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"Failed to persecute the hunt for the Fallen with sufficient zeal" sounds better as a reason for the rift between them and the DA Legion rather than they just didnt hunt them at all. Ummm, its a little intersting with Salvius, maybe he had a vision from the Emperor where he sees the plight of the Imperium and he sees how the abandoning is wrong in the eyes of the Emperor (who cares if he did have a vision or not, its all conjecture), but, knowing how the other DA feel, he manages to only have the Direwing hunt the fallen. He doesnt abandon the Imperium with 'normal' marines, and the 1st company...what do they do again?
From their very inception the chapter were influenced by Interrogator-Chaplain Salvius. A fiery and inspiring individual, devoted Chaplain and the youngest to be admitted to the Inner Circle after discovering the secret for him-self.

This is a little borderline on Mary Sue and, when you look at the rest of article, unneccessary.

 

Choosing to prove their loyalty in other ways, initially they were accused of “Failing to persecute the hunt for the Fallen with sufficient zeal". This caused a rift, risking open warfare between them and the rest of the Unforgiven, reluctantly they accepted this as their duty.

Don't get me wrong, but the Unforgiven aren't roaming the Galaxy solely because of the Hunt of the Fallen. They are Chapter of Adeptus Astartes, the Hunt is hidden and secret agenda. And the Angels of Absolution are hunting because they want, not because they must.

 

The Direwing were created and granted the sacred mission of searching for the Fallen, upholding their obligation to their brothers. So far, this has been seen as a successful compromise by many Supreme Grand Masters, but there are many within the Inner Circle who still does not wholly trust Salvius and the Dire Wolves……

Considering the DA themself have company with such duty/purpose, the Ravenwing. I can't see how is this something new and/or unique.

Thanks for the comments, I find them very helpful :P

 

@bohemond

 

He doesn’t abandon the Imperium with 'normal' marines, and the 1st company...what do they do again?

 

Still playing around with them at the moment, I was thinking of having the knowledge of the fallen driving some marines slightly mad, unable to cope with the shame they become obsessed with proving themselves, so they are used as some sort of shock attack unit. Bezerkers in TAD, so to speak.

 

 

 

@Nightrawen

This is a little borderline on Mary Sue and, when you look at the rest of article, unneccessary.

I was thinking that I after I’d posted it, I will delete it. ;)

 

Don't get me wrong, but the Unforgiven aren't roaming the Galaxy solely because of the Hunt of the Fallen. They are Chapter of Adeptus Astartes, the Hunt is hidden and secret agenda. And the Angels of Absolution are hunting because they want, not because they must.

From what I’ve read, the unforgiving seams to think that the search for the fallen is their primary mission. Whole companies and even entire chapters have abandon their allies, causing the loss of entire army’s and even planets, just to track one down. The Angles of Redemption are a prime example of this. The Angles of Absolution feel no shame about the Fallen, like many other chapters do, but still feel it’s their duty to find them.

 

“Though the Angles of Absolution fear no spiritual damnation from the fall, they consider themselves responsible for meting out the punishment upon the traitors as an act of temporal contrition.” Codex: Dark Angles.

 

The Dire Wolves feel the shame just as much as the rest, but they don’t believe sacrificing lives to search for the fallen is the best way to resolve it. They believe in helping their allies and defeating the emperor’s enemies, thus proving their loyalty, would be a far better way. I’m guessing this would upset the rest of the Unforgiven, they might even view the Dire Wolves as traitors themselves, and they would never risk the secret being discovered. So to keep on good terms with the rest of the Unforgiven and to carry on with the search, but in a minor way, they created the Direwing who’s sole job is to search for the fallen.

 

 

Considering the DA themself have company with such duty/purpose, the Ravenwing. I can't see how is this something new and/or unique.

It operates slightly different really. If they heard a remour of an Fallen marine, instead of the whole company/chapter going to investigate/capture/kill, leaving the Imperium undefended as they see it, only the Direwing would be sent. The rest of the chapter would continue with whatever missions they were needed for. That’s the plan anyway. ^_^

Edited by Banelord

Had a bit of a re-think,Hows this sound?

