Dark Boars - Loyal chapter

[Dave Townsend]

Origins

 

Formed from the Space wolf and Dark Angel chapters during the great crusades of the Primarchs several years before the Horus Heresy, the Dark boars is a chapter formed from diversity, and warrior brother bonds rather than the adaptations of the adeptus mechanicus in later founding’s.

 

During the crusade of the great wolf Lemun Russ, the wolves were engaged in the destruction of an Ork invasion of a star system. With the planets of the system cleansed and purged the wolves hunted down the splintered Ork fleet.

One such hunt involving wolves aboard the strike cruiser Black Dawn led to a space battle of immense proportions, where the imperial fleet with much superior fire power battled against a mass of Ork Rocks and a mighty space hulk. During the engagement the strike cruiser battled through the middle of the engagement, but suffered massive damage to it’s warp engines. Without warning the warp engines engaged, and only the quick reactions of the crew allowed the activation of the geller field before translation into the warp. Stranded in the warp for several months the engines finally came back on line, but thrust the cruiser into an unknown part of space. Irreparably damaged the cruiser was forced to effect a landing on a giant of a planet nearly entirely encased in forest.

Immediately they sent out a distress signal, but stranded as they were many light years from help they were isolated for nearly 2 years battling feral Orks and gigantic beasts. The more ferocious of the beasts being a giant Boar twice the height of a space marine at it’s shoulders.

 

The saviours of the Wolves were the Dark Angels. A single cruiser being sent to effect the rescue. Believing themselves in a position to show the wolves who was the better chapter they landed in force as the wolves were embattled against a horde of Orks. Easily crushing the Orks the pride of the Dark Angels was decimated when an alien race appeared from the warp en masse, and engaged the Dark Angel cruiser.

 

The aliens made landfall, while there fleet chased the strike cruiser from the skies of the planet. Forced out of the system the Dark Angel Strike Cruiser was unable to return as Warp storms brought about by the betrayal of the Warmaster himself encased the system the chapters had found themselves in. The two chapters remained locked in the system before the storms finally lifted in the years of M41.

 

The Joining of rivals

 

Trapped on the planet together the two chapters renewed there rivalry. In there time alone the wolves had salvaged everything that could be torn from the belly of the Black Dawn. What remained of the cruiser sank in a mass bog where it had struck the planet. The beasts had made there toll on the wolf numbers, especially the human crew of the ship. To escape the beasts clutches, and to make for a better defensive position the wolves had erected mass structures suspended between the trees. Some of the trees being nearly 1 km tall.

 

The Angels saw the home of the wolves and could see the benefit, and majesty in the structure, but would not admit the Wolves may have got something right, so settled in the ground below the Wolves tree top structures. This left the Angels vulnerable to the beats, and they attacked with greater ferocity, and numbers. The Angels used there knowledge of fighting the beast of Caliban, and fared better than the Wolves, but the losses were still great. The Angels relied on the support network of the wolves and the few servitors, and imperial followers that they had. Also the weapons, and ammunition the wolves had salvaged in abundance.

 

Neither the wolves or the angels knew of the aliens landing, but that soon changed when a daring attack was made on a Wolf scouting party. Chaplain Krimval was captured. And 20 wolves killed in the lightning ambush of over 200 vile aliens.

 

The Angel Captain Marcus approached the Wolf Captain Gewarth and gave his entire Angel force to the Wolves to aid them. The Angels had a score to settle, and the wolves wanted there Chaplain back, and both settled there differences on the grounds of revenge against a common enemy.

The ensuing engagement saw the slaughter and annihilation of the enemy forces on the planet.

Gewarth was found, although he was brutally injured. His survival was dependant on his incarnation in a dreadnought. In a final show of camaraderie the Angels gave the wolves the body of a dreadnought who’s occupant had died in a beast attack.

 

The wolves asked the Angels to join them in their base in the trees as a thank you for there assistance, and the survival of their chaplain. From that day the two forces slowly began to bond and adapt to each others styles turning them into the chapter they are today.

 

The Discovery of the Imperium

 

In the years of M41 the warp storms lifted, and an exploratory fleet of Imperial craft came to the world, now called horror by the astartes that called it there home world. Quickly the inquisition became involved, along with the high lords of terra, and the adeptus mechanicus. The planet was quarantined, and they were held to account for their beliefs, and to whether they still believed in the emperor or if they were a splinter group of a traitor legion.

In this time the chapter had renamed itself the Dark Boars, after the great beasts that roamed the forests. Contingent of Wolf Lords attended the planet, believing they may have found descendants of the great crusade and a pure gene seed source leading back to their Primarch. Horrified at the chapters amalgamation with the Dark Angels and their belief the gene seed had been diluted with a weaker and inferior type they left the planet. Extremely vocal about their disgust at the treachery of their so called brothers the high Lords of Terra were becoming increasingly concerned about the chapters future.

