The Ghost Knights

[Plaguecaster]

Here is my DIY renegade chapter dedicated to Nurgle this is my first attempt at a renegdae diy chapter so found it a bit hard any advice or ideas that could help it will be greatly appreciated

 

 

Battlecry

"Death walks with us"

 

Colour scheme and symbol. Colours I am planning to use are bleached bone, rotting flesh and Dheneb stone. The symbol will possibly be a tombstone with two crossed swords.

 

 

 

Origins and fall to Chaos

Once a proud and noble chapter the Ghost Knights before they turned traitor, were a crusading chapter who had a morbid obsession with death, founded during the 20th founding in order to patrol the edge of the Segmentum Pacificus. Their main goal was to prevent Dark Eldar or other pirates raiding Imperial Worlds, eventually they became dedicated to the extermination of all Xenos who they saw as abominations becoming masters of urban warfare and siegecraft. During the year 310.M37 they received a distress call a feudal world under attack from feral Orks, the Ghost Knights sent a small force led by Epistolary Michael to destroy the Orks. Unfortunately the Ork invasion was a distraction employed by Dark Eldar Raiders in order to capture slaves in secret, the strike force was wiped out after being ambushed with Michael being captured and tortured by a dark eldar haemoniculi. After losing contact with the strike force the Ghost Knights mobilized two companies to find out what happened to the strike force, arriving in the system before the Dark Eldar ship could escape. The Ghost Knights boarded the Dark Eldar ship killing every Eldar inside rescuing Epistolary Michael from the Haemoniculi. Despite harsh testing Michael was proven to be free of any taint though he now had a deep hatred of all Eldar and was willing to do anything to eradicate them once and for all no matter the cost. About 31 years later since being rescued Michael had risen to become Chief Librarian and led the 4th company to the Hive World of Posdav where a deadly plague had broken out making the planets inhabitants rebel against the imperium. During the siege of the Traitor Governors' palace Captain Gabriel of the 4th company was infected by the deadly plague when his arm was cut from the plague ridden Governor's power sword who was slain aftewards though the plague quickly reduced the captain's resilient body to a decayed carcass. Horrified at first how even the superhuman resilience of a space marine was not immune against the plague Michael then thought that if the plague was so deadly against a space marine then how deadly would it be against Xenos. After convincing the surviving members of the 4th company that the plague if weaponised could be used in their crusade against the foul Xenos to completely eradicate them, they collected as much infected specimens using servitors in an attempt to study and replicate the plague secretly in a bid to use it as a weapon against the Imperium's enemies.

 

 

 

After many unsuccessful attempts Michael was able to replicate the deadly plague making it even more deadlier and able to be used as a weapon, the test subject was the holy shrine world Silvana covered in vast cathedral cities which was suffering rebellion from Cultists and attacked by Dark Eldar raiders. Launching the created plague into the atmosphere through missiles the plague proved beyond expectations not only wiping out every last Dark Eldar but all life on the planet, unfortunately Inquisitor Volk a Puritian of the Ordo Hereticus leading a large Imperial fleet sent to defend the Shrine world. The Inquisitor was horrified at the genocide the Ghost Knights wantonly unleashed declaring them Excommunicate Traitoris to the imperium attacking the space marine fleet destroying a couple of their ships which had the first and most of the second company on them including chapter master Konrad as well as damaging the majority of the fleet. With just over half the Ghost Knights dead Michael became enraged at the attack on his chapter by their former allies calling on any God that would offer protection as well as the chance for vengeance, Nurgle heard the pleas from Michael choosing to help the Ghost Knights as their creation as well as spreading of plagues pleased the lord of decay greatly opening warp rifts right in the middle of the Imperial fleets ships from which vomited a tide of Nurgle Daemons which slaughtered the Inquisitors forces. Rallying behind Michael ( who claimed undisputed leadership of the chapter) and their Daemonic allies the Ghost Knights attacked the reeling Imperial fleet utterly destroying every last ship after a series of devastating boarding assaults with Michael personally slaying the Inquisitor himself. With the their victory the remaining Ghost Knights turned their backs on their former lives swearing allegiance to Nurgle becoming Plague Marines dedicated to spreading the plagues of Nurgle to all life both Xenos, the Ghost Knights led by Michael Alexander now Michael Vilepox entered the Eye of Terror where they rebuilt their strength allying themselves with the Traitor Legions (mainly the Death Guard, Word Bearers and Iron Warriors). During Gothic War they lead a small Plague fleet undetected into the Segmentum Pacificus in the Halo Zone where they claimed an abandoned pre-imperial world which they fortified with help from a band Iron Warriors as well as some of the Dark Mechanicus who swore allegiance to Michael making the World christened Pandemicus all but impregnable. The Ghost Knights have become deadly raiders launching raids into the segmentum Pacificus attacking any Xenos or imperial force spreading the gifts of Nurgle before returning to their world.

