Walter Payton Posted February 9, 2010 Share Posted February 9, 2010 Basic ideas -3rd Founding Chapter, formerly called the Star Brethren -Turned during routine warp jump, no-one knows why -Go to Eye, find a daemonic library about Death Guard, adopt their tactics -Become loyal to Horus, as such they hate BL -First master assimilated many warbands -Inevitably, they get on wrong side of big Abby, exiled (read, forced out) of Eye -Specialises in piracy and terror operations -Undivided Origins- Star Brethren set out from their homeworld of (insert name), to assist Battlefield Kar Duniash. When they arrive, their ships immediately fire upon the Battlefleet, crippling several capital ships, and then fleeing, taking several powerful fleet ships with them. They retreat to the eye, where they discover the Daemonic Library of Khaa'el'khazaar, a Lord of Change tasked by Tzeentch to record scraps of data about Nurgle (know thy foe and all that). Read about DG, and adopt their tactics, but not their worship. Ruled over by the Terror Council, which consists of the current chapter master, Elihael (formerly Epistolary Sejanus of the Ultramarines), the heads of the techpriests, sorceres, apothecaries et cetera, as well as the heads of the factions that worship a specific god. Organisation-The Shadow Brethren number almost 8000 marines, from recruitment, the original men, and the new members who joined them post turning. Over time they have come to view the Warmaster Horus as a visionary, and refuse to fight for Ezekyle Abbadon, seeing him as a pretender. Combat Doctrine-Shock and Awe, blood sacrifice, and the raising of huge temples to the Dark Gods. Often use piracy to spread rumour of their atrocity. Beliefs- Worship the Chaos Gods as part of a single, malign intelligence. Individuals may dedicate themselves to a certain facet of said intelligence, but most stay with Undivided. Attempting to ressurect Horus, hero worship him almost as fifth god. Battle-Cry: Shadows and dust! or simply Lupercal! Well, there it is. As my old dad says, good or hopeless? Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/192137-index-traitoris-the-shadow-brethren/ Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ferrata Posted February 9, 2010 Share Posted February 9, 2010 To be honest, I dislike the storyline about being separated from the Legion to become different. Personally, I would suggest a very early founding chapter that has fallen to Chaos after coming into contact some lost Death Guard library. This would allow them to become like the Death Guard but not Nurgle - and depending on how the books were written, it could explain why the see Horus as an inspired leader and Abaddon as a fake. Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/192137-index-traitoris-the-shadow-brethren/#findComment-2280542 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Walter Payton Posted February 9, 2010 Author Share Posted February 9, 2010 To be honest, I dislike the storyline about being separated from the Legion to become different. Personally, I would suggest a very early founding chapter that has fallen to Chaos after coming into contact some lost Death Guard library. This would allow them to become like the Death Guard but not Nurgle - and depending on how the books were written, it could explain why the see Horus as an inspired leader and Abaddon as a fake. Brillant! Thanks Ferrata, that will change it a wee bit. Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/192137-index-traitoris-the-shadow-brethren/#findComment-2280580 Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Nephilim Posted February 9, 2010 Share Posted February 9, 2010 I like your initial concepts. I thought about numbering the Nephilim around that, but I didn't know if it was too pretentious to do such a thing. Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/192137-index-traitoris-the-shadow-brethren/#findComment-2280686 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Leebe Posted February 9, 2010 Share Posted February 9, 2010 If they adopted Death Guard tactics but not worship, wouldn't they be foot sloggers rather than shock and awe specialists? Night Lords were more known for terror, while the Death Guard were about mass infantry and the versatility of the marine. Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/192137-index-traitoris-the-shadow-brethren/#findComment-2280771 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hasdrubal Posted February 10, 2010 Share Posted February 10, 2010 Basic ideas -3rd Founding Chapter, formerly called the Star Brethren -Turned during routine warp jump, no-one knows why -Go to Eye, find a daemonic library about Death Guard, adopt their tactics -Become loyal to Horus, as such they hate BL -First master assimilated many warbands -Inevitably, they get on wrong side of big Abby, exiled (read, forced out) of Eye -Specialises in piracy and terror operations -Undivided Origins- Star Brethren set out from their homeworld of (insert name), to assist Battlefield Kar Duniash. When they arrive, their ships immediately fire upon the Battlefleet, crippling several capital ships, and then