Blood Hounds

[Grand Master Aldric]

Blood Hounds

updated.

[Grand Master Aldric]

blood hounds  fixed

again.. This is getting old.

[Ace Debonair]

What's getting old?

EDIT:

I'm guessing you mean the lack of other folks' posts.

The best way to generate interest in your work is to help other people out with theirs, so I'd totally recommend reading a few of the other Chapters floating around at the moment and maybe offering advice if you've got any to offer.

It might also give you some good ideas on how to improve your own work. It's a win-win!

But if it's advice right now that you're after, I'd say drop most of the pictures - they kinda clutter the thread a bit.

We only need to see what the average marine in your Chapter looks like, not every single variation of every single thing.

Second, go and read the DIY guide, and follow the advice in there. I'm not kidding, it'll help!

[Grand Master Aldric]

What's getting old?

EDIT:

I'm guessing you mean the lack of other folks' posts.

The best way to generate interest in your work is to help other people out with theirs, so I'd totally recommend reading a few of the other Chapters floating around at the moment and maybe offering advice if you've got any to offer.

It might also give you some good ideas on how to improve your own work. It's a win-win!

But if it's advice right now that you're after, I'd say drop most of the pictures - they kinda clutter the thread a bit.

We only need to see what the average marine in your Chapter looks like, not every single variation of every single thing.

Second, go and read the DIY guide, and follow the advice in there. I'm not kidding, it'll help!

no thats not getting old what is getting old is the amount of times i edit these guys.

blood hounds changed again.

[Grand Master Aldric]

Blood hounds updated.

[Doctor Perils]

Hi, first of all, well done for staying with these guys, they've got some potential !

Unfortunately, a lot of people might be finding it a bit difficult to read because of how condensed your text is ; rather than taking the time to read it, they're probably just skipping it. Also, putting a lot of the pictures in spoilers means that they're not taking up as much space in the post.

I've tried to space your post out a bit, and I think you'll find it a lot nicer to read, without even going into the actual content. I've also tried to fix some grammar and spelling, including the names (like Lynn Elgonsen is really spellt Lion El'Jonson) :

http://i1316.photobucket.com/albums/t620/SAKAGE1/spacemarine_zps9d224a2c.jpg tactical marine .

http://i1316.photobucket.com/albums/t620/SAKAGE1/bloodhoundtechmarine_zps6e4caa5c.jpg tech marine

http://i1316.photobucket.com/albums/t620/SAKAGE1/blooodhoundlibby_zps6a2a9553.jpg librarian

http://i1316.photobucket.com/albums/t620/SAKAGE1/bloodhoundreconmarine_zpsa46bc851.jpg recon.

http://i1316.photobucket.com/albums/t620/SAKAGE1/bloodhoundmedic_zpsb9f35ab9.jpg medic.

http://i1316.photobucket.com/albums/t620/SAKAGE1/bloodhounddevastator_zps6a433438.jpg devastator.

http://i1316.photobucket.com/albums/t620/SAKAGE1/bloodhoundchaplin_zps17136c39.jpg​ Chaplin.

http://i1316.photobucket.com/albums/t620/SAKAGE1/bloodhoundassaultmarine_zps9bc65ce2.jpg assault marine.

http://i1316.photobucket.com/albums/t620/SAKAGE1/vet_zps10681190.jpg veteran

Symbol:

http://i1316.photobucket.com/albums/t620/SAKAGE1/BLOODHOUNDSYMBOL_zps5440134b.jpg

