Index Astartes: Astral Reavers

[Donkey Kong]

I've made a few more edits to the IA.

 

I'm trying to think of quotes. I imagine one of Caphon telling the first Astral Reavers how he will "guide them through the inferno." I could also imagine a Tenth Company Captain saying as Ace said, "I've always thought of them [Codex Astartes] as guidelines."

 

I went dredging for some inspiration for myself. This is the story of Caphon Derii accepting the task of raising a Chapter:

 

Caphon

I was born into an age when giants fell, a time when an empire was brought to its knees by the very men who built it. I have lived through the second great death and rebirth of humanity. I have survived the Great Scouring, and I have led warriors against the traitors who destroyed an empire so that it could never be rebuilt, even in a million lifetimes. I am a Space Marine, and I am nothing.

 

But, I am not dead. Yet.

 

“Caphon” The single word, my name, brings me back to reality as memories fade into nothingness. The room I'm in is bright, draped in the clean white livery that has become my own since the end of the Great Scouring, the Second Founding, and dawn of a new era. The walls are blank. Fitting, I think, but I chase the thought away. Things are still the same, and there is no new start, no clean slate.

 

The Chapter Master is kind to me. He is patient, waiting for my attention to leave his offer, the offer the High Lords of Terra have given the Chapter, and my lingering memories, and return to him. I do not know how long he has waited, and I am guilty for wasting his time, and, in all fairness, he is wasting his own with me. I look from the azure eagle behind him, where I have lost myself, to his face. He smiles, and continues. I sit and listen.

 

“This is a great honor, Brother.” Brother. It leaves a filthy taste in my mouth. It is a word I always hear, always embraced by my kin, but brotherhood has never comforted me. Not since the Heresy. Not since Calth. Although, I know it is no slight, and the Chapter Master is fair to me with those words. I am several centuries his senior, though neither of our bodies would show it. I nod. I understand the opportunity presented to me, but I am still reluctant to take it.

 

Sergeant Derii. That has always been my place. I have never left it since the Second Founding. Always Sergeant, never Captain, never Chapter Master, though I have lived and served under more Captains and Chapter Masters than I care to remember. There is little I care to remember now. I have remembered too much already. If only I could forget, but I don't, and part of me never wants to.

 

“Yes, Chapter Master, but I am not worthy of it” My words are weak now. I am a warrior, not an iterator. I am being given the power to tear the Eye of Terror asunder, and purge its denizens from this dimension and all others, with a thousand Space Marines prepared to complete my work even long after I'm gone, but I do not know if I have the will or the presence to tame it. I have never built, nor nurtured. I have only fought and killed and destroyed. He shakes his head, and puts his arm on my shoulder.

 

“You are far more worthy than any in this Chapter, Caphon. You deserve to be Chapter Master. This is your opportunity to do something more.” He watches me as my eyes drift from him back to the azure eagle. It envelops me and I begin to fade in its regal color again. He squeezes my shoulder, it is a gentle touch, and my eyes dart back to his.

 

“Caphon, you may think that they have broken you,” He is firm with me, scolding my reluctance, my pain, my fear, “but you have risen above that, and forged yourself into something even greater.” Greater? you are nothing. The devilish voice is drowned out by his. “You have had your hand in cleansing the galaxy. You have fought alongside Lord Roboute Gulliman himself. You have lived through the greatest turmoil the galaxy has ever seen, and will ever see again, and now it is time for you to lead the next generation.”

 

Me? The voice whines, you are no chapter master, you are no leader. I smother its voice with my own. “Thank you, Chapter Master. I will think on this.” The smile I give is forced as I rise and turn to leave the white room. I can think on this alone. I need to think on this alone. My steps comfort me. I am not dead, but I am still nothing.

 

“You have time yet, Caphon. Consider everything you can give back to the Imperium of Man. For Gulliman and for the Emperor.”

 

For Gulliman. For the Emperor. The words chase after me, and I respond, though I do not know if it is only in my mind, or a whisper so soft not even he could hear it,

 

“I will, Chapter Master.”

 

In my quarters, there walls are bright white, but there is nothing keeping me from remembrance. Right here, right now, there is nothing in the galaxy greater than this decision. The Great Scouring is over. Or, so they say. In my mind it never ends, and it never will. And you never want it to. But, I put that aside and close my eyes, and then the memories come.

 

We were neophytes, in the shipyards of Calth, when below us, the world was illuminated by unnatural flares. From the observation decks, we saw everything. These were Traitors, kin who paved a path to ruin, and led a war against their brothers, fighting to keep us from saving the Emperor. Terra. Humanity itself. And we were powerless because we were neophytes. I was powerless because I was a neophyte. I was nothing, and after a thousand years of war that has never changed.

 

When power came to me then, I embraced it. Regal blue was soon bathed in red. The Great Scouring was a reclamation, and for me it was so much more. It was relief. It was inner peace that could only come from weathering the unbearable storm. Treachery paid in blood for all the blood spilled. Lives for all the lives taken. Everything for the Emperor, forever bound to the Golden Throne. Ultramarines. We took back the galaxy, but it would never be the same. The white armor proved it well enough.

 

Even after, when we were divided, the blood toll was not paid. The Great Scouring had whet its apatite, my thirst, and it would never end, not until every traitor had paid for the destruction they had caused. Blood stained white all the same. We were the watchers of the Eye, and I thought that would be my station until the blood toll was satisfied, or I could no longer collect it.

 

I will never forgive them. I will never forget their betrayal. Never forgive. Never forget.