 

From their very inception the chapter were influenced by Interrogator-Chaplain Salvius. A fiery and inspiring individual and devoted Interrogator-Chaplain, He was the primary choice to become the spiritual teacher of the new chapter. While teaching the Dire Wolves on Anatolia, Salvius started to have visions of Lion El'Jonson. At first he dismissed them as nothing, mere dreams, until they began to speak to him. It is said that the Lion told him, “the Emperor would judge them by their own actions not that of their Fallen brothers“, and that, “he must lead a new crusade to purge the Emperors enemies, to provide a light in these dark times”. Nobody knows if it was the true Lion El'Jonson, but it was enough to make Salvius question his beliefs. Once training was complete, Salvius was the only member of the training cadre to stay. This gave him free rein to express his radical visions, which the Dire Wolves eagerly received. Empowered by their sacred mission, they chose to continue their crusade instead of withdrawing to go on a hunt, but they were soon accused of “Failing to persecute the hunt for the Fallen with sufficient zeal". This caused a major schism, risking open warfare between them and the rest of the Unforgiven; reluctantly they accepted the duty of the hunt. The Direwing were soon created and granted the sole honour of searching for the Fallen, upholding their obligation to their brothers. So far, this has been seen as a successful compromise by many Supreme Grand Masters, but there are many within the Inner Circle who still do not wholly trust Salvius and the Dire Wolves……

 

Still a bit rough, but I like the idel of them thinking they are on some crusade given to them by El'Jonson :lol:

Edited by Banelord
Looks good, but the schism would be kept secret as well, ONLY the Inner Circle of the Chapters would know. marine B of the 4th Company, Dire Wolves would not know of the schism, or near schism at all. Neither would Marines A, C and D of the Dark Angels Chapter. I like the crusade idea, its very reminiscent of the dark angels of the pre-heresy.
From their very inception the chapter were influenced by Interrogator-Chaplain Salvius. A fiery and inspiring individual and devoted Interrogator-Chaplain, He was the primary choice to become the spiritual teacher of the new chapter. Legends say that while teaching on Anatolia, Salvius started to receive visions from Lion El'Jonson. At first he dismissed them as nothing, mere dreams, until they began to speak to him. It is said that the Lion told him, “the Emperor would judge them by their own actions not that of their Fallen brothers“, and that, “he must lead a new crusade to purge the Emperors enemies, to provide light in these dark times”. Nobody knows if it was the true Lion El'Jonson, but it was enough to make Salvius question his beliefs. After training, Salvius was the only member of the Inner Circle of the cadre to stay, giving him free rein to indoctrinate the Dire Wolves to his radical visions. Initially, stories of the visions were spread throughout the chapter, empowering them. It got to the point where members of the Dire Wolves Inner circle chose, several times, to continue with their crusade instead of withdrawing to go on a hunt. This started to caused a major schism between them and the rest of the Unforgiven; Being accused of “Failing to persecute the hunt for the Fallen with sufficient zeal", the risk open warfare soon became immense, unwilling to fight their brothers, they reluctantly accepted the duty of the hunt. The Direwing were soon created and granted the sole honour of searching for the Fallen, upholding their obligation to their brothers. While only members of the Deathwing were told of their Crusade and visions of Salvius. So far, this has been seen as a successful compromise by many Supreme Grand Masters, but there are many within the Inner Circle who still does not wholly trust Salvius and the Dire Wolves……

 

 

Hows this? :D

Hmmmm...

 

Something is still not sitting right with me....I dont know what it is...I think its the seeming lack of shame that memebrs of their Legion fell. And the qute from his dream: “the Emperor would judge them by their own actions not that of their Fallen brothers“ is misguiding, makes me think that he thought that the Lion would judge the entire Unforgiven based upon the actions of the traitors, but I know what you are getting at.

 

Maybe it should read "I, the Lion, (not Emp) will judge you, not on you're success in the hunt, but upon your dedication to the vision of my Father"

 

And we come back to the idea that your chapetr seems to know the truth?? No, thats a secret still, it has to be to protect the Dark Angels from the Inquisition and their bretheren. And you. You have the same geneseed, do you want to be guilty because some Inquistor feels that, after learning the truth, that ALL descendents if the Lion are too traitoris?