Basic information - BLOOD HOUNDS

• Founding : Second (suspected)
• Gene-Seed : Lion El'Jonson
• Successors of : Dark Angels
• Chapter Master : Sakage the Reformer
• Battle Cry : "For the Imperium, for the Primarch and for the Chapter!" They then howl like dogs
• Main Colours : Black and Red
• Full Strength : 1460
• Current : Unknown
• Specialties : Close combat and Stealth
• Tactics : Stealth (incl. Cameleoline and Refractor Fields)
• Known Descendants : Doom Angels
• Beliefs : Protection of Humanity, Eventual destruction of the enemies of Humanity
• Favoured Equipement : Mk 6 "Corvus" Power Armour, retractable monofilament claws
• Worlds :
  • Kardon : Temperate flat green planet, site of the larger of the 2 fortress-monasteries
  • Ardon : Sister planet of Kardon, site of the smaller fortress-monastery (in the planet's largest canyon), grey mountains and jungle

http://i1316.photobucket.com/albums/t620/SAKAGE1/Warhammer_40K_Galaxy_Map_by_ikkaan_zps91b8ce44.jpg

History

The Blood Hounds are a mysterious chapter indeed : all that is known about them is that they may be a 2nd Founding Unforgiven chapter, descended from the Dark Angels, charged with hunting down the fallen. It is also said that the Blood Hounds were formed to eliminate all warriors of chaos.

Though they are mysterious, they are one of the friendliest to mortals in this region. Whole companies of Blood Hounds have been known to sacrifice themselves to protect civilians.

Known only to marines of t the space marines attacked the he blood hounds it is said that after the chapters founding the chief apothecary figured out how to make female space marines something the emperor did not want. Respecting the emperors wishes he did not show his finding to the chapter master. Shortly afterwards he was killed trying to save a marine from a chaos terminator. But now his research has surfaced and there are female space marines. Is believed that newest chapter master implemented it after coming across it in the chapter house grand library were all the information that that the blood hounds can find. Weather it be top secret or the random rumors going a round.

One may think that only marines of the chapter are allowed in the grand library, but in fact, the whole chapter house is open to almost everyone. The chapter house is a gigantic fortress that is made to serve as a shelter for the entire population in times of invasion.

The chapter entirely rejects servitors on the basis that robots are not trustworthy : ships are run by volunteers from the planetary defense forces, and combat vehicles are piloted by space marines.

The chapter also frowns upon bionics so much that they go and find hereteks that know how to regrow flesh, promising them protection from the Adeptus Mechanicus.

Scouts in the blood hounds wear the full power armour like the rest of the chapter.

The chapter also frowns upon removing one's helmet in combat.

Once the chapter has won a planet from heretics or aliens, they work on upgrading it to standards rarely seen outside the realm of Ultramar.

Recruitment

Ultramarine style recruitment.

When the trainee and aspirant is 13, he - along with 9 others - is knocked out and awoken in some harsh terrain on the planet. They are left with a slide recording that tells them that they are being chased by chaos marines, and that they have to evade them and get to the Storm Raven. Actually, the "Chaos Marines" are really Blood Hounds in disguise, only shooting them with stun rounds.

Relations

Enemies in the Imperium are :

• Administratum,
• Inquisition,
• Iron Snakes,
• Storm Wardens,
• Terran Sisters of Battle (blood hounds can tolerate non-terran sisters because they will fix things and would have just killed the flesh tears instead of leaving.)

Main enemies :

• chaos
• dark eldar
• tyrannids.

Xenos Pact :

the Blood Hounds have a pact with Ulthwë, who taught them to make plasma weaponry that does not explode.

Battles

The Blood Hounds have fought in the 1st, 4th, 5th, 6th, 8th, 10th and 13th most of the Black Crusades, and were present when the swooping hawks turned traitor. Although records were wiped, there is truth behind the rumor that a Company of Blood Hounds fought during the Badab war on the side of the Astral Claws.

The Blood Hounds' home world was once invaded by the Dark Eldar.

The Blood Hounds were in the battle in which space marines attacked vandire.

The Blood Hounds were also at Commorragh when the strike cruiser was captured.

Organisation

There are 13 squads per company, which include a 10 man command squad.

Transport :

The first company rides in Storm Eagles, and the rest of the chapter rides in Storm Ravens.

All squads ride in Land Raiders.

Terminators are fielded as ten man squads.

