Arez Posted July 9, 2011 Share Posted July 9, 2011 Nobody liked the joke? :huh: i think you've had to much ale.no more for you Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/231023-rise-of-the-wolf/page/2/#findComment-2814004 Share on other sites More sharing options...
commander alexander Posted July 9, 2011 Author Share Posted July 9, 2011 Yeah, it was terri-bad, so I removed it and actually finished writing the entry. Hope I didn't leave you hanging to long hendrik. Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/231023-rise-of-the-wolf/page/2/#findComment-2814031 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Forté Posted July 9, 2011 Share Posted July 9, 2011 Thank you for this. It's getting really engrossing. Got to say I like the Long Fangs part and keep the Thunderwolf too. Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/231023-rise-of-the-wolf/page/2/#findComment-2814104 Share on other sites More sharing options...
hendrik Posted July 9, 2011 Share Posted July 9, 2011 haha, an astartes singing! it so made me think of this singing at work Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/231023-rise-of-the-wolf/page/2/#findComment-2814149 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Warhorse47 Posted July 9, 2011 Share Posted July 9, 2011 The revision was MUCH better! Keep it up! Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/231023-rise-of-the-wolf/page/2/#findComment-2814230 Share on other sites More sharing options...
commander alexander Posted July 9, 2011 Author Share Posted July 9, 2011 haha, an astartes singing! it so made me think of this singing at work Ahahahahahhah ^_^ And thank you, I never intended on keeping the joke, I was just putting it in there to see If I could get a laugh. Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/231023-rise-of-the-wolf/page/2/#findComment-2814271 Share on other sites More sharing options...
hendrik Posted July 9, 2011 Share Posted July 9, 2011 haha, an astartes singing! it so made me think of this singing at work Ahahahahahhah ^_^ And thank you, I never intended on keeping the joke, I was just putting it in there to see If I could get a laugh. what was the joke, since i only read the revised story Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/231023-rise-of-the-wolf/page/2/#findComment-2814276 Share on other sites More sharing options...
commander alexander Posted July 9, 2011 Author Share Posted July 9, 2011 At the part were he started singing, I ended it with him singing this, ==Edit== Was it so bad it left you speechless? It really was a temporary joke, I was only going to leave it for a while then finish putting in the story, which I did. Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/231023-rise-of-the-wolf/page/2/#findComment-2814281 Share on other sites More sharing options...
hendrik Posted July 9, 2011 Share Posted July 9, 2011 as hendrik hears the tune out of a long and ancient past time before the unification of terra he sights heavely. "fill one more up mekboy, i'll need it" as he starts murmuring to himself sitting at the bar in the meadhall Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/231023-rise-of-the-wolf/page/2/#findComment-2814292 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Grimtooth Posted July 9, 2011 Share Posted July 9, 2011 Long Fang inclusion was pretty sweet. Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/231023-rise-of-the-wolf/page/2/#findComment-2814298 Share on other sites More sharing options...
commander alexander Posted July 9, 2011 Author Share Posted July 9, 2011 Believe me, the long fangs will be making more appearances, have no doubt. As for hendriks comment, nostalgia? I was expecting anything but nostalgia. Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/231023-rise-of-the-wolf/page/2/#findComment-2814303 Share on other sites More sharing options...
commander alexander Posted July 9, 2011 Author Share Posted July 9, 2011 Would anyone like to read more, or should I wait? And I just went through the whole thread again, not counting the posts with actual story entries,14 or 15 out of 36 now are mine. Can you say thread domination. Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/231023-rise-of-the-wolf/page/2/#findComment-2814521 Share on other sites More sharing options...
hendrik Posted July 9, 2011 Share Posted July 9, 2011 14 or 15 out of 36 now are mine. Can you say thread domination. who cares? a real wolf endures and pushes on! come on whelp! or we'll need to get that dress back! currently i really like how the story is going, it reminds me a bit of OID tale which was one of the best fan-fiction stories i've ever read so keep on writing lad <_< Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/231023-rise-of-the-wolf/page/2/#findComment-2814546 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Forté Posted July 9, 2011 Share Posted July 9, 2011 Don't forget....its had 551 views too. Keep going. It's good stuff. Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/231023-rise-of-the-wolf/page/2/#findComment-2814549 Share on other sites More sharing options...
commander alexander Posted July 9, 2011 Author Share Posted July 9, 2011 OID? <_< Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/231023-rise-of-the-wolf/page/2/#findComment-2814564 Share on other sites More sharing options...
hendrik Posted July 10, 2011 Share Posted July 10, 2011 ah whelp let me enlighten you in the ways of the fang. OID (OnlyInDeath) is a senior member here and a true teller of stories. here's a link to his masterwork which in the end consisted of 8 chapters! wolf scout by OnlyInDeath Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/231023-rise-of-the-wolf/page/2/#findComment-2814733 Share on other sites More sharing options...
