MooFreaky Posted September 9, 2012 Share Posted September 9, 2012 I am posting this here, as well as on other forums, as I want to get the widest views possible. I know there used to be many great fluff peeps here (many of who I rated much higher than those from other forums) but I have no idea who is around now. Either way, it doesn't take much to post here too. Basically I have always loved thinking about the idea of other Primarchs leading the Heresy and how they would have gone about it. I had been throwing around ideas for a while before being show to the Dornian Heresy stuff here on Bolter & Chainsword (woo it's awesome). The idea of a different type of Heresy is something I think is great, offering vastly different ways of playing out. The one Primarch that stands out, in terms of interest, is Alpharius. Compared to the others I believe his to be of the greatest intrigue because of his situation. Being the last found he doesn't have the relationships to play on, nor hugely effective ways of pulling strings; however, being the strategic mastermind he is, there as so many really unique ways he can get things rolling. The basic "rule" (aka more guideline where needed) is that I want to keep the same basic timeline and progression of the original 40k. Unlike the Dornian Heresy stuff I am wanting to keep background changes minimal, thus putting Alpharius in the same "world" that Horus was in. The only changes I want to make are from when Alpharius was actually chosen, meaning all the growing up of the Primarchs, their finding and so forth all remains the same, as Alpharius wasn't there to alter any of that. I have the Overview here, but as I am fleshing out stuff I am posting it in my second post (Post 3) to avoid creating too much clutter. Overview Alpha Legion - Disillusioned and angered by constant run-ins with Guilliman and Dorn, regarding his methods of war. Alpharius perfects his methods, taking them to further extremes – getting better results than ever. - Eventually Guilliman punished Alpharius for not changing his methods. - Horus dispatches Lorgar to calm Alpharius, as the Word Bearers had been similarly chastised and had recovered to be productive members of the Imperium. - Lorgar leads Alpharius further astray, eventually Alpharius to become Chaos’ chosen champion. - Alpharius arranged Horus to be injured by the Anathame blade. - Alpharius and Omegon proceed to generate relations with their brothers by undermining others and arousing suspicions and hatred between other Primarchs. - Eventually Alpharius is defeated and killed; however, Omegon is saved by Tzeench and becomes his servant. Creating the illusion that Alpharius still lives and that he is eternal. Remain Alpha Legion in order to build upon this myth. Blood Angels - Following the Space Wolves fall into heresy and the release of the Wulfen Curse, mutation within the Imperium becomes feared and loathed. - Sanguinius, due to his wings, becomes the target of suspicion and hatred, flamed by Alpha Legion’s intelligence forces. He is suspected as a traitor, or at least a sign of great evil. - During a meeting of the Primarchs (to discuss the aftermath of Russ’ betrayal and Magnus’ imprisonment) Alpharius whispers many things to Kurze. Aided by the powers of Chaos, Kurze’s paranoia overwhelms him and he attacks Sanguinius. - Sanguinius has his wings ripped from his body and is mutilated by Kurze, resulting in the Black Rage. - Humiliated, deformed and enraged Sanguinius falls to Khorne. Dark Angels - Loyal - Want to give them some love. But not sure how... Death Guard - As per canon, considered to be loyal to Hours (as pointed out by both Sanguinius and Guilliman to the Emperor). This holds true, as they refuse to sway. - When the Wolves succumb to Nurgle and destroy Prospero, the Death Guard follow up. - Resilient (but not immune) to the poisons the Plague Wolves spread, the Death Guard are the natural choice to combat the Space Wolves. - Hating the Space Wolves for their vile afflictions and seeing it as a grace the Death Guard earned, rather than sold their souls for, they became great rivals. Emperor’s Children - Never corrupted by the Daemon blade. - However, their bizarre rituals still lead them to strange places. - When Ferrus Mannus turns to Chaos, Fulgrim refuses to follow. - During the Drop Site Massacre, Fulgrim witnesses Angron overpower and ready himself to kill Mannus. Fulgrim cannot see his brother killed and intervenes, seriously injuring Angron. Fulgrim is seen as a traitor and has no choice but to switch sides, resulting in a massacre of Loyalist forces. Imperial Fists - Incorruptible as they come, Dorn remains loyal. Minimal changes to canon. - Defends Guilliman during his period of self doubt and poor performances (due to Omegon’s undermining efforts). Remains steadfastly supportive of the Ultramarines and their Primarch. - Leads the loyalists in their campaign to stop Alpha Legion, while keeping the fractured loyalist Primarchs together. - Finds the bodies of the Emperor, Horus and Alpharius. Iron Hands - The Iron Hands’ need to replace their hands (or otherwise mechanically