Next to arrive was a contingent from the Dark Angels. Again seeking descendants of their original founding, and also to determine their position in regards to the fallen, and their allegiance to the chapter. After months of questioning, that more resembled interrogation, of key members of the chapter, especially those of the Dark Master, and the Reclusiarch Chaplain the Dark Angels had no fear of the allegiance of the chapter and it’s astartes. Confiding the destruction of Caliban, and the history of the fallen in full to the Dark Master, and the Reclusiarch the Dark Angels hoped to form an allegiance with the Dark Boars. The Dark Master was distraught at discovering the destruction of Caliban, the planet held in revere with the chapter, along with the wolf home Fenris. Combined with the discovery of the treachery of the fallen The Dark Master showed his displeasure to the Dark Angels. With the Boar Master by his side, the ecclesiarch, and Master of the forest, and the entire Veteran company at their back the Dark Angels were marched from the Tree fortress to their waiting thunder hawk under force of arms. They were banished from the planet with a simple instruction, if they returned the chapter would raise up arms and treat them as the enemy.

Fearful that the Dark Boars would relinquish the truth of the fallen they gave a glowing report to the High Lords of Terra in regards to the loyalty of the chapter, but then left before pledging their support in integrating them into the imperium.

The Dark Angels fears were unfounded, ad the Dark Master agreed with the Reclusiarch to hold the information about the Dark Angels and the fallen to themselves. Fearful themselves that it would cause a rift within there own chapter that would shake it to the core, and be the beginnings of it’s own demise.

 

Still undecided the high lords gave the Dark Boars a reprieve in as much as they wished to test them in the fires of battle. Entrusted with specific war zones and tasks, some little more than worthy of Imperial guard intervention, others more like suicidal missions. The High Lords gave specific instructions to what resources the Dark Boars would give to each war zone, leaving the Boars feeling cheated and ostracised. To make matters worse the multitude of tribes, established in the time they were isolated, stopped sending their greatest warriors for initiation to the chapter. Those warriors sent were not the tribes strongest, and therefore the numbers of new recruits dwindled to a mere trickle.

The tribes were afraid of the full force of the High Lords of Terra being excised on the Dark Boars, and that if they found them wanting the fate of the tribes that sided with the boars would be decided along with them.

 

This continued for nearly half a century. Some of the battle zones entrusted to the Dark Boars were viscous and dangerous battle zones, and the chapters numbers dwindled as the High Lords of Terra maintained there tight control on the actions of the chapter.

 

Recognition

 

Then came the battle of Presterpian, where a small Ork war band challenged the system to which the only hospitable planet was named. The only fully functioning force of the Dark Boars being the 5th company was sent to defend the planet. Easily defeating the Orks there the 5th were preparing to leave when a Tau invasion fleet engaged the small support fleet and drove it from the system. The Tau landed a large force on the planet, unaware of the 5th’s presence, and intending the planet to be the linchpin in a bigger sector offences. Utilising the guerrilla tactics the Dark Boars are renowned for, striking deep into the heart of the enemy, hard and fast, but fluid and adaptable, the 5th proved a thorn in the side of the Tau forces on Presterpian. Having hampered the Tau for many months the 5th were being hunted from all sides.

While 2 squads lead by the companies fledgling chaplain Carlrin aided a small white scar force that had come to the aid of the planet the remainder of the 5th were hunted down and destroyed by the full weight of the Tau forces. Believing the 5th to be gone the weakened Tau force having barely defeated their enemy felt safe to continue their operations. Carlrin reigning in the hatred and anger for the Tau that pulsed in the veins of the remaining warriors of the 5th had different ideas. Utilising the fast attack of the white scars, and the tactics of the Dark Boars a brilliantly organised and devastating strike was made on the Tau main base. Managing to destroy the main port, comms array, a massed collection of waiting armour, and several of the high command of the Tau forces. The remaining Astartes held their own in a bitter fight to the end. With only 11 warriors remaining as well as Carlrin, and barely 8 White scars they bedded themselves in for a fight to the death amongst the carnal house of dead Tau in the centre of there own base. It was at this point that drop pods and thunder hawks of the White scars, along with warriors of the Dark Boars 1st, 2nd and 4th companies landed around the embattled forces. Elements of the Dark Boars 3rd company of heavy weapons and veteran scouts landed on the outskirts of the base reining fire and death upon the Tau.

The planet was cleansed of the invading Xenos, and the invasion force was beaten back from the system.

The high Lords of Terra could not ignore the bravery and courage of the Dark Boars in their cleansing of the Presterpian system, and the halting of an entire Tau invasion force.