 

These thoughts race through my mind. My hands are trembling. My eyes are shut tight to hold back tears that should never exist, and when I open them, I stare into the face of death, printed by my hand on my helm. My face. This was the face of rebirth. It has been mine since Calth. It was mine through the Great Scouring. It will be mine when I'm finally dead. This is the mark that shut them away in the Eye of Terror, and shut me away behind servos and ceramite. I have decided. This is the mark that will bind my brothers to me. It will embody everything they are. Servants of the Emperor. And nothing at all.

 

And nothing, nothing at all.

 

The core ideas are there if anyone could try and use this to think of a Caphon quote.

 

Overall:

Origins, probably a quote by Caphon

Homeworld, I like CJJ's idea of "We don't care where you come from."

Chapter Organization, Tenth Company on "guidelines"

Combat Doctrine, I'm not sure

Chapter Cult, something about either Faces or the Great Scouring, either one by a Chaplain

Gene-Seed and Battlecry, I'm not sure need quotes

 

Otherwise, I'm still open to criticism on every part of the IA.

[Brother Argent]

I will never forgive them. I will never forget their betrayal. Never forgive. Never forget

 

This works as a quote for me, for Origins perhaps. Maybe attribute as Caphon regarding the Traitors of the Great Scouring or something...

[Captain Juan Juarez]

Homeworld, I like CJJ's idea of "We don't care where you come from."

 

One of the ideas that I always like was that even though a Chapter may a homeworld, one with sufficient history would have recruitment rights to other worlds where they had operated before - maintaining Keeps in the same way that the Black Templars do, rather than a full fortress.

 

This can tie in well with the "We don't care..."

 

It's an idea that may bear looking at, as it offers a twist on "no homeworld".

[Donkey Kong]

I will never forgive them. I will never forget their betrayal. Never forgive. Never forget

 

This works as a quote for me, for Origins perhaps. Maybe attribute as Caphon regarding the Traitors of the Great Scouring or something...

 

Most of the lines in the story are Caphon's thoughts. Prior to actively deciding that he must open himself to lead, he's not very well spoken. I meant the story as a sort of inspiration for mindset, not to be stripped for quotes.

 

Homeworld, I like CJJ's idea of "We don't care where you come from."

 

One of the ideas that I always like was that even though a Chapter may a homeworld, one with sufficient history would have recruitment rights to other worlds where they had operated before - maintaining Keeps in the same way that the Black Templars do, rather than a full fortress.

 

This can tie in well with the "We don't care..."

 

It's an idea that may bear looking at, as it offers a twist on "no homeworld".

 

CJJ, I already do that:

 

Recruits are drawn from a number of worlds through the construction and maintenance of fortresses known as Keeps.

[Captain Juan Juarez]

Homeworld, I like CJJ's idea of "We don't care where you come from."

 

One of the ideas that I always like was that even though a Chapter may a homeworld, one with sufficient history would have recruitment rights to other worlds where they had operated before - maintaining Keeps in the same way that the Black Templars do, rather than a full fortress.

 

This can tie in well with the "We don't care..."

 

It's an idea that may bear looking at, as it offers a twist on "no homeworld".

 

CJJ, I already do that:

 

Recruits are drawn from a number of worlds through the construction and maintenance of fortresses known as Keeps.

 

One day, I'll read and not miss such crucial details... I imagine I'll never see the chainswordsaw that kills me.

[Donkey Kong]

I've made a few more edits to the overall Index Astartes.

 

Just some of my own commentary:

I've noticed that the Kraken helmets have been dropped completely from the IA, and I guess that was a conscious decision. The helmets are not as unique as they were in earlier versions of the chapter, although they are still in use. For those seeing the Astral Reavers for the first time, the Chapter Master and all ten Captains wear helmets crafted to resemble Lokhir Fellheart's Helm of the Kraken

 

I've been thinking about several other worlds to add to the IA through sidebars, however I don't know whether or not this idea would work particularly well, especially if they don't have any greater significance than just being there. These ideas include hive worlds, death worlds, and even a Japanese themed Tuchanka that I've allured to in this thread before.

 

I'd like to make a point in the battlecry about the silence existing because there is no point in explaining something that is already justified. I just don't know how exactly to fit it in.

 

I'm still looking for a title. "Executors of the Emperor's Will" is a no-no.

 

Finally, I have some ideas for quotes:

Origins

“I will mold you in battle. I will temper you in war.” Chapter Master Caphon Derii, Astral Reavers

Homeworld

“I do not care what world bore you, or how you came to my fleet. I will make a Reaver out of you, or you will die trying.”

Chapter Organization

“I've always seen them [Codex Astartes] more as 'guidelines' than actual rules.” Captain [], Astral Reavers Tenth Company

Combat Doctrine

“Swing! Parry! Pass! Lunge! Give no step! Yield no quarter! This is how we fight!”

Chapter Cult

“We are the faces of a hundred thousand monsters, and we are greater than a million more.”

 

I'm not sure if the Gene-Seed and Battlecry sections need a quote, albeit it would be hypocritical of me not to have them considering how I've called people out on quotes being an “all or nothing” business in the past.

 

Any comments are more than welcome. Thanks.

[Ace Debonair]

Venerable Caphon, nearly as old as the Imperium itself, was brought into the galaxy at the premature close of the Great Crusade. A neophyte of the Ultramarine Legion during Loregar's attack on Calth, Caphon witnessed the death of his home world, powerless to fight the Word Bearers. Traumatized, Caphon isolated himself behind the servos and ceramite his armor, watching as the Imperium tore itself asunder. Lifeless eyes saw the deaths of countless heroes, and cosigned the lives of their murderers. A skull faced automaton by the time of the Great Scouring, Caphon rebuilt the Imperium as only humanity could, twice sealing the traitors and their abominations beyond the Cadian Gate, within the Eye of Terror.

