Hellbenders chapter IA project

[stilettoblade]

After taking the advice to write things down and start an outline, I found that some things that I was sticking on rather fell into place on paper. I dropped some of the initial ideas and changed some things, and this is what I have now. I'll update it as I go, and would welcome comments/suggestions/etc...

Hellbenders

Origins

The Hellbenders were founded in M37 (22nd Founding) to secure the region rimward of the thriving Sabbat Worlds, and specifically to attempt to pacify the Sanguinary Worlds before the Chaos presence there destabilized the new Imperial presence. The founding was plagued by difficulties, including a higher than anticipated proportion of failed recruits and a shortage of initial valid geneseed. As a result of this and continual combat with Chaos forces approaching or fleeing the Sabbat Worlds, the chapter has yet to ever reach full Codex strength, and the Hellbenders feel the need to prove themselves worthy, as their rough start made them unable to prevent the region from falling out of Imperial control in mid M41, leading to the Sabbat Worlds Crusade.

Later History

Sidebar event (relates to my other armies)

Recently, elements of the Hellbenders chapter fought alongside Inquisitor Schain of the Ordo Hereticus and the Sororitas of the Preceptory of the Scarlet Petal at the fall of the nearby forgeworld of Kandiis IV. The Hellbenders are presently accompanying the Inquisitor in tracking down the Chaos fleet that attacked the system, as he believes that several engines may have been captured from the Titan foundries.

Home World

The surface of Sauk, the main world of the Ozar system and homeworld of the Hellbenders, appears to be a pleasing agri-world of flowing grain fields, and indeed much of its export is foodstuffs grown in artificially irrigated fields where the natural water table is deep below the surface. In areas where the water table is nearer the surface, however, there is no cultivation of the land, and the inhabitants will avoid the area. Sauk is home to a subterranean apex predator the natives call the hellbender, from which the Marines took their name. The hellbender is a burrowing, salamandrine beast the size of a cargo hauler that can easily swallow a man whole. It is only able to live below the water table, though, as it requires plenty of moisture in the soil. It burrows to the surface to feed, but in general, the deeper the water table lies below the surface, the less likely one is to encounter a hellbender. As a consequence, the more favorable a year is for growing crops, the more restricted the safe land becomes. Conversely, in drier years, more land is available for cultivation and harvests are larger. A farming life does not an ideal space marine candidate make, however, and there is another population on the planet which attracted the notice of the space marines.

In the equatorial regions, where rainfall is higher, no attempts at cultivation of the land are attempted. The hellbenders reach even greater size here than in other parts of the world, due to easy access to the surface and plentiful prey in the jungles. A hardy few of the population make a living in the equatorial jungles, as the richest metal ores remaining on the planet are found there. These miners must be alert for attack at all times, and prepared to fight off the tremendous beast if one should attack. In close quarters, the hellbender is a ferocious opponent, with slashing claws, a mouth big enough to swallow several men whole, and venomous saliva that burns like fire on skin, not to mention its tremendous bulk flailing around. These miners are tough folk, and make excellent recruit stock for the Hellbenders space marines.

Beliefs

Minimally modified Promethean cult, probably. I'll figure this out later.

Combat Doctrine

The Hellbenders, like the Salamanders whose geneseed they carry, prefer short-range firefights, taking the battle to the enemy. However, due to their low numbers, they realize that it is often necessary for some elements to cover their brothers' advance in order to make an assault successful. The chapter possesses the standard allotment of vehicles for a full 1000 marines, and as they have never reached much above half strength, they have arranged their excess vehicles into a heavily mechanized 6th company which often fields armour to support the veteran and battle companies. Among the vehicles in the 6th company, there are many that have been traded from other Chapters for excess transports or retrofitted with heavier weapons, as the Hellbenders are well aware that fire support can help offset their limited numbers.

Organisation

To the extent that their numbers permit, the Hellbenders follow their parent chapter's Codex variances for the most part. The Hellbenders are currently (at least nominally) arranged into 7 companies of 12 squads (the 4th and 5th (reserve) are presently unused due to low numbers). The first company Devil Dogs fields veteran squads and terminators, 2nd company is a standard Salamanders-style battle company, 3rd company is as 2nd, but currently approx. half strength, 6th company is fully mechanized and 7th company is scouts (approx. half strength).

