falling… he finally hit solid flooring. Though not so solid now since he had landed on it. Beneath his feet he could feel the floor creaking and bending under the new weight and the pressure he’d just exerted onto it. Staring up, he saw the faces of his comrades and the Librarian all staring back in some form of awe at the jump he just committed. Caltor shook his head and walked away from the hole; and the others followed. Now Verrance was alone. Looking around, he could see hardly anything, except himself and the small part of the corridor either side of him. He scanned the floor for any signs for movement – anything that could help him. A quick scan of the floor gave him the answer – a few scratch marks and a small blood trail leading in one direction. Seeing his new objective, he made his move… More on the way Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/178020-into-the-darkness/#findComment-2108208 Share on other sites More sharing options...
antique_nova Posted September 14, 2009 Share Posted September 14, 2009 good start for paragraph one and good ending for paragraph 2 and remember marines don't ever make there own jugdements of fear about themselves so your gonna have to sort out this line. “Brother, I fear going back would not be a wise solution…” questioned Verrance. The story needed to flow alot better and alot more needs to be explained, i can't give you a full scan and comment, because it will take time. and time is something that is against me here for the next couple of days. The 2nd paragraph didn't grip me to be honest, but i just read on abit anyway because i wanted to know what had happened to the sarge. however, carry on. thanks antique_nova Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/178020-into-the-darkness/#findComment-2111070 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hubernator Posted September 17, 2009 Author Share Posted September 17, 2009 Sorta meant to be a quick story this one in a random Space-Hulk-thought-spree. The second para is in some ways a filler but it does in some sense give an outline of how tedious this task the BA had. Lack of details would be intentional here. I don't know too much BA fluff nor do I want to use it. I mean I could expand but the need isn't really there IMHO. And that quote you picked out. That was him showing doubt rather than fear. Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/178020-into-the-darkness/#findComment-2115363 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hubernator Posted September 24, 2010 Author Share Posted September 24, 2010 Librarian Caltor shook his head. “This is not what we needed at this time” He grumbled. One of his Brothers rested a hand upon his shoulder. “We have no time to waste Brother Librarian, we must complete our objective” he stated firmly. “Yes, we must continue, despite this…” he took one last look down the hole “…setback. Onwards Brothers.” And with that he strode past the Terminators and back into the darkly lit corridors of the Hulk, the Terminators following in tow. Brother Verrance stalked the dark corridor he had landed in just moments ago, constantly aware of his situation and of any ambushes that could arise. What the Chapter knew of these Genestealers was that there were at least fifty alive. Whether there were more, that was uncertain. In such an event they had come equipped with remote charges and Heavy Flamers to tear apart the nests that would spawn more monstrosities. Verrance himself had one of the charges but was not gifted with the Heavy Flamer he would have been more grateful for in his circumstances. No matter, his favoured Storm Bolter had served him well so far, it will serve him more again. Checking his weapon, he made slow progress, following the thin and hardly traceable trail of blood running along the floor. At places he found scratch marks and bullet holes, a sign that indeed Sergeant Marrick was along this path, and that either him or a creature was wounded. His light could not reveal the colour, but follow it he must if was to find his Sergeant. Onwards he walked, avoiding creating a disturbance to the oddly quiet surroundings. Through twists and turns he followed the blood trail; through floodlit corridors and pith-black hallways. Occasionally he paused at the sound of scurrying and scratching sounds from above and around, only for them to end and him to continue. Soon he found he was making progress; the wounded being leaving the trail was leaving more stains and less bullet holes were appearing. The being is suffering more wounds that it can cope, he thought, hurrying his pace. His heavy suit of armour clanked against the metal floors as he paced himself, ever wary of the trail on the ground and storm bolter raised out for any encounter. Turning a corner he found the being, greeting him with a sense of joy and remorse. It had became apparent among the rest of the Terminators many floors above Verrance that the Librarian has sensed a great pain, and a greater disturbance. Unsure of questioning such a matter they pressed onwards in silence, guided by the Librarian’s commands. The odd encounter of Genestealers appeared in places, but generally it was quiet amongst the group. It was after a fair few corridors that Brother Antonio broke the silence. “Librarian, what was it you felt back there? You look troubled” he questioned, causing Caltor to stop along with the group. “I felt, a loss of a Brother…” he said quietly, considering his words it seemed. “Was there anything else Librarian?” Antonio pushed further. “There was… something far worse. We must hurry and find Brother Verrance, he is closest to our objective.” With that, he hurried onwards. Antonio like his Brothers were left confused for a moment but they shrugged such notions off and ran after the Librarian. Inside his mind Caltor was worrying more and more of their situation. The longer we wait, he thought, the longer we may be doomed. Verrance rushed across the corridor, gun blazing untold fury at the Genestealers he now saw before him, running across the walls and floor towards him. One after another the Genestealers fell, but as one fell another came to take his place. More and more he killed, more and more poured forth from the vents and from corridors beyond him. Through the mass he could make out his fellow Brother, Sergeant Marrick. Crying out his defiance at the beasts, he charged through the horde to his Brother, hefting the body over his shoulder and running along away from the screeching mass of Genestealers, firing shots behind as he ran. It was quickly made known he couldn’t outrun them as they drew closer and closer with each turn. Verrance scanned the