The Pilgrims Argyllian

[Pilgrim Argyllian]

This is my first B+C post, I've been "lost in the warp" as it were since the 3rd edition. I had a brief dabble during the 4th edition and I think I may have lurked here then. I hope I'm following all the rules. I've been thinking about these guys for a little while and would like some more informed opinions on them, see the end of the post for my thoughts. Without further ado:

 

THE PILGRIMS ARGYLLIAN

ORIGINS

The Brothers Argyllian were a chapter of the 23rd founding (999M37) using Guilliman’s gene seed. A fleet based chapter charged with protecting the outer reaches of the imperium, they generally operated in the outskirts of Segmentum Obscurus. The chapter diverged little from standard codex layout other than the separation of the headquarters staff, librarium and armoury so as to make best use of the fleet provided for them by the Adeptus Mechanicus.

 

HISTORY

The Ork Pirates and Warbosses from local Ork home-worlds were the main concerns of the chapter, although it was not uncommon to find them fighting the forces of chaos and putting down rebel uprisings due to their proximity to the Eye of Terror. The secondment of Librarian Stylius to the deathwatch, requested due to his expertise in battling the “Weirdboy” psykers of the greenskins, stands as testament to their skill in battling Orks. Intense battles with the Orkoids kept the chapter from defending against the black crusades that ravaged the inner part on segmentum obscurus throughout M38-M40.

 

During a rare lull in activity from the green skins a call for reinforcements from a fellow chapter was received and in 139.m41 it was one of the rare times the entire chapter moved as one. As the chapter fleet emerged from the warp, they were battered by a massive ambush. The other chapter had fallen to the ruinous powers of Slaanesh and joined the fleet heading to the gothic sector for The Despoiler’s 12th Black Crusade.

 

Hopelessly outnumbered by the traitorous navy, the flagship was boarded, the crew expecting a formal meeting of the chapter masters, was not prepared for battle. The final communication from the lead battle barge was a garbled command to fall back, the sound of slaaneshi demons drowning out the voice of their commander. The chapter’s headquarters staff, 2nd and 3rd companies were not heard from again.

 

The second barge in the flotilla containing the librarium, 1st, 5th and 6th companies was torn apart by the massive firepower of the chaos fleet. The escorts and strike cruisers, some containing the 10th scout and 4th battle companies attempted fend off the attackers but faced with insurmountable odds, found themselves lacking for the task.

 

The final battle barge held the chapter’s armoury and forge, 7th (tactical reserve) and 9th (devastator) companies along with most of the chapter’s motor pool. Only the forge ship, being at the rear of the sortie managed to escape the maelstrom, leaping into the warp as the chaos forces launched a massive salvo of torpedoes.

 

The combination of heavy enemy fire and an unprepared jump into the warp sent huge blasts through the vessel killing virtually everyone not fully clad in power armour and leaving the ship in a dire state of repair. The most serious damage was the nigh on complete destruction of the tau-ortah system leaving the ship’s lone surviving pilot unable to slow the acceleration of the ship.

 

A huge number of repairs were required not only to the control system but to numerous other elements of the ship. With the almost all the indentured workers and servitors no more than disfigured, desiccated or disintegrated corpses, it fell to the remaining marines to take up tools. Techmarine Suprema Nychus trained the remaining brothers to perform simple maintenance and other tasks usually undertaken by the servitors, whilst other techmarines attempted to correct the most serious damage.

 

When the Ship finally emerged from the warp they found themselves thousands of lightyears from terra, the astronomican but a vague hum in the darkness. The warp drives were all but annihilated from the months of continuous use. Far out of range of normal communications the only signal to be detected was a faint distress call further out into the reaches of space. From what they could decipher it was emanating from a long forgotten ark mechanicus, the Enano Rojo.

 

The remaining marines had a choice, try to return to terra on their own steam at sub warp speed, a journey that would take centuries, or, travel further out into the unknown in the hope of reaching the ark whereby they may find repair, or spoils yet greater. Some suggested going into sus-an stasis, keeping a rotating skeleton crew whilst the ship edged towards imperial territory. Others wondered what threat could have possibly incapacitated one of the great arks. In the end the decision came down to the highest ranking members of staff.

 

The twin artificers; the Master of the Arsenal and the Master of the Blades were the only headquarters staff that had survived, the preference to be without their helms having cost the Captains of the 7th and 9th companies dearly.

 

Records show the artificers had been inducted to the adaptus astartes together. The sons of a renowned smith both showed great proficiency in all things mechanical and were prime candidates for apprenticeship on mars. During their years in the chapter, servicing, building and maintaining equipment in the forge and on the battlefield they had both come to have a great many number of bionic adaptations. At first glance each seemed to be half man- half machine, some said they were not twins but one man split in two, others quipped that were you to take them both together you’d not find a whole man between them. They had shown great leadership during the time in the warp, smoothly managing the repairs, dividing tasks between the remaining brothers and keeping morale high. The chapter had faith in their decision

 

The brothers entered the armoury alone to consider their situation. After days of deliberation, prayer and calculation they emerged from the forge and in unison declared:

 

“Where those weak of the flesh have sought to destroy us, the body of steel will protect us.

The Ark is a sign from the Omnissiah. We have been saved. Onwards, to the Ark!”