Complimenting their combat doctrine, and matching the viod they rule, Astral Reavers march to war in silence.

 

Damnable Typos.

The crusade continues. ^_^

 

I'm still looking for a title. "Executors of the Emperor's Will" is a no-no.

A title for what?

 

You asked me for quote ideas a little while ago; here's what I came up with.

 

Origins:

"We will be as a thousand burning torches against the darkness, heralding the annihilation of heresy!" - Chapter Master Caphon Derii, Astral Reavers

(Actually between you and me I like your one better for origins, but I might as well throw that out there)

 

Homeworld:

"Three recruits? Three? Either this is a worthy world indeed, or the Chaplain's standards are slipping." - Apothecary Garic Jut, Astral Reavers Tenth Company.

 

Organisation:

"I've always felt Guilliman intended his words less as laws and more as guidelines." - Captain Luca Jarro, Astral Reavers Tenth Company.

 

Combat Doctrine:

"I am familiar with the doctrines of Space Marine combat, but seldom have I seen them carried out with such swift, brutal ferocity." - Inquisitor Morgan Stark, Ordo Hereticus.

 

Chapter Cult:

"Few things are more satisfying in life than the look of absolute fear on the face of a heretic as he realises just how he is going to die." - Chaplain Kavius Glenn, Astral Reavers Second Company.

 

Geneseed:

"Though we may come from different worlds, these men are all my brothers, from now until the end of days." - Sergeant Ral Tunasi, Astral Reavers Eighth Company.

 

Battlecry:

"Let them howl their pitiful defiance. Maintain your focus, brothers, and this battle will be brief." - Chapter Master Caphon Derii, Astral Reavers.

 

 

Sorry about the delay. You know how it is! ;)

[Donkey Kong]

Damnable Typos.

The crusade continues. ^_^

 

Nice catch.

 

A title for what?

 

Well, to quote Batman:

 

The Title

GW IAs have a lot of things to teach the aspiring IA writer. One of the most easily overlooked is that the title of an IA is virtually never simply Index Astartes: [Chapter Name]. There's almost always some nice, evocative title like “The Lost and the Damned” (Death Guard), “Masters of Forbidden Knowledge” (The Thousand Sons), “Promethean Warriors” (the Salamanders), or “Warriors of Ultramar” (three guesses). The Chapter's name is still used as a subtitle, but this is a good place to demonstrate the pronounced aspects of the Chapter's character in a simple concept. All of the aforementioned clearly and effectively demonstrate much of the appropriate Chapter's character in a few words. Some chapters just use their chapter name, of course, but a lot have these phrases as titles.

 

Note that your thread or article title should most definitely be some variant of Index Astartes: [Chapter Name]. Keeps things simple and clear. But the title within the article itself (and possibly the Librarium article subtitle, when you get that far) both lend themselves to something like the old GW IA titles. It is by no means a requirement, but it is always nice to see.

 

It's not necessary, but it's just another touch.

 

 

You asked me for quote ideas a little while ago; here's what I came up with.

 

Origins:

"We will be as a thousand burning torches against the darkness, heralding the annihilation of heresy!" - Chapter Master Caphon Derii, Astral Reavers

(Actually between you and me I like your one better for origins, but I might as well throw that out there)

 

Homeworld:

"Three recruits? Three? Either this is a worthy world indeed, or the Chaplain's standards are slipping." - Apothecary Garic Jut, Astral Reavers Tenth Company.

 

Organisation:

"I've always felt Guilliman intended his words less as laws and more as guidelines." - Captain Luca Jarro, Astral Reavers Tenth Company.

 

Combat Doctrine:

"I am familiar with the doctrines of Space Marine combat, but seldom have I seen them carried out with such swift, brutal ferocity." - Inquisitor Morgan Stark, Ordo Hereticus.

 

Chapter Cult:

"Few things are more satisfying in life than the look of absolute fear on the face of a heretic as he realises just how he is going to die." - Chaplain Kavius Glenn, Astral Reavers Second Company.

 

Geneseed:

"Though we may come from different worlds, these men are all my brothers, from now until the end of days." - Sergeant Ral Tunasi, Astral Reavers Eighth Company.

 

Battlecry:

"Let them howl their pitiful defiance. Maintain your focus, brothers, and this battle will be brief." - Chapter Master Caphon Derii, Astral Reavers.

 

Thanks, Ace! I like a lot of them. I don't think I get the Homeworld one, though ^_^ .

 

Sorry about the delay. You know how it is! :)

 

Hey, in Liber time, it's only been a few minutes :D .

[Ace Debonair]

Thanks, Ace! I like a lot of them. I don't think I get the Homeworld one, though ^_^ .

 

It's meant to allude to the recruitment trials of the Astral Reavers being almost unfairly difficult.

Although in fairness I'm blindly assuming that A] a Chaplain is responsible for the recruitment in the first place, and B], the accepted recruits are given the geneseed almost as soon as the Chapter leaves whatever world the recruits are garnered from.

 

It struck me as a good idea at the time, but I can have a bash at another one if you prefer. :D

 

Sorry about the delay. You know how it is! :)

Hey, in Liber time, it's only been a few minutes ;) .

 

Already? ^_^

[Donkey Kong]

Thanks Ace. But, I think I've worked out the quotes pretty well using your material with a bit of my own spin.

 

Taking some inspiration from you, I've decided to just regularly update the OP. It probably makes it easier for newcomers as well.

 

The IA is still insultingly short, only about three pages, even with cheats formatting.

