my first and very rough draft of the blood canaries

[Tj9614]

BLOOD CANARIES

 

Chapter Name: Blood Canaries

Gene Seed: Blood Angels

Founding Number: 26th

Planet Or Fleet Based: Fleet

Flagship Name: canary cruiser

Battle Cry: DESTROY THE METAL XENOS

 

HISTORY

 

The Blood Canaries are a young chapter coming from the 26th founding.

The Blood Canaries were once known by the name “Pure Bloods.” The Pure Bloods had a long history as very successful daemon hunters, the chapter master Miguel Navarro leading no less then 9 successful campaigns against the forces of chaos with his honour guard captain and friend sigismondo cellini by his side.

 

Navarro’s 10th campaign was like any of the previous, they landed on a desert world with rumours the daemon prince ???? and his forces were based there. Sure enough the chaos forces showed themselves and a massive war broke out with the full pure blood chapter outnumbered 5 to 1. The pure bloods tried to get word o0f there predicament out to their closest allies but to no avail, an unusual force was blocking all communications from the surface. The only option for them was to fight until the signals got through. For years the war raged the pure bloods numbers dwindling from 1000 to 200 as they took more and more casualties everyday. They stood fast against the daemon tide never falling back in the face of adversity until the emperor blessed them with the miracle of the sanguinor. The sanguinor appeared in the sky raising the hopes of the battle brothers on the ground. The sanguinor charged to the front-line of the combat offering a brief respite for the battle brothers to regroup and come back with a fervour they had not shown in months. with the sanguinor helping the front-line Miguel and his honour guard decided that they could make a charge for the daemon prince while terminator squad ???? tried to destroy the chaos warp.

Miguel and his honour guard fought through the mass of chaos daemons to reach the daemon prince. The daemon prince slated the first 2 honour guard members with ease as they foolishly charged at him. Miguel cellini and the standard bearer remained. The standard bearer standard charged in to attack but the daemon prince parried his attack as Miguel started to strike with his trusty power sword as well. The daemon prince was having difficulty with Miguel and the standard bearer as cellini charged into the fray when all of a sudden the daemon princess lopped off the standard bearers head with ease. cellini caught the chapter banner before it hit the ground so the standard bearers last death would not be dishonoured.

The daemon prince struck a mortal wound on Miguel with the distraction leaving just cellini to challenge him. With his chapter master and friend dying in front of him cellini promised his vengeance and threw his power sword at the daemon prince impaling it in the daemon princes chest. Miguel gave cellini his power sword and cellini charged at the prince once more beheading him and retrieving his own power sword. With the daemon prince dead cellini ran back to his chapter master but there was nothing he could do. The daemons started retreating through the warp portal just as the terminator squad were able to destroy it. After the fighting ceased there were no more then 100 surviving battle brothers the dead and dying collected fir their precious gene seed. Transported back to the strike cruiser by storm raven.

With the war over and another daemon prince killed the pure bloods thought they were done with this world but just as plans for a pick up were under way the earth started to shift all around them. From the dirt rose an unknown number of metal xenos they had never encountered before. Before they were even able to draw their swords the xenos were upon them slaying the surviving battle brothers before they knew what hit them.

Cellini and the terminator squad were fighting off the xenos as the storm raven came down to evac them. A quick search for others survivors from the air proved to futile and there was no choice but to return to the strike cruiser unable to even collect the gene seed from the dead.

 

Back on the strike cruiser plans were beginning to be made for cellini and the terminator squad as the only survivors of the pure blood chapter. What was decided was that they would build a new chapter from the gene seed of the dead they regained in the brief respite between the daemons and unknown metal xenos with cellini as the chapter master. The chapter would be named the blood canaries and instead of hunting daemons would solely hunt their xenos foe destroying every last one until they could be sure they had their vengeance against the foe that destroyed their chapter in their weakest moment. The terminator squad opted to keep their blood purifiers colours instead as a sign of respect of their former battle brothers and show where the blood canaries had come from. Cellini chose to have his armour repainted black with red shoulder trim until there came the time that all of the foe were wiped from existence.

 

HOMEWORLD

 

the blood canaries have no home world as they are constantly on the move in there flagship so they can follow any rumours of necron tomb worlds.

 

COMBAT DOCTRINE

 

the blood canaries are a very assault based army. They typically send in half of the first company and the death company as a kind of bait for the necrons and when the necrons awaken send in the 2nd 3rd and 4th company in via stormaraven.

The typical blood canary has one cq weapon and one pistol. Although commander cellini does take to the field with 2 power swords.

 

ORGANISATION

 

and follow the codex astartes. The first chapter is made up mostly of close quarter terminators and dreadnoughts. The second to fifth companies have 6 assault squads 3 tactical squads and 1 devastator squad. The sixth to ninth companies are reserves. And the tenth is made up of scouts.