 

 

 

Homeworld

The Ghost Knights were and still are a large fleet based chapter which were constantly recruiting from the worlds they protected from pirates or raiders. Though most of their fleet was destroyed or forced to be abandoned due to suffering terrible damage during the "Betrayal" (as they refer to the event that resulted in them turning traitor) the Ghost Knights have captured many ships which they have refitted to their dark purposes including the Imperial Emperor class Battleship once named "Glory of Macharia" now known as the "Spectre of Decay" which serves as the flagship of their fleet, they also use a large number of space hulks. The world they claimed in the Halo Zone Pandemicus is a massive plague choked wasteland with seven mighty fortress cities ruled over by the chapters companies which produce countless weapons, armour and Daemon engines belching out toxic fumes. Though it is almost a Daemon wold it's greatest defense does not lie in the almost impregnable fortress cities or the fleet that guards it but in the Halo Zone it's self. The Halo Zone has always been known as a region of ghost by the Imperium which the Astronomican cannot penetrate as such any imperial fleet becomes lost and disorinated with their Navigators unable guide them through the warp falling easy victim to the Ghost Knights who's ships are guided by Daemonic sorcery.

 

 

 

Combat Doctrine

The Ghost Knights were a highly secretive and fiercely independent chapter who rarely allied them selves with others being known to abandon their allies in battle to fulfill their own agendas resulting in the near or total destruction of their allies coming to blows with many chapters. They were a merciless chapter who fought with a fierce zeal to eradicate all Xenos they encountered sometimes exterminating whole worlds to get rid of all taint of the foul Xenos or if the population was believed to be tainted from the Xenos population. They were masters of Urban combat as expert city fighters who were mainly a infantry force supported by dreadnoughts and other heavy firepower, they use a wide range of tanks mainly land raiders but solely use them for infantry support as they prefer the marksmanship of Devastators to take out armour. They use stealth as well as hit and run tactics to lure the enemy in to carefully planned killing zones where their heavy firepower decimates the enemy before leading deadly counter attacks to destroy their enemy on close combat. They still generally follow the same tactics since their fall to chaos though now they make a large use of daemon engines as well as using daemons and cultist allies. The Ghost Knights have been known to ally themselves with other chaos renegades (mainly Iron Warriors or Death Guard) taking part in the chaos invasion of the Sabbat worlds. With the outbreak of the "Night of a thousand rebellions" the Ghost Knights have launched a crusade to seize control of Imperial worlds in the Segmentum Pacificus. Though they have fought against Imperial forces on many times the chapter prefers to further their goal of exterminating all Xenos, actively seeking out any Xenos occupied world as such they have clashed with imperial forces (mainly inquisitors of the Ordo Xenos) that get in the way of the Ghost Knights goals.

 

 

 

Organisation

The Ghost Knights were known to generally follow the codex though instead of having assault, veteran or devastator companies each company contained it's own devastators, assault and veteran squads. The Ghost Knights tended to suffer harsh casualties in their crusade to purge all Xenos as such they had a extra scout company to supply the chapter losses with initiates who became full battle brothers replacing a companies losses becoming a permanent member of the company until death took them. The organisation of the Ghost Knights mainly remains the same since their fall to Chaos though now their chapter is lead by Michael Vilepox once Chief Librarian now a Plague Marine Sorcerer, also their Chaplains have embraced chaos and now they preach the Cult of Nurgle. Since they are no longer able to recruit new initiates into the chapter due to the corruption of their geneseed they have been known to capture space marines from other chapters to corrupt them to the worship of Nurgle becoming part of the Ghost Knights.