improve) grows into an obsession. - The Iron Hands, lead by the Iron Fathers, begin improving the bodies of many Marines, adding mechanical augmentations to already enhanced biologics. - Close relationship with the Mechanicum, helping create the first Skitarii forces. - This obsession eventually leads to Slaanesh (resulting in many Mechanicum Skitarii forces also falling to Slaanesh) Iron Warriors - Canon remain largely unchained pre heresy. - As soon as Alpharius’ rebellion becomes known, Dorn realizes they have been played. Issues between himself and Perturabo were likely an attempt to divide the brothers. - Dorn goes straight to Perturabo and apologises, admitting his failure and asking his brother to see they were both played. He knows his pride means nothing in the face of the war that is to come, and cannot afford to have Perturabo side with Alpharius. - Though hatred still remains, Perturabo cannot abide being used and agrees to prove the Iron Warriors are superior warriors, by killing more traitors than the Imperial Fists do. - Between Dorn and Perturabo they build the greatest defensive structures ever and provide the best possible forces to man them. Night Lords - Canon largely unchanged pre Heresy. - Does not attack Dorn in a crazed rage, instead is twisted into attacking Sanguinius. - Canon remains largely the same after Heresy, though develops a mutually hateful relationship with the Blood Angels. Raven Guard - Canon regarding issues with Horus remain the same. - Caught up in Omegon’s action against Guilliman. - Omegon arranges for Raven Guard (including Corax) to be overwhelmed due to Ultramarines’ failure to do their job. Corax is saved when Alpharius alters the plan and engages Ork forces, taking massive casualties to save Corax, the Raven Guard and White Scars. - Corax trusts Alpharius completely, owing his life and believing Alpharius risked everything to save him. - Corax rages at Guilliman. Guilliman’s refusal to admit his error, leads Corax to knock him out, swearing to never work with the Ultramarines again. - Enraged further when Dorn refuses to side with him in criticizing Guilliman’s actions. - During Heresy, Corax sees a chance to get back at Guilliman, and already dislikes Horus and Dorn, so sides with Alpharius. Salamanders - Largely unchanged. Though want to give them some more love. - Present at the drop-site massacre. Sons of Horus - The most beloved son of the Emperor and his dedication was unwavering, Chaos could not corrupt him so looked elsewhere. - Alpharius knew Horus to be the biggest threat. Sent Erebus to steal the Anathame and arrange for Horus to be injured by it, hoping to kill the Warmaster. - Horus was only injured, but the Chaos infused blade drove him mad. - Sons of Horus couldn’t risk their Primarch being seen in such a state, given others would want his position. - Erbeus convinces them to enlist Alpharius help. Alpharius is the most talented strategist and could make decisions that could be passed off as Horus’, giving Horus time to heal. Alpharius would definitely not contact Dorn or Guilliman, the two biggest risks, and had ties only to Horus. Thus he was considered perfect, and his aid enlisted. - Alpharius began making decisions in the Warmaster’s stead, passing them off as Horus’. - Ordered Guilliman to take command of the Ork Waaagh! on the Eastern Fringe. When he failed, ordered Alpharius to take command. - Regained himself after the Heresy became clear. Aided by Dorn, recovered fully and took his place defending the palace. - Teleported with the Emperor to attack Alpharius. When he came face to face with Alpharius and moved to engage, was stabbed from behind by Omegon (who was still unknown to all but Alpha Legion) and killed. Space Wolves - Canon pre Prospero remains. - Thanks to Alpharius’ spy networks, knowledge of Wulfen Curse was known to all the Primarchs. - As attack on Prospero commenced, Ahriman unleashed “Ahriman’s Reckoning”, a great spell that unleashed the Curse of the Wulfen in all the Space Wolves. - Those on the ground were paralyzed with pain, swiftly cut down by the Thousand Sons. - Those not committed to the fight were trapped in the fleet, too animalistic to use the technology, and busy attacking the human crews. - Russ, overwhelmed by pain, watching his Marines being slaughtered around him, and an ever increasing number of his sons turning into mindless beasts, was approached by Nurgle. - Nurgle attracted to Wolve’s resilience to pain and the elements, refusing to relent and desire to keep fighting no matter how much damage is inflicted upon them. They are taught from birth to never give in to the hardships and dangers of life. - Offering a path of vengeance and to have any Wulfen given control of their minds, Russ accepted. - The Space Wolves regained themselves, the pain of transformation removed and annihilated the Thousand Sons. - Space Wolves that lose control and become Wulfen (either willingly, or otherwise) become Plague Wolves. Beasts infected with terrible toxins, spreading disease wherever they go. - Nurgle saw an opportunity to gain control of a power force, while