killakai95 Posted November 28, 2010 Share Posted November 28, 2010 Black Dragons Origins The Black Dragons are a chapter shrouded in mystery. They were created using Salamanders Geneseed but their time of creation is unknown. They were created because of the uprising threat of the tau on the eastern fringe. The Black Dragons initiation involves intense psychological training so that instantly recognize tau and their weakness' whenever they fight against them. The Black Dragons Do not trust other chapters of space marines except the salamanders chapter and will not work with them. Homeworld The Black Dragons Fortress Monastery is located on the world of Volcanus IV. The Monastery itself can be located inside the dormant volcano named 'Mount Death' as anyone who has came to attack the base has been through back by the magma rock it launches. Due to the Heat of the World the Black Dragons Skin is the same colour as the Salamanders. During Initiation they have to journey to the bottom of ' Mount Death' and kill a magma giant. Due to their training they are highly resistant if not unaffected by heat. Combat Doctrine The Black Dragons are short range specialists favouring Melta and Flamer weapons. They are also known due to their drop pod insertion as everything drops onto the battlefield. The most famous battle that the Black Dragons were involved in was against WAAAAAGH!GUTCHOPPA where they teamed up with a company of Imperial Guard and Beat back the Ork WAAAAAGH!. The Black Dragons Chapter Master 'Drakon' killed over one hundred Orks that day and then advanced to cleave the Warboss' Head from it's body. Chapter Organisation The Chapter is Organised into eight Companies. All of the Companies have slightly more numbers than the normal companies that Space Marine Chapters Contain. All of the Battle Companies use Drop Pod insertion and favour Melta and Flamers. The Eight Commanders all carry weapons that are replicas of the Chapter Masters but May Vary Slightly. Each Company Contains a variety Of units that can be called on by other Companies. Chapter Beliefs The Chapter Believes that if They destroy all the Tau worlds, one of Vulkan's legendary artefacts will present itself to them and will help them become stronger so they can defeat the enemies of man. They also believe that one day there will e a psychic echo in space and the chaos gods will take a physical form in the battle for the universe. Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/215971-fists-of-drakon-fluff/ Share on other sites More sharing options...
NightrawenII Posted November 28, 2010 Share Posted November 28, 2010 *In best Yoda's voice* "Read more, you should, young padawan learner." Black Dragons Origins The Black Dragons are a chapter shrouded in mystery. They were created using Salamanders Geneseed but their time of creation is unknown. They were created because of the uprising threat of the tau on the eastern fringe. The Black Dragons initiation involves intense psychological training so that instantly recognize tau and their weakness' whenever they fight against them. The Black Dragons Do not trust other chapters of space marines except the salamanders chapter and will not work with them. The Black Dragons were created in the 21th "Cursed" Founding. The gene-seed source is suspected to be Salamanders and the Tau (re-)appeared somewhere around 789.M41. So... No way, Jose! The Black Dragons Chapter Master 'Drakon' killed over one hundred Orks that day and then advanced to cleave the Warboss' Head from it's body. "Aaargh! I'm blind!!" "He is too awesome!" Cookie for anyone, who can guess the reference. :) Edit: Yeah, Yeah..... Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/215971-fists-of-drakon-fluff/#findComment-2574244 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Captain Juan Juarez Posted November 28, 2010 Share Posted November 28, 2010 Tau are short and blue.. An inability to recognise one is pretty serious, but to require intense training to be able to do so? :) Not to mention the obvious deficiency, that my esteemed debating partner has already pointed out. And it's.. "Read more, you should, young padawan learner", thank your very much. Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/215971-fists-of-drakon-fluff/#findComment-2574257 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brother Tyler Posted November 28, 2010 Share Posted November 28, 2010 First things first, is your intent to gather the known information about the Chapter, or is it to develop background material for the Chapter? If the former, I recommend that you do a little more research. Unfortunately, I don't see an article on the Chapter in our Librarium (a gap we'll have to fill, unless I just missed it), so sites such as Lexicanium might provide a good starting point. You might also perform a search here at the B&C in order to find other discussions in which the Black Dragons have been mentioned. If your intent is to develop background material for the Chapter, then I suggest that you first perform the research I described above, and then start a discussion in the Liber Astartes forum where members do DIY work. Origins The Black Dragons are a chapter shrouded in mystery. They were created using Salamanders Geneseed but their time of creation is unknown. They were created because of the uprising threat of the tau on the eastern fringe. The Black Dragons initiation involves intense psychological training so that instantly recognize tau and their weakness' whenever they fight against them. The Black Dragons Do not trust other chapters of space marines except the salamanders chapter and will not work with them. As has been pointed