 

 

 

Beliefs

The Ghost were a dour as well as sombre chapter who had a morbid obsession with death making extensive offerings to the fallen believing them to live on as spirits who possessed the wargear and armour of others. Their Chapter was governed by a Mortuary in which Chaplains led countless services making offerings to the dead and holding strange funeral services in which ashes of the fallen were merged with newly forged armour and weapons so the spirits of the fallen lived on to fight again, they also adorned their armour and vehicles with trophies of slain Xenos. Librarians were revered as much as Chaplains as spiritual beings since they had the powers to communicate with the dead through not being held in suspicion or mistrust by their fellow battle brothers. The Ghost Knights hated all species of alien (especially eldar mainly due to the crippling defeats they suffered at their hands) seeing them as abominations, as such they would actively seek out warzones in which to kill them taking trophies from the slain to adorn their armour and vehicles with. Even though they turned traitor they still seek out any Xenos with a plague fleet of the Ghost Knights led by the "Spectre of Decay" being identified launching attacks into the Segmentum Tempestus attacking Tyranid splinter fleets of Hive Fleet Leviathan to test their plagues against the Tyranids and to slay some Xenos to take trophies.

 

 

 

Geneseed

The Ghost Knights geneseed is of the Ultramarines from their parent chapter the Mortifactors. Their geneseed was once pure and stable though now with their allegiance to Nurgle it has become infected as well as corrupted.

[Ace Debonair]

I'd be delighted to read through this, but that big block of text at the top is giving me headaches! :P

 

Could I reccommend some paragraph breaks? It'll make the wall of words a lot easier on the eyes!

 

Also, this might be of some use to you:

 

I thought that the scheme needed more stone-grey, hence the second scheme.

If you want to use either of them, feel free. :lol:

[Plaguecaster]

Thanks for advice have shortened the big paragraph into 4 smaller paragraphs hope that helps also thanks for the second scheme it looks really awesome I think I might use it, if anyone else has any issues or advice with the layout or information of my chapter and I should be able to quickly change it.

cheers

[Ace Debonair]

Righto. Since this is your first venture into the DIY warband world, I'll put the trademark 'Liber C&C bowling ball' away. ;)

 

This time. :cuss

 

Once a proud and noble chapter the Plague Knights known as the Ghost Knights before they turned traitor, were a crusading chapter founded during the 20th founding in order to patrol the edge of the Segmentum Pacificus to prevent Dark Eldar or other pirates raiding Imperial Worlds, they were dedicated to the extermination of all Xenos who they saw as abominations becoming masters of urban warfare and siegecraft.

 

That's one sentence? Try saying all that without stopping for breath!

 

Try a full stop after Pacificus, like so: "...Pacificus. Their goal was to prevent Dark Eldar..."

 

Also, you never use the name Plague Knights again after this one mention.

Just stick with Ghost Knights - it's a much better name anyway.

 

During the year 310.M37 they received a distress call a feudal world under attack from Orks, the Ghost Knights sent a small force including one devastator squad and two Tactical squad led by Epistolary Michael to destroy the Orks, unfortunately the Ork invasion was a distraction employed by Dark Eldar Raiders in order to capture slaves in secret, the strike force was wiped out after being ambushed with Michael being captured and tortured by a dark eldar haemoniculi.

 

That is a small force.

You also don't need to note the composition of said small force, as it's not in the least bit important.

 

Simply writing 'a small force' will suffice. ^_^

 

Also, that's one HUGE sentence again.

 

After losing contact with the strike force the Ghost Knights mobilized two companies to find out what happened to the strike force, arriving in the system before the Dark Eldar ship could escape. The Ghost Knights boarded the Dark Eldar ship killing every Eldar inside rescuing Epistolary Michael from the Haemoniculi. Despite harsh testing Michael was proven to be free of any taint though he now had a deep hatred of all Eldar and was willing to do anything to eradicate them once and for all no matter the cost.About 31 years later since being rescued Michael had risen to become Chief Librarian and led the 4th company to the Hive World of Posdav where a deadly plague had broken out making the planets inhabitants rebel against the imperium. During the siege of the Traitor Governors' palace captain Gabriel was infected by the deadly plague when his arm was cut from the plague ridden Governor's power sword who was slain aftewards though the plague quickly reduced the captain's resilient body to a decayed carcass. Horrified at first how even the superhuman resilience of a space marine was not immune against the plague Michael then thought that if the plague was so deadly against a space marine then how deadly would it be against Xenos, the surviving 4th company collected as much infected specimens to study and replicate the plague secretly in a bid to use it as a weapon against vile Xenos especially Eldar.