 

BELIEFS

 

the blood canaries are very big on respect. Every battle brother be they commander captain or scout are all respected equally among each other. No life is meaningless as all are given to the same cause so if a battle brother does die they are given a a space burial the same as each other.

The blood canaries are also a very sombre chapter after the demise of the pure bloods, it is said that cellini has not felt the slightest joy since the day the necrons destroyed his previous chapter. He socialises very rarely rarely with the rest of the chapter preferring to be in his quarters alone paying some sort of penance for the loss of so many battle brothers. He only comes out for battle or briefing g/debriefing.

 

GENE-SEED

 

the blood canaries gene seed comes from the blood angels and ultimately sanguinis himself.

The blood canaries have the same gene seed flaws as all other blood angels chapters do.

The black rage though is thought of as a great honour as they have been chosen specifically out of all other battle brothers to hold the memories of sanguinis last battle and to give themselves to the emperor and mankind’s survival just as sanguinis himself once did.

The blood canaries other flaw came about due to an unknown circumstance. As a blood canary grows older their jaw juts out in almost beak like style. Thus vanguard veteran squads and captains tend to have a bigger “beak”like helmets.

 

RECRUITMENT

 

The blood canaries recruit from 12 different planets in the segmentum pacificus. Every 10 years Each planet offers their 10 best warriors and they come aboard the flagship and go through multiple punishing trials that can last anywhere between 6 and 18 months. At the end of the trials only 20 remain who will go through the implantation process to become scouts.

 

HERALDRY

 

the blood canaries have blood red power armour with yellow trim and a yellow right grieve

there badge is a black canary with a drop coming from the tip of its beak.

[Tj9614]

I'm not sure if no comments is good or bad

[Overlord-Rakszan]

Might want to format your page. Makesit more appealingtoread.

Guide

Keep up the good work :blink:

 

Also, minor complaint:

-Blood canaries? Name needs work.

-Origins and History is very brrief with very little info.

-Structure of the Chapters forces is a bit diorganised.

-Story could use a bit of clarity and detail.

-With sutch low numbers it is likley the Inquisition would remove the chapter and merg its remaining forces into anouther cahpter. 100 is very little to work with.

-The necron intervention is somewhat undewhelming. Look into them and see if you can find some intresting flavours to add.

-100 marines cannot find and destroy a Necron Tombworld of Millions. The Canoptekh defenceswould wipe them out.

-Why are they hunting tombworlds? Yes they were attcked but casualties to the Necrons were low compaired to theDaemons. Why not just continue hunting Daemons.

-Metal Xenos? The Imperium is fully aware they are known as Necrons. Necrons can now speak to tell them.

-Overall, everything needs more detail or it comes across as dull.

 

This is ment in all respects as advice, and everything above is to help improve your chapter.

One Chapter founder to anouther. ;)

 

GLORY TO CHAOS!!! :rolleyes:

[Ace Debonair]

BLOOD CANARIES

I have to know where the inspiration for this name came from.

 

My advice would be to settle down and have a good read of the DIY guide, linked in the sticky at the top of the forum.

It's quite a long read, but very very worthwhile. ;)

[Tj9614]

@acedebonair The name came from canaries in the mines it's kind of an interim name ATM

@overlord-rakszan thanks I'll go read it and try to expand on it I have to admit I wrote this at 4.30am.

Another question though how do I go about formatting it properly??

[ironloki]

Here is a link to some guides about formatting

 

Formatting

 

Also, Overlord-Rakszan provided you with a nice link to formatting text.

 

I agree that your name needs a bit of changing. Most Space Marine Chapters get their names from aggressive animals since they are, normally, very angry and stompy superhumans. You can keep the bird idea, but have a google or a think - Ravens, Crows, Hawks etc are rather traditional.

 

the blood canaries are very big on respect. Every battle brother be they commander captain or scout are all respected equally among each other. No life is meaningless as all are given to the same cause so if a battle brother does die they are given a a space burial the same as each other.

The blood canaries are also a very sombre chapter after the demise of the pure bloods, it is said that cellini has not felt the slightest joy since the day the necrons destroyed his previous chapter. He socialises very rarely rarely with the rest of the chapter preferring to be in his quarters alone paying some sort of penance for the loss of so many battle brothers. He only comes out for battle or briefing g/debriefing.

 

There are some good ideas here. I like the idea of grief and respect. However, I would change that to 'reverence for the dead' as im sure being respectful is a daily part of Marine life. You could play around with the themes of death and grief, how each death stiffens the resolve of the Chapter as a whole. To make each death more painful perhaps you could run with the idea that your Chapter has taken a lot of beatings within the last few years combating the Necrons. Each campaign sees a lot of bloodshed that the Chapter is finding hard to stem the flow and provide fresh recruits. That makes their struggle more poignant!