SH: Iron Warriors

[The 13th Goat]

WIP

The is an IA from the Sanguine Heresy

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Iron Warriors

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The Iron Giant

http://th00.deviantart.net/fs39/300W/i/2008/354/8/6/Perturabo_by_slaine69.jpg

When the Emperor Of Mankind arose supreme leader of humanity, he did what all mighty kings did; consolidated his power by bringing fourth heirs. Naturally no mere mortal could ever match the sheer perfection he embodied. So it was left to the Emperor to make 20 fine sons from his very essance, gifting each with his incredible genetic template. However, due the machinisations of others, his proud sons were snatched while still in infancy, and flung out amoungst the stars. Desperate to be reunited with his kin, the Emperor set out to reclaim his children, scouring the galaxy for his lost sons. One such son was the Iron Giant, Perturabo. Hurtling through the warp, he came to rest on the battered world of Olympia.

 

Olympia was a world blighted by war, with warlords rising from their cities to do battle of the worlds scant resources. Fine grey sand swirled around the lower valleys, prevented many crops from growing and making grazing of livestock almost impossable. The few oceans the world did have were polluted by the constant run-off of wrecked soil, and dark, dirty rain fell from the sky in an almost perpetual drizzle. The only good soil was high on the mountain ranges, and bitter wars developed around the prized commodity. It was in the ashen wastes of the lower valley's the Perturabo was first discovered by the scavaging slavers that roamed those dire plains. Traded into slavery at the city of Lochos, Perturabo was left alone and isolated in the kilometer deep water mines that supplied the city with its most guarded resource. Like many of the child slaves, he often wondered for days within the worlds bowels with meger rashions and a simple pick axe search for the illusive water veins that peppered the rocks.

 

Perturabo first came to the notice of Dammekos, the ruler of Lochos, when a terrorist attack from another city left the mines collapsed. For days the died were dragged from the earth, until one day, a huge man, covered in dust and badly bruised walked from the wreakage. Only a scant 4 years had passed since his arrival, but Perturabo's immense power was clear to all. Brought before the Dammekos, the middle aged ruler announced that Perturabo was to be adopted into his mighty family and help him seek vengence on those that dared cross Lochos. Within days the young Primarch was being schooled on tactics and combat, excelling in both. But his true mastery was to come with his command on technology. Olympia's long wars had eroded the understanding of technology as generations were forced into and endless struggle to survive. Long had passed the days of understanding how even the basic lasgun would work, with most technology falling into disrepair. But Perturabo had a natural talent for understanding such matters, and it wasn't long before the Primarch was educating others on how to build and use weapons. Dammekos immediatly saw his son as the perfect tool to enact his vengence. Within mere months Dammekos had with Perturabo's designs built hundreds of weapons, ranging from guns to tanks, in a slave enforced mass production. Then, with Perturabo at its head, the people of Lochos went to war.

 

Within a mere two years the entire planet had fallen to Dammekos, either under his propoganda of a united Olympia and better living conditions, or the guns of his enforcers. Cities were forced to pay tribute to Lochos and its mighty ruler, and soon the taxes that had been lifted from the people were out shadowed by the demands of gifts from the nobal houses of Lochos. All the while Perturabo remain quiet, silently working in his mighty forges. People began to cry out for salvation from the now Tyrant of Lochos, yet the ever distant ignored their pleas. After all, their place had been set, and there was little point in listening to those that were failing their duties. Over time, however, rebellions rumbled to the surface, and each time Perturabo was tasked to bring the cities back in check. Despite his warnings that garrisons were needed in those cities, Dammekos always demanded the armies return and consolidation on Lochos in order to constantly defend the Tyrant and his noble kinsmen.

 

Then one day, just outside Lochos, a great light peirced the stone grey sky. Gently coming to rest on the ashen ground, a great space ship hummed with immense power. Riding out with a battalion of men, Perturabo went forth to meet this stange craft, arriving just as the boarding ramp lower to the ground. Imerging in a halo of radiance, the Emperor strode out of his craft to meet his son. Recongnising him instantly as his true father, Perturabo suggested they retreat within the walls of the palace so they might discuss things in a more quiet enviroment. As the walked back, the Emperor recanted his tale of the Great Crusade and the unification of humanity, sharing his great goal all mankind. Upon reaching the great halls, however, Dammekos was far less impressd. Swollen with gluttoney and wearing robes of the finest silks, the Tyrant decanted the Emperor as a fraud, and his son an imbecil for listening to his lies. Spitting on the breast plate of the Emperor, Dammekos went to call the guards to execute them both. Perturabo's hand was faster than any bar the Emperor could see, and as Dammekos head rolled away with a shocked expression etched on his face, the rebellion of Olympia came to a quick finish.