 

One idea I've been mentioning is adding other keep worlds through sidebars. The only problem is either coming up with significance or just ideas. I've been alluding to one quite a bit to no avail:

 

I could imagine a more Caribbean world, albeit Uft'ni is relatively Mediterranean inspired with a tribal sort of name (I thought it sounded relatively Hawaiian). Although, I'm imagining Hive Worlds (gangers and the like), Death Worlds (tribal headhunters), and worlds that are more Asian inspired (however much I may be treading on the White Scars' turf). Japan as opposed to Mongolian, I think. I wonder if I could get away with taking Japanese themes and sticking them on Tuchanka.

 

I'm still surprised that no one caught my joke about a Japanese Cultured Tuchanka as a recruiting world, or at least haven't called me out on it.

 

I've been thinking about several other worlds to add to the IA through sidebars, however I don't know whether or not this idea would work particularly well, especially if they don't have any greater significance than just being there. These ideas include hive worlds, death worlds, and even a Japanese themed Tuchanka that I've allured to in this thread before.

 

Either way, having more world ideas would give me some more room to work with names.

 

Both the gene-seed and battlecry sections can and probably should be expanded. Otherwise, is there anything that anyone believes needs more detail, explaining, or even reworking? I'm open to suggestions.

[Ace Debonair]

Thanks Ace. But, I think I've worked out the quotes pretty well using your material with a bit of my own spin.

 

Taking some inspiration from you, I've decided to just regularly update the OP. It probably makes it easier for newcomers as well.

 

Fair play. In the interest of continuing the crusade against typos, the Organisation quote has the word 'indended' rather than 'intended', and the battlecry one is missing a full stop at the end. ;)

 

It's more fair to keep the first post updated than it is to expect someone to read each and every post, I've always felt. Hopefully your new approach will help prevent people commenting on old sections, like I've very nearly done more than once. :P

 

The IA is still insultingly short, only about three pages, even with cheats formatting.

 

One idea I've been mentioning is adding other keep worlds through sidebars. The only problem is either coming up with significance or just ideas. I've been alluding to one quite a bit to no avail:

 

The problem is why any of those worlds would be important enough to get a sidebar of their own, rather than just a passing mention in the Homeworld section.

 

I haven't called you out on the japanese-tuchanka thing because it was GHY who was the mass effect nut, not me.

To be honest, I don't really have any opinion on the idea because the devil's in the execution rather than the concept. Balancing elements from a real culture, a fictional culture from a different universe, and a traditional 40k homeworld is quite the tricky ideal.

 

I'm also wondering if you plan to reserve a sidebar for the Nuviath Campaign, actually.

That's one of the reasons why the IK have no sidebars right now.

 

Admittedly, this means sidebars might be some time in the making, because I can no longer even remember who we're campaigning against. :lol:

Did we change it from eldar to chaos in the end?

[Donkey Kong]

Thanks Ace, the errors have been fixed.

 

The thing about worlds is more for a source of names. To use your idea as a counterexample, the Reavers don't "take 3 recruits" from a world, and move on. Reavers set up Chapter Keeps and use the worlds as regular stations. It's sort of ironic considering the trophy taking, but Reavers don't like to scavenge. Scavenging is weakness. It shows that you're not prepared. Reavers take. They don't scavenge for trophies, they take them. They don't make stops on worlds, they take them. In all fairness, I can just use the Imperial Fist methodology and have names with extremely diverse sources, including European, Asian, and African origins.

 

I do not intend on including a sidebar about Nuviath, because I do not particularly believe that it is an important campaign beyond the claiming of a new recruiting world. On that note, it would fit fairly well within the homeworld section as an example of how Reavers take.

 

I can't exactly say what we changed considering how I just stopped working on it, but I think, right now, I prefer Chaos to Eldar.

 

The Reavers and Infinity Knights have many points where they collide. It makes the brotherhood formed in the campaign that much more enjoyable. When I have some more free time, I'll go back to my notes and outline Nuviath again. I do wonder how the two Chapters would leave. The Reavers claim a world that was invaded by Chaos as their own as a source of recruits, rewarding the loyalists and punishing the traitors. Reavers may invite the Knights to utilize their keep as well. What do you think the response from your Knights would be?

[Ace Debonair]

Thanks Ace, the errors have been fixed.

 

The thing about worlds is more for a source of names. To use your idea as a counterexample, the Reavers don't "take 3 recruits" from a world, and move on. Reavers set up Chapter Keeps and use the worlds as regular stations. It's sort of ironic considering the trophy taking, but Reavers don't like to scavenge. Scavenging is weakness. It shows that you're not prepared. Reavers take. They don't scavenge for trophies, they take them. They don't make stops on worlds, they take them. In all fairness, I can just use the Imperial Fist methodology and have names with extremely diverse sources, including European, Asian, and African origins.

 

Sure, why not. There's nothing saying each world you take has to have only one culture, anyway. :cuss

 

I do not intend on including a sidebar about Nuviath, because I do not particularly believe that it is an important campaign beyond the claiming of a new recruiting world. On that note, it would fit fairly well within the homeworld section as an example of how Reavers take.

 

I can't exactly say what we changed considering how I just stopped working on it, but I think, right now, I prefer Chaos to Eldar.

 

Fair point, and fine by me. :D

 

 

The Reavers and Infinity Knights have many points where they collide. It makes the brotherhood formed in the campaign that much more enjoyable. When I have some more free time, I'll go back to my notes and outline Nuviath again. I do wonder how the two Chapters would leave. The Reavers claim a world that was invaded by Chaos as their own as a source of recruits, rewarding the loyalists and punishing the traitors. Reavers may invite the Knights to utilize their keep as well. What do you think the response from your Knights would be?

 

Well, provided the Reavers have no objection, then why not?