commander alexander Posted July 10, 2011 Author Share Posted July 10, 2011 Böðvarr's boots slipped in the fine dust as a step collapsed beneath him, but he held fast and hauled himself back up by the sturdy railing. He had to leave Iron-hide outside, the building couldn't support his wieght, or hold his size. The building could hardly hold his own weight with him fighting in it. The stairs were cramped for his bulk, and trying to fight through them was dificult with his long hammer. He was reduced to using his bolter, and oly able to make short sweeps with his hammer. He had brought two of his cyberwolves with him though, and they proved invaluable to him in the close courters. One was Járni, his first wolf companion. He was once a fine Fenrisan wolf with iron-grey hair, but that body had been broken and rended many times. Now, only his brain and spine were left in the body of plasteel and ceramite that Böðvarr had made for him. Now that wolf was climbing the stairs right behind him. As he rounded the corner of the landing they came under fire. The first round hit his ankle and knocked him down to one knee. The next struck the left side of his helmet, wrenching his head back violently. The corrupted heavy bolter chatted away as it gutted one of the cyberwolves and blew apart the stairs behind him. One of the wolves leapt past him, charging up the stairs. Böðvarr started firing his bolter up the stairs, to by it a moments relief. He jumped up and charged when he heard them crash down and the growling. He tore off his helmet as he climbed. As he reached the landing he was shot in the shoulder point blank, the attacker was trying to hit his head. In the confines of the landing, he couldn't swing his hammer. He shoved it against the chaos marine, pinning him against the wall. Then shoved his bolters muzzle into the soft joint of the neck, and blew out its spine and the base of the skull. Járni was the wolf who had lept past. He had used his momentum, and the weight of the enemies gun to pin it to the ground, and thenproceeded to rip out the traiotrs throat. In the struggle though, his hind quarters had been blown off. "Wait here," Böðvarr said. The wolf merely let out a clipped whine, and dragged itself into a corner. He was an old friend, and he hated being useless. Böðvarr climbed the last few flights of stairs with silence and caution. He finally reached the landing at the top floor. A short ways off into that office floor, was the entrance onto the sevice stairs to the roof. Gathered around another pair of the Black Legion, was a group of dameons. Daemons of Khorne and Nurgle waited around the traitors, ready to swarm the wolves above and murder them. One of the traitor marines was loading a missile launcher, preparing to blow the door open. Böðvarr crept back around the corner and checked his gear. He had one magazine of bolter ammo left, and three grenades. Two were Frag grenades, the other Krak. He reloaded the bolter, and primed the grenades. He crept back around the corner and tossed the grenades, the krak at the marines, and the frags at the daemons. He ducked back behind the corner. When he heard the three sucseding blasts, he charged around the corner. The traitor marine with the missile launcher had red hot slag for a face. Most of the nurglings had been killed, and the few that remained burst under the bolters fire like hideous boils, spilling out pus and noxious gas. Here, there was enough room for him to weild his hammer, and he was glad for it when the daemons of khorne came rushing. He swung out in a sideways swing with all his might, pulverizing the chest of the first daemon he hit, before continuing into another, and sending it flying through an office wall. Letting the momentum carry him, he swung around in a near full circle. Then he changed the momnetums direction, and brought it down in a powerful downward swing. In a gory spray, he forced a daemons head through it's chest and ito its waist. But he had lost his momentum, and another daemon was charging. He could not loft the hammer to strike before it would run him through. His servo-arm, which had remained folded on his back, had opened up in the office space. It reached out across his back and siezed hold of the warp-things head, and with a quick wine of it's servos, the jaws 'popped' its head. The last traitor opened up with his bolter, and Böðvarr returned with his own. He strode across the room, when a bolter round hit his weakened armor on his ankle, and destroyed the flesh underneath. He grunted with pain, but he closed the gap and brought the hammer back down on its neck and shoulder. Silencing it. His blood was already clotting and sealing the wound, so he carried on. He limped up the stairs, and banged on the door. "Ari, you old dog! Are you there?" He heard something being moved around, and the door opened to a familiar face. "I'm glad you could make it," said Ari. Böðvarr grunted, and climbed through the hatch, and let out a quick whistle for Járni. He saw four other Long Fangs he knew, two with lascannons, the others with plasma cannons. All had been weapons he had seen to personally. Ari himself was merely armed with an old axe and a bolt pistol, but Böðvarr didn't doubt that Ari could hit a target at 100 meters with it. "Come, I need your help with something." Ari was leading him around a large environ control unit. Böðvarr already knew what it was, there had been six long fangs. He silently went to work removing the plasmacannon