Gene-seed

Salamanders gene-seed, limited supply actually delivered for founding, hence limited initial numbers and slow ramp to combat effective strength

Battle-cry

Color Scheme

These colors (Macharius Solar Orange and Goblin Green) were chosen because the purpose of this army is to provide a bright contrast to my Inquisition/Adepta Sororitas/Grey Knights (lots of scab red, shadow grey, boltgun metal, etc...), and because they're similar to the colors of the chapter's namesake, the Hellbender salamander. I don't love this scheme, but I think it's close to what I'm after.

[Ecritter]

Color scheme looks good, never seen anyone else using anything like it.

 

I'd like to hear more of your concept before really giving any advice though.

[Octavulg]

It looks a little...poo-ey...

 

As to effects, the Space Sharks IA kicking around the forum somewhere gives a good example of some possible effects. But, really, it's far simpler to just ask - what do you think would happen?

[Ace Debonair]

It looks a little...poo-ey...

What a very curious diet you must have. :lol:

Sorry, I couldn't resist that.

 

Green and brown is a fine colour scheme to have, although I think I'd reccomend something a little darker.

How leaving the homeworld will effect your chapter depends rather on what your chapter was like before it left the homeworld.

 

Were they distant observers, sitting atop the high mountains and waiting for aspirants to reach them?

Were they fully immersed in the world and it's culture, and did they keep major factions from warring with each other?

Did they recruit from anywhere other than the homeworld anyway?

 

There's hundreds of effects it could have - and these are only a few of the questions you could ask. :lol:

Like Octavulg says, what effect do you think it would have on your chapter?

[Octavulg]

It's the brown more than the green.

 

And that's about enough on that topic, I think. :lol:

[stilettoblade]

My little patch of space is located rimward of the Sabbat Worlds, near the fringe of the Perseus arm. My existing force is a SoB army from a small satellite convent, the Preceptory of the Scarlet Petal, whose chapel was destroyed by a splinter Chaos fleet which fled the Sabbat Worlds when most of the tribes united in the events prior to the Crusade being launched. I'd like to place my Marines in the same region of space, since they'll field together in battles I play large enough that I need reinforcements for my Inq forces.

 

Actually, after writing that, I think it sounds really redundant to destroy multiple strongholds. Perhaps, rather than their numbers being shattered in the loss of their world, the chapter has never reached full strength due to recurring incidents with Chaos forces from the Sabbat Worlds region since their founding (26th, sent there to attempt to stabilize the region/support the impending Crusade).

 

On the color scheme, I see where you get that, Octavulg. It does look "poo-ey" on my work computer, now that I look at it, and I'm pretty certain it would look *awful* on a mini if I used the recommended colors from the painter (Iyanden Darksun and Goblin Green) but on my home monitor, at least, they display as a burnt orange and a dusty green, which is what I intended.

[Octavulg]

Your home monitor may need a little help. ;)

 

I'm not sure that I'm a fan of orange and green, either, but they're your miniatures. Of course, they're also my eyes. :)

[Chapter Master Ignis Domus]

The marines look a tad nurgley. I might find a less...interesting...color scheme. Maybe use more brighter contrasting colors.

[stilettoblade]

Updated with partial outline and less poo-ey, more contrasty color scheme.

[Chapter Master Ignis Domus]

Depending on when your chapter is founded, they probably would be up to strength by now, even with the low recruit numbers. There is an official GW chapter that I don't know the name of who have a low recruit success rate, and their still up to full strength. I do not recommend at all having a half chapter.

 

I do like the color scheme much better, though.

[stilettoblade]

They were just formed in the twenty-sixth founding, and have maintained their numbers from their rough start, but haven't been able to increase to full strength due to a full scale crusade erupting in their sector shortly thereafter. I got some more notes typed up and added some content to the history and homeworld sections.

[Chapter Master Ignis Domus]

The homeworld looks good. I still don't think they would have been stuck at the same number of marines.

[Bjorn Firewalker]

I think you're off to a good start. "Benders" is a strange name for a predator, however. (I found the namesake on Wikipedia, so I get your intentions, but the name keeps reminding me of the Futurama character.)