The recruits are basically brainwashed anyway, so they'd fit in just fine. :)

[Donkey Kong]

So, the Infinity Knights have no reservations sharing a recruiting ground with a Chapter even some of their radical members would call savages, that was also a traitorous world, and suffered a chaos incursion? Reavers may object too, when was the last time you met a pirate that liked to share? ;) !

[Ace Debonair]

So, the Infinity Knights have no reservations sharing a recruiting ground with a Chapter even some of their radical members would call savages, that was also a traitorous world, and suffered a chaos incursion? Reavers may object too, when was the last time you met a pirate that liked to share? :) !

 

But the IK'd just offer your pirates some rum. Then your lads would be drunk and generous enough to agree to share. ^_^

 

And no, the Infinity Knights would have no problem accepting recruits from a world if the recruits pass the rigorous screening tests and physical trials required to become a space marine, then survived long enough in the ad-hoc scout formation to be inducted into the 10th Company proper back at Ashar, up to a dozen war-filled years later. :)

 

Besides, the next time they return to Nuviath may well be a thousand years or more later, by which point whatever taint was there has probably been stamped out very thoroughly given that the Astral Reavers are keeping one eye on the place. :)

[Shinzaren]

“I will mold you in battle. I will temper you in war.” - Chapter Master Caphon Derii, Astral Reavers

This is good quote for the gene-seed or homeworld I think. The first quote really sets the tone for the whole article, so perhaps something more piratey? Ace is really good with the quotes, while I am horrible... :D

 

Venerable Caphon, nearly as old as the Imperium itself, was brought into the galaxy at the premature close of the Great Crusade. A neophyte of the Ultramarine Legion during the Word Bearers' attack on Calth, Caphon witnessed the death of his home world, powerless to fight the Word Bearers. Traumatized by his loss, Caphon isolated himself behind the his armor, watching as the Imperium tore itself asunder. Lifeless eyes saw the deaths of countless brothers, and cosigned the lives of their murderers. A skull faced automaton by the time of the Great Scouring, Caphon rebuilt the Imperium, twice sealing the traitors and their abominations beyond the Cadian Gate, within the Eye of Terror.

This is great because it offers the first glimpse into the Void Cold soul of Caphon. Perhaps expand a bit on how his exploits during the Scouring and the Heresy, as well as detailing what made him such an excellent choice to lead a 3rd founding chapter?

 

In nearly a thousand years of service, Caphon never left his position in the Veteran Companies of the Ultramarines nor the White Consuls. A leader in crisis alone, he saw his brothers through the maelstrom of combat across countless worlds, when his superiors no longer could. Coerced by his brothers into accepting the High Lords' invitation, Caphon reluctantly pledged to honor both the Chapter and Imperium.

Same as above. Extrapolate more on what he did become worthy of this great honor. Explain a bit more about he molded the chapter to suit his icy cold personality.

 

Caphon gave his newfound brothers purpose, just as they had given it to him. They would be the Emperor's instruments, The reclaimers of His domain. Just as He had forged the Space Marines in the fires of war, Caphon would lead the fledgling Chapter through the greatest inferno he had ever known. The Great Scouring would be rekindled by a single hand, and a thousand more would fuel the flame. Caphon's Eternal Purge would ignite a legacy that has lasted ten thousand years.

Again, more expansion here. Perhaps detail a few early engagements, nothing blow-by-blow, but broad overviews of why they are fleet based and pirate like? Go into detail about their earliest days and explore how they came to be who they are now?

 

Homeworld

“I do not care what loathsome world bore you, or how you came to my fleet. I will make a Reaver of you, or you will die trying.” -

Now this is the perfect quote in the perfect place.

 

T

o carry out their Eternal Purge, Caphon's Astral Reavers went against the traditions of the Legions and based themselves within their mighty fleets. The Chapter's flagship, the Nausicaä, is a venerable vessel that has served the Imperium since the early days of the Great Crusade. Once a part of Battlefleet Solar, She was heavily damaged during Horus' drive towards Terra, and removed from active service. Refitted by the Martian Mechanicus at Caphon's request for a crusade worthy fleet, the Nausicaä was gifted to the Astral Reavers at their founding alongside a half dozen other vessels. Thrice the size of a traditional Battle Barge, She serves as the Chapter's spiritual home, their Fortress-Monastery, and within Her hull lie the Chapter's greatest treasures.

Why? Why pick an old inactive vessel and go fleet based, rather than stay with tradition and take a world/system? This is a great place to expand and explain why they are all piratey and ship bound.

 

Astral Reavers regularly bolster their flotillas by capturing enemy craft, and trading their spoils of war with the Adeptus Mechanicus in exchange for repairs for their own vessels and new cruisers and escorts. On special occasions, the Astral Reavers request certain ships they capture be refitted, commemorating hard fought battles, and those lost in claiming them. These newly acquired craft often join forward fleets, allowing damaged vessels to fall back and repair at the Chapter's Keep worlds. Ships are frequently rotated between crusading and reserve fleets, appeasing both the mighty vessels' machine spirits and their serf crews.

Why? Astartes are provided with everything they need to make war. Perhaps in early engagements they lost vessels and replaced them with the captured ships of their enemies, starting a practice that continues? Expand on why they do something not many other chapters do. This is your unique selling point. You're a pirate. Go into more depth and detail about why you are a pirate. Perhaps Caphon thought the traitors were undeserving of the vessels/treasures and so he constantly reclaims them for his Emperor?