 

The Dark Boars were recognised as a space marine chapter of the imperium. They were given strike cruisers, and technical support from the adeptus mechanicus to make up for the short fall in arms due to their extended period of isolation.

 

The Dark Boars were born.

 

Home world

 

The planet horror was named for the nightmare beasts that prowl the dark forests that cover the majority of the planet.

The planet was originally populated by feral Orks, and the beasts, but with the landing of the Black Dawn came man and astartes.

The astartes settled first, forming the beginning of the tree top world. The trees in the great malevolent forest can grow to a kilometres high, with trunks 50m thick, and became ideal support structures for the mass buildings constructed in their midst.

As time passed the tree top fortress grew, and it’s structure became stronger and grander. With the destruction of the alien force, and the moving into the trees by all the astartes the imperial men and women of the Black Dawn began to expand through the trees.

As the years moved by villages began and expanded within the forest canopy. As years rolled into centuries and then millennia the villages developed there own cultures, and histories. As time passed the tribes began to supply it’s strongest warriors to fill the ranks of the Dark Boars.

 

The great boars became the focus of the great hunts. Warriors would gain great honour by finding, tracking, and killing these magnificent and powerful beasts. The tusks would be worn as trophy necklaces, and the talons fashioned into weapons of pride and honour.

 

The jungles of horror adapted the Dark boars to adapt there fighting style of infiltration, and fast attack.

 

Horror was Only one planet in a system of 8. Three were gas giants, but they were surrounded by several moons, 13 between them. Of these over half of them were stable enough to allow planet fall. Of the remaining 5 planets two were too close to the ball of fire that was the systems sun. The temperatures on the surface of the planets hot enough to melt ceramite within seconds.

 

The remaining two planets sustained life. Although much smaller than horror they became the focus of many Ork attacks, and later invasions from the Tau empire. The Dark Boars having cleared the planets of the Xenos and populated it with imperial lives defended there small system. With the arrival of the Tau they found an enemy that resembled the alien scum that had stranded them millennia before. The Dark Boars swore an oath to destroy the Tau wherever they threatened their system

 

Combat Doctrine

 

The boars fighting style is based around there years on horror, fighting Orks and beasts in the dense forests.

They took this style and used it to fight off various insurgents into the system. Without the ability to travel between the various systems and galaxies due to having no warp space capable ships, the Boars took to defending their small piece of space with vigour and zeal.

 

The boars have moved away from the typical space marine way of fighting. They prefer to use guile and infiltration to work units in close. They will then attack fast and hard on their feet. Once engaged they will practice fast movement and fluid action, taking the fight to the enemy until they are defeated.

The boars will systematically attack weak and strong points. Using the skills to get closer than the enemy would ever dream possible they then strike at the heart of the enemy. While the first strike hit’s the enemy at it’s heart, and second strike at it’s weakest point allows the Dark boars to sweep into an enemy. Once in their midst the boars will destroy an enemy from the inside through fluid and fast fire fights and close combat action.

To this end the Dark Boars use experienced scout units to scope out the enemy, and to establish the best plans for attack. Hunter squads with two specialist weapons, usually meltas or plasma weapons form the main stay of the attack, without the burden of a heavy weapon. These are bolstered by the use of more typical Tactical squads sacrificing movement to be able to bring a more powerful punch to the attack. Blood Tusk assault squads give the close combat push, while more skilled assault units with jump packs swoop in to strike deep into the enemy.

When dealing with more embattled or tougher opponents Dark Tusk heavy weapons teams will pound the enemy from distance giving needed support to the main strike.

Fast attack support comes from a contingent of Land speeders and bikes, allowing for flanking manoeuvres.

Support is also available from Dreadnoughts, predators, and Land Raider Redeemers.

The first company offer stability and leadership either through veteran and Tusk Guard units, or with the powerful punch of Terminator Tusk Guards.

Following the traditions of the Space Wolves, and with a following of the forest, the Dark Boars have a liking towards plasma weapons, including Plasma Cannons on their dreadnoughts and Dark Tusks, plasma guns for the hunter squads, and plasma pistols for the squad leaders. There is also a liking towards storm hammers and shields, lightning claws, and power axes.

With the chapters gift of space craft they have adapted to utilise Drop Pods. Still preferring to be dropped out from the enemy and to walk there way in, once the battle is started drop pods are used to deliver the big punch. Often Dreadnoughts and terminators and fired down into the centre of a battlefield to bolster the main strike, and deliver the killing blow to the enemy.

 

Gene Seed

 

The Dark Boars are rare to most chapters. There gene seed is from the first founding, and has simply been carried forth from there. There has been no mixing, or attempts at mixing the two chapters gene seed, knowing that this was against the Emperors great design. Through the ages some of those directly descended from the Wolves have changed, and have become less animalistic, joining Tactical units of mainly Dark Angel origins. Likewise some of the Dark Angel descendants have embraced the more feral nature of the wolves and have joined the Blood tusk ranks, fighting there battles from the front lines in the melee of close combat.