 

Make it less like open war, perhaps the SGM at the time along with a few other GM visited your GrandMaster to have a 'chat' about the lack of participation in the hunt, maybe due to their non appearence a high ranking fallen (Cypher) escaped? Perhaps there is a faction of Int-Chaplains that were still dedicated to the hunt in your DW, as well as some Marines that were also dedicated. the Direwing are then seconded to be the hunting aspect led by these Int-Chappies to bring the Fallen to justice? Leaving the other 9 companies to slaughter the enemies of the Emperor and look after the citizens.

Maybe it should read "I, the Lion, (not Emp) will judge you, not on you're success in the hunt, but upon your dedication to the vision of my Father"

 

 

I had another re-think, and barrowed this :tu:

 

From their very inception the chapter were influenced by Interrogator-Chaplain Salvius. A fiery and inspiring individual and devoted Interrogator-Chaplain, He was the primary choice to become the spiritual teacher of the new chapter. Legends say that while teaching on Anatolia, Salvius started to receive visions from Lion El'Jonson. At first he dismissed them as nothing, mere dreams, until they began to speak to him. It is said that the Lion told him, “I, the Lion, will judge you, not on you're success in the hunt, but upon your dedication to the vision of my Father, to this end I choose you to initiate a crusade to purge the Emperors enemies, to provide a shinning beacon in these dark times”. Nobody knows if it was the true Lion El'Jonson, but it was enough to make Salvius question his beliefs. Initially, stories of the visions began to spread throughout the Inner Circle, casting much doubt on the Dire Wolves true motives. Trouble began when members of the Dire Wolves Inner circle chose to continue with their crusade instead of withdrawing to go on a hunt, allowing the one known as Cypher to escape justice. This caused a major schism between them and the rest of the Unforgiven; Being accused of “Failing to persecute the hunt for the Fallen with sufficient zeal" and some even calling them traitors. The Supreme Grand Master soon summoned Salvius and his fellow masters, to The Rock, to be judged. After a long trial, and many tests of faith, the Dire Wolves were deemed untainted and loyal by the Librarian Grand Master. So, it was decreed that they could continue with their crusade, but only under one condition. That a company Dire Wolves would continue with the hunt. So it was the Direwing were created and granted the sole honour of searching for the Fallen, upholding their obligation to their brothers. While only members of the Deathwing were told of their Crusade and visions of Salvius. So far, this has been seen as a successful compromise by many Supreme Grand Masters, but there are many within the Inner Circle who still does not wholly trust Salvius and the Dire Wolves……
Yup! looks better now. I also like the idea of the Legion shown here.

 

Im ok with this Nice work!

 

 

Thanks ;)

 

Going to give them an earler founing to help fit with their part in the Liber Astartes Campaign.

 

After lose of several chapters, during the Black crusade of 999.M37, Segmentum Pacificus was left dangerously weakened. Thus, it was that the Dire Wolves were founded with the sole purpose of reinforcing the Segmentum….

 

It was in 000.M38, during the 23rd founding, that the Dire Wolves were created. Permission was given for gene-seed to be used from the Angels of Vengeance, the reasons are surrounded by rumour and conjecture as the gene-seed from Lion El'Jonson was seldom used in previous foundings. But it’s alleged because of the strain of gene-seed stocks, due to the huge looses during the Black Crusade of 000.M38. A small cadre of veterans from the Angels of Vengeance were given the honour training them, including the now infamous Interrogator-Chaplain Salvius. They started relatively small in strength, comprising of only a company of marines supplied with a modest amount of equipment, including the strike cruiser Emperor’s Retribution.

 

Does this sound possible?

It doesnt seem neccessary really, they were formed to bolster the region is good enough

 

 

Because of this:

It was during this founding that the “Dire Wolves” were created. Permission was given for gene-seed to be used from the “Angels of Vengeance”, due to the purity of their gene-seed. This was unexpected as the gene-seed from Lion El'Jonson was seldom used in previous founding’s.

 

This is somewhat weak. It can be summarized thus: "Normally this doesn't happen, but it did this time for no discernible reason." You need stronger reasoning, which you can provide in 2 ways:

 

1. Invent a halfway plausible reason that connects to the theme of the chapter

2. If you are going for a mysterious theme, have it be lost to history.

 

From what i've read, this gene-sead is not often used so I feel it needs justifying. But I can't think of a good reason! :)

Edited by Banelord

In the IA9, the Marines Errant were created in 23rd Founding, "in the latter part of M37". Also:

 

*The 23rd is generally believed by Imperial scholars to have been one of serie of linked Foundings around this period designed to repair the power and losses of Chapters in the preseceding millenia.