 

Recruits are drawn from a number of worlds through the construction and maintenance of fortresses known as Keeps. Uft'ni was the first world to construct an Astral Reaver Keep, and the only Keep constructed under Derii's command. For a time, it was the Chapter's only home outside of their flotilla, and its people have left their everlasting mark on the Chapter. Derii came to this world in hopes of refitting his forces before continuing his Eternal Purge. However, the Uft'ni fascinated him with a history not unlike his own: During the Horus Heresy Uft'ni was prepared as a bulwark against Horus' advance. Relentless combat ruined the world, and left Imperial forces in shambles. With the ever looming threat of defeat, the decision came to bombard the world's ice caps from orbit, and drown it. Only the tallest mountains and spires of its greatest city hives escaped the rising waters, while untold trillions, Uft'ni and heretic alike, were lost beneath the surface.

Coooooooollll :P Great explanation for the ocean world. Love the idea of the flooded planet.

 

Chapter Organization

“I've always felt that Gulliman intended his words to be interpreted less as laws, and more as … guidelines.” -Captain Calico Kaj, Astral Reavers Tenth Company

And somewhere, Keith Richard's guitar string breaks in agitation :P

 

A

child of Calth, and veteran of the White Consuls, Caphon Derii formed his Chapter as his gene-father, Roboute Gulliman, would have wanted. In accordance with the Codex Astartes, Caphon's Astral Reavers would have ten companies, and a thousand battle ready Space Marines between them. He would shun neither psyker nor Reclusiarch, and he would allow the Adeptus Mechanicus to train his brothers in their most sacred art.

Yet he went against Gulliman and became piratey and fleet based. Perhaps explain what lead him to break from tradition?

 

Why is seconding your Veterans to the 10th co. a slight on the Codex? Aren't the Veteran Sergeants of most 10th companies made of the finest warriors in the chapter, to better mold the new charges?

 

Combat Doctrine

“Swing! Parry! Pass! Lunge! Give no step! Yield no quarter! This is how we fight!”

It would be cool to see this made into a rhyme or sing-song, like an old time pirate shanty. I dunno if that's possible, but I think it would be really neat and piratey.

 

As a necessity of protecting their mighty fleets, the Astral Reavers have become adepts of voidborne combat. Commanders relish in leading lightning assaults on their foes, dividing their forces to deliver attack from multiple fronts. Their opponents are given no quarter, incapable of retaliating or retreating before one host disappears and another strikes. Trapped vessels are regularly boarded and captured. Fighting in the cramped spaces of enemy vessels, Astral Reavers are conditioned to excel in close quarters combat.

Perhaps they have adapted their Battle Barges and Cruisers to reflect this? Instead of ship-killing weapons, they have replaced some of their killing armament with extra boarding torpedo launchers, magnetic grapples, and extra launch bays? Sturdier construction as well? Less about destroying the enemies from space, more about slaying them inside their own vessels? Possible area of expansion?

 

Chapter Cult

“Mine is the face of a hundred monsters. But, I am mightier still.” -

This is great!

 

The Changing of Faces is a practice whose origins can be traced back to the Chapter's founding. The skull mark worn by every battle brother, originally adopted from Derii's own remembrance of Calth, was the first heraldry to ever unify the Astral Reavers as a Chapter. However, the passage of time has transformed the face into a mark of the individual and a ritual of growth, as Chaplains began to interpret Caphon's own adoption of the face of the beast as his own rebirth. Every initiate, upon entering the Chapter, earns his first face, a human skull, a symbol of everything the initiate is, and, synonymously, nothing at all. He is born again. In the ceremonies following battles, battle brothers who believe they have surpassed their previous achievements tell tales of their victories. Their feat is judged in the company of their brothers, and, if declared worthy, the skulls of their newly vanquished foes are fused with their old face to create the next.

Holy Crap that is cool. A little concerning however, if they are taking Chaos or Daemon skulls. I think Inquisitors might a worry a bit, seeing as that is a pretty potent bit of corruption?

 

Trophy taking has long coincided with the reclaimer mentality of Astral Reavers. Bones, trinkets, and relics are only a fraction of the gimcrack that brothers seize to bolster their worth and honor the Emperor. Trophies claimed from the battlefield are shared with the Chapter, and given to Reclusiarchs and Librarians to determine their worth. True treasures, Imperial relics and xeno technologies, earn their claimer praise and prestige. However, more often than not, they are rejected. These barbaric decorations often receive ill response from fellow Chapters of the Adeptus Astartes, declaring them worthless at best, and heretical at worst. Though these claims have never endangered the Chapter's relationship with the Imperium, they have created a gap between the Astral Reavers and humanity.

If a trophy is rejected, what then? Does the marine keep it and wear it? Or is it discarded in shame? It just drops off after you say they are rejected.

 

Together, these traditions have given the Astral Reavers a boastful swagger and flamboyance alien to many Chapters of the Adeptus Astartes. Astral Reavers are eager to share the tales of their exploits, telling all those willing to listen of battles they've fought and enemies they've slain over the centuries. The most fascinating tales find their way into the Chapter's Librarium, immortalizing battle brothers in the Lexicanums' retellings long after their deaths.

Are they arrogant and cocky? Or simply happy to boast about worthy kills? I would assume they would get along great with chapters like the Wolves of Fenris?

 

Gene-Seed

“Thogh we may come from different worlds, the same blood flows through us all. We are brothers, from now, until the end of days.” -

This is a good place for the quote at the beginning, though the one here works equally well.

 

L

ike a full two-thirds of Space Marine Chapters, the Astral Reavers can trace their genetic lineage back to the Thirteenth Primarch Roboute Gulliman and his Ultramarines. Possessing one of the oldest genetic samples in the Imperium, it comes at no surprise that their Gene-Seed is free of mutation.

