Once upon a time

[Mr Yellow]

Hello all, here's a first effort at the first chapter of what could be a fairly long story.

HOWEVER, I really want some objective criticism, my family seem to find this a somewhat alien concept. Anyway, if you are strong willed enough to read this I would ask you to leave a comment. I would really appreciate it, whether it be good or bad.

Basically, if it sucks I will take a hint and quite happily flush my pen down the bog and go back to painting. If you like it, there will be more story.

 

Also, if you can figure from my (what I consider to be subtle-ish) clues as to who and what this is about there will be cookies all round.

 

Anyway, enough gilding of the lilly, drumroll.................

 

A dim corridor echoes to a cacophony of noise. As it draws nearer the sound resolves into the rhythmic ‘clunk clunk clunk’ of ceramite on steel. A lume strip flickers into life, set off by the proximity of the sound’s origin, the pure white light reveals a long vaulted corridor with a blank stone wall set at the far end.

 

Into the light steps a giant clad in white chased with blue, these colours are mimicked by the twelve that walk in his shadow. Though there is also deep reds and black to be seen. The giant stops at the end of the tunnel, he raises his right hand clenched into a fist. The following twelve stop in two perfect, equal lines and stand in silence.

 

Suddenly the lume strip cuts out to be replaced by darkness save for small red dots of light that appear on the chest of each of the group. A loud grinding of gears and clanking of cogs opens up hidden alcoves on the sides of the walls revealing gleaming dark metal barrels ready to hail the group with a storm of death.

 

 

Two men stand at the centre of a large octagonal chamber, the whole floor is decorated with a mosaic outlining a labyrinth. An artificial sun high up in the arched roof bathed the room with light. The two are deep in converation.

 

One man is dressed opulently with expensive clothes hiding underneath a full length black overcoat.

‘As you well know Lord, times are dangerous. The imperium is suffering from another black crusade and is constantly beset by enemies from within.’

 

The second man stood much taller clad in armour plating, his voice was deep, when he spoke the smaller felt his diaphragm vibrate.

-‘I understand the need but I do not understand the need for subterfuge, it is an …..uncomfortable idea for me.’

 

‘I know but believe me the necessity is absolute. If other powers knew what we were doing they would try and bend it to serve their own agenda. Just trust that we all serve the emperor above all others.’

 

-‘I had no doubt but you of all people can forgive me for being…….inquisitive.?’

 

‘Indeed’ chuckled the smaller man, as he did so his overcoat shifted showing a glimpse of a jewel encrusted rosette.

 

Suddenly the armour clad of the two tensed and cocked his head appearing to be in deep thought.

 

‘They?….’

 

-‘Are coming?……….’ interjected the larger. ‘Indeed they are, I can hear their approach…..are you prepared?’

 

The shorter man nodded in affirmation and turned at the sound of a boom as the wall opened to reveal a giant clad in white chased with blue, his face hidden in shadow.

 

The giant stared at the wall ignoring the automated bolter aiming at him.

‘Open sesame’ he announced to the wall.

One of the group at his back coughed to stifle a snigger.

‘Silence Curio!’ barked the giant.

The chastised individual looked to his right, his face the picture of incredulity. His look was returned with a shrug by the man he was looking at.

The wall at the end of the tunnel cracked open along its centre to form a perfect doorway.

The giant sighed at the size of it and stooped to walk through the opening. As he passed through he caught his head.

‘Throne’s sake Gorius! I told you to make the door larger’

Gorius was clad in red, he did not respond in kind, instead a series of bleeps and mechanical clacks emitted from a speaker attached to his torso.

‘What did he say?’ asked the giant to the group at large.

Another man clad in red spoke next ‘My lord, he says that if you but adhered to the codex size for a marine you would fit through the door, Gorius offers you a pair of augmetics that would correct that flaw’

‘One day I will make the codex more flexible’ retorted the giant ‘now lets get this meeting over with’.

 

 

The giant stomped forwards into the room, after a moments hesitation his entourage followed through the door.