 

This decision was not without detractors, particularly some of the older brothers felt that taking on whatever had incapacitated the ark was foolish and the twins’ devotion to the Omnissah had outweighed their duty to the chapter. The 9th company chaplain declared they would be destroyed for their heresy. He and the others that disagreed with the choice separated themselves from the rest of the chapter, symbolically painting their helms black and vowing to give their lives to redeem the chapter.

 

Others were more pragmatic, suffering losses as great as they had usually spelt the end of a chapter. For over two thousand years they protected Segmentum Obscurus. For two millennia the Brothers Argyllian of green and white fought in the name of the emperor. But now one way or another, either by death vow or becoming black shields, they knew the chapter was no more. Perhaps if they could return to mars with a lost ark or some newly discovered archaotech they might be spared.

 

The destruction was just one factor in their change of viewpoint. Brother Nychus had taught the brothers to revere the power of the machine spirit, they came to thank the Omnissiah for their protection whilst fearing destruction at the hands of the servants of the Emperor. Even if they were to survive, the chapter as it had be would be no more. With new beliefs, new command, and new mission, it was agreed it was time to start anew.

 

The chapter’s power armour was repainted in the rust red of Mars to give thanks for the protection of the Omnissiah. (Leaving of course one shoulder with the original markings so as not to offend the machine spirit of the armour). No longer defined by their brotherhood, dead in the eyes of their father, it was their pilgrimage best defined them and the Pilgrims Argyllian were born.

 

 

HOME WORLD

Shortly after their rebirth the pilgrims came across Cornubbia a tiny mineral rich planet. The planet’s abnormal density created a liveable gravity and despite its diminutive size the world was capable of maintaining an atmosphere.

 

Upon landing it was found to be inhabited by backwards ranchers who rejoiced at the return of the “Men of Iron”. It was deduced the world had been settled millennia ago, by one of the many stasis ships, long before the discovery of warp travel. The planet’s gravity had made the inhabitants strong, their bones shorter and more dense than most humans, although not to the extent of the biological changes seen on the squat worlds inhabited by some of the other early mining vessels. Their forefathers had constructed underground dwellings near the centre of the great plains. These protected the Cornubbians from the fierce ash storms that frequently tore across the surface from the sea of fire that covered much of the southern part of the planet.

 

The leader of the settlement asked for help slay a creature known only as the great beast which had been decimating their cattle herds. After days of searching, a gargantuan squiggoth was sighted to the far east of the plain, in the foothills of the impassable mountains the natives believed covered the rest of the planet. Tremendous firepower was needed to bring the beast down. Eventually the combination of ordnance, energy weapons and holy bolter fire slew the leviathan. In thanks the governor of the world presented to the chapter an ancient mechanical steed. Apparently a gift bestowed upon them by the “men of iron” who had visited generations before. The Pilgrims postured it was not the only technology given to them, they had noticed solid carbon powered tractors seemingly based on the Leman Russ chassis and the technology used to draw water from the steam of the lava vents that dotted the plains was more advanced than the tech of many “civilised” imperial worlds.

 

Following the example of the great Roboute Guilliman of defending planets encountered and hoping to rebuild the chapter to former glory, it was decided that the planet would become their home. The Cornubbians readily agreed to the prospect the Ironmen staying and offered their services to the honoured guests. A dozen brothers were given several tasks by the chapter: first and foremost to maintain a signal so that help may be sought. Secondly they must train and arm a defence force to keep any emerging threats at bay. Whilst doing this they should look for any suitable recruits so that the chapter may grow once again to full strength. If possible, steps should be taken improve the lives of planet dwellers. The expertise in burrowing of the Cornubbians should be used to build a fortress monastery fitting for the great chapter the pilgrims would become and also to mine planet’s natural resources so as to arm a full strength chapter.

 

A tactical squad along with Techmarine Issacia and Apothecary Humberto of the 9th company left the forge ship aboard a thunderhawk gunship containing a rhino apc, a range of tools and hold full of supplies, most important of these were the data slates containing a copy of the Codex Astartes and many designs for arm and armour used by the forgemaster.

 

 

CURRENT MISSION

Most of the chapter are aboard the forge-ship closing on the immobilised ark. The chapter makes planetfall at any opportunity to seek supplies and search for archaeotech. In this unconquered realm they have encountered many hostile races, arachnoid xenos similar to tyranids, the ubiquitous orks, and more rarely a developed race. The pilgrimage has already taken twice the time expected, for three decades they have been travelling, but their faith does not waver, in fact every successful conflict simply reaffirms their conviction in the protection of the machine god.

 

In the years Issacia and Humberto have spent on Cornubbia with their comrades much progress has been made. The mining of the fortress revealed a spring providing water far more safely than the steam reclamation used previously. From the great monuments built into the mountain dominating the great plain, water flows into complex canals, irrigating the agriculture that releases much of the population from the tireless ranching that dominated life on Cornubbia. The Cornubbians, well fed and protected from previously undefeatable foes are eager to help the marines in their construction. Biologically the populous are ideal marines and almost a score of scouts has been recruited from the muscular, strong boned sons of the Cornubbians.

 

BATTLE STYLE

Always outnumbered never outgunned. The Penitents and their Chaplain lead the charge with the pick of chapter’s mêlée weapons. The argyllian riders that accompany the mounted Artificer are adept at taking out enemy armour whilst the heavy weapons fielded by the rest of the force pound the enemies lines. The Pilgrims prefer to keep their distance and make great use of heavy armour and artillery in order to minimise casualties.

 

WARCRY

Low Gothic: Onwards to the ark!

High Gothic: Trahatur ad arcam!