Expand on this. Perhaps explain how they view their geneseed and their Primarch? What is their relation with Ultramar? Expand on how their... different practices have altered their relationship with the Codex and the Primarch? Do they have any unique recruiting practices that might help expand this?

 

 

Some thoughts for you KHK. A great read all the way through, and one which has definitely conveyed your theme very well. It was good the first time I read it, and it is still good now. Pirates forever! ARRRRGGGHHH!!!!! :P

[Donkey Kong]

So, the Infinity Knights have no reservations sharing a recruiting ground with a Chapter even some of their radical members would call savages, that was also a traitorous world, and suffered a chaos incursion? Reavers may object too, when was the last time you met a pirate that liked to share? :lol: !

 

But the IK'd just offer your pirates some rum. Then your lads would be drunk and generous enough to agree to share. :lol:

 

And no, the Infinity Knights would have no problem accepting recruits from a world if the recruits pass the rigorous screening tests and physical trials required to become a space marine, then survived long enough in the ad-hoc scout formation to be inducted into the 10th Company proper back at Ashar, up to a dozen war-filled years later. :lol:

 

Besides, the next time they return to Nuviath may well be a thousand years or more later, by which point whatever taint was there has probably been stamped out very thoroughly given that the Astral Reavers are keeping one eye on the place. ;)

 

Haha, Alright. Funny thing to say, in over five drafts of the Astral Reavers, I've never mentioned super-alcohol in any way, shape, or form. I'll keep it as something to add to the list.

 

Quite a post, Shinzaren, thanks for the response.

 

This is good quote for the gene-seed or homeworld I think. The first quote really sets the tone for the whole article, so perhaps something more piratey? Ace is really good with the quotes, while I am horrible... :P

 

Well, I'm open to suggestions :lol: .

 

This is great because it offers the first glimpse into the Void Cold soul of Caphon. Perhaps expand a bit on how his exploits during the Scouring and the Heresy, as well as detailing what made him such an excellent choice to lead a 3rd founding chapter?

 

Same as above. Extrapolate more on what he did become worthy of this great honor. Explain a bit more about he molded the chapter to suit his icy cold personality.

 

Again, more expansion here. Perhaps detail a few early engagements, nothing blow-by-blow, but broad overviews of why they are fleet based and pirate like? Go into detail about their earliest days and explore how they came to be who they are now?

 

The problem here is that I don't know what the Ultramarines did during any of these events. Under most circumstances, it's because they haven't been written yet. I have no doubt that I will be expanding this some more once I've read Abnett's Know No Fear. Other than that, the only things I can really think of involve name dropping the Iron Cage. The pirate like nature of the fleet is more of a leap off of the Black Templars and their Eternal Crusade. It's supposed to be interpreted as a sort of exact opposite, so, if the Eternal Crusade is the Great Crusade, then the Eternal Purge is the Great Scouring. Another thing that I was trying to get across over the IA was the Caphon's chapter changed quite a bit without his guidance to keep them in check. I'll point back to this later.

 

Why? Why pick an old inactive vessel and go fleet based, rather than stay with tradition and take a world/system? This is a great place to expand and explain why they are all piratey and ship bound.

 

Well, the obvious answer would be to appease the Nausicaa's Machine Spirit. Caphon is meant to be a broken character. Commissar Molotov once said that Caphon was "Broken Goods," whether from the Great Crusade or the Great Scouring. He's not as cold so much as vengeful, focused, and hell bent on making the traitors pay for robbing him of any glory he would have had in the Great Crusade. The ship bound setting comes from them being a crusading chapter. The pirate stuff starts later.

 

Why? Astartes are provided with everything they need to make war. Perhaps in early engagements they lost vessels and replaced them with the captured ships of their enemies, starting a practice that continues? Expand on why they do something not many other chapters do. This is your unique selling point. You're a pirate. Go into more depth and detail about why you are a pirate. Perhaps Caphon thought the traitors were undeserving of the vessels/treasures and so he constantly reclaims them for his Emperor?

 

I'll be sure to use this as a point to expand. The last question you had is already supposed to be there, but I'll be sure to clarify that, too.

 

Yet he went against Gulliman and became piratey and fleet based. Perhaps explain what lead him to break from tradition?

 

Fleet based, yes. They were not as piratey under Caphon. Caphon also took Uft'ni as a homeworld. They chapter becomes more divergent without Caphon, but even then they're a fairly codex chapter.

 

Why is seconding your Veterans to the 10th co. a slight on the Codex? Aren't the Veteran Sergeants of most 10th companies made of the finest warriors in the chapter, to better mold the new charges?

 

This is a matter of scale. If there are one hundred neophytes, then there are ten veterans to lead them. If there are one thousand neophytes, then there are one hundred veterans to lead them. I have no doubts in my mind that there are points in the chapter's history with well over one thousand neophytes.

 

It would be cool to see this made into a rhyme or sing-song, like an old time pirate shanty. I dunno if that's possible, but I think it would be really neat and piratey.

 

That line was meant to interpret a superior marine sparring with one of his brothers. "Swing" he takes a swing with his sword, and the learner ducks to avoid the blow. "Parry" he parries the learner's swing. "Pass" he takes a step forward, avoiding the blow and possibly rushing into the learner so that they stumble backwards. "Lunge" he takes another killing blow at the learner which the learner blocks only to fall backwards.

 

Perhaps they have adapted their Battle Barges and Cruisers to reflect this? Instead of ship-killing weapons, they have replaced some of their killing armament with extra boarding torpedo launchers, magnetic grapples, and extra launch bays? Sturdier construction as well? Less about destroying the enemies from space, more about slaying them inside their own vessels? Possible area of expansion?