‘Wait here’ the giant ordered. He then walked towards the two men at the centre of the room but did so by walking an odd path going from left to right and round the far side of the two spectators before finally joining them.

 

He walked up to the larger of the two men and dropped to one knee, ‘Praetor’ he said reverently.

-‘Rise Ceres my brother, you know such shows are not necessary’

‘Of course Praetor, is that why I took the scenic route?’

-‘To remind you that the most obvious path is not the easiest’

‘Indeed Praetor’

=‘Ahem’

The two men looked at the third man, he cowered slightly under their stare. Ceres looked almost surprised that the smaller man was there.

=‘My lord, can we proceed with the business at hand?’

-‘Indeed we can. Ceres, this is inquisitor lord...’

=‘...Crescere,’ said the inquisitor, stretching out his hand to grasp that of Ceres in a warrior’s grip. ‘And you are Captain Antaeus, I have heard much of you.’

[Taranis]

So far so good. Looks great to me, and more will definitely be nice! :)

[Lord Exedore]

seconded!

[Dominicus]

Nicely done.

 

Praetors of Orpheus?n

[Mr Yellow]

Nicely done.

 

Praetors of Orpheus?n

 

Got it in one, was it easy to figure out?

 

I shall put pen to paper at some point this weekend and create some more literary fusion. It's all in my head at the moment.... Thanks for the encouragement chaps.

[Mr Yellow]

Here's the next installment. Fresh off the kepyad. There is more to this section but it is becoming longer than I had expected. Anyways, expect lots of speeling mistaks in this to go with along grammar poor. I will sort it when I go through the whole chapter (I suppose I should call it that). Let me know what you think.

 

 

Antaeus brought his sword down with a clinical stroke that cut his opponenet in two with disturbing ease.

'My lord'

Antaeus turned away from the wreckage of the third combat servitor he had destroyed to find his chief apothecary Vedius standing there.

-'Ah. Vedius, I assume it is time for this demonstration. Shall we.' Without waiting for a reply he headed for the door which automatically opened at his

approach, he slowed at the threshold and ducked slightly, the apothecary followed at a regular stride.

-'So what do are esteemed colleagues of the mechanicus have to show us today?'

'I have no idea my lord, the Magos Biologis has been short on detail, the others already await us in the auditorium'

A short walk led them both to the upper viewing tier of the auditorium, three floors of gallerys on top of each other that looked directly down on a

central circular area that was bare except for a large table. From the stains of old dried blood it was clear what this room was used for.

The gantrys were filled with the 50 marines that had joined Antaeus in leaving Beta Entebes those few weeks ago, bound for an unknown destination, knowing

only that they would be helping to form and train a new chapter.

They reached the balustrade and Antaeus braced himself against with his outstretched arms leaning forward to view the entire scene, as he did so the

Magos Biologis entered below, his characterstic shuffle, a side effect of his semi-augmented state, a familar site after weeks of being forced into each

others company.

-'It appears we are to now find out what is afoot'

Vedius chuckled at what had quickly become an in joke among the praetorians

 

The Magos was followed by a small procession of servitors, the first had a pneumatic ram attached to it, the next two had what was clearly an astartes

between them and they were guiding it into the room. Bringing up the rear was the Magos' lackey, a Genetor ordinatus. From what his chief techmarine had

told him, Antaeus knew that the Genetor's knowledge of ballistics was second to none.

The gathered marines had gone quiet at the appearance of the Magos but had begun muttering once the astartes had appeared.

Vedius tried but failed to hide his anxiety ' My lord is that an astartes' knowing full well it was.

-'I don't like this my friend' he said to Vedius, more loudly he called down to the Magos in a tone that was loaded with a warning 'Magos, you are not

in the company that allows you to treat an astarted as such, I suggest you explain yourself!'