from the dead wolf, and attaching it with its power source to Ari. Járni pulled himself up the stairs just as the Iron Priest finished his work. He then attached a small homing beacon to the wolfs body, so the Wolf Priests could recover it later. "Look over the North edge," Ari said. "What?" "Just do it." Böðvarr crept over to the edge, and ducked back as the edge was strafed by las and autogun fire. Below them, some distance off, was a small hill were a group of cultists had gathered. There should have been other space wolves attacking from that position. He looked up confused. "Just gather your friend up there and get ready to jump." "I have a bad feeling about this, you wily old wolf." "Oh just hurry up and come along." Böðvarr gathered up Járni and put him over his shoulder, letting the servo-arm wrap around him. Ari looked around, "Ready?" everyone nodded their agreement. He reached into a pouch and pulled out a detonator, then flipped the switch. There was a dull thud, then the building shuddered and began to sway. It swayed back and forwarth, until leaned to far to the North to go back. When Böðvarr realised what was going on, he let out a whistle for Iron-hide. The building came crashing down, being heralded by a great cloud of dust. He heard the cries of the cultists silenced as it came crashing down upon them. "Now!" Ari shouted, and they all lept. The ground came rushing up to meet them, Böðvarr would not be able to land correctly with his stummp of a leg. Just before he met the ground, he slammed against the plastseel and adamentium body of Iron-hide. Iron-hide tried to run off the shock, but his servos strained, and his belly slammed the ground, it was so forcefull. The long fangs had curled up into balls as soon as their toes touched the ground, rolling to absorb the brunt of the force. They came down the backside of the hill like plasteel and ceramite wrecking balls. Ari and the others climbed back up on their feet, and shook off the dust. "If I didn't lnow any better, I would think you all a bunch of impersonating blood claws!" said Böðvarr flustered, "Bringing down a fifteen story building with yourselves still on it! And then proceeding to jump off of it!" "But you do know better," said Ari with a toothy grin," We have just been doing this a very long time." Well, I hope you all liked that, I spent a fair amount of time writing that today. Don't even say a word about grammatical errors, I don't have a wprd processor on this computer yet. Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/231023-rise-of-the-wolf/page/2/#findComment-2814744 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Forté Posted July 10, 2011 Share Posted July 10, 2011 Love it and won't utter the dreaded words....'spell check' :mellow: It's not about the polish but the content. Only one thing to say. Try to split into smaller paragraphs. Just makes for easier reading. Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/231023-rise-of-the-wolf/page/2/#findComment-2814751 Share on other sites More sharing options...
commander alexander Posted July 10, 2011 Author Share Posted July 10, 2011 Will do, but I'm about ready to pass out. It's 12:30 a.m. here. Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/231023-rise-of-the-wolf/page/2/#findComment-2814754 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Forté Posted July 10, 2011 Share Posted July 10, 2011 Will do, but I'm about ready to pass out. It's 12:30 a.m. here. Enjoy your we deserved sleep :mellow: Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/231023-rise-of-the-wolf/page/2/#findComment-2814758 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Warhorse47 Posted July 10, 2011 Share Posted July 10, 2011 Hope you rested well then ate well! Here's a big rack of Elk for you for the tale! Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/231023-rise-of-the-wolf/page/2/#findComment-2815114 Share on other sites More sharing options...
commander alexander Posted July 11, 2011 Author Share Posted July 11, 2011 :) Elk :P Oh, I love me some elk. Now we just need bear to make sausage and meat loaf. The rest for is for stew, steaks, and BBQ! Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/231023-rise-of-the-wolf/page/2/#findComment-2815255 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Arez Posted July 11, 2011 Share Posted July 11, 2011 :) Elk :P Oh, I love me some elk. Now we just need bear to make sausage and meat loaf. The rest for is for stew, stakes, and BBQ! I'll get youa bear if you get another tale up Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/231023-rise-of-the-wolf/page/2/#findComment-2815257 Share on other sites More sharing options...
commander alexander Posted July 11, 2011 Author Share Posted July 11, 2011 I still haven't edited the last bit. Plus, I'm still working out exactly whats going to happen next. Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/231023-rise-of-the-wolf/page/2/#findComment-2815259 Share on other sites More sharing options...
commander alexander Posted July 29, 2011 Author Share Posted July 29, 2011 Well, I've been doing some reading of the space wolf omnibus, should I do some writing now? I think so....... But I'm a little curious, what do you like most so far, and what do you like the least? :D Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/231023-rise-of-the-wolf/page/2/#findComment-2833112 Share on other sites More sharing options...
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