 

Oh damn. That's a really neat idea.

How does he convince his brothers to go near the stuff that just wiped out the chapter master, though?

 

After many unsuccessful attempts Michael was able to replicate the deadly plague making it even more deadlier and able to be used as a weapon, the test subject was the holy shrine world Silvana covered in vast cathedral cities which was suffering rebellion from Cultists and attacked by Dark Eldar raiders.

 

So they test their new kills-even-Astartes-in-minutes virus on an imperium-held world?

Isn't that just asking for trouble?

 

Launching the created plague into the atmosphere through missiles the plague proved beyond expectations not only wiping out every last Dark Eldar but all life on the planet, unfortunately Inquisitor Volk a Puritian of the Ordo Hereticus leading a large Ordo militant of Sisters of Battle, supported by 3 Death Korps of Krieg regiments and a small strike force of Grey Knights sent to defend the Shrine world was horrified at the genocide the Ghost Knights wantonly unleashed declaring them Excommunicate Traitoris to the imperium attacking the space marine fleet destroying a couple of their ships which had the first and most of the second company on them including chapter master Konrad as well as damaging the majority of the fleet.

 

Emperor, that's an epic sentence. And busy, too.

 

You don't need the composition of this force either. 'A large/vast Imperial force' will probably cover it nicely.

 

I knew it was asking for trouble, testing that virus there!

 

Enraged at what they thought a betrayal by Imperial forces the Ghost Knights rallied behind Chief Librarian Michael (who claimed undisputed leadership of the chapter) who lead the Ghost Knights onto the planets surface to fight to the death amongst the planet's largest cathedral city in an attempt to use their urban combat and city fighting skills to gain advantage against the overwhelming Imperial forces against them.

 

Wait, what?

Your guys take cover on the planet they just virus bombed and erased the life from completely not an hour previously?

 

It might be worth thinking twice about that, considering how quickly that stuff dissolved the last chapter master.

 

* big battle*

 

This isn't really important, save for the line where Michael calls out to any God to save the Ghost Knights.

 

But there's also only 10 of them left, so I doubt even Nurgle with his unusual sense of humour would bother himself. :P

 

With the their victory the remaining Ghost Knights swore allegiance to Nurgle becoming Plague Marines dedicated to spreading the plagues of Nurgle to all life both Xenos and to man bringing all empires not dedicated to Nurgle to a decaying ruin, the Ghost Knights led by Michael Alexander now Michael Vilepox entered the Eye of Terror where they rebuilt their strength allying themselves with the Traitor Legions (mainly the Death Guard, Word Bearers and Iron Warriors) until near the end of the Gothic War they lead a small Plague fleet undetected into the Segmentum Pacificus in the Halo Zone where they claimed an abandoned pre-imperial world which they fortified with help from a band Iron Warriors as well as some of the Dark Mechanicus who swore allegiance to Michael making the World christened Pandemicus all but impregnable from which they launch raids into the segmentum Pacificus causing as much damage and spreading the gifts of Nurgle before returning to their world.

 

Ten very busy plague marines, then. :D

 

Organisation

The Ghost Knights were known to generally follow the codex though instead of having assault, veteran or devastator companies each company contained it's own devastators, assault and veteran squads. The Ghost Knights tended to suffer harsh casualties in their crusade to purge all Xenos as such they had a extra scout company to supply the chapter losses with initiates who became full battle brothers replacing a companies losses becoming a permanent member of the company until death took them. The organisation of the Ghost Knights mainly remains the same since their fall to Chaos though now their chapter is lead by Michael Vilepox once Chief Librarian now a Plague Marine Sorcerer, also their Chaplains have embraced chaos and now they preach the Cult of Nurgle. Since they are no longer able to recruit new initiates into the chapter due to the corruption of their geneseed they have been known to capture space marines from other chapters to corrupt them to the worship of Nurgle becoming part of the Ghost Knights.

 

Again, I stress you've only left yourself with 10 marines (and can't recruit more!). You aren't going to be capturing diddly squat from anyone with more marines than you. :)

 

The Ghost were a dour and sombre chapter who though loyal to the Imperium did not worship the Emperor as a god instead they had a morbid obsession with death making extensive offerings to the fallen believing them to live on as spirits who possessed the wargear and armour of others as well as honoring the dreadnoughts of the chapter who they believed the spirit of the fallen lived on through the dreadnought even though the body failed them.