 

The Iron Warriors Crusade

The astartes created from Perturabo's stock were of the same demenure of their quiet and brooding lord. Quickley establishing Olympia as their homeworld, the began mass recruitment drives amoungst the beaten population. Building his number to that of 18 000 marines, and fleet of great starships to carry them, Perturabo outfitted his force with weapons the likes he had only concived in his dreams. Gradually Perturabo and his Iron Warriors set off to assist the Emperor in his conquest of the galaxy, leaving behind a world bitter citizens and rebellious nobles.

 

During the early years of the crusade, Perturabo formed two very close relationships. The first was with the Adeptus Mechanicus, of whom Perturabo revered with facination. Visiting Mars many time during his early career, he and the Fabricator General Kelbor-Hal were said to have been of equal skill in their mastery of technology, often musing together over their great works. This closeness was reflected in the ranks of Iron Warrors, and often they were outfitted with the best equipment and vehicals. In return, often Mechanicus expeditions were watched over by Iron Warrior fleets.

 

The second closeness he felt was for his brother Dorn. Dorn had come the Emperor before Perturabo, and was partnered with the Iron Warriors for the early stages of the Great Crusade. As the two formed a bond in battle, Perturabo felt a kinship with his brother that until then he had never known. Together they conquered many worlds, often relaying on the Hammer And Seild Tactic they devised. The Iron Warriors would break open enemy formations while the Imperial Fists would rush in and form a defensive position. Once secure, the Iron Warriors would retreat to regroup while the Imperial Fists continued to inflict damage. Thousands of worlds have since fallen to this tactic in the aftermath of the Heresy, performed by both traitors and loyalists alike, such was its effectiveness.

 

As the Legions progressed and the Imperium expanded, soon the requirements of garrisoned astartes became apparent. Perturabo, keenly aware of the consequences of ignorance, offered many of his warriors over for this task, establishing the famous Iron Keeps through out the Imperium. However, while the Primarch himself found this to be exceptable, many within the Legion did not. Numerous Astartes saw the act as a waste of their abilities, and disillusionment soon set in for those left behind. Whilst those that were situated on forge worlds were granted the numbers to defend the world, some planets garrisoned saw as little as six astartes attending to the planet as advisors. Little could Perturabo have known that this spark of dissent would ultimatly prove his legions undoing.

 

The Heresy

By the time news of Sanguinius's trechery reached Perturabo, things had already begun to unravel. Spurrned on by Sanguinius's promise of freedom from the shackles of Imperial rule, many of the Iron Keeps had turned traitor wreaking bloody carnage on the worlds taht they had previously protected. Forges were looted for weapons, space ports bombed, administrative buildings collapsed all in the unforgiving release of the confined Iron Warriors aggression. Horrified that his own sons had turned, Perturabo immediattly turned back from his purging of the Ghoul Stars and began the long journey back to Terra. On the way, the Legion stopped many times to defeat Iron Keeps, saving worlds from further bloodshed by entering viscious bloody combat with their one time brothers.

 

Many questioned at the time why Perturabo stopped at only certain Iron Keeps, instead of heading straight to Terra and the Emperor. Some speculated that he was doing what he could for the people of the Imperium, while others suggested that his delays were to see who would win. In truth, a secret shame huanted the Primarch. For unbeknownst to all but the highest levels, the Iron Warriors and Mechanicus had been conducting experiments. Curosity and intrigue had lead the Primarch and the Mechanicus to experiment with a number of banned practices, examining their effects and judging their merits. From unsactified weapons, xeno technology and A.I fitted battle suits to gentic tampering with the Legions own stocks of gene seed had all been secretly performed under the guise of protection, even unknown to the Iron Warriors protecting them. Perturabo feared the revelation of such actions would surely see his Legion destroyed, if not for being traitors then for breaking Imperial law. Desperate to hide his secret, his legion moved disjointedly through the Imperium as it burned and destroyed all Iron Keeps that housed such experiments.

 

Eventually as the Traitor drew closer to Terra, Perturabo relinquished his quest to destroy the Keeps and made directly for Terra. However, the warp was predictably dissruptive and the Legion spent for them felt like months trapped in transit. Eventually they arrived in system just as the Traitors had begun blockade. Desperatly fighting through the mass of traitor ships, the Legion deployed on Mars before their ships retreated further out. Finding the once haven of technology smashed and ruined was said to bring bitter tears to the Primarch's eyes, yet pragmatic as ever he began the dutiful task of securing the sector. Within a week the Legion, know half its original strength, was engaged around the planet defending forges and smuggling weapons to the loyalists via mass teleporters designed and enhanced by the Legions of Tech Marines. Titans roamed the martian landscapes like wandering colossi, engaging in titanic battles that could last for days. Slowly but surely, the Iron Warriors were pushing the traitor's back.