The wolf descendants still suffer from the mark of the wulfen curse, and although the chapter apothecaries try to maintain records of descendancy, they have been caught out as the curse has overwhelmed some unexpectedly.

[Dave Townsend]

Please give full and frank critism of the above, and if possible I’ll adapt what I need to.

The idea for chapter structure is as follows

Two company masters, one more in tune with his animalistic side, the Boar Master. Acts more hot headed, and leads by example from the front. Disregarding his judgement leads to a fight to establish dominance, and the Master will always win. The other Master is more reserved and of a knightly fashion, the Dark Master. It is not what he says, but what he implies that should be acknowledged. He leads through wisdom and honour.

Again the chapter will have a mixture of more Dark angel types (Interrogator chaplain, Tactical squads, veteran and command squads, and a small raven wing contingent (mainly land speeders). There will then be the more space wolf types (Librarian, hunter and tusk squads, long fangs, wolf scouts and wolf guard.

Want to keep a 10 company structure to the chapter, but around 120 per company except the 1st which is 100.

 

 

Been working on this with my 10 year old son, and our war hammer knowledge is limited. Any help in making the chapter history fit in better would be ideal.

 

Main thought is on the alien race that strands the Dark Angels. Was thinking of a Tau orientated race to maintain the Tau as there hated enemy. Any one know how this would work around Heresy era.

[Olis]

Quick question - how did the Space Wolves and the Dark Angels last 10,000 years in isolation? I don't think a native population on Horror was mentioned...

 

And the alien thing? I don't think tying the Tau in would work given the time period. I'd leave them unnamed imho. ;)

 

Edit: Saw the bit on Imperial servants being with them but still, my original question stands.

[Dave Townsend]

Was considering that originaly there was more than 1000 of the combined astartes. Numbers dwindle but the geneseed is stored. As the imperials bed in, and begin to prosper the chapter is bolstered by there numbers in time.

 

As the chapter was in isolation it's fighting was lmited, so astartes lived longer, and veterans were more commonplace.

Actions of the high Lords of Terra casued alot of the older astartes to be killed off.

 

Could argue, although it would not be in the history of a glorious chapter, that as it was isolated it's fighting ability was blunted by the lack of good enemies to fight. Although veterens in age the actual battle experience was not there.

The chapter gained this experience in the fighting forced upon them by the High Lords

 

Does that make it sound more plausible.

 

Agree on the Tau thing. Thought it wouldn't fit.

[Shinzaren]

Please give full and frank critism of the above, and if possible I’ll adapt what I need to.

I am going to take this to heart, mainly because full and frank is my default setting. I am very blunt, which shouldn't be taken as a personal attack on you or your work.

 

Formed from the Space wolf and Dark Angel chapters during the great crusades of the Primarchs several years before the Horus Heresy, the Dark boars is a chapter formed from diversity, and warrior brother bonds rather than the adaptations of the adeptus mechanicus in later founding’s.

This immediately flies in the face of conventional wisdom, which explains that lost elements of a Legion/Chapter wouldn't form a new Chapter, but would rather be absorbed and reintegrated into their existing Chapters. This goes doubly for the Dark Angels, who have a list of the names of every missing Marine from the Heresy, whom they assume are all traitors in need of a good killing.

 

...but suffered massive damage to it’s warp engines. Without warning the warp engines engaged, and only the quick reactions of the crew allowed the activation of the geller field before translation into the warp.

Wait, the Warp is already HUGELY dangerous with perfectly functioning engines and Gellar Fields. I have a hard time believing that a damaged engine would suddenly engage and send them safely into the warp.

 

Stranded in the warp for several months the engines finally came back on line, but thrust the cruiser into an unknown part of space. Irreparably damaged the cruiser was forced to effect a landing on a giant of a planet nearly entirely encased in forest.

Giant planet=Giant Gravity Field. Too big and it the pressure would simply render the Marines unable to do battle. It's a nitpicky thing I know, but I just thought I would point out how the word Giant read to me :yes:

 

The saviours of the Wolves were the Dark Angels. A single cruiser being sent to effect the rescue. Believing themselves in a position to show the wolves who was the better chapter they landed in force as the wolves were embattled against a horde of Orks. Easily crushing the Orks the pride of the Dark Angels was decimated when an alien race appeared from the warp en masse, and engaged the Dark Angel cruiser.

Which Aliens? Is it an established race, or a brand new one you are inventing for this story?