 

The magos looked up, his augemented sensory systems had detected the sound's origin as from behind 20 meters away at an elevation of 12 meters. His head

rotated around to face the speaker, the lenses of his mechanical eyes whirred and clicked as they focussed, scanning in multiple spectra using facial

recognition to determine the speaker's name. Simultaneously the magos' brain had been analysing the speech patterns and had detected the implied threat

and had discounted it. In the event that the physical form was destroyed, the magos' personality and memeory had been backed up for installation into a

new chasis. In the 0.001 seconds it had taken the magos to compute this, the magos had already formed an approprite response. He waited another 0.864

seconds before responding, rapid communication was possible between members of the mechanicus in machine code but the primitive vocalisations of the

emperor's finest was slow and laboured. So much was wasted communicating this way.

'My Lord Antaeus, I am glad that you have arrived. Do not be concerned about this clone, it is intended to have the physioloical properties of an

astartes for the purposes of this demonstration, that is all the similarity exists.' considering his militant audience appeased he continued his

preparations.

 

The clone was led over to beside the table, a clacking noise emitted from the vox caster of the magos and the table disappeared into the floor.

The magos began 'I present Genetor Megaas, some of you have interfaced with him already.'

'Gentlemen..., magos' he bowed briefly to the audience and his senior in deference. 'As you have been made aware, this clone represents an astartes, or at

least its physiology. Unarmoured an astarted represent a fearsome opponent, able to withstand a damage that would kill a normal human.'

With a click ofhis fingers a servo skull that had been hoverving above him floated forward gently before firing a single stub round at the clone's chest.

An entry wound appreared and blood ran down the chest of the clone for a few moments before the specialised clotting agents in the blood stopped it.

'As you can see, the bullet does not penetrate the chest plate. It takes a lot of force to do so...' Another wave of his hand saw the servitor with the

pneumatic ram take up position in front of the clone. The souless eyes of the clone stared into the lifeless eyes of the servitor.

'Around 93,000 NEWTOFFS will crush the rib cage of a human' the ram shot forwards and smashed into the clone,it was thrown into the air and across the

room. It hit the wall and fell to the ground before getting up again. A round red mark quickly showing on his chest to denote the point of impact.

'To an astartes it does not, but a larger force will, the next impact will be at 200,000 NEWTOFFS' the clone had been led back to the centre of the room

with no difficulty. A second time the ram shot forward, the clone was sent flying again but there was a loud crack, like that of a dry twig snapping that

signified the collapse of rib cage.

'As we can see there are limits to how much force the skeletal system can withstand. This however is not enough to prevent most ballistic weapons from

penetrating' to illustrate these words the Genetor rose his right hand to the clone as it struggled to right itself, the characteristic bark of a bolt

round tore throught the air and penetrated the clones torso, a split second later it exploded. The marine's on the lower gantry had shielded themselves

but a small containment field had sprung into life to prevent shrapnel from spreading.

A fourth servitor entered and began to clean up the remains of the clone.

Genetor Maas turned to his audience 'This is not efficient, we can rebuild him, we have the technology.....'

Vedius spoke out at this 'What you speak of is heresy, we are made in the emperor's own image and bear the genetic leagacy of his own sons, we are the

pinncale of human evolution, how da....'

'Yet you augment your bodies with mechanical replacements, by simple use of the word augment you are admitting the weakness of flesh, flesh is weaker but

there are ways of improving astartes, it can....

'Silence' the word echoes round the room and all fell silent. 'Genetor, stop talking and make your point.'

'Of course my Lord' said Maas.

Two servitors disappeared from sight and returned bringing a second clone. The thump of the clone's feet echoed from outside the room, as it came into

view there was a collective intake of air. It was clearly astartes but larger.

Vedius leaned forward to get a better view of the second clone, the motors in his bionic eye working over time to focus, he looked to his side to check

Antaeus was still beside him. 'It can't be' he said with disbelief.

'It is' said Antaeus. With that he vaulted the balustrade and dropped to the floor. He landed down on one knee, poised, with both hands stretched out forwards

keeping him balanced. The tiles under his feet cracked from the force. Antaeus slowly lifted his head to look the Magos in the eye.