out, the time of the Chapter's founding is known per official background material. The Tau became a threat long after the Black Dragons were created, so I suggest you remove that bit. Homeworld The Black Dragons Fortress Monastery is located on the world of Volcanus IV. The Monastery itself can be located inside the dormant volcano named 'Mount Death' as anyone who has came to attack the base has been through back by the magma rock it launches. Due to the Heat of the World the Black Dragons Skin is the same colour as the Salamanders. During Initiation they have to journey to the bottom of ' Mount Death' and kill a magma giant. Due to their training they are highly resistant if not unaffected by heat. One of the factors that affects the skin color of the Salamanders is the radiation of their homeworld. Does Volcanus IV have similar levels of radiation? The whole magma giant thing seems contrived. It's fairly easy to envision aspirants having to kill beasts, but the concept of a magma giant is somewhat vague. Is it just a giant that lives in/near magma? Is it a creature that is made of magma? Is it intelligent? Is it an abhuman? Is it a daemon? What does being "highly resistant if not unaffected by heat" mean? Are flamer and melta weapons less effective against the Black Dragons? Why has this benefit never been described in the official background material? What can training do that makes a Space Marine resistant to heat? And if all it takes is "training", why isn't everyone doing it? Perhaps you mean "treatment" and/or the benefit isn't being "highly resistant if not unaffected by heat" [attacks]. Combat Doctrine The Black Dragons are short range specialists favouring Melta and Flamer weapons. They are also known due to their drop pod insertion as everything drops onto the battlefield. The most famous battle that the Black Dragons were involved in was against WAAAAAGH!GUTCHOPPA where they teamed up with a company of Imperial Guard and Beat back the Ork WAAAAAGH!. The Black Dragons Chapter Master 'Drakon' killed over one hundred Orks that day and then advanced to cleave the Warboss' Head from it's body. You've completely ignored the known issue of bone spurs that are effective in combat (as described in the Third War for Armageddon fluff and the Cursed Founding rules). The Ork thing seems a bit overdone. I think that an Imperial Guard company helping the Black Dragons (Chapter?) seems out of place, especially when they're stopping a whole Waaagh!!! It's not that they prevented a Waaagh!!! They actually stopped one. A Waaagh!!! is a huge affair and a single Chapter would be hard-pressed to stop all but the smallest of Waaagh!!!s alone (re: the Crimson Fists). A single Imperial Guard company would have very little effect. Chapter Organisation The Chapter is Organised into eight Companies. All of the Companies have slightly more numbers than the normal companies that Space Marine Chapters Contain. All of the Battle Companies use Drop Pod insertion and favour Melta and Flamers. The Eight Commanders all carry weapons that are replicas of the Chapter Masters but May Vary Slightly. Each Company Contains a variety Of units that can be called on by other Companies. Is there any basis in the known material to support the eight companies into which the Chapter is organized? The last two sentences seem to be throw-away statements. They don't seem to tell us anything that matters. Perhaps you should expand upon them in order to better articulate what it is they're meant to say. Alternately, you might consider deleting them if you didn't really mean anything significant by them. Chapter Beliefs The Chapter Believes that if They destroy all the Tau worlds, one of Vulkan's legendary artefacts will present itself to them and will help them become stronger so they can defeat the enemies of man. They also believe that one day there will e a psychic echo in space and the chaos gods will take a physical form in the battle for the universe. With regard to the first, you are basically incorporating the mission of the Forgefather into the Black Dragons. I'm not sure this is wise unless there is a strong relationship between the two Chapters, otherwise the Salamanders and Black Dragons might find themselves in conflict. The last statement seems somewhat apocalyptic. It's not a bad statement, but you haven't told us enough. I would personally get rid of the Tau stuff and focus more on expanding this concept of a battle for the universe, as it builds upon other concepts in the game mythos. To the other members that replied, comments such as "read more" without suggestions about what to read are less than helpful and come off as condescending. Your intent may not have been to be condescending, but that was the end result. There's a whole lot more to providing constructive feedback than making pithy comments. Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/215971-fists-of-drakon-fluff/#findComment-2574301 Share on other sites More sharing options...
killakai95 Posted November 28, 2010 Author Share Posted November 28, 2010 Sorry i didnt know that <_< oops . I have decided to call them the fists of Drakon and sorry i do not read many warhammer 40k informational sources i will change it acordingly Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/215971-fists-of-drakon-fluff/#findComment-2574302 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brother Tyler Posted November 28, 2010 Share Posted November 28, 2010 Ah, then I will move this over to the Liber Astartes forum. Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/215971-fists-of-drakon-fluff/#findComment-2574303 Share on other sites More sharing options...