 

The aliens made landfall, while there fleet chased the strike cruiser from the skies of the planet. Forced out of the system the Dark Angel Strike Cruiser was unable to return as Warp storms brought about by the betrayal of the Warmaster himself encased the system the chapters had found themselves in. The two chapters remained locked in the system before the storms finally lifted in the years of M41.

That is a REALLY long Warp Storm. They survived for 10,000 years, cut off from a Forge, an Apothecarium, any method of rearmament and resupply? Not to mention the fact that tensions between the two Legions would have probably forced them to blows. And again, limited resources.

 

Neither the wolves or the angels knew of the aliens landing, but that soon changed when a daring attack was made on a Wolf scouting party. Chaplain Krimval was captured. And 20 wolves killed in the lightning ambush of over 200 vile aliens.

Yikes, that is a lot of Wolves killed in a single battle, especially since your numbers are quite limited. A Strike Cruiser holds anywhere from 1-2 Companies at most, which is roughly 200 marines. You just lost between 10-20% of your forces in one battle.

 

The Angel Captain Marcus approached the Wolf Captain Gewarth and gave his entire Angel force to the Wolves to aid them.

Wouldn't it be the other way around? The Wolves are the ones who need help and have the biggest score to settle. Not to mention the Dark Angel's stubborn and intractable nature.

 

Gewarth was found, although he was brutally injured. His survival was dependant on his incarnation in a dreadnought. In a final show of camaraderie the Angels gave the wolves the body of a dreadnought who’s occupant had died in a beast attack.

Why wasn't he killed outright? How did the occupant of the Dreadnought die without the Dreadnought being rendered completely unusable barring a total overhaul from the Chapter Forge?

 

In this time the chapter had renamed itself the Dark Boars, after the great beasts that roamed the forests. Contingent of Wolf Lords attended the planet, believing they may have found descendants of the great crusade and a pure gene seed source leading back to their Primarch. Horrified at the chapters amalgamation with the Dark Angels and their belief the gene seed had been diluted with a weaker and inferior type they left the planet.

I doubt this very much. The original gene-seed was the purity of the original Legion. Also, this still doesn't answer any of the questions of HOW they survived as Marines. Assuming Marines are able to reproduce, and they had some women, they could survive as a society, but without a human populace to recruit from, and an Apothecarium to build new marines, your Chapter will eventually die out, either from attrition in battle, or old age.

 

Extremely vocal about their disgust at the treachery of their so called brothers the high Lords of Terra were becoming increasingly concerned about the chapters future.

What treachery? They survived (I don't know how, but they did) It's not treachery at all. I think the Wolves are overreacting by leaps and bounds to a situation that could easily be explained away by the necessity to survive.

 

Next to arrive was a contingent from the Dark Angels. Again seeking descendants of their original founding, and also to determine their position in regards to the fallen, and their allegiance to the chapter. After months of questioning, that more resembled interrogation, of key members of the chapter, especially those of the Dark Master, and the Reclusiarch Chaplain the Dark Angels had no fear of the allegiance of the chapter and it’s astartes. Confiding the destruction of Caliban, and the history of the fallen in full to the Dark Master, and the Reclusiarch the Dark Angels hoped to form an allegiance with the Dark Boars.

Say whaaa? They just handed over one of the most closely guarded secrets in the Imperium after a brief hello and a bit of questioning? I find that VERY hard to believe. Not to mention you are talking about them being one chapter now, which means they just turned the secret of the Fallen over to the Space Wolves....

 

The Dark Master was distraught at discovering the destruction of Caliban, the planet held in revere with the chapter, along with the wolf home Fenris. Combined with the discovery of the treachery of the fallen The Dark Master showed his displeasure to the Dark Angels. With the Boar Master by his side, the ecclesiarch, and Master of the forest, and the entire Veteran company at their back the Dark Angels were marched from the Tree fortress to their waiting thunder hawk under force of arms. They were banished from the planet with a simple instruction, if they returned the chapter would raise up arms and treat them as the enemy.

Again...what? Everyone in this story seems to have EXTREME overreactions to all sorts of events. Why would the Dark Boars blame the modern Dark Angels? Why would they basically pick a fight with one of the oldest and most storied chapters? Why would they antagonize the people would probably have the most say in regards to whether or not the HLoT bombed them into oblivion?

 

Fearful that the Dark Boars would relinquish the truth of the fallen they gave a glowing report to the High Lords of Terra in regards to the loyalty of the chapter, but then left before pledging their support in integrating them into the imperium.

That doesn't seem like the Dark Angels way. Their way is to shoot first, shoot second, shoot some more, and when everyone is dead, check the bodies for evidence of their secret leaking out. They have antagonized the largest Chapter in the Imperium (Black Templars), for less.