fleeing, taking several powerful fleet ships with them. They retreat to the eye, where they discover the Daemonic Library of Khaa'el'khazaar, a Lord of Change tasked by Tzeentch to record scraps of data about Nurgle (know thy foe and all that). Read about DG, and adopt their tactics, but not their worship. Ruled over by the Terror Council, which consists of the current chapter master, Elihael (formerly Epistolary Sejanus of the Ultramarines), the heads of the techpriests, sorceres, apothecaries et cetera, as well as the heads of the factions that worship a specific god. Organisation-The Shadow Brethren number almost 8000 marines, from recruitment, the original men, and the new members who joined them post turning. Over time they have come to view the Warmaster Horus as a visionary, and refuse to fight for Ezekyle Abbadon, seeing him as a pretender. Combat Doctrine-Shock and Awe, blood sacrifice, and the raising of huge temples to the Dark Gods. Often use piracy to spread rumour of their atrocity. Beliefs- Worship the Chaos Gods as part of a single, malign intelligence. Individuals may dedicate themselves to a certain facet of said intelligence, but most stay with Undivided. Attempting to ressurect Horus, hero worship him almost as fifth god. Battle-Cry: Shadows and dust! or simply Lupercal! Well, there it is. As my old dad says, good or hopeless? Taking into account these are your initial ideas, I'll be more about giving you clues or punchlines to develop the background than really commenting on your bullet points. What was your chapter before turning traitor? A few lines will help us understand their changes since that event. It will help explaining as well their conversion to Death Guard tactics, because I am not sold to the book-reading conversion unless it has been infused with very powerful magic. Did they have a similar reliance on infantry and foot-slogging when part of the (false) Emperor's Finest? All in all, it reads like your Warband has Night Lords (terror tactics) and Word Bearers (worship, temple raising, etc.) inspirations. Maybe they assimilated some of these early on? Hum, I see Epistoalry Sejanus crossing the fine line between knowledge and corruption after devoting too much time to the gathering of Word Bearer lore, turning renegade then joigning the Shadow Brethen. What is the defining element that unite your warband, knowing that they worhsip different gods? They were all defeated and swore allegiance to the Shadow Brethen warlord, what make them stay true to their lord? I picture warbands as a very fluid mess, with marines leaving when they want to be in control of their own destiny, or when having an opportunity for advancement. Abbadon was ... hot-tempered as a loyalist, and surely got worse ever since the Heresy. Why did he leave the Shadow Brethen run for their lifes instead of making an example of them? How would the BL react to an encounter with the Shadow Brethen? Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/192137-index-traitoris-the-shadow-brethren/#findComment-2281506 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Captain Juan Juarez Posted February 10, 2010 Share Posted February 10, 2010 My first thought is "no one knows why" is considered one of those 'no-no's' in IA construction. Speculation without giving a concrete reason would be better. Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/192137-index-traitoris-the-shadow-brethren/#findComment-2281766 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ferrata Posted February 10, 2010 Share Posted February 10, 2010 To be honest, I think you have it the wrong way around. You've written the critique of the film before watching the film - let them do it the natural way. Let them find the book when they are loyal and let them come to their own conclusions that allow them to turn from The Emperor - let them embrace Chaos. Don't have them exiled from the Eye, it isn't need - have them leave because they think Abaddon is a traitor to traitors - turning from Horus like he did. Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/192137-index-traitoris-the-shadow-brethren/#findComment-2281796 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Walter Payton Posted February 10, 2010 Author Share Posted February 10, 2010 Fair words. Will go back and change later. Am going to start the IT tonight at home. Great stuff guys! Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/192137-index-traitoris-the-shadow-brethren/#findComment-2281857 Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Nephilim Posted February 10, 2010 Share Posted February 10, 2010 Awesome. I can't wait to see the fleshed out ideas. Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/192137-index-traitoris-the-shadow-brethren/#findComment-2281869 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Walter Payton Posted February 10, 2010 Author Share Posted February 10, 2010 Cheers Neph Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/192137-index-traitoris-the-shadow-brethren/#findComment-2281901 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Archived
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.