~

Given the circumstances, the Marines Errant +several other Chapters were from the beginning perceived as crusading Chapters and were created from the most stable gene-seed available.*

~ These are modified quotes, but the content is the same. Take from that what you want.

Edited by NightrawenII
And the DA geneseed is very pure. so thats an excuse if I ever saw one.

 

True, thats why its strange why they seldom use it :P . This is from the DIY guide:

 

There is little information on how frequently the different gene seeds are used by the Imperium. We know that more than half of all chapters come from Guilliman's line. The gene seed of Leman Russ has never been used after the ill-fated Wolf Brothers. Finally, the High Lords are reluctant to use the gene seed of Lion El'Jonson, and seem to have halted the use of Sanguisius' gene seed. Of the remaining five Primarchs, nothing is stated about their usage but it can be presumed all have been used to create successor chapters.
In the IA9, the Marines Errant were created in 23rd Founding, "in the latter part of M37". Also:

 

*The 23rd is generally believed by Imperial scholars to have been one of serie of linked Foundings around this period designed to repair the power and losses of Chapters in the preseceding millenia.

~

Given the circumstances, the Marines Errant +several other Chapters were from the beginning perceived as crusading Chapters and were created from the most stable gene-seed available.*

~ These are modified quotes, but the content is the same. Take from that what you want.

 

Thanks, I might have to use some of this :lol:

they are reluctant to use it, but it doesnt mean they wont use it. Sanguinus and Leman they dont use for obvious reasons...

 

But, I beleive they still use the Lions geneseed, not as much as the Ultras or others, but they still use it, (Corax's is stuffed, so his is probably not used that much).

 

if you take away Sang, Leman and Corx as well as the Lion, thats only 5 left to make Marines from. Then you have complictaions with Magnus (AdMech links/ties, possiblke problems) and you are down to 4...makes sense that they use Corax, Manus and the Lion a little, but enough for there to be a few chapters round with their geneseed.

Had time to do a quick edit :huh:

 

 

I
t was in 000.M38, during the 23rd founding, that the Dire Wolves were created. Due to losses of Chapters in the preceding millennia, Segmentum Pacificus was left dangerously undermined. Thus, it was that the Dire Wolves were founded, with the sole purpose of reinforcing the Segmentum….

 

Permission was given for gene-seed to be used from the Angels of Vengeance, as it was alleged to be the most stable gene-seed available at the time. But the true reasons are surrounded by rumour and conjecture as the gene-seed from Lion El'Jonson was seldom used in previous foundings. A small cadre of veterans from the Angels of Vengeance were given the honour training them, including the now infamous Interrogator-Chaplain Salvius. They started relatively small in strength, comprising of only a company of marines supplied with a modest amount of equipment, including the strike cruiser Emperor’s Retribution.

I think that you've got a really cool chapter name and colour scheme so good job on that :mellow:

 

Also have you ever heard of the Cambridge Latin Course? (A chap called Salvius is the main bad guy in those stories XD)

 

I think that the way you've got the organisation set out is fine but i have a question: so the ravenwing are the fast guys who respond to threats and search for baddies and the deathwing stay at home polishing their armour and being veterans?

 

oh and i bet theres gonna have to be a load of techmarines in the ravenwing for when their bikes break down

Had time to do a quick edit :(
I
t was in 000.M38, during the 23rd founding, that the Dire Wolves were created. Due to losses of Chapters in the preceding millennia, Segmentum Pacificus was left dangerously undermined. Thus, it was that the Dire Wolves were founded, with the sole purpose of reinforcing the Segmentum….

 

Permission was given for gene-seed to be used from the Angels of Vengeance, as it was alleged to be the most stable gene-seed available at the time. But the true reasons are surrounded by rumour and conjecture as the gene-seed from Lion El'Jonson was seldom used in previous foundings. A small cadre of veterans from the Angels of Vengeance were given the honour training them, including the now infamous Interrogator-Chaplain Salvius. They started relatively small in strength, comprising of only a company of marines supplied with a modest amount of equipment, including the strike cruiser Emperor’s Retribution.