 

Dun Dun Dun!!!

[Mr Yellow]

Here's the second chunk missing from the last post, again fresh off the keyboard.

 

The Magos turned to look at Antaeus as he stood up and walked over to the second clone. His mechanical brain was busy working through the possible outcomes

of the next few moments. Gait analysis of the marine commander suggested a high level of cortsiol, combined with a slight constriction of his pupils the

magos knew that Antaeus' hipocampus was overstimulated. A very human emotion creeped into the few remaining human parts of the magos construction, exhibiting

a slight shiver in his leg. Unsure how to process the feeling the magos cut off circulation to the affected limb, he stored a note to replace it with a more

predictable bionic. Whilst the magos had been wrestling with the last vestiges of humanity, Antaeus had been inspecting the clone.

The magos quickly accessed the information on the clone and prepared to brief the looming marine 'As you can see, this clone is significantly larger than

its predecessor. With the help of Maas I have calculated that a few modifications to bone structure can generate a two fold increase in its resilience.

We have been unable to conduct a test to calibrate this ability properly yet as we are constructing a new ram however this servitor has been unable to

compromise the rib plate' said the magos indicating the servitor that had propelled the deceased clone across the auditorium.

 

Antaeus rounded on the magos, 'It's not a calendar girl in a guardsman's uplifting primer you cog infested rust bucket! If you can't see what's wrong with

it I will tear you limb from limb!' he growled.

The magos' machine brain was working overtime to assess the situation, paralysed by so many threads of thought it could not supply a response. The magos

was stood still not responding, a small amount of oil leaked from the vox grille.

'What's wrong, CAT got your tongue? Allow me to loosen it' with that Antaeus stepped forward and booted the magos' attending CAT into the wall where it

smashed into pieces. A servitor automatically started to clear it up. He grabbed the magos by the neck and lifted him into the air as if he were a child

and carried him over so the magos was face to face with the clone.

'Tell me you can see.'

The magos's mechanical brain was running at full speed, the whirring and clacking of the gears was audible in the near silence of the auditorium. Finally

he spoke 'It is just a clone my lord, now place me....'

'Look again, at its face' growled Antaeus, shaking the magos so hard that a few cogs fell from the magos' person.

The magos focussed all his eyes on the clone's face, he scanned it meticulously looking for flaws, for any reason to explain the astartes' irrational

behaviour. 'It is a perfect clone my lord, I see know faults with it'

'Yes it is a perfect clone, but why does it look like me?!' With that he dropped the magos who collapsed into a pile at his feet. 'This....thing will be

taken by my apthercarium for inspection, you will not argue or I will end you now. Vedius!' Antaeus called for his chief apothecary.

Vedius and his assistants began to lead off the clone to the marines dedicated section of the ship.

The magos finally found his voice 'You cannot take that, it belongs to the mechanicus.'

'Shut up' said Antaeus and with that he crushed the vox unit attached to the magos chest. 'I will come a find you later on, you had better have answers for

me.......and think on this: If you are lie to me, I will kill you. If I think you are lying to me, I will kill you. If I think you are holding anything

back, I will kill you. In fact, you will have to try very hard to stay alive.'

With that ANtaues headed to the door, he paused at the threshold and as a parting remark he said 'Don't forget to calculate that I have a half compay of

marines, this may be a mechanicus ship but only we know how to deliver the Emperor's judegment.' Antaeus ducked through the door and slammed it shut on his

way out.

 

C&C welcome chaps.

I have a couple more similar sized posts in mind for after this one, but then I will be a bit dry on where the story will go (if anywhere). So those of you who have read this may want to suggest where it will go when I reach that point.

[sword brethren]

i'm loving these, i request more!

 

SB

[Mr Yellow]

Cheers Sword Brethren. To be honest I had forgotten about this, I don't have much time at the moment to write more on this (40K ADD) but I have ideas in my head for where this will go so I will put more up when I can.

 

LM