[Brother Argent]

Okay so let me first just say hi and welcome to Liber. Now many people seem to have not remembered I exist of recent or, more to the point, I haven't really been around as much as I should have of recent so I'm now going to terrorise everyone here in Liber so everyone fears my name, or something. You, stillettoblade, are the lucky first so, here goes:

 

Origins

The Hellbenders were founded in the 26th Founding to secure the region rimward of the Sabbat Worlds, and specifically to attempt to pacify the Sanguinary Worlds. The founding was plagued by difficulties, including a higher than normal proportion of failed recruits and a shortage of initial geneseed. As a result of this and continual combat with Chaos forces approaching or fleeing the Sabbat Worlds, the chapter has yet to ever reach full Codex strength

 

So firstly why are the Sanguinary Worlds important enough to warrant an entire space marine chapter to safeguard them? Bearing in mind that there are only a thousand space marine Chapters at any one time and there are over a billion worlds in the Imperium. I'm not saying that having them guard a particular region is a bad thing, its actually a good way to give your Chapter a purpose early in life but there needs to be a reason as to why this region deserved Adeptus Astartes protection and not, say, a few hundred thousand guardsmen.

 

Secondly why do they have failed recruits and a shortage of geneseed? This could be an interesting characteristic of your Chapter if developed well. Being from Salamander geneseed their geneseed should be fairly stable. Why isn't it? This idea has great potential. I've always wanted to see a Chapter whose whole theme is failing geneseed and how theydeal with it, but anyway.

 

Under Codex strength = good. Of course there is a debate over whether new Chapters are at full strength or whether, like I beleive, they are made to about a company or two strength and then built up as they go. There might be some issues with dealing with constant Chaos attacks as most Chaos guys aer pretty tough, even compared to space marines. An under strength struggling newly fledged Chapter isn't going to hold out against Chaos forces for long. Of course if they have some help they might do better. And poerhaps the reason they are there ties in with the reason Chaos keep knocking on the door.

 

Later History

Recently, elements of the Hellbenders chapter fought alongside Inquisitor Schain and the Sororitas of the Preceptory of the Scarlet Petal at the fall of the forgeworld of Kandiis IV. The Hellbenders are presently accompanying the Inquisitor in tracking down the Chaos fleet that attacked the system, as he believes that several war engines may have been captured from the Titan foundries.

 

What does this add? Not meaning to be unkind here but at the moment I'm unsure what this is meant to achieve other then tying your other armies into this article. Perhaps when you develop this into a full article this sort of information could be a nifty side bar, something along the lines of 'Vengeance for Kandis IV' or somesuch. As it stands now I'm not sure if it really adds anything useful.

 

Home World

 

Okay this section has potential as well. I just feel that perhaps the 'Hellbender' is a very unusual creature. I like the fact that it only can dwel in areas where there is high soil moisture content but is that s the case, how does it ever attack anyone? I assume it can survive ouside its normal habitat for a limited time. All in all I'm not sure how successful an agri world this would be if you can only harvest/farm some areas some of the time. Why hasn't the Imperium either given up on farming on the world or just killed the Hellbenders off? And for that matter why is it the areas where the water table is the highest that the minerals are? Unless they are some sort of water reliant mineral then wouldn't they be in the planets mountainous areas, higher and thus further from the water table? Your homeworld section really has potential but I feel you need to work on the why a little more.

 

Combat Doctrine

The Hellbenders, like the Salamanders whose geneseed they carry, prefer short-range and melee combat, taking the fight to the enemy. However, due to their low numbers, they realize that it is often necessary for some elements to cover their brothers' advance in order to make a successful assault. The chapter possesses the standard allotment of vehicles for a full 1000 marines, and as they have never reached much above half strength, they have arranged their excess vehicles into a heavily mechanized 5th company which often fields armour to support the veteran and battle companies.

 

I personally thought, due to slow reflexces, the Salamanders were more about short and long range fire fighting, with smashing the enemy apart with weapons that require strength not speed as a last resort. Things like Thunder Hammers and Power Fists. For a slose range fire fight and then stabbing you in the face Chapter your probably more looking at Imperial Fists or possibly even Raven Guard. Of course geneseed doesn't effect tactics, other then White Scars whom are more savage due to their geneseed.