 

Still undecided the high lords gave the Dark Boars a reprieve in as much as they wished to test them in the fires of battle. Entrusted with specific war zones and tasks, some little more than worthy of Imperial guard intervention, others more like suicidal missions. The High Lords gave specific instructions to what resources the Dark Boars would give to each war zone, leaving the Boars feeling cheated and ostracised. To make matters worse the multitude of tribes, established in the time they were isolated, stopped sending their greatest warriors for initiation to the chapter. Those warriors sent were not the tribes strongest, and therefore the numbers of new recruits dwindled to a mere trickle.

This just doesn't seem reasonable. The Imperium is more of an All or Nothing kind of place. You are either in, or you're out and by out, I mean dead. Also, the High Lords have much better things to worry about, rather than micromanaging what resources a chapter is allowed to use in battle.

 

The tribes were afraid of the full force of the High Lords of Terra being excised on the Dark Boars, and that if they found them wanting the fate of the tribes that sided with the boars would be decided along with them.

How do the Tribes know of the High Lords, their power, or the danger they pose? When the DA/Wolves landed, there was no Imperium, no High Lords, no Ecclesiarchy. The HLoT would be a new and completely strange entity to the tribes, and I doubt they would have any inkling of the threat they posed.

 

While 2 squads lead by the companies fledgling chaplain Carlrin aided a small white scar force that had come to the aid of the planet the remainder of the 5th were hunted down and destroyed by the full weight of the Tau forces. Believing the 5th to be gone the weakened Tau force having barely defeated their enemy felt safe to continue their operations.

Name dropping the White Scars. Also, if they barely defeated the 5th, and were weakened, wouldn't it make sense to wait for reinforcements before continuing to antagonize the Imperium?

 

The high Lords of Terra could not ignore the bravery and courage of the Dark Boars in their cleansing of the Presterpian system, and the halting of an entire Tau invasion force.

No credit for the White Scars?

 

As the years moved by villages began and expanded within the forest canopy. As years rolled into centuries and then millennia the villages developed there own cultures, and histories. As time passed the tribes began to supply it’s strongest warriors to fill the ranks of the Dark Boars.

Even though in the time it would take a Strike Cruiser's crew to repopulate and settle a hostile planet would basically doom the Astartes. They couldn't pop out recruits fast enough, and build a steady population growth. Not mention that if the breeding populace had any one of a number of genetic oddities, the gene-seed would never take. Populating a planet from a Strike Cruiser is improbable at best, and asking that same new populace to also supply recruits is just silly.

Blood Tusk assault squads give the close combat push, while more skilled assault units with jump packs swoop in to strike deep into the enemy.

"I really want to be Space Wolves." That is what I got from calling your assault units Blood Tusks.

 

Following the traditions of the Space Wolves, and with a following of the forest, the Dark Boars have a liking towards plasma weapons, including Plasma Cannons on their dreadnoughts and Dark Tusks, plasma guns for the hunter squads, and plasma pistols for the squad leaders. There is also a liking towards storm hammers and shields, lightning claws, and power axes.

Actually, Dark Angels are more noted for their use of Plasma Tech than the Wolves, because the DA are the oldest chapter, with one of the most ancient armories. This gives them access to more ancient and revered tech, like Plasma weapons. Wolves are never stated as having a particular fondness for Plasma weaponry. That reasoning also means that is unlikely that your Dreads will have Plasma tech as it is rare and finicky in the best maintained armories, which your stranded chapter definitely wouldn't have.

 

The Dark Boars are rare to most chapters. There gene seed is from the first founding, and has simply been carried forth from there. There has been no mixing, or attempts at mixing the two chapters gene seed, knowing that this was against the Emperors great design. Through the ages some of those directly descended from the Wolves have changed, and have become less animalistic, joining Tactical units of mainly Dark Angel origins.

As time passes, the gene-seed is likely to become MORE unstable, not less; resulting in Wolves that are MORE savage and animalistic.

 

 

Whew, all done :) So, I pointed out things that I think need work. That said, this is definitely a creative idea, with lots of thought and effort behind it. Hopefully I was able to help a bit and give you something to think about.

[Dave Townsend]

This immediately flies in the face of conventional wisdom, which explains that lost elements of a Legion/Chapter wouldn't form a new Chapter, but would rather be absorbed and reintegrated into their existing Chapters. This goes doubly for the Dark Angels, who have a list of the names of every missing Marine from the Heresy, whom they assume are all traitors in need of a good killing.

As far as i am aware, there is no other writings about two chapters being stuck in each others pockets for an extremly extended period of time. The facts of why they don't intigrate is explained later, and as i said, there is no other account of marines being stuck together for extended periods of time relying on each other for defence and strength.

 

Wait, the Warp is already HUGELY dangerous with perfectly functioning engines and Gellar Fields. I have a hard time believing that a damaged engine would suddenly engage and send them safely into the warp.