The dropcap "I" looks silly. Try something like:

 

I
n the latter part of M37, the Imperium was still reeling from the consequences of the Age of Apostasy, the deep scars which will never truly heal. One of such scars were the losses of Chapters of Adeptus Astartes, which led to sorry state of Imperial Might through the Segmentae. To counter the increasing activity of foul xenos and heretic alike, the 23rd Founding has taken place. Created from the gene-seed of the 1st Legion, the Dire Wolves were sent to bolster the defences of Segmentum Pacificus.

 

Although the gene-seed of Lion El'Jonson was seldom used in previous foundings, the Angels of Vengeance has proven themselves pure and loyal....

 

If the mystery is not foreshadowing of something to come, then it's rather unneccesary.

 

Cheers, NightrawenII.

Edited by NightrawenII
I think that you've got a really cool chapter name and colour scheme so good job on that :D

 

Also have you ever heard of the Cambridge Latin Course? (A chap called Salvius is the main bad guy in those stories XD)

 

I think that the way you've got the organisation set out is fine but i have a question: so the ravenwing are the fast guys who respond to threats and search for baddies and the deathwing stay at home polishing their armour and being veterans?

 

oh and i bet theres gonna have to be a load of techmarines in the ravenwing for when their bikes break down

 

 

Thanks :D

 

I’ve heard of Cambridge Latin Course never read it <_< , just seen the name reading a history book and like the sound of it. Gaius Salvius Liberalis was a real Roman aristocrat and general, who held civil office in Britain.

 

 

The only threat and baddies the ravenwing respond to is the Fallen, Its sort of their responsibility, the rest of the time they support the chapter. The death wing are obsessed with leading the crusade, which was given to them by Lion El'Jonson through Salvius visions. This basicly makes them berzerkers in TDA, so currently they sound just like the veterans, until I can think of a better way to describe them ;)

 

 

 

@NightrawenII:

 

Thanks mate that helped a lot, when I get some time I’ll write something similar. ^_^

?The arrogant Eldar run like rats, the ground hot beneath their feet. Destroy their tanks. Shoot down their ships. Don?t allow a single Xeno escape retribution.? Interrogator-Chaplain Salvius.

 

Come up with something more general than that; its too specific and doesn't really show what the chapter are about.

 

But it is alleged to be part of an ongoing test of purity within the Inquisition.

 

Don't begin a sentence with a conjunction outside speech unless you are trying to sound deliberately dry. Which you are clearly not here.

 

Beliefs:

 

This section needs work. Their actual creed is important, but not as much as defning a clear outlook for them; what do they think about things, why do they think this way?

 

Who are they?

?The arrogant Eldar run like rats, the ground hot beneath their feet. Destroy their tanks. Shoot down their ships. Don?t allow a single Xeno escape retribution.? Interrogator-Chaplain Salvius.

 

Come up with something more general than that; its too specific and doesn't really show what the chapter are about.

 

It was meant to be specific, one of their recruiting worlds got attacked by the Eldar, foreshadowing of something to come :P But I could always move it down and add something else here.

 

But it is alleged to be part of an ongoing test of purity within the Inquisition.

 

This bit is being changed :)

 

 

Beliefs:

 

This section needs work. Their actual creed is important, but not as much as defining a clear outlook for them; what do they think about things, why do they think this way?

 

Who are they?

 

Going to start on that as soon as I get time, still trying to improve the Origin section. :P

Edited by Banelord
C
enturies after the Age of Apostasy, the might of the Imperium was still dangerously undermined. The devastation caused across the Segmentae and the untold losses in Imperial resources, especially the destruction of several invaluable Chapters of Adeptus Astartes, the drastic increase of foul Xeno and heretic activity and the lose of countless systems has caused a massive shift in power. In the latter part of M37 the 23rd Founding had been created in order to restore stability. Crafted from the gene-seed of the 1st Legion, the Dire Wolves were sent to bolster the defences of Segmentum Pacificus.

 

Although the gene-seed of Lion El'Jonson was seldom used in previous foundings, the Angels of Vengeance has proven themselves pure and loyal. So, permission was given for their gene-seed to be used. A small cadre of veterans from the Angels of Vengeance were given the honour training them, including the now infamous Interrogator-Chaplain Salvius. They started relatively small in strength, comprising of only a company of marines supplied with a modest amount of equipment, including the strike cruiser Emperor

Edited by Banelord

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