Lingua Technis: 0100111101101110011101110110000101110010011001000111001100100000011101000110111100100000011101000110

1000011001010010000001100001011100100110101100100001

 

HERALDRY AND SYMBOLOGY

Originally a ship at full mast, streamers flowing in the wind. Now a ship of tattered sails, representing their great loss, at anchor, representing their new home world, surrounded by the cog of the Omnissiah, showing the protection given by the machine god. Originally green and white quartered armour, now rust red armour, brass trim with one shoulder quartered green and white.

 

CHAPTER CULT AND BELIEFS

The chapter is reverent to the Omnissiah for saving them seeing the strength in steel over flesh. Many have mixed feelings about the emperor, betrayed that they would be destroyed after millennia in his service, but also eager to return and be welcomed into the fold again. “Iron Father” Nychus handles most rituals, although each pilgrim forges a personal relationship with machine spirit through the blessings and modifications they make not only to their equipment but bodies also. Bionics are seen not as solutions to grievous injuries as in most chapters but as signs of devotion.

 

CHAPTER ORGANISATION AND DIVERGENCES

Only portions of the 7th and 9th companies survived aboard the forge-barge, most of their equipment survived including the majority of the motor pool however the bikes or jump infantry were lost with the battle companies and 6th and 8th reserves. Below are some brief biographies of more notable units and pilgrims in the chapter.

 

The Twin Forgemasters

One the master of ranged weapons (Master of the arsenal?) takes the conversion glaive to battle whilst the other is incharge of the chapter’s mêlée weapons (Master of the Blades?), so great is the chapters fear of losing more high ranking staff they are never seen together on the field of battle, in fact it is rare to see them together under any circumstance. In battle they ride upon the iron steed, a gift from the lord of Cornubbia.

 

The Lost Librarian

Due to his great skill in battling the weirdboys of the Orks he is on secondment to the deathwatch. He heard the cries of his brothers and is trying to get back to the chapter, possibly their only hope for rescue. The imperium believe the Brothers Argyllian to be either destroyed or traitorous. The Librarian was given the chance to become a black shield of the deathwatch but instead absconded and joined with rogue trader to find the missing fleet.

 

Chapter Archivist

With the death of the navigators and loss of the librarium the sole psyker left in the chapter was the a lowly lexicanium. Far below the normal useful level of power but the only hope of navigating that they have. Thankfully the Gellar field protected his fragile mind from the warp beasts that would have otherwise destroyed such an untrained mind. His value the chapter is so great he is afforded the right to one of the few remaining suits of TDA. The armour was left by the lost librarian when the Deathwatch called. Extensively modified to aid the weak psyker, the psychic hood protects him from the perils of the warp whilst the attached storm shield gives defence from more corporeal dangers. All agreed especially the lexicanium himself that it would be disrespectful to give him the title librarian, instead he is referred to as “The Archivist”. His unfortunate lack of power is somewhat made up for by his use of a psychic rod, acting as a sort of warp battery, The Archivist is able to charge the arcane force weapon and unleash its power when required.

 

Penitents

Some of the brothers, particularly some of the elder members of the chapter were not so quick to give up on the emperor and rely on the machine god. Rather than the always outmanned never outgunned philosophy of the rest of the chapter they prefer fight hand to hand far ahead of the rest of the chapter. They seek penitence through death, that of their enemies or their own. Still holding on to the hope that the flagship survived, that the headquarters staff fought the ruinous power and also escaped into the warp. They reject the protection of iron, using no transport except the drop pods to allow them to reach the enemy faster and often fight without their helms. Luckily for them the rest of the chapter’s hands off battle style gives them their pick of the surviving mêlée weapons. In battle and spirit they are lead by the chapter’s remaining chaplain. In a reversal of the actions of the rest of the chapter they display their original colours proudly having repainted only one shoulder black, to represent both the death of their chapter and their dedication to the emperor.

 

Iron Father.

Techmarine Suprema Nychus trained many of the pilgrims not only in the mechanical workings of the ship but also in dealing with the machine spirit. He is seen not only as a skilled techmarine but also as a spiritual guide in the cult mechanicus, his duties are much the same as a chaplain’s in the codex chapters. Without a rosarius he relies on his many bionic adaptations to protect him whilst smiting his enemies with his servo-wrench.

 

Sergeants mechanicus.

In order to aid with repairs the remaining astartes were trained to use various pieces of armoury tools and hardware. The Iron Father taught some to operate the mechanical servo arms normally used by techmarines. Some have chosen to continue to use these mechanical additions, although unable to repair vehicles on the battlefield their hands are left free to use ranged weapons whilst keeping the punch of a power fist if the enemy gets too close.

 

Forge brethren.

These marines used the TDA to carry out repairs on the decks where deadly energy was greatest. On the battlefield, they often form a retinue protecting the invaluable archivist. They are generally armed with the same hammers they use whilst smithing in the plasma and promethium fuelled forge onboard the ship.

 

Argyllian riders.