 

Sanguinuis new to lose Mars was to commit a death sentance on his plans. Enraged that Mars had not been able to hold its own, the Winged Devil dispatched the one man he felt could defeat his iron brother; Rogal Dorn. By this point the Imperial Fist had undergone much changes. Viberant patterns dercorated their armour, with mutation slowly creeping throughout the chapter. They feel on Mars like wild beast, screaming inhumane noises while performing based and horriffic acts. A great meloncholy filled teh Legion as the they fought with ones they had once called brothers, but as the figting drew on they realized the the once nobal Imperial Fists were long dead.

 

Events came to a head at Mount Olympus Forge. Seat of the Fabricator General, Perturabo had travelled their personally to use the forges great machines to help win the conflict. What he found their disgusted him. Kelbor-Hal, his friend and the Fabricator General, lay dead at the feet of his brother Dorn. His brother, one proud and nobal, know stood fastooned with jewels, his armour a dirty bronze with streaks of purple pulsing through it. His dank, grey hair dangled limp over his face, and his eyes shone with an unusual green glow. Seeing how far his brother had fallen, Perturabo launched into an attack, while all around his Warriors battled what was once the first company veterens, now warriors who's white and black garbs now hung pink and obsideon with jewels dotting ther armour. As the battle raged inside the forge, the ground shoke as approaching titans trudged ever closer intent on reaping blood. Ordering the rest of his soliders back, Perturabo and his first company made a dash for the Fabricator Generals personal forge, luring Dorn inside with insults and challenges. As Dorn charged into the room, the rest of the forge collapsed around them as the Titans cannons pounded the structure to dust.

 

What happened next is unknown. A great light was said to burst from the forge and blind anyone near, leaving the forge utterly destroyed and a crater where it once stood. Inside this great hole lay the prone form of Rogal Dorn, impailed with girders and unconcoius. Despite furious efforts by the Iron Warriors that had survived, the remaining Imperial Fists recovered their Primarch and retreated from Mars to the Warp. Broken and distrught over the loss of their beloved Primarch, consolidated to continue the efforts for Mars. However, by the time the legion had massed, Sanguinius was defeated and the Traitors had gone into retreat.

 

Olympia & the Scouring

[The emperors chosen]

Overall really good, there a a few spelling mistakes that kind of detract from the reading ,but still, aside from those ,it was well written.

[The 13th Goat]

Doing this while on a training coarse away from my main PC, which has Word for the spelling. Thanks for the comments though <_<

[Piousservant]

Personally, I have to say I'm not enamoured with what you've written. I should say that I don't have a problem with an "alternate history" Heresy, but there should be a degree of consistency with the existing background. You've called the Primarch of the Iron Warriors "Perturabo" but really all that he seems to have in common with the existing Perturabo is the name, you've written him as a completely different character and discarded . Which, to me, isn't a very satisfying "alternative" since it doesn't really explore the potential twists in the background that could have occured differently it just rides roughshod over the whole lot. The idea that Perturabo was ok with garrisoning up his Legion but that his marines were not... And that they turned rebel without him... It doesn't sound that plausible or make much sense as written. Though it is an alternative version of events there should still be a degree of logical consistency with the "real" characters, if that makes sense.

 

Just my two pennies worth...

[Ubermensch Commander]

Personally, I have to say I'm not enamoured with what you've written. I should say that I don't have a problem with an "alternate history" Heresy, but there should be a degree of consistency with the existing background. You've called the Primarch of the Iron Warriors "Perturabo" but really all that he seems to have in common with the existing Perturabo is the name, you've written him as a completely different character and discarded . Which, to me, isn't a very satisfying "alternative" since it doesn't really explore the potential twists in the background that could have occured differently it just rides roughshod over the whole lot. The idea that Perturabo was ok with garrisoning up his Legion but that his marines were not... And that they turned rebel without him... It doesn't sound that plausible or make much sense as written. Though it is an alternative version of events there should still be a degree of logical consistency with the "real" characters, if that makes sense.

 

Just my two pennies worth...

 

I'd have to agree, more or less, with Piousservant's assessment. Other than requiring an editor, this alternate heresy does not make much sense.

Why did Olympia follow Perturabo if he was the one who kept beating them down? With that little amount of spirit, wouldn't they make terrible Astartes? Perhaps if he had become the "Savior of Olympia" we could see a dramatic shift in temperament from the original Iron Warriors Primarch, giving a reason why in this time line he stuck with the Big E.

He is best buddies with Dorn, and then BAM Daemon Dorn! Grrr....arrggh scary! Kind of a raised eyebrow "huh"? moment there.