 

As a seperate point why does having the vehicles for a full strength Chapter mean that an understrength Chapter will have a more mechanised approach? A standard Chapter has enough vehicles for every squad to have a transport or two, with the armoury possesing more as well as the Chapter's Predators, Whirlwinds etc. As I believe each marine can only ride in one vehicle at a time, I'm not sure how having more vehicles could make a Chapter more mechanised. Unless the combat quads each man up a vehicle. That might work I suppose.

 

Organisation

To the extent that their numbers permit, the Hellbenders follow their parent chapter's Codex variances for the most part. The Hellbenders are currently arranged into 5 companies of up to 12 squads (the 4th (reserve) is presently unused due to low numbers). The first company Devil Dogs fields veteran squads and terminators, 2nd company is a battle company, 3rd company is a battle company (currently approx. half strength), 5th company is mechanized and 6th company is scouts (approx. half strength).

 

Good. Expand further as you develop the article more. Only problems mentioned earlier. That and I might suggest a larger then normal scout company, due to the increased attrition rate there going to try to recruit as many peeps as they can.

 

Gene-seed

Salamanders gene-seed, limited supply for founding, hence limited initial numbers and slow ramp to combat effective strength

 

Here is where you should be expanding on why their geneseed has failed as mentioned earlier and such things. Its good to see a Salamander Successor arounds as we dont see many, with good reason. If I remember correctly there is something about Salamanders that lowers their recruitment rate anyway, although I'm no sure.

 

Battle-cry

 

These colors (Macharius Solar Orange and Goblin Green) were chosen because the purpose of this army is to provide a brigth contrast to my Inquisition/Adepta Sororitas/Grey Knights (lots of scab red, shadow grey, boltgun metal, etc...), and because they're similar to the colors of the chapter's namesake, the Hellbender salamander. I don't love the scheme, but I think it's close to what I'm after.

 

If this is there battle cry its fairly odd. ;) That said I like this if it is there colour scheme. Perhaps a richer green might work but other then that its good.

 

 

 

I apologise if I may have come off overly critical here but I'm on a warpath now so everyone going to be getting it. All in all I think your Chapter shows alot of promise. I feel your main issue is what I call the "Y Syndrome". Thats just a cute way of saying your articles needs more WHY things happen. Your getting the Who, What Where and When going but missing the most critical element. The Why element helps to suspend belief and all in all make your article more enjoyable and helps it bond together better. Good luck with it and I think that these guys show some real potential.

 

That said I don't personally like the name the 'Hellbender' for either the Chapter or the animal. Doesn't really have the punch a Chapter name should and makes me think of dodgy Avatar cartoons. I suggest okeeping it for now but as you develop your Chapter further looking at punchier more sexy alternatives.

[NightrawenII]

Okay so let me first just say hi and welcome to Liber. Now many people seem to have not remembered I exist of recent or, more to the point, I haven't really been around as much as I should have of recent so I'm now going to terrorise everyone here in Liber so everyone fears my name, or something.

Well, you are not the only one, who adopted such policy. So in turn, I'm going to terrorize you (and others), until my nickname appears on the list of infamous members or something. :D

 

*cough*

 

Under Codex strength = good. Of course there is a debate over whether new Chapters are at full strength or whether, like I beleive, they are made to about a company or two strength and then built up as they go. There might be some issues with dealing with constant Chaos attacks as most Chaos guys are pretty tough, even compared to space marines. An under strength struggling newly fledged Chapter isn't going to hold out against Chaos forces for long. Of course if they have some help they might do better. And perhaps the reason they are there ties in with the reason Chaos keep knocking on the door.

And that's exact reason for not doing it. Really. If you put all the effort needed to create a Chapter of SM, then why would do it in half-arssed way?

 

Later History

Recently, elements of the Hellbenders chapter fought alongside Inquisitor Schain and the Sororitas of the Preceptory of the Scarlet Petal at the fall of the forgeworld of Kandiis IV. The Hellbenders are presently accompanying the Inquisitor in tracking down the Chaos fleet that attacked the system, as he believes that several war engines may have been captured from the Titan foundries.