Cornubbia is home to many beasts all seemingly related to the great squiggoth. Some breeds are kept by the Cornubbians as cattle, whilst smaller more docile breeds are kept as pets. Larger and more viscous breeds are used as transport, ridden like the equines of ancient terra. In hope of replacing the manoeuvrability lost with the destruction of the assault squads and motorcycles, specimens were taken back to the battle barge. Of the squiggoths captures, two destroyed each other in transit, one broke free on ship and had to be put down and two rejected the implants used by the techmarines, leaving just six remaining. Controlled with biomechanical inputs, their already tough hides are bolstered by ceramite armour. Saddles incorporating two holy botlers adorn each beast allowing two power armoured marines to ride into battle. Those skilled enough to controll the beasts they have dual roles: either transporting the Master of the Blades’ command squad into battle, allowing the apothecary, standard bearer, champion and communication expert to keep pace with the iron steed, or, in place of attack bikes in the codex army their brethren using a heavy weapon from the rear of the saddle to destroy enemy heretech.

 

Technoughts

To aid in the more major repairs on ship the interred battle brothers had their hulls fitted with enormous servoarms capable of lifting the hull of a land raider. Massive servowrenches were also cast to make use of their strength. These tools as well as the promethium torches used to weld the massive fissures in the forge ship’s hull, have been used on the battlefield on more than one occasion.

 

TRANSMISSION ENDS

 

Now I know I’ve made a few rookie error and obvious clichés: "Lost" in the warp, close admech ties, near destruction, fluff choices for modelling reasons, etc. But I’m pleased with how they've turned out.

 

Are the real world influences to obvious? enano rojo, tau-ortah, chapter name/ symbol.

 

I will admit that many of the reasons for the background come from things I want to model, the penitents, technoughts, the riders. I’d like to spend a while on each model so the low number of marines thing comes in there. There are several things I think may need to be changed or that I need advice on. I know the writing style needs work and parts may need to be pared or fleshed out but this is the first piece of creative writing I’ve done in years. Thanks for reading, let me have it!

[NightrawenII]

Hello and welcome in the Liber. Now...

 

HISTORY

The chapter diverged little from standard codex layout other than the separation of the headquarters staff, librarium and armoury so as to make best use of the fleet provided for them by the Adeptus Mechanicus.

- Ahem, but What? I don't quite understand the 'separation' you are talking about.

 

During a rare lull in activity from the green skins a call for reinforcements from a fellow chapter was received and in 139.m41 it was one of the rare times the entire chapter moved as one.

- Why was called? / moved as one? / is this rare?

 

Hopelessly outnumbered by the traitorous navy

- Navy or other Chapter?

 

Only the forge ship, being at the rear of the sortie managed to escape the maelstrom, leaping into the warp as the chaos forces launched a massive salvo of torpedoes.

- Btw, if your Chapter have lost its gene-seed stock and the Apothecaries, then it's as well as dead.

 

The most serious damage was the nigh on complete destruction of the tau-ortah system leaving the ship’s lone surviving pilot unable to slow the acceleration of the ship.

- Yeah, because the last thing you would have done, when the brakes don't work is switch off the engines... :D

 

The twin artificers; the Master of the Arsenal and the Master of the Blades were the only headquarters staff that had survived

- .... and suddenly the Mary Sue ex Machina appears... :blink:

- You said the HQ staff and Armoury is separated in your Chapter.

 

Perhaps if they could return to mars with a lost ark or some newly discovered archaotech they might be spared.

- You are talking like the Imperial will shoot them at the sight or something...

 

Brother Nychus had taught the brothers to revere the power of the machine spirit, they came to thank the Omnissiah for their protection whilst fearing destruction at the hands of the servants of the Emperor.

- Uhm... What?

 

The chapter’s power armour was repainted in the rust red of Mars to give thanks for the protection of the Omnissiah. (Leaving of course one shoulder with the original markings so as not to offend the machine spirit of the armour). No longer defined by their brotherhood, dead in the eyes of their father, it was their pilgrimage best defined them and the Pilgrims Argyllian were born.

- The red is reserved for the Scions of Omnissiah. They could introduce red in their markings, but whole armour is far-fetched.

- Second, I don't understand the fallacy of changing the Chapter's name and colour. If you don't want them in the first place, why did you introduce them?

 

HOME WORLD

Shortly after their rebirth the pilgrims came across Cornubbia a tiny mineral rich planet.

- What happened to the Ark and the whole "We are stuck in the middle of nowhere"?

 

Upon landing it was found to be inhabited by backwards ranchers who rejoiced at the return of the “Men of Iron”.

- 'Man of Iron' are/were sentient machines, who turned agaist their masters à la Matrix and 100+ of other Sci-fi scenarios.

 

The planet’s gravity had made the inhabitants strong, their bones shorter and more dense than most humans, although not to the extent of the biological changes seen on the >>Deleted by the will of the Holy Orders of the Emperor's Inquisition.<< worlds inhabited by some of the other early mining vessels.

*Two dark figures appear behind Pilgrim Argyllian and drag him away* - Move on citizens, there is nothing to see. :cuss

 

After days of searching, a gargantuan squiggoth was sighted to the far east of the plain, in the foothills of the impassable mountains the natives believed covered the rest of the planet.

- It is impossible for squiggoth to be here, not without presence of any other orkoid.

 

CHAPTER ORGANISATION AND DIVERGENCES

Some of the brothers, particularly some of the elder members of the chapter were not so quick to give up on the emperor and rely on the machine god.

- Emperor = Omnissiah.

 

Cheers, NightrawenII.

[Pilgrim Argyllian]

Thank you nightrawenII for your comments, I'll think about them and post a new draft. Below are what I'm thinking of doing about each of your points.

 

The chapter diverged little from standard codex layout other than the separation of the headquarters staff, librarium and armoury so as to make best use of the fleet provided for them by the Adeptus Mechanicus.