 

Most Astartes don't see the Emperor as a God.

 

That death-obsession (and the details after it) come out of nowhere, to be honest.

Some kind of mention earlier on would be fitting.

 

Geneseed

The Ghost Knights geneseed is of the Dark Angels from their parent chapter the Angels of Vengeance it is believed that the Dark Angles and some of their successors have swore to hunt down and destroy the Ghost Knights. Their geneseed was once pure and stable though now with their allegiance to Nurgle it has become infected as well as corrupted.

 

Wait, what?

 

If you're a DA successor, you'll have some involvement in hunting the Fallen. There's no mention of this in the IA, no Deathwing or Ravenwing or equivalents in the organisation, and no mention of DA at all until this point.

 

Take a tip from a veteran, and change the geneseed to Ultramarine - most chapters are UM successors, and there's honestly no genetic difference between UM and DA anyhow.

 

 

Overall advice:

 

Firstly, take a looksie at the DIY guide stickied at the top of the forum, just in case you haven't already.

Secondly, seek out the Octaguide (some search-fu required), an equally valuable tome of knowledge.

 

Next, you really need to get out of the habit of using sentences longer than my arm. :(

 

 

Now, the battle stuff:

 

You don't need all the details. The battles themselves are seldom important, and we've all read dozens.

 

What is important is the effects the battle has on the Chapter - in this case, they turn all nurgley.

 

So the battle can really be summed up as "In the ensuing conflict, Michael and his Ghost Knights were gravely damaged, losing many Astartes to the furious Imperial forces. In desperation, he called out to any God who could hear him for salvation. It was Nurgle who chose to answer his call, blighting the Imperial forces with repellent demons, oozing filth and toxins. Declaring his allegience to his new God, Michael charged, and the Ghost Knights followed suit, turning their backs for ever on their former lives."

 

In terms of the battle proper, it might be better to simply have the inquisitor and his forces engage the Astartes in space, shooting some of their ships down. Michael could call out for protection and vengeance, nurgle could answer, and blight the Imperial ships with swarms of daemons.

 

The Ghost Knights could then probably turn the tide of the battle, now having time to shoot virus-y stuff into the Inquisitor's ships, and run away.

 

 

 

 

All in all, though, this has a lot of potential, and some very neat ideas. Keep working on this, and you could have a truly fantastic IA on your hands. ^_^

[Plaguecaster]

Thanks for the advice will change it also when it says that Michael and 10 veterans where all that was left I was meant have it saying while the Ghost Knights were busy defending the fortress cathedral the Grey Knights teleported into the middle of the complex where they ambushed Michael and his closet followers it did not mean that only 10 Ghost Knights remain out of the whole chapter.

[Plaguecaster]

After reading your advice Ace Debonair I have changed the thread to make them sound better though if anything doesn't make any sense or sounds good let me know and I will change. Have found writing a renegade chapter to be more challenging as well as interesting than a loyalist diy chapter. I appreciate any advice on my Diy renegade chapter both good and bad.

Cheers

[InquisitorHayn]

Largely, I agree with Ace and you should have some great material if you follow his advice (especially about shortening the sentences, for which my overworked and tired eyes will thank you). However, there are two things that stood out to me, one of which is more trivial than the other. I'll give you the important one first.

 

1) This plague chewed through your Chapter Master like a dog through shoes, but it only made the normal humans crazy? How exactly does that work, especially considering the Ghost Knights later use it to wipe out a human-populated planet? And given that fact, why would your Librarian, in all his obvious wisdom, lead his men into the middle of it to fight an Imperial force of humans? Serious plot hole.

 

2) You lost me at Michael. It may seem shallow, but the reason many of us use names from ancient cultures or works of fiction is to detach our dashing heroes from the not-so-dashing everyman. It makes it more believable.

 

Example: Read both of these and tell me which one sounds more mighty and heroic to you.

Rallying behind Michael and their Daemonic allies, the Ghost Knights attacked the reeling Imperial fleet.

Rallying behind Galathrax and their Daemonic allies, the Ghost Knights attacked the reeling Imperial fleet.

 

Honestly, I sat there in the corners of my mind picturing your Ghost Knights wreathed in a cloud of plague, pointing at the Librarian and saying, " Look! Mikey likes it!"

 

Overall though, good thoughts. Just need to translate them into a more organized format now. Best of luck!