Why wouldn't the engine engage. I'm not a warp drive engineer, and i don't think there is many around who would be able to answer the question correctly. It gives a more credible account of the chapters luck, that they were able to engage the geller field and control the jump into the warp. The malfunction is with the warp drive only, and it's this they are unable to control.

 

Giant planet=Giant Gravity Field. Too big and it the pressure would simply render the Marines unable to do battle. It's a nitpicky thing I know, but I just thought I would point out how the word Giant read to me ;)

I don't know astronomical terms, and i don't know if space marines do either. I could call the planet ginormous, massive, humoungus, but feel Giant is suitable enough. Lets ust say that the gravity is not sufficiently strong to stop the marines from functioning.

 

Which Aliens? Is it an established race, or a brand new one you are inventing for this story?

I have no idea about the aliens. I wanted to keep a trend for Tau, but that will have to change for the other changes i will need to implement. If anyone has suitable suggestions of a race that they could come across. As long as they have access to a space fleet that could fight off a strike cruiser, and are around during the heresy, i may be able to fit them in.

 

That is a REALLY long Warp Storm. They survived for 10,000 years, cut off from a Forge, an Apothecarium, any method of rearmament and resupply? Not to mention the fact that tensions between the two Legions would have probably forced them to blows. And again, limited resources.

Considering changing the length of time away. The idea was to have the fabled 5th company the heroes of the chapter. My son wanted to utilise the 5th as his main figure army, and to wield Carlrin as a hero figure. I'm thinking to keep the 5th and the saviour storline, but backdate it, change the enemy, and then have the later 5th my son uses as a later batch.

 

Yikes, that is a lot of Wolves killed in a single battle, especially since your numbers are quite limited. A Strike Cruiser holds anywhere from 1-2 Companies at most, which is roughly 200 marines. You just lost between 10-20% of your forces in one battle.

Will change the number to 5, a small scout party, massively overwhelmed.

 

Why wasn't he killed outright? How did the occupant of the Dreadnought die without the Dreadnought being rendered completely unusable barring a total overhaul from the Chapter Forge?

He was injured in the firefight, and the aliens felt they would capture him, find out the strength of the enemy. You can't explain everything in all stories, especially when you are trying to make things fit in. The dreadnought will just have to be accepted as a loss in a previous engagement. I will add a large contingent of adeptus mechanicus on the wolf ship. They help to maintain wargear, and keep things going, along with a number of techmarines.

 

I doubt this very much. The original gene-seed was the purity of the original Legion. Also, this still doesn't answer any of the questions of HOW they survived as Marines. Assuming Marines are able to reproduce, and they had some women, they could survive as a society, but without a human populace to recruit from, and an Apothecarium to build new marines, your Chapter will eventually die out, either from attrition in battle, or old age.

Ok maybe badly written, but the idea is ti show the wolves wanting to bring their bretheren back to the fold. The questions about the chapter surviving will have to be addressed by reducing the length of time in the warp. I will add a strong apothecarion input from the Dark Angels, as they were on a rescue mission after all. Supplies from the Black Dawn (wolf ship) has allowed the building of a makeshift apothecarion. The populace came from those on the imperial ship. I may have to introduce a local people, and the imperials will join these, creating a larger imperial contingent. Marines will be older, as they are fighting less. Could add items in regards to the first attempts to integrate new recruits as failures, to try and compensate.

 

What treachery? They survived (I don't know how, but they did) It's not treachery at all. I think the Wolves are overreacting by leaps and bounds to a situation that could easily be explained away by the necessity to survive.

The treachery is the fact the wolves merged with the Angels, they were supposed to be hating each other. Also the wolves don't follow wolves, they follow boars. The Space WOlves saw thius as breaking from there tradition, and beliefs, so felt it was a betrayal of there ways.

 

Say whaaa? They just handed over one of the most closely guarded secrets in the Imperium after a brief hello and a bit of questioning? I find that VERY hard to believe. Not to mention you are talking about them being one chapter now, which means they just turned the secret of the Fallen over to the Space Wolves....

Did feel this would be contencious. Maybe will drop the matter of the fallen, and will keep the fall of Caliban. Anyone good on Dark Angels to gve advice on how much they may indulge, even if just to the chapter master.

 

Again...what? Everyone in this story seems to have EXTREME overreactions to all sorts of events. Why would the Dark Boars blame the modern Dark Angels? Why would they basically pick a fight with one of the oldest and most storied chapters? Why would they antagonize the people would probably have the most say in regards to whether or not the HLoT bombed them into oblivion?

Again advice from Dark Angel fanatics. The idea was to not cause a war between the two chapters, but that they would not be friends. Would the Dark Angels really want to start a war against a chapter being looked at strongly by the HLoT, would this not just bring more scutiny to them as to why they would be doing this.