- Ahem, but What? I don't quite understand the 'separation' you are talking about.

 

The separation I referred to was onto separate vessels, in the standard codex chapter organisation they seem to be all in one group whereas in the angels of death codex, the dark angels separate the armoury from other parts of the chapter. It isn't really that important, I'll make it clearer.

 

 

During a rare lull in activity from the green skins a call for reinforcements from a fellow chapter was received and in 139.m41 it was one of the rare times the entire chapter moved as one.

- Why was called? / moved as one? / is this rare?

 

I will flesh out the bit about the call for help, I thought normally single companies would be sent on strike cruisers rather than everybody travelling together.

 

 

Hopelessly outnumbered by the traitorous navy

- Navy or other Chapter?

 

I was thinking the chapter that called them could have either been destroyed by a mass of ships on the way to the gothic war, or joined that group. My battle fleet gothic knowledge isn't that great. I will make sure to research some more and clear it up.

 

Only the forge ship, being at the rear of the sortie managed to escape the maelstrom, leaping into the warp as the chaos forces launched a massive salvo of torpedoes.

- Btw, if your Chapter have lost its gene-seed stock and the Apothecaries, then it's as well as dead.

 

Does the Admech deal with the gene seed stocks? I was expecting it to be kept by their representatives within the chapter.

 

The most serious damage was the nigh on complete destruction of the tau-ortah system leaving the ship’s lone surviving pilot unable to slow the acceleration of the ship.

- Yeah, because the last thing you would have done, when the brakes don't work is switch off the engines...

 

I was thinking more stuck on the accelerator rather than the brakes won't work, would cutting the engines off in the warp be suicide? I'm not crazy about the whole warp bit but I like where it leads the chapter

 

The twin artificers; the Master of the Arsenal and the Master of the Blades were the only headquarters staff that had survived

- .... and suddenly the Mary Sue ex Machina appears...

- You said the HQ staff and Armoury is separated in your Chapter.

 

I think my naming of the heads of the armoury is the issue here, I just meant them to be the two highest ranking marines left, the techmarine most adept at creating ranged weapons and the one most skilled at creating hand to hand weapons, Master of the arsenal is another thing it seems, I'll think of better titles.

 

Perhaps if they could return to mars with a lost ark or some newly discovered archaotech they might be spared.

- You are talking like the Imperial will shoot them at the sight or something...

Not shoot them, but generally when a chapter suffers so much damage they don't get given the chance to rebuild, I'm thinking they are hoping to increase their chances of being allowed to.

 

Brother Nychus had taught the brothers to revere the power of the machine spirit, they came to thank the Omnissiah for their protection whilst fearing destruction at the hands of the servants of the Emperor.

- Uhm... What?

 

The above point was maybe put across to heavy handedly here, I was struggling with the whole mixed feelings thing, is hard to describe their views, but I will sort it out.

 

The chapter’s power armour was repainted in the rust red of Mars to give thanks for the protection of the Omnissiah. (Leaving of course one shoulder with the original markings so as not to offend the machine spirit of the armour). No longer defined by their brotherhood, dead in the eyes of their father, it was their pilgrimage best defined them and the Pilgrims Argyllian were born.

- The red is reserved for the Scions of Omnissiah. They could introduce red in their markings, but whole armour is far-fetched.

- Second, I don't understand the fallacy of changing the Chapter's name and colour. If you don't want them in the first place, why did you introduce them?

 

I'm trying to make out that it was a big change. This chapter started off when I was thinking about building an Admech army, it all really sprang from there. I will work on the colour scheme, I hear red is generally very popular s may need to make them stand out, especially against chapters with similar views.

 

Shortly after their rebirth the pilgrims came across Cornubbia a tiny mineral rich planet.

- What happened to the Ark and the whole "We are stuck in the middle of nowhere"?

 

I meant miles away from relative civilisation, these guys are of no use in getting back to the imperium, I'm thinking they are a sort of western era race, some steam power but not electricity, the ark is their only way home.

 

Upon landing it was found to be inhabited by backwards ranchers who rejoiced at the return of the “Men of Iron”.

- 'Man of Iron' are/were sentient machines, who turned agaist their masters à la Matrix and 100+ of other Sci-fi scenarios.

 

I was not aware of men of iron being actual characters, i'll think of something else for them to refer to them of. I was putting forward the fact that similar beings had visited them in the past although they were not fully aware of what or who they were. I think I was influenced by the metropolis-esque Admech representative from a sample mission somewhere.

 

The planet’s gravity had made the inhabitants strong, their bones shorter and more dense than most humans, although not to the extent of the biological changes seen on the >>Deleted by the will of the Holy Orders of the Emperor's Inquisition.<< worlds inhabited by some of the other early mining vessels.

*Two dark figures appear behind Pilgrim Argyllian and drag him away* - Move on citizens, there is nothing to see.

 

Yeah I think i just imagined that race, must be something out of star trek or something ;]

 

After days of searching, a gargantuan squiggoth was sighted to the far east of the plain, in the foothills of the impassable mountains the natives believed covered the rest of the planet.

- It is impossible for squiggoth to be here, not without presence of any other orkoid.

 

I'm trying to hint at other Ork like creatures being on the planet, noises in the dark type thing when they are burrowing. Possibly on the other side of the mountains.

 

Some of the brothers, particularly some of the elder members of the chapter were not so quick to give up on the emperor and rely on the machine god.

- Emperor = Omnissiah.