also destroying a force that could end up in Tzeench’s control… double win. - Fought solo for a long time while Alpharius prepared for action. Fighting against the Death Guard. - Joined Alpharius when the Heresy came out. Thousand Sons - Early canon remain, regarding Nikea and being the target of Tzeench. - Magnus confides in Ahriman that the Wolves suffer from the Wulfen Curse. - After contacting the Emperor, Magnus realizes what he has done and that he was a tool. He refuses to take part and scoffs Tzeench. Prepares his forces to be annihilated. - Ahriman casts “Ahriman’s Reckoning” and unleashes the Wulfen Curse upon the Wolves. - Thousand Sons begin carving the Wulfen apart, while those not yet suffering are easy targets without support. Until Wolves turn to Chaos. - Seeing the Wolves turn to Chaos and the foul beasts they have become Magnus engages. When it becomes apparent they have lost, he flees what little remains of the Thousand Sons. - Arriving on Terra, Magnus accepts his punishment and is imprisoned, along with his Legion, while the Emperor decides what to do with them. - During the Siege of Terra, Magnus breaks out and releases his Legion, playing a pivotal role in defeating the Archtraitor and his forces. - As punishment, Magnus willingly took his place atop the Golden Throne. Forever protecting the remains of the Emperor and allowing the Astronomican to be directed through him (removing the need for the Choir). - The Thousand Sons were broken down into small teams, working within other Legions (now Chapters), to train and develop their Librarians, as well as providing their potent psychic powers (both on and off the battlefield) to Chapters when needed. Ultramarines - Canon largely unchanged until pre-heresy. - Voices disapproval for Alpharius’ manner of waging war. When Alpharius only gets worse (and is clearly challenging Guilliman), Guilliman tells all those with ties, commitments, debts or other loyalty to the Ultramarines to not work with Alpharius, as it is a waste of resources and can be better used elsewhere. - Ordered by “Horus” to deal with the massive Ork Waaagh! hitting the Eastern Borders. Fails to turn back the Waaagh! and increasingly ineffective in dealing with it. Several defeats sees Alpharius arrive and take command. - During major offensive in Alpharius’ strategy, Ultramarines leave position after receiving reliable information that the Orks are going to ignore Alpharius’ trap and begin an invasion of Ultramar (intel is false, supplied by Omegon). - Guilliman’s action almost kill Corax (and cause severe casualties to Raven Guard, White Scar and Alpha Legion forces committed). Knocked out by Corax after a fight. - Constant, subtle, undermining by Omegon sees Guilliman become less efficient. His tactics and decisions begin getting questioned. - Self doubt grows within Guilliman, respect from other Legions falls. Only Dorn is completely supportive. - Leads the Drop Site attack and is massacred, completely shattering his self confidence. - After the Heresy, Dorn pulls Guilliman together and Guilliman becomes key in keeping the failing Imperium together. - Pens, Codex Astartes. Implemented much later, largely due to Dorn’s support and belief. White Scars - Early canon remains largely the same (what little there is). - Never close to his brothers, as he was seen as aloof and untrustworthy (or, at least, unreliable). Particularly Guilliman. - Developed closer ties with Alpharius because he saw the value in Khan’s abilities and how they could effectively be used. - Relationship with Alpharius cemented during the Waaagh! invasion on the Eastern Fringe. Similarly, relations with Corax improved, while shattered with Guilliman, who already didn’t have the closest relations with Khan. Word Bearers - Largely the same Canon. - Dispatched by Horus to bring Alpharius back into the fold. Instead leads Alpharius completely off the rails. World Eaters - Angron was seen as an easy target for Alpharius. His rage issues, coupled with long standing issues with the Emperor (and general distaste for most of his brothers) made switching him easy. - However, Alpharius saw him as a weak ally, offering little to Alpharius’ methods and who would have insubordination issues. - Alpharius deliberately left Angron alone, hoping to take advantage of his obvious flaws. - Present at the Drop Site Massacre. As Angron was about to kill Ferrus Mannus, he was attacked by Fulgrim and severely injured. Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/260606-the-alpharius-heresy-v03-updated-111/ Share on other sites More sharing options...
Andystarscream Posted September 9, 2012 Share Posted September 9, 2012 I really enjoyed reading this, although i'd suggest making Purtarabo loyal as the interaction with Dorn could be fun :) Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/260606-the-alpharius-heresy-v03-updated-111/#findComment-3170945 Share on other sites More sharing options...