killakai95 Posted November 28, 2010 Author Share Posted November 28, 2010 The Fists Of Drakon Origins The The Fists Of Drakon are a chapter shrouded in mystery. They were created using Salamanders Geneseed but their time of creation is unknown. They were created because of the Chaos and Xeno threats against the Imperium are constantly growing. The Fists Of Drakon's initiation into the companies involve intense psychological treatment so they cannot feel heat and can instantly recognize any foe and quickly find his weakness. Homeworld The Fists Of Drakon Fortress Monastery is located on the world of Volcanus IV. The Monastery itself can be located inside the dormant volcano named 'Mount Death' as anyone who has came to attack the base has been through back by the magma rock it launches. Due to the Heat of the World the The Fists Of Drakon Skin is the same colour as the Salamanders. During Initiation they have to journey to the bottom of ' Mount Death' and kill a magma giant. Due to their training they are highly resistant if not unaffected by heat. Combat Doctrine The The Fists Of Drakon are short range specialists favouring Melta and Flamer weapons. They are also known due to their drop pod insertion as everything drops onto the battlefield. The most famous battle that The Fists Of Drakon were involved in was the fight for Malachor IV when the chapter master battled for ours on a cliff edge with Ulkar the Chaos Champion. Many Brothers were lost that they but they killed every single Chaos Space Marine in the Chaos Warband Chapter Organisation The Chapter is Organised into eight Companies. All of the Companies have slightly more numbers than the normal companies that Space Marine Chapters Contain. All of the Battle Companies use Drop Pod insertion and favour Melta and Flamers. The Eight Commanders all carry weapons that are replicas of the Chapter Masters but May Vary Slightly. Each Company Contains a variety Of units that can be called on by other Companies. Chapter Beliefs The Chapter Believes that if They destroy all the Tau worlds, one of Vulkan's legendary artefacts will present itself to them and will help them become stronger so they can defeat the enemies of man. They also believe that one day there will e a psychic echo in space and the chaos gods will take a physical form in the battle for the universe. tweaked slightly...what do you think Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/215971-fists-of-drakon-fluff/#findComment-2574312 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shinzaren Posted November 28, 2010 Share Posted November 28, 2010 "Aaargh! I'm blind!!""He is too awesome!" Cookie for anyone, who can guess the reference. :lol: "And attractive!" "How can we repay you stranger?" "There is no charge for awesomeness. Or attractiveness." :) Kung Fu Panda :) Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/215971-fists-of-drakon-fluff/#findComment-2574353 Share on other sites More sharing options...
NightrawenII Posted November 28, 2010 Share Posted November 28, 2010 The The Fists Of Drakon are a chapter shrouded in mystery. They were created using Salamanders Geneseed but their time of creation is unknown. They were created because of the Chaos and Xeno threats against the Imperium are constantly growing. Why is the Founding of FoD shrouded in mystery? Is there any particular reason for doing such thing? The Fists Of Drakon's initiation into the companies involve intense psychological treatment so they cannot feel heat and can instantly recognize any foe and quickly find his weakness What is the source of such tradition? 2nd The part about recognization of foes is innate to all Chapters. It's called Hypno-therapy for some strange reason. ;) Homeworld What does the Volcanus IV. look like? ie Landscape, weather and such... What about people, who live there? Is there anything interesting/special about them?; don't forget that people of the Chapter's homeworld are prime source of the Chapter's traditions, custom and beliefs. What is the magma-giant? What can training do that makes a Space Marine resistant to heat? Combat Doctrine Why do they favour Drop-pod attacks? How do they view Codex Astartes? What tactic or strategy do they prefer? Are they ruthless, savage or cold-minded in the battle? Why do they favour use of melta and flame weapons? Chapter Organisation Why don't they follow the Codex organisation? What make them to not follow the Codex organisation? What about the scouts and veterans? Is there any interesting quirk among the ranks of Chapter specialists? Chapter Beliefs For what do they fight? How do they view their Primarch? What drives them? How do they view the Imperium and their brothers Astartes? Is there any interesting ritual(s)? What is the opinion of outsiders about them? What do they like or admire? What do they loathe and trying to destroy? +++++++++++ "Aaargh! I'm blind!!""He is too awesome!" Cookie for anyone, who can guess the reference. ;) "And attractive!" "How can we repay you stranger?" "There is no charge for awesomeness. Or attractiveness." ;) Kung Fu Panda ;) And we have winner here. B) Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/215971-fists-of-drakon-fluff/#findComment-2574523 Share on other sites More sharing options...
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