 

I think their feelings about the emperor are the part I've thought about least, so I need to work on.

[Arkangilos]

Some of the brothers, particularly some of the elder members of the chapter were not so quick to give up on the emperor and rely on the machine god.

- Emperor = Omnissiah.

 

To the Cult Mechanicus, machines represent a higher form of life than that created through biological evolution. The ultimate object of the cult's veneration is known as the Machine God (or the Deus Mechanicus), which is believed to have given rise to all technologies and made them manifest through his chosen illuminati among mankind. The Machine God may be the C'tan Void Dragon, who has been entombed on Mars for millennia and was worshipped by the Cult Mechanus before the rise of the Emperor.

 

I have read this in multiple places. It is widely believed that the Emperor is the Omnissiah, but not a fact. For all intents and purposes, you could go either way, though most likely your chapter WOULD believe like Nightwaren said, that the Emperor = the Omnissiah.

 

There Nightwaren, I sided with you... for once... :D

[exetus]

Does the Admech deal with the gene seed stocks? I was expecting it to be kept by their representatives within the chapter.

 

The Adeptus Mechanicus keeps the gene-seed in vaults on various worlds where it is monitored and screened for purity as well as kept in supply for the creation of new chapters. The Magos Biologis and Genetors are the ones that typically deal with the stuff themselves. A Chapter, however, does maintain its own gene-seed as they are only required to provide a tithe to the Admech. Otherwise they would never be able to replenish their own ranks.

 

I was thinking more stuck on the accelerator rather than the brakes won't work, would cutting the engines off in the warp be suicide? I'm not crazy about the whole warp bit but I like where it leads the chapter

 

There are two types of drives on the ships of 40k (maybe more for other races, but two for humans), Warp Drives and Sublight Drives. Typically, the sublight engines, which are used within a system, are plasma drives for vessels large enough. The other set are the Warp Drives on all warp-capable craft. The Warp Drives are responsible for opening a tear between realspace and the Immaterium and allowing a vessel to enter the Warp. It also helps power the Gellar Field. When a ship enters the Warp, it does not use its plasma drives at all and simply "rides the currents" of the Warp to where it needs to go, activating the sublight engines upon reversion to realspace.

[Arkangilos]

But should the Warp Drive fail (without the loss of the Gellar fields) you would be stuck drifting in the warp, never to leave again...

[exetus]

What, exactly do you mean by fail? If the Warp Drive actually FAILS, as in breaks down, then you also lose the Gellar Field. The generator that creates the Gellar Field is an attachment to the Warp Drive. Now if you mean that it fails to execute the function of reverting back to realspace, then yes, you'd be doomed to drift until the Warp spit you out (which happens all of the time, just who knows when it would be).

[Arkangilos]

By fails, I mean the latter of your comments.

[Kastellan Kong]

- Yeah, because the last thing you would have done, when the brakes don't work is switch off the engines... :lol:

 

You do know how much of an effect switching engines off in a vacuum has right? :D

 

edit: Oh it's in the warp?! Missed that completely! :D

[Shinzaren]

During a rare lull in activity from the green skins a call for reinforcements from a fellow chapter was received and in 139.m41 it was one of the rare times the entire chapter moved as one. As the chapter fleet emerged from the warp, they were battered by a massive ambush. The other chapter had fallen to the ruinous powers of Slaanesh and joined the fleet heading to the gothic sector for The Despoiler’s 12th Black Crusade

Who was this other Chapter? Normally I don't advocate placing any emphasis on another Chapter, but this seems to be a significant development and a possible rivalry. Giving them an evil name helps the reader identify that they are really the Vader to your Luke.

 

Hopelessly outnumbered by the traitorous navy, the flagship was boarded, the crew expecting a formal meeting of the chapter masters, was not prepared for battle.

Did the Imperial Navy have elements that turned to Chaos with the Astartes, or is the term navy perhaps better changed to fleet? Also, Space Marines are always ready for battle, and boarding a Astartes Battle Barge is no mean feat. The battle onboard would long, tremendously bloody for both sides, and cost the invaders a very significant portion of their own forces. In the case of fleet based Chapters, the Battle Barge is their home, and so would contain its most powerful weapons, Dreadnoughts, artificer weapons, etc etc. Taking one would be a big deal.

 

The final communication from the lead battle barge was a garbled command to fall back, the sound of slaaneshi demons drowning out the voice of their commander. The chapter’s headquarters staff, 2nd and 3rd companies were not heard from again.

Not to mention that 2 companies, plus the command structure of the Chapter is a mighty force indeed.

 

The second barge in the flotilla containing the librarium, 1st, 5th and 6th companies was torn apart by the massive firepower of the chaos fleet. The escorts and strike cruisers, some containing the 10th scout and 4th battle companies attempted fend off the attackers but faced with insurmountable odds, found themselves lacking for the task.

Why did they board the first vessel and annihilate the second? Why not board both, or annihilate both?

 

The final battle barge held the chapter’s armoury and forge, 7th (tactical reserve) and 9th (devastator) companies along with most of the chapter’s motor pool. Only the forge ship, being at the rear of the sortie managed to escape the maelstrom, leaping into the warp as the chaos forces launched a massive salvo of torpedoes.

Did the final battle barge escape as well? Its fate is unclear.

 

The combination of heavy enemy fire and an unprepared jump into the warp sent huge blasts through the vessel killing virtually everyone not fully clad in power armour and leaving the ship in a dire state of repair. The most serious damage was the nigh on complete destruction of the tau-ortah system leaving the ship’s lone surviving pilot unable to slow the acceleration of the ship.