MooFreaky Posted September 9, 2012 Author Share Posted September 9, 2012 This stuff is more fleshed out, though it is not proper writing. It is still the core ideas, simply expanded upon. They will need to be expanded further - this just gives some more weight behind the skeleton that exists in the OP. The First Heretic Lorgar spread faith and worship of the Emperor as a divine being, going against his father’s vision of uniting the galaxy in secular truth. As punishment for this great sin the Emperor made Lorgar and the Word Bearers Legion watch as Roboute Guilliman raze the city of Monarchia (the capital of Khur, a planet of significance to the Word Bearers) as punishment for his actions. Lorgar was lost without his faith, unable to know what path to follow when all his beliefs had been shattered. In this moment of uncertainty Lorgar was vulnerable to the whispers of Chaos. Lorgar, encouraged by his most trusted, and already corrupt, advisors Erebus and Kor Phaeron fell into the service of the Chaos Gods. Alpharius Alpharius was the last of the Emperor’s progeny to be found, placing him at a disadvantage with his brothers. He had neither the relationships the others had developed over decades and centuries, nor the respect that could only be earned through battle. To counterbalance this weakness, Alpharius put great effort into establishing the most comprehensive and effective intelligence network within the Imperium. Spies, informants, information brokers, intelligence officers and much more became entwined in a vast web of knowledge, secrets and intelligence. Alpharius always knew his enemies, as well as his friends, allowing the most effective methods to achieve goals. Reliable intelligence allowed surgical strikes at key locations; operatives sabotaged enemy positions; assassinations removed key personnel; uprisings were incited. Martial force was but one tool in Alpharius’ arsenal. It didn’t take long for deals to be struck with powerful Houses of Assassins. Alpharius used his influence and resources to empower the various Houses, who in turn pledged their allegiance to him. Both Rogal Dorn and Roboute Guilliman looked upon Alpharius’ methods with disapproval. Dorn felt the underhanded methods employed by the Alpha Legion were cowardly and unclean, while Guilliman believed them to be inefficient and out of line with his own methods. Alpharius had heated arguments with both Guilliman and Dorn on numerous occasions, resulting in bitter relationships with both Legions. The most combustive argument occurred when Guilliman question Alpharius’ approach to war, pointing to his own Legion’s record. Alpharius took his methods forward, pushing his Legion harder and harder. The Legion took on more powerful enemies in increasingly more dangerous situations, forcing his Legion to grow as warriors and putting greater reliance on their flexibility and ability to incorporate multi-faceted warfare. Splitting his Legion further allowed Alpha Legion to operate in more theatres of war, as less manpower was needed with Alpharius deliberately handicapping his own forces. Guilliman became ever more irate at Alpharius., enraged at his attitude and conduct, believing Alpharius to be “little more than a disrespectful child”. The meeting ended in blows and Alpharius storming out. In response, Guilliman declared that all elements of the Imperium loyal to him would no longer work alongside Alpharius, as he considered it too great a waste of time and resources. The Ultramarines had 2 centuries of relationships and history that Alpha Legion couldn’t match, so Guilliman’s ties were extensive. This resulted in numerous elements of Alpharius’ fleet leaving or simply refusing to do their job. With elements of the Legion is entrenched and/or isolated the breakdown proved disastrous. Alpha Legion forces went un-reinforced and lacked resources, resulting in considerable casualties and the loss of much of the work Alpha Legion had done, as they were forced to withdraw toward Imperial space. Enraged by this act Alpharius gathered his Legion, replaced those who had left on Guilliman’s command and again pushed further into uncharted space, laying waste to all those encountered as he and the Alpha Legion took out their anger on any enemy that presented themselves. Concerned for his brother, Horus could not stand by and allow Alpharius to become dangerous isolated in his relationships. He dispatched Lorgar and the Word Bearers to Alpharius’ side. Horus knew Lorgar had been through similarly tough times, but had overcome such censure and grown into the role expected of him. Instead Lorgar took Alpharius further away, bonding with the youngest Primarch over their mutual hatred for Guilliman and the Ultramarines. Lorgar subtly encouraged the seeds of anger, resentment and despair within Alpharius, turning him into a bitter and twisted man. Soon Alpharius pledge himself to Chaos, becoming the champion of the Dark Gods. Horus Horus could never be turned, Alpharius knew this. Horus had been the prime target of Chaos; however, his loyalty and devotedness was unassailable. With this failure Chaos had turned to the master strategist, one whose schemes and strategies could achieve what Horus would have done with charisma and power. Now it was left for Alpharius to remove the