walls, finding a sealed door with a lock. Activating the lock, he dashed inside and sealed the door, breaking the lock from being breached via the controls with his gun. Temporary safety now achieved, he turned his attention to his Sergeant. Scanning his body, he found many deep cuts in his armour, many of which leaking blood. One such wound was in his ribcage above one of his hearts – blood covering the hole and forming pools on the floor. Verrance bowed his head; his Brother was close to death with little means of saving his life. A cough broke the silence as Marrick lifted his head. “It is nice to see a fellow Brother again” he said, his voice getting weaker with each word. “Rest Brother, we will get aid for you” Verrance replied, scanning the room for any medical supplies “It will be too late for that. Sanguinus is waiting for me. My time has come.” Marrick muttered, taking a deep breath. “I understand Brother” Verrance took a look at his Sergeant once more, looking for any sign of recovering his Sergeant from death. But he saw none he could cure by himself; an Apothecary was required for his treatment, and in these dark infested corridors there was none. Verrance bowed his head, stricken with grief. “Brother Verrance” Marrick wheezed, “I give you full squad command. You must complete the mission. May our Primarch and the Emperor watch over you.” Verrance nodded as Marrick took his last breath before slumping against the wall he was laid against. Verrance stayed knelt by his side, mourning his Sergeant for what seemed like hours. He then took hold of the weapons his Sergeant had, strapped them to his armour and hefted the corpse on his shoulder once more. Marrick’s geneseed will not be left to rot, Verrance told himself. He would see this mission through, even if he had to complete it alone. Up Above Caltor and his fellow Brothers has managed to find a path down the Hulk’s many floors, deeper into the dark abyss of the Hulk. Once they had reached the level their Brothers were on, they could tell at least one still lived. Gunshots were heard far ahead, a brief echo but still ringing true in the empty halls. “With haste Brothers! Verrance must be in danger, we must support him!” cried Caltor, sprinting forward once more, Terminators in pursuit. Through dark halls and under the gaping hole that was left by Marrick they passed, and like Verrance they picked up on the trail of blood. When it became thickest, they heard much scurrying and screeching ahead. “Heavy Flamers at the ready Brothers “he ordered, nodding towards Antonio and another Terminator. Both pushed ahead, waiting at the edge of the intersection. The Librarian scanned ahead for them then nodded. “Fire.” With that command, both Brothers turned into the corridor and unleashed a great plume of flame upon the Genestealers. Screams of anguish and agony filled the Hulk as they were burnt alive to smouldering ashes; none withstood the purification that the Terminators had bestowed upon them. When the screeching died down the Terminators stopped, letting the others through to forward the advance. More appeared from the vents, and were met with the guns of the Terminators. Seemingly clear they now noticed the carnage wrought by not them but another. Following bullet holes and Genestealer bodies they encountered more of the beasts, which were purged on the spot. Around corridors and through intersections they marched, ever wary of more Genestealers, until they found an open door. Antonio stepped in first, observing the room. On the ground he found the bloodstains of a being. Caltor entered and saw the pool of blood, and immediately was struck with grief. “One of our Brothers is dead. The other must have found him and carried him away” he stated, head bowed. The other Terminators bowed heads too from the news; what remained was who was still alive, and where was he. Antonio and Caltor left the room, sealing the door. The search was not over yet… Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/178020-into-the-darkness/#findComment-2520594 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hubernator Posted October 5, 2010 Author Share Posted October 5, 2010 no insight at all? Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/178020-into-the-darkness/#findComment-2528864 Share on other sites More sharing options...
antique_nova Posted November 5, 2010 Share Posted November 5, 2010 not bad, carry on. Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/178020-into-the-darkness/#findComment-2554402 Share on other sites More sharing options...
calgar101 Posted November 5, 2010 Share Posted November 5, 2010 Just skimmed over it and will read it much more properly over this weekend, my only minor quibble is the lack of comma's. You should use them to extend your sentences, as a reader I get into my stride reading and then I see a full stop and that breaks my reading; like kangaroo petrol :) Other than that I love the concept and will read with eager anticipation. Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/178020-into-the-darkness/#findComment-2554405 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hubernator Posted November 5, 2010 Author Share Posted November 5, 2010 Hey look, comments :lol: Thanks guys, I'll add something when the moment arises. Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/178020-into-the-darkness/#findComment-2554452 Share on other sites More sharing options...
calgar101 Posted November 5, 2010 Share Posted November 5, 2010 Haha yes comments, those things that can be your world or bane of your existence for stories ;) I literally only skimmed it, not really reading too much as time and my mood is against me :lol: I can see that in the last section you did have more commas so it did flow much better. Once I've read it in much greater detail I'll(try) to comment and give you pointers but I am no expert either :) Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/178020-into-the-darkness/#findComment-2554471 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hubernator Posted November 5, 2010 Author Share Posted November 5, 2010 By all means take as much time as you need, I've got plenty ^_^ and I actually like comments on my stories which I barely get :P Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/178020-into-the-darkness/#findComment-2554621 Share on other sites More sharing options...
antique_nova Posted November 8, 2010 Share Posted November 8, 2010 ^_^ doesn't everyone Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/178020-into-the-darkness/#findComment-2556549 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Archived
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.