Maybe I am just missing something, but what is a tau-ortah system? I've never heard of it before.

 

A huge number of repairs were required not only to the control system but to numerous other elements of the ship. With the almost all the indentured workers and servitors no more than disfigured, desiccated or disintegrated corpses, it fell to the remaining marines to take up tools. Techmarine Suprema Nychus trained the remaining brothers to perform simple maintenance and other tasks usually undertaken by the servitors, whilst other techmarines attempted to correct the most serious damage.

In the Warp, any damage to the ship runs the risk of damaging the Gellar Fields that keep the vessel safe from the Warp. If your ship is this badly damaged, how did your field stay up? Why haven't demons swarmed the ruined vessel and finished you? Perhaps make mention that the efforts of repair were focused almost entirely on keeping the Gellar Field up until they were sure it was stabilized?

 

This decision was not without detractors, particularly some of the older brothers felt that taking on whatever had incapacitated the ark was foolish and the twins’ devotion to the Omnissah had outweighed their duty to the chapter. The 9th company chaplain declared they would be destroyed for their heresy. He and the others that disagreed with the choice separated themselves from the rest of the chapter, symbolically painting their helms black and vowing to give their lives to redeem the chapter.

Where did they go? They have one ship between them and they are in the void of space. Separating themselves and painting their helmets is a pointless gesture since they can't go anywhere. Also, why disagree with their decision? It's not like they had a lot of options in the first place?

 

The destruction was just one factor in their change of viewpoint. Brother Nychus had taught the brothers to revere the power of the machine spirit, they came to thank the Omnissiah for their protection whilst fearing destruction at the hands of the servants of the Emperor. Even if they were to survive, the chapter as it had be would be no more. With new beliefs, new command, and new mission, it was agreed it was time to start anew.

I'm confused. Why would they fear destruction at the hands of the Emperor's servants? Its not like they are renegades or anything.

 

The chapter’s power armour was repainted in the rust red of Mars to give thanks for the protection of the Omnissiah. (Leaving of course one shoulder with the original markings so as not to offend the machine spirit of the armour). No longer defined by their brotherhood, dead in the eyes of their father, it was their pilgrimage best defined them and the Pilgrims Argyllian were born.

Where are they getting the paint? Do they have buckets of it onboard their ship?

 

Upon landing it was found to be inhabited by backwards ranchers who rejoiced at the return of the “Men of Iron”. It was deduced the world had been settled millennia ago, by one of the many stasis ships, long before the discovery of warp travel. The planet’s gravity had made the inhabitants strong, their bones shorter and more dense than most humans, although not to the extent of the biological changes seen on the squat worlds inhabited by some of the other early mining vessels. Their forefathers had constructed underground dwellings near the centre of the great plains. These protected the Cornubbians from the fierce ash storms that frequently tore across the surface from the sea of fire that covered much of the southern part of the planet.

Space Western! Yeah! Makes me wanna watch Trigun :woot:

 

The leader of the settlement asked for help slay a creature known only as the great beast which had been decimating their cattle herds. After days of searching, a gargantuan squiggoth was sighted to the far east of the plain, in the foothills of the impassable mountains the natives believed covered the rest of the planet. Tremendous firepower was needed to bring the beast down. Eventually the combination of ordnance, energy weapons and holy bolter fire slew the leviathan. In thanks the governor of the world presented to the chapter an ancient mechanical steed. Apparently a gift bestowed upon them by the “men of iron” who had visited generations before. The Pilgrims postured it was not the only technology given to them, they had noticed solid carbon powered tractors seemingly based on the Leman Russ chassis and the technology used to draw water from the steam of the lava vents that dotted the plains was more advanced than the tech of many “civilised” imperial worlds.

Trigun! :) Also, if their technology was that advanced, why weren't they capable of crafting new weapons capable of slaying the Squiggoth on their own?

 

Most of the chapter are aboard the forge-ship closing on the immobilised ark. The chapter makes planetfall at any opportunity to seek supplies and search for archaeotech. In this unconquered realm they have encountered many hostile races, arachnoid xenos similar to tyranids, the ubiquitous orks, and more rarely a developed race. The pilgrimage has already taken twice the time expected, for three decades they have been travelling, but their faith does not waver, in fact every successful conflict simply reaffirms their conviction in the protection of the machine god.

You've started with ~250 marines. Some must have been lost in the jump to warp, plus some more split from your chapter. Following that your chapter was divided again when you found the new planet. Assuming you lost 25 marines in the warp jump, 50 to the new faction that splint from you, and dropped off 10 or so on the planet, you only have 165 marines, with no way to replenish your losses. Combine that with the constant battles, and the attrition of war and it is doubtful your chapter will even see the Ark.

 

In the years Issacia and Humberto have spent on Cornubbia with their comrades much progress has been made. The mining of the fortress revealed a spring providing water far more safely than the steam reclamation used previously. From the great monuments built into the mountain dominating the great plain, water flows into complex canals, irrigating the agriculture that releases much of the population from the tireless ranching that dominated life on Cornubbia. The Cornubbians, well fed and protected from previously undefeatable foes are eager to help the marines in their construction. Biologically the populous are ideal marines and almost a score of scouts has been recruited from the muscular, strong boned sons of the Cornubbians.