threat Horus provided. Dispatching Erebus to Horus’ fleet, it was ensured that a vile blade of Chaos, the Anathame, fell into the hands of Horus’ enemies. Horus was positioned so that an ambush was sprung and the Warmaster struck by the tainted blade. Alpharius’ plan did not succeed and Horus survived. However, the taint of Chaos, warped Horus’ mind, driving him mad. The Sons of Horus could not risk word of Horus’ condition getting out, as others would surely claim the Warmaster’s title. Horus would not be trusted again. On Lorgar’s advice Alpharius was called. Alpharius was the only Primarch that could be trusted. He possessed ties only with Horus and he definitely would not talk to the Primarch’s whose opinions were most feared, Dorn and Guilliman. Furthermore, Alpharius possessed the strategic decision making required for such decisions to be passed of as Horus’. For the time being, Alpharius would make decisions in Horus’ stead, allowing Hours time to recover. The Secret War Alpharius knew he did not have the relationships required to attract more of his brothers to his side, instead he would have to work to create reasons for defections. He saw an opportunity to both breakdown the loyalty of some Legions, while also undermining his most hated brother. Alpharius dispatched Omegon into the Ork dominated territories beyond the Eastern Fringe. Plunging deep into the Ork Empires, Omegon and a small force of hand picked operatives (both Alpha Legion and human) began the wheels turning on a vast scheme to undermine Guilliman and severe his ties with fellow Legions. Omegon picked the most dangerous of the Warbosses in the region, Gizbot Skull Krusha, and marked him for ascension to greatness. Omegon engineered wars between the various Tribez with a vast array of schemes. They raided key Ork facilities, leaving behind evidence that the raids were carried out by rivals. The Alpha Legion gave the various weapons and materials they had stolen during raids to other Tribez in exchange for attacking their neighbours. Soon the entire sector was engulfed in Orkish warfare. Assassinations of Warbosses were carried out, ensuring the quick ascension of Gizbot from Warboss into Overlord of the numerous Tribez and Empires. The result was a massive Waaagh! that crashed into the Imperial Eastern Fringe. In response to the most massive Ork incursion ever seen, Guilliman and his Ultramarines sallied forth, as did forces from the Emperor’s Children, Raven Guard and Alpha Legion. Guilliman dismissed the need for the Alpha Legion forces; however, Horus had been insistent. The Alpha Legion was the only other force with significant numbers in the area and thus they were needed to protect the Imperium. Guilliman grudgingly accepted this. Omegon used compromised Ultramarine intelligence networks to feed false information to Guilliman. Never enough to arouse suspicion, yet just enough to reduce his efficiency. Guilliman was succeeding in combating the Waaagh!, though he was increasingly less effective in doing so. As the war raged Omegon began feeding more and more intelligence to the Orks, allowing them to respond to Guilliman’s action with great efficiency. Coupled with feeding increasingly erratic intelligence and subtly sabotaging plan, Guilliman soon began to lose control of the war. Alpharius and Corax arrived, brining with them significant re-enforcements. By the Warmaster’s order Alpharius was to take command as the Ork numbers were beginning to swell, threatening to overrun the Eastern Fringe. Thanks to extensive intelligence and the substantial work of his operatives Alpharius’ command was perfect and the Orks were forced back on every front and soon the Waaagh! had been halted. Guilliman was unhappy with the methods used, and his attitude toward Alpharius was venomous. However, Corax found the methods brilliant. The Raven Guard’s own attitude of hit and run, precision strikes and flexibility fitted Alpharius’ plans perfectly. Corax held Alpharius with newfound respect, while questioning Guilliman’s attitude toward him. A crucial battle, aimed at breaking the back of the Waaagh! was set to take place. Corax and his Raven Guard, along with the Emperor’s Children, would draw the Orks into an engagement. While support from the Ultramarines and Alpha Legion would come once underway. Shortly before the battle commenced, Guilliman received intelligence from a reliable source that Ultramar was to be attacked by a massive force of Orks, who were set to ignore Alpharius’ trap and raze Ultramar instead. Unable to contact Alpharius and with time running out, Guilliman withdrew the vast majority of his forces and moved to protect his worlds. The attack came, just as Alpharius expected, and the Raven Guard and Emperor’s Children were being overrun. Without Ultramarine support the Imperial forces were being annihilated. With the plan broken down, thanks to Guillimans actions, Alpharius was forced to adjust. The Alpha Legion threw themselves into the battle, taking the majority of the focus, while allowing the Raven Guard and Emperor’s Children to regroup and re-engage. Alpharius’ quick