If you do want to include elements of the Iron Warriors going rebel PLAY IT UP MORE. If it wasn't a secret event, which it sounds like it was widespread, make the repercussions more drastic. Whether or not you have the "secret experiments" as public knowledge here we have elements of a nominally "loyalist" Legion up and going renegade. With kind of division within the ranks, it brings the entire Legions character in question. Now you somewhat touch on that in the one line "Many questioned at the time why Perturabo stopped at only certain Iron Keeps, instead of heading straight to Terra and the Emperor. Some speculated that he was doing what he could for the people of the Imperium, while others suggested that his delays were to see who would win." but then ends. Seems disingenuous somehow. Shouldn't the ramifications be longer lasting? ya know, "The actions of the traitor Iron Warriors casting a pall upon the Loyalists deeds for centuries to come etc etc" with the potential for a seminal redeeming event later on down the line if you decided to take it that way.

 

Recommend revisions or perhaps let more SH heresy articles come first, such a Imp Fist one, that would put some of the events into a broader context.

[The 13th Goat]

Well all i can say is thank God. I was worried i wasn't gonna get any real crit unless i started PMing people!

 

Ok, multi response so bare with me:

 

I should say that I don't have a problem with an "alternate history" Heresy, but there should be a degree of consistency with the existing background. You've called the Primarch of the Iron Warriors "Perturabo" but really all that he seems to have in common with the existing Perturabo is the name, you've written him as a completely different character and discarded.

 

True. I do feel with this finding the common character association with the original is important here, and i do need to go back and rework his earlier life. Namely by establishing the darker, more brooding figure, although the lack of current first hand accounts of his demenour are a hinderance.

 

The idea that Perturabo was ok with garrisoning up his Legion but that his marines were not... And that they turned rebel without him... It doesn't sound that plausible or make much sense as written. Though it is an alternative version of events there should still be a degree of logical consistency with the "real" characters, if that makes sense.

 

It does, but their has to be a point where the character has to be tweaked. While many believed he hated garrisoning, keep in mind he never openly refused or defied the action. By taming the idea that he despised garrisons i did manage to generate both links with the Iron Keeps falling and the sense of unease within the chapter. It also allowed me to introduce the concept that some of the Loyalist Legion's did see rebellion, and allowed me at least some flesh for future reconstruction. But i do agree these bits need fleshed out and hopefully it will be less jarring to the reader.

 

 

I'd have to agree, more or less, with Piousservant's assessment. Other than requiring an editor, this alternate heresy does not make much sense.

Why did Olympia follow Perturabo if he was the one who kept beating them down? With that little amount of spirit, wouldn't they make terrible Astartes? Perhaps if he had become the "Savior of Olympia" we could see a dramatic shift in temperament from the original Iron Warriors Primarch, giving a reason why in this time line he stuck with the Big E.

 

A very good idea, and one of two options i am currently exploring.

 

He is best buddies with Dorn, and then BAM Daemon Dorn! Grrr....arrggh scary! Kind of a raised eyebrow "huh"? moment there.

 

Naturally as this is an ongoing series of IA, Dorn's fall would only be losely mentioned here. Shocking, yes. But in the context of the series its not actually the focus. Deamon Dorn will be explained, either by me or the Sanguin Heresy creator Arenis.

 

If you do want to include elements of the Iron Warriors going rebel PLAY IT UP MORE. If it wasn't a secret event, which it sounds like it was widespread, make the repercussions more drastic. Whether or not you have the "secret experiments" as public knowledge here we have elements of a nominally "loyalist" Legion up and going renegade. With kind of division within the ranks, it brings the entire Legions character in question.

 

Definatly. It will be commented on during and be a major factor post heresy.

 

Now you somewhat touch on that in the one line "Many questioned at the time why Perturabo stopped at only certain Iron Keeps, instead of heading straight to Terra and the Emperor. Some speculated that he was doing what he could for the people of the Imperium, while others suggested that his delays were to see who would win." but then ends. Seems disingenuous somehow. Shouldn't the ramifications be longer lasting? ya know, "The actions of the traitor Iron Warriors casting a pall upon the Loyalists deeds for centuries to come etc etc" with the potential for a seminal redeeming event later on down the line if you decided to take it that way.

 

In most cases this IA is being written straight from my head as brain stream. I do need to go back and flesh that out, but i was concerned it drifted close to the Dark Angels story, and i didn't want to tie it to closely to that.

 

Recommend revisions or perhaps let more SH heresy articles come first, such a Imp Fist one, that would put some of the events into a broader context.

 

Being that I am the first to fire this up, i do see the logic in waiting for other articles. However, as I think the Intro, Russ and Sang are on the cards, i don't see Dorn being tackled soon. As i only have been given Iron Warriors and Death Guard, i don't feel free to tackle these Legions. Unless i ask Arenis for more work.. ^_^

 

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Great crit. So far progress will stop as i rework and expand on the current crit. Please keep it coming!

[Dark Apostle Thirst]

You say this is an IA. Shouldn't it be an IL?