 

That doesn't seem like the Dark Angels way. Their way is to shoot first, shoot second, shoot some more, and when everyone is dead, check the bodies for evidence of their secret leaking out. They have antagonized the largest Chapter in the Imperium (Black Templars), for less.

Ok, perhaps will tone down the HLoT control, perhaps they could pass it on to the Inquisition to coduct the investigation. The Dark Boars are a new idea when it comes to chapters merging, no mixing of gene seed, but a chapter that merges through diversity. They are unsure of them, but at the same time do not want to dismiss them.

 

This just doesn't seem reasonable. The Imperium is more of an All or Nothing kind of place. You are either in, or you're out and by out, I mean dead. Also, the High Lords have much better things to worry about, rather than micromanaging what resources a chapter is allowed to use in battle.

Ok, perhaps will tone down the HLoT control, perhaps they could pass it on to the Inquisition to coduct the investigation. The Dark Boars are a new idea when it comes to chapters merging, no mixing of gene seed, but a chapter that merges through diversity. They are unsure of them, but at the same time do not want to dismiss them.

 

No credit for the White Scars?

I'd be better re-writing this to give the white scars some more credit. I wanted to have the white scars as friends of the DArk Boars, and therfore named them in the chapters history.

 

"I really want to be Space Wolves." That is what I got from calling your assault units Blood Tusks.

Am trying to utilise Wolf and Dark Angel codexes, so hence the adaptation of wolf names. Dark Angels don't have any specific named units, so can;t name drop them in it.

 

Actually, Dark Angels are more noted for their use of Plasma Tech than the Wolves, because the DA are the oldest chapter, with one of the most ancient armories. This gives them access to more ancient and revered tech, like Plasma weapons. Wolves are never stated as having a particular fondness for Plasma weaponry. That reasoning also means that is unlikely that your Dreads will have Plasma tech as it is rare and finicky in the best maintained armories, which your stranded chapter definitely wouldn't have.

Ok will re write it to change it round. WIll have to check the Space Wolf codex again, cause i was sure there was something about plasma tech in there.

[JaM_TW]

Loads of text, but: it's "their", not "there". See the first few sentences in "the joining of rivals".

If you are going to fix something, fix at least that.

 

I can see them teaming up, but I am not sure they would EVER trust another that well, espescially DA and SW.

Mixing of squads can be done (and should eb probably, if this brotherhood wants to field full squads), but they'd be never a whole chapter. Different geneseed and all that.

 

You could use the chaos dex. Summoning deamons might be aspirants that were laying in hiding, waiting to spring the trap or something. It will give you some hard troops (zerkers/spacewolves, plasma wielding nurgle marines/DAs,...) and may give your army that "depleted" look.

 

But the timespan you've chosen is LONG. Far too long for marines to survive (even without conflict), espescially if they dont have the means to replenish their losses. Getting new marines battle ready takes a lot of resources.

[Brother-Sergeant Bohemond]

Hi, its a good and I liked it, once I got part the whole 'woh, DA and SW?? Together??' thing. Then you ruined it with the whole 'DA scared of a random chapter so backed down after revealing secrets'. but, hey, that can be changed :)

 

I agree with most of the criticism...time frame is too long, they would be all dead by now I feel, somehow you need a recruitment pool large enough to get decent aspirants and to keep the chapter alive. Also, SW geneseed only works on Fenrisian people (may be wrong?? Someone clarify/correct). The warp storm: too long. They dont, really, last thaaat long, not unless there is a big big big event in the warp (kinda like pre-Slaanesh Birth).

 

As a DA fan/supporter/player...all I can say is this: Bring them back into the fold, if they dont want in, exterminatus the planet (HLoT would do this, especially if they are cncerned about treachery). If they are scared, they would wipe out the Dark Boars someway, probs by saying 'boss, they were traitors, so we dealt with them' to the High Lords.

The DA would never, ever, just never divulge info about the fallen to anyone who doesnt need to know. heck, the SGM (Azrael) si the only guy who knows the truth, and even then there are things he doesnt know...so, no, they wouldnt tell them anything. Maybe Caliban blowing up, just maybe...but I think theyd rather shoot them all to be safe, cause, hey, one of them might, just might be a fallen marine...

 

The whole SW/DA rivalry....could become friends...although unlikely, I adhere to the whole The lion and Russ actually ended up as friends philosophy in the relationship, but its not gonna stop me picking on the space puppies :tu:

 

thats it for now, DA is hard to do as a unique idea fue to the whole 'fallen, lets kill them and anyone else who knows'

 

Oh, and remember the DA are more than a chapter, they are a whole Legion (we just pretend that we are not while we await the Lions coming), so you mess with one, you mess with all...