actions saved his brother Legion’s forces, but cost his own dearly. Victory was achieved but Alpha Legion took the most significant casualties. Meanwhile a minor Ork fleet entered Ultramarine space. It was small enough that the local defenses would easily have dealt with the threat. Corax was enraged, accusing Guilliman of jealousy and deliberately trying to undermine Alpharius. He insisted Guilliman was more than happy to sacrifice anything, including Corax’s life, to get at Alpharius. Guilliman insisted that he had acted in the best interest of the Imperium, with the intelligence he had, his reaction just justified. Corax laughed at Guilliman’s record over the campaign and said Guilliman cared only for Ultramar, not for the Imperium. A fight broke out between the two, ending with Guilliman unconscious and Corax swearing to never work alongside the Ultramarines again. Corax’s opinion of Alpharius was absolute, he had seen Alpharius throw himself and his Legion into battle in order to save his allies, willingly taking his own losses for the greater good. Furthermore, his command had been exquisite. The Cyclops and the Wolf Coming Soon... Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/260606-the-alpharius-heresy-v03-updated-111/#findComment-3171074 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kol Saresk Posted September 9, 2012 Share Posted September 9, 2012 One, don't worry about the whole "Alpha Legion never fails" thing, they do have their failures in the Heresy from information accidentally getting out to someone who wasn't supposed to know, operatives getting captured and tortured, a small civil war, thirty Space Marine operatives getting killed and a few, what some would call minor, "defeats". Or in their case since they're the CIA, minor defeats in intelligence warfare is equal to massacres in the battlefield. Most of it is hype from the fans, just like the whole hype about the Wolves being super Bad A executioners who are willing to slaughter entire Legions. Of course, there were seventeen other Legions who were more than willing to do the same in an Imperial civil war. That and there are only two instances of Marines actually being imitated. Two, I actually like this stuff. It's unique and interesting. And it really makes me happy because you did one of the few things almost no one ever thinks about: You were willing to make the alternate universe alternate. The only other thing I would say is that there is one part where you talk about the "Curse of the Wulfen", but you wrote "Cure of the Wulfen". Threw me for a loop for a second. Also, I like the snippet about Curze and Sanguinius. Makes me happy to be a Night Lord. :rolleyes: And nice touch with bringing back the Alpha Legion's Tzeentch Alignment. EDIT: I ammended one of my statements. Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/260606-the-alpharius-heresy-v03-updated-111/#findComment-3171109 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Olis Posted September 9, 2012 Share Posted September 9, 2012 And it really makes me happy because you did one of the few things no one ever thinks about: You were willing to make the alternate universe alternate. Oi! What's that supposed to mean? :rolleyes: Interesting choice to go for Alpharius, MooFreaky. One of the things I like about the Alpha Legion (thanks to the newer representations) is the fact that they can and do use imposters (regardless of the slightly askew details of a particular novel *cough*Raven's Flight!*cough*). It allows for impressively complex operations that wouldn't be possible otherwise. That said, I must warn you about attempting to have Omegon pretend to be Horus. Omegon is not of the same stature as Horus (in fact, IIRC, Alpharius and Omegon appear to be slightly larger astartes, rather than 'primarch-sized'). I would like to suggest a revision for Fulgrim's (and Ferrus Manus') story - having him fall merely due to grief and self-hatred would require a longer journey, in a literary sense, than just the death of his closest brother at his own hands. Personally I'd like to see Fulgrim and Ferrus Manus to remain loyal and alive in this iteration. In each major 'alternative' and in Canon, Ferrus Manus has died (by decapitation). It would be nice to see him survive the Heresy, for once. :) Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/260606-the-alpharius-heresy-v03-updated-111/#findComment-3171139 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kol Saresk Posted September 9, 2012 Share Posted September 9, 2012 And it really makes me happy because you did one of the few things no one ever thinks about: You were willing to make the alternate universe alternate. Oi! What's that supposed to mean? :lol: Nothing you have to worry about. Just that a lot of these "discussions" on alternate heresies, people go "That can't happen because it didn't happen that way in the Prime-verse" or "That Primarch can't turn Traitor because he was raised this way in the Prime-verse" and my personal favorite "That Primarch would never even do something like that because he was that Primarch. In the Prime-verse." It's just that a lot of people miss the point of it being "alternate". Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/260606-the-alpharius-heresy-v03-updated-111/#findComment-3171145 Share on other sites More sharing options...