 

What does this add? Not meaning to be unkind here but at the moment I'm unsure what this is meant to achieve other then tying your other armies into this article. Perhaps when you develop this into a full article this sort of information could be a nifty side bar, something along the lines of 'Vengeance for Kandis IV' or somesuch. As it stands now I'm not sure if it really adds anything useful.

It's called Later History, so one would expect a description of later campaigns or something. Critique is good, but don't overdo it.

 

I personally thought, due to slow reflexces, the Salamanders were more about short and long range fire fighting, with smashing the enemy apart with weapons that require strength not speed as a last resort. Things like Thunder Hammers and Power Fists. For a slose range fire fight and then stabbing you in the face Chapter your probably more looking at Imperial Fists or possibly even Raven Guard. Of course geneseed doesn't effect tactics, other then White Scars whom are more savage due to their geneseed.

Agreed.

[stilettoblade]

Thanks, Silver Phoenix and NightrawenII, I didn't think that was too harsh at all. :tu:

 

I'll elaborate on all these sections significantly, of course. I'm really just organizing first thoughts into an outline at this point, before I get into actually writing properly.

 

ORIGINS

The Sanguinary Worlds are the source of the Chaos forces that dragged the Sabbat Worlds down from thriving, prosperous area to "unstable/hazardous" classification and the declaration of a long, bloody Crusade to recapture the area. I figured if the region merits a Crusade involving a billion IG, 6 SM chapters, Navy wings and Titans, it might have merited a chapter assigned to it to prevent things getting this bad.

 

I haven't figured out why there's been problems with failed recruits, whether it's the geneseed, the recruit stock, the region... That will come later, all I know now is there are problems.

 

LATER HISTORY

The later history blurb is no more than fluff to tie it to my other armies, this is true. In later versions, I had figured it would likely be a sidebar, I just stuck it in a logical place to keep track of it until then.

 

HOMEWORLD

This is hardly even a first draft, really just arranging my thoughts on the world so I can see where I need to add to it. I'm glad to hear others think the concept has merit, I liked my little monster.

 

COMBAT DOCTRINE

I guess I misunderstood the Sallies doctrine a little, I'll rework that bit a little at some point.

The 5th company, perhaps mechanized is the wrong term. I figured that after over a century of not having enough Marines to fill all the transports they were given, they might have either traded off or retrofitted some to have more heavy firepower, and thus have more tanks vs transports in their armory.

 

 

NAME

I'm sorry if the name points some people to Futurama or Avatar, I didn't actually see those ties until they were pointed out. I really like it, and I don't think it fails as a name for a Marine chapter. Especially after turning the namesake into a death world worthy apex predator.

[Brother Argent]

According to Nightrawen II I came across a bit harsher then I intended and for that I apologise. It was never my intention. Its good to see that you have good reasons for many of the points I raised. I had heard of the Sabbat Worlds but didn't many details other then the name. I must admit I'm not as much of a fluff buff as I should be, but anyway. Perhaps a comment or brief blurb in the start of your Origins section explaining what the Sabbat Crusade was all about for the more ignorant members such as myself out there might be a good idea.

 

As fo the trade ofof transports for tanks I believe part of the way a Rhino Chassis ends up as what it does it because, basically, the "Machine Spirit" is consulted and basically is made into what "it" wants to be. Might cause problems with the "vehicle" as well as the AdMech if you start changing what machine spirits want. Of course I'm a little fuzzy on the whole Machine SPirit thing and exaclty what they are so if anyone (looking at nightrawen) want to disprove me here go ahead.

 

Again I must point out that I feel your article has heaps of potential and am loking forward to seeing it develop.

[fivepointedstar]

I like name hell bender it sounds not like a squat fat dumpy amphibian, but a fierce fire breathing serpent. To help with a home planet name try something similar to where hell benders (in real life are found) like Ozark Prime (a play on the southern USA state where they are found) or something. try giving there home world some flair forget the fact that there's a tin can cartoon character called bender. so what there's also a pun on a homosexual poet, and the dark angels but who cares. so what I"m ranting about is hell bender is an awesome name for your marines. heck I even wanted to make a vehicle called hell bender just for fun. but alas ill have to say, i'd change the color scheme to a light muddy green, and a bright orange. like this:http://i6.photobucket.com/albums/y215/jrh312/Outdoor/Wildlife/June282007029resize.jpg hope this helps you solidify your army's name.