 

Absolutely.

 

Holy Crap that is cool. A little concerning however, if they are taking Chaos or Daemon skulls. I think Inquisitors might a worry a bit, seeing as that is a pretty potent bit of corruption?

 

This one is always odd to explain. I can't rephrase it without becoming wordy. Basically, the first "mask" is a human skull, think Night Lords. Let's say the marine slays an Ork Nob, he'll take aspects of that Nob's face, whether he has large tusks, or even if he wore a helmet with large horns. If his victory is deemed worthy, his human skull will now have tusks or horns depending on his choice. This is the same regardless of whether it's an Eldar warrior, a Tyranid, or a Daemon. If they're threatening to an Inquisitor, they're a third founding chapter with more connections, power, and authority than that Inquisitor can dream of.

 

If a trophy is rejected, what then? Does the marine keep it and wear it? Or is it discarded in shame? It just drops off after you say they are rejected.

 

Nice catch. I think Reavers will know when trophies are trash anyway, that skull may be an awe inspiring trophy, but it has no other worth. Someone who finds some technology and thinks it valuable only to learn that it is trash will probably be ashamed and trash it. I'll be sure to expand on this.

 

Are they arrogant and cocky? Or simply happy to boast about worthy kills? I would assume they would get along great with chapters like the Wolves of Fenris?

 

That depends on the individual Reaver, however I think most are just happy to tell stories. I haven't really tried to make any connections with existing Chapters, but if I were to do it off the top of my head right now, probably good relations with the Space Wolves, Black Templars, and a blood kindred with the Ultramarines and their successors.

 

Expand on this. Perhaps explain how they view their geneseed and their Primarch? What is their relation with Ultramar? Expand on how their... different practices have altered their relationship with the Codex and the Primarch? Do they have any unique recruiting practices that might help expand this?

 

Gene-Seed has always been my least favorite section. I never knew what to write in it. Those are all good suggestions on how to expand it though.

[Donkey Kong]

Edits have been made to the OP.

[Ace Debonair]

“I will mold you in battle. I will temper you in war.” - Chapter Master Caphon Derii, Astral Reavers

This is good quote for the gene-seed or homeworld I think. The first quote really sets the tone for the whole article, so perhaps something more piratey? Ace is really good with the quotes, while I am horrible... :P

 

Way to put me on the spot, dude. <_<

It depends a lot on what you want the opening lines to convey, for example:

 

"A thousand roaring enemies await you, each consumed by crazed bloodlust. They do not know pain or fear. We will teach them both before we destroy them!"

(For highlight the brutal, get-stuck-in-there nature of the chapter)

 

"Every enemy of mankind I slay only serves to make me stronger."

(For the evolving skull-mask doohickey)

 

"I've fought ten thousand battles on a thousand worlds and faced down foes that could kill a man in the blink of an eye. I've killed them all, in the Emperor's name. And I'll kill ten times that number before my work is done."

(Because the Astral Reavers are just that badass ;) )

 

But truth be told, I actually quite like KHK's one. It's plain, blunt and to the point, which is how I pictured Caphon in the first place. :huh:

It fits the character it's attributed to, in other words.

 

 

 

EDIT:

I've got to go out now, but I'll have a looksie at the IA proper when I get back.

Watch this space, etc etc.

 

 

It is the reclamation of the galaxy, the Great Crusade that never wars, and the Great Scouring that never ended.

 

“Thogh we may come from different worlds, the same blood flows through us all. We are brothers, from now, until the end of days.” -

 

The other great crusade continues. B)

 

I couldn't find any glaring mistakes in sections new or old, so I'm settling for a bit of the old fashioned spelling/grammar nitpickery.

[Captain Juan Juarez]

“I will mold you in battle. I will temper you in war.” - Chapter Master Caphon Derii, Astral Reavers

This is good quote for the gene-seed or homeworld I think. The first quote really sets the tone for the whole article, so perhaps something more piratey? Ace is really good with the quotes, while I am horrible... :yes:

 

Shouldn't it be "mould" though? Or am I too tired?

[Heru]

“I will mold you in battle. I will temper you in war.” - Chapter Master Caphon Derii, Astral Reavers

This is good quote for the gene-seed or homeworld I think. The first quote really sets the tone for the whole article, so perhaps something more piratey? Ace is really good with the quotes, while I am horrible... <_<

 

Shouldn't it be "mould" though? Or am I too tired?

Both spellings mean the same thing.

[Donkey Kong]

Edits have been made to the OP. Any and all criticism is welcome. If anyone would like to suggest names for the quotes, I'd appreciate that too.

[Ace Debonair]

Edits have been made to the OP. Any and all criticism is welcome. If anyone would like to suggest names for the quotes, I'd appreciate that too.

 

I have no idea why 'Kings of Black Mar' is at the top of the IA.

 

Other than that, I can't find anything to pick on.

 

You need Names, eh? Well, you know me and names - I do my best work when blitzing out a whole bunch of 'em, so brace yourself:

 

Kaio, Orlan, Jukai, Nuran, Corth, Broka, Logrin, Malthec, Naar, Koro, Vark, Loks, Rigan

 

If you like any of those, feel free to use 'em!

[Donkey Kong]

'Kings of Black Mar' is my go at a title. Effectively it's Lords of Space, Kings being Lords, Black Mar meaning Black Ocean or Space. That's what happens when you let me name things by myself :P *

 

I'll update the IA with some of the names. I feel that Tenth Company is a little overused, so if you think any title can be changed and still suit the quote, I'd gladly hear it.

 

 

 

 

* :D

[Donkey Kong]

Edits have been made to the OP. Any commentary would be greatly appreciated.