MooFreaky Posted September 9, 2012 Author Share Posted September 9, 2012 I would like to suggest a revision for Fulgrim's (and Ferrus Manus') story - having him fall merely due to grief and self-hatred would require a longer journey, in a literary sense, than just the death of his closest brother at his own hands. Personally I'd like to see Fulgrim and Ferrus Manus to remain loyal and alive in this iteration. In each major 'alternative' and in Canon, Ferrus Manus has died (by decapitation). It would be nice to see him survive the Heresy, for once I was planning on having a longer journey, I was simply summarizing. That said the comments about Fulgrim and Ferrus being on the same team is interesting, and having the decapitation rehash is a bit boring. I do like the idea of Ferrus being the Slaaneshi... however, I'm sure there are others that can take that role. I will have a think. I will do likewise with the Horus doppleganger. It probably is a bit over the top to take his place, just a bit too much. Perhaps Omegon can be responsible for running the back of house, operative side of things. Having a special unit in the field focused on the key intelligence roles. He could be the one who does all the work against Guilliman perhaps. Loving the feedback! will make changes and throw around more ideas soon. Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/260606-the-alpharius-heresy-v03-updated-111/#findComment-3171171 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Olis Posted September 9, 2012 Share Posted September 9, 2012 While I'm here - In my mind's eye, I just can't reconcile the Space Wolves and Nurgle. Perhaps the Iron Warriors might take their place? (Which would be kinda cool.) Personally, the Wolves seem very much like an 'Undivided' faction if they were to fall. Yes, they fell to Khorne in the Dornian Heresy and that would seem the only patron that would be an 'easy' fit for them but I just have trouble for them to become entralled to any other major chaos god. The only other choice that would be apparent would be Malal... Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/260606-the-alpharius-heresy-v03-updated-111/#findComment-3171190 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Andystarscream Posted September 9, 2012 Share Posted September 9, 2012 I just have trouble for them to become entralled to any other major chaos god i understand your thinking here as i thought the same about the night lords untill recently, so i'll counter it with what made me think again about it. In Soul Hunter Talos is tempted by the chaos gods and sees visions of him self dedicated to each in turn Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/260606-the-alpharius-heresy-v03-updated-111/#findComment-3171243 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Olis Posted September 9, 2012 Share Posted September 9, 2012 I just have trouble for them to become entralled to any other major chaos god i understand your thinking here as i thought the same about the night lords untill recently, so i'll counter it with what made me think again about it. In Soul Hunter Talos is tempted by the chaos gods and sees visions of him self dedicated to each in turn True, true. I seem to recall one of them (was it Nurgle?) didn't even try. He knew any effort to convert him was fruitless. But that's by the by. :) Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/260606-the-alpharius-heresy-v03-updated-111/#findComment-3171249 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Andystarscream Posted September 9, 2012 Share Posted September 9, 2012 I just have trouble for them to become entralled to any other major chaos god i understand your thinking here as i thought the same about the night lords untill recently, so i'll counter it with what made me think again about it. In Soul Hunter Talos is tempted by the chaos gods and sees visions of him self dedicated to each in turn True, true. I seem to recall one of them (was it Nurgle?) didn't even try. He knew any effort to convert him was fruitless. But that's by the by. :) yes nurgle said something along the lines of i see nothing in you i can use, but saying that i find it hard to beleive anybody would choose nurgle because eeeeewwwwwwwwwwww :) Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/260606-the-alpharius-heresy-v03-updated-111/#findComment-3171257 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Olis Posted September 9, 2012 Share Posted September 9, 2012 Well, he is the only Chaos god that overtly cares for his minions... :) Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/260606-the-alpharius-heresy-v03-updated-111/#findComment-3171259 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Andystarscream Posted September 9, 2012 Share Posted September 9, 2012 but still.... yuck :) Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/260606-the-alpharius-heresy-v03-updated-111/#findComment-3171262 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wade Garrett Posted September 9, 2012 Share Posted September 9, 2012 "Everyone wants to meet somebody who'll take all their pain away. For a lucky few...I am that person." Pheilmtheron, Great Unclean One One of Nurgle's temptation tactics is to reach out to people who are in horrible, horrible suffering, and offer to make that suffering. Yes, sign up with Poppa Nurgle and you'll never hurt again (because the necessary pain receptors just rotted away). It almost seems like a nice thing...although the Grandfather loses "Good Guy" points considering that half the time it's plagues and posions he cooked up that put the tempted individuals in horrible suffering to begin with. Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/260606-the-alpharius-heresy-v03-updated-111/#findComment-3171328 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kol Saresk Posted September 9, 2012 Share Posted September 9, 2012 Imagine, you are dying from a disease. Snot, vomit and unspeakable nasties are constantly being coughed up from inside your lungs. You are on your deathbed, your body constantly wracked with unbearable pain. And then you hear a voice. The voice tells you that it can't get rid of the disease, but it can make you stronger, it can take away the pain and allow you to breathe freely once more, relatively speaking of course. If you say yes, you sign the pretty dotted line with your own blood and say goodbye to your soul. Say no, you die. But you don't want to die, not yet anyways. Perhaps never. So you sign the line that you agree to an immortality wracked with disease and really bad looks. Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/260606-the-alpharius-heresy-v03-updated-111/#findComment-3171351 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Aegnor Posted September 10, 2012 Share Posted September 10, 2012 While I'm here - In my mind's eye, I just can't reconcile the Space Wolves and Nurgle. Perhaps the Iron Warriors might take their place? (Which would be kinda cool.) Personally, the Wolves seem very much like an 'Undivided' faction if they were to fall. Yes, they fell to Khorne in the Dornian Heresy and that would seem the only patron that would be an 'easy' fit for them but I just have trouble for them to become entralled to any other major chaos god. The only other choice that would be apparent would be Malal... Slaaneshi Space Wolves - you know you want to! ;) Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/260606-the-alpharius-heresy-v03-updated-111/#findComment-3171761 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Aegnor Posted September 10, 2012 Share Posted September 10, 2012 Apologies to go off topic for a second, but I'm actually now trying to seriously work out Slaaneshi Space Wolves. Of all the Chaos cults, I reckon Slaanesh is the most frequently boringly pigeon holed into one archetype. Not all Slaanesh followers are androgynous, make-up-smeared BDSM freaks, anymore than all Khorne worshippers are Berserkers. Many are, but not all. (Pyroriffic (Sarah Cawkwell wrote an interesting and atypical Slaanesh follower in "Valkia") Space Wolfs place great value on renown and charisma. They believe they can dare what others can't. They love to feast. They have a savage side they sometimes long to release. I think a really good author could write a quite interesting account of Slaanesh following Space Wolves. Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/260606-the-alpharius-heresy-v03-updated-111/#findComment-3171765 Share on other sites More sharing options...
MooFreaky Posted October 30, 2012 Author Share Posted October 30, 2012 Ahoy, I have made a significant update. I have update to Version 0.2. I have updated the OP and Post 3 (I am keeping the more fleshed out stuff in Post3) Future, minor, updates will see the changes added in posts as well, just to make things easier to follow. Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/260606-the-alpharius-heresy-v03-updated-111/#findComment-3223914 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Olis Posted October 30, 2012 Share Posted October 30, 2012 Just thought I'd bring your attention to a similar project here. Maybe you could both pool your resources? I think with more input you could both put in, the further you both might get on this. :P Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/260606-the-alpharius-heresy-v03-updated-111/#findComment-3224301 Share on other sites More sharing options...
MooFreaky Posted November 1, 2012 Author Share Posted November 1, 2012 Updated... Check the OP! Added in an overview, covering all the Legions. Moved the more expanded fluff to Post 3. Hoping this will give people more ability to chime in with ideas, likes, dislikes, ways to expand it, fill in the gaps (especially the stuff later on) and so forth. Please add in your thoughts! Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/260606-the-alpharius-heresy-v03-updated-111/#findComment-3226350 Share on other sites More sharing options...
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