How are they recruited? I thought you only left them with an APC and some tools. Without the Apothecarium, it is impossible to make marines. Perhaps you have a well trained auxiliary instead? Also, this brings up an interesting point. Do you have any Gene-seed left? Typically gene-seed is kept in the most secure vault on the Chapter's homeworld, or in the strongest room of their main ship. Since your main ship was captured/destroyed, does this mean your gene-seed is gone? If so, you can no longer rebuild your chapter, and you will die out. Without gene-seed and an Apothecarium you cannot make new marines.

 

Always outnumbered never outgunned. The Penitents and their Chaplain lead the charge with the pick of chapter’s mêlée weapons. The argyllian riders that accompany the mounted Artificer are adept at taking out enemy armour whilst the heavy weapons fielded by the rest of the force pound the enemies lines. The Pilgrims prefer to keep their distance and make great use of heavy armour and artillery in order to minimise casualties.

Who are the Penitents? If they split from the chapter, why are still fighting together? What are the Argyllian Riders?

 

The chapter is reverent to the Omnissiah for saving them seeing the strength in steel over flesh. Many have mixed feelings about the emperor, betrayed that they would be destroyed after millennia in his service, but also eager to return and be welcomed into the fold again.

How did the Emperor betray you? It was traitors that attacked you, not the Emperor's forces.

 

Only portions of the 7th and 9th companies survived aboard the forge-barge, most of their equipment survived including the majority of the motor pool however the bikes or jump infantry were lost with the battle companies and 6th and 8th reserves.

Wait... Only portions of the companies survived? My above estimate was off a bit. You are definitely not going to make it to that Ark. You simply don't have the numbers.

 

In battle they ride upon the iron steed, a gift from the lord of Cornubbia.

What is the Iron Steed?

 

Due to his great skill in battling the weirdboys of the Orks he is on secondment to the deathwatch. He heard the cries of his brothers and is trying to get back to the chapter, possibly their only hope for rescue. The imperium believe the Brothers Argyllian to be either destroyed or traitorous. The Librarian was given the chance to become a black shield of the deathwatch but instead absconded and joined with rogue trader to find the missing fleet.

How did he hear it? It isn't like Star Wars :huh: He didn't hear a 1000 voices crying out in terror and were suddenly silenced.

 

Chapter Archivist

With the death of the navigators and loss of the librarium the sole psyker left in the chapter was the a lowly lexicanium. Far below the normal useful level of power but the only hope of navigating that they have. Thankfully the Gellar field protected his fragile mind from the warp beasts that would have otherwise destroyed such an untrained mind. His value the chapter is so great he is afforded the right to one of the few remaining suits of TDA. The armour was left by the lost librarian when the Deathwatch called. Extensively modified to aid the weak psyker, the psychic hood protects him from the perils of the warp whilst the attached storm shield gives defence from more corporeal dangers. All agreed especially the lexicanium himself that it would be disrespectful to give him the title librarian, instead he is referred to as “The Archivist”. His unfortunate lack of power is somewhat made up for by his use of a psychic rod, acting as a sort of warp battery, The Archivist is able to charge the arcane force weapon and unleash its power when required.

Even the lowliest Lexicanium is still a gifted and powerful psyker. They have to be to withstand the simply pressures of living everyday. Librarians are under constant danger of being possessed, which is why only the strongest are even considered for acceptance. A weak psyker would never be made a space marine. The danger is too great.

 

Penitents

Some of the brothers, particularly some of the elder members of the chapter were not so quick to give up on the emperor and rely on the machine god. Rather than the always outmanned never outgunned philosophy of the rest of the chapter they prefer fight hand to hand far ahead of the rest of the chapter. They seek penitence through death, that of their enemies or their own. Still holding on to the hope that the flagship survived, that the headquarters staff fought the ruinous power and also escaped into the warp. They reject the protection of iron, using no transport except the drop pods to allow them to reach the enemy faster and often fight without their helms. Luckily for them the rest of the chapter’s hands off battle style gives them their pick of the surviving mêlée weapons. In battle and spirit they are lead by the chapter’s remaining chaplain. In a reversal of the actions of the rest of the chapter they display their original colours proudly having repainted only one shoulder black, to represent both the death of their chapter and their dedication to the emperor.

Greatly conflicting ideals and styles wouldn't last long in an enclosed space like a ship. Especially in soldiers are doggedly and fanatically loyal as Space Marines. If they thought their brothers were turning from the Emperor, they would try to destroy, or at the very least get as far away possible. Space Marines don't really deal in middle ground. .

 

Technoughts

To aid in the more major repairs on ship the interred battle brothers had their hulls fitted with enormous servoarms capable of lifting the hull of a land raider. Massive servowrenches were also cast to make use of their strength. These tools as well as the promethium torches used to weld the massive fissures in the forge ship’s hull, have been used on the battlefield on more than one occasion.

Dreadnoughts already have powerful arms and a fire based weapon. Changing the name to Technoughts just seems to different for different's sake. I don't really think it's needed at all.

 

All in all this was a really fun read. I like the idea of a desperate chapter out on the edge, doing everything they can to survive and make their journey. That said, I think you are getting too caught up in the modeling/table top aspect. Generally fluff and table top don't mix well. Instead of making the IA fit the models, write the IA and try to make it work all on its own, with all the modeling influences. That doesn't mean you shouldn't try to work your ideas into the IA and the models, just don't crowbar in something to IA because it makes an awesome model. That said, it is still a fun idea and has some definite good points.