Reserve companies :

• 6th : tactical company,
• 7th : devastator,
• 8th : marines with boarding shields and special weapons,
• 9th : assault
• 10th : sniper squads.
• 11th : vehicles with centurions.

Battle company composition :

• command squad
• 6 tactical squads
• 2 devastator
• 2 assault squads
• 2 sniper squads
• 2 dreadnoughts
• 4 land speeders
• 4 leman russes
• 13 storm ravens
• 23 thunder hawk transporters
• 4 thunder hawks
• 4 storm talons
• 4 whirlwinds,
• 4 predators
• 2 stalkers
• 2 hunters.

Squad break down:

command :

• 1 captain
• 1 lieutenant
• 1 standard bearer
• 1 company champion
• 4 apothecaries
• 1 chaplain
• 1 tech marine.

Tactical :

• 1 sergeant
• 1 corporal
• 6 rifle men
• 1 heavy weapon
• 1 special weapon.

Devastator :

• 1 sergeant
• 1 corporal
• 4 special weapons
• 4 heavy weapons.

Assault :

• 1 sergeant
• 1 corporal
• 2 special weapons
• 6 marines with bolt pistols and chain swords.

Recon squads:

• 5 marines with sniper rifles
• 5 marines with bolters.

Centurion:

• 5 centurions.

(notes: all blood hound are recruited for their psychic ability : the blood hounds try to get psychic for the whole chapter only really strong physic get to be librarians.)

Iconography

Sergeants and ranks above all wear dog shaped helmets.

And corporals get laurels.

Helmet Stripes :

• Red : worn by marines and marine officers.
• red with blue line : worn by veterans.
• White : worn by Apothecaries
• Blue : worn by librarians.
• Yellow : worn by tech marines.
• Black : worn by chaplain's .

Beliefs:

In the history of kardon and ardon, it is said that there are 3 spirit animals that watch over them:

• The blood hound is the animal that gather the spirits of of those who die for a good cause in battle and delivers their souls to the Emperor.
• The fire bull gathers the spirits of those who died fighting for a bad cause in battle and lock up their spirits until they are deem worthy to return.
• The star eagle gathers the souls of those that did not die in battle.

Record from inquisitor Vorbins personal audio diary:

''Magos?"

''Yes my lord'?"

''Have you found it?"

''Yes my lord, I have found trace amounts of what indeed appears to be eldar DNA in their gene samples."

''Then it is settled: we must begin Exterminatus procedures at once."

''Agreed my lord...

''My Lord Inquisitor, a ship has just come out of the warp ahead of us. We are hailing, but as of yet no response."

''Damn' they found us."

''Sir, their power charge is increasing their … THEY'RE CHARGING LANCE BATTERIES! ACQUIRE FIRING SOLUTIONS ON THAT SHIP AND==============="

SIGNAL ENDS

So, now let's get to content. I've compiled a list of things that sort of bug me. Some of the things here are repetitions of what other people have written, but its important to take them into account :

• There are no female space marines. Period. I'm sorry, but why do you keep this in here ? It doesn't really add anything to your chapter, and it is already divergent enough with the organisation. If you insist on having girls with your army, try creating some sort of Sisters of Battle organisation : they don't need to be part of the ecclesiarchy, they could be some kind of Auxiliary force, recruited on one of the planets.
• You say that your Chapter Master is called Sakage the Reformer. Why is he known as "the Reformer" ? Is he the one who decided to change the chapter's organisation from a more standard Dark Angels organisation ? Its a cool nickname, so try and find a cool reason for it.
• How do their specialisations (stealth and close combat) come through ? In your organisation section, there aren't that many squads that have close combat weapons, or that many scout squads.
• Why do you want to give them claws ? they aren't normally going to be out of their armour, so they won't be able to use them if they come out of their fingertips.
• Why do they have two planets ? what benefits does it give them ? It could be a good idea, but you have to flesh it out slightly : perhaps one of the planets is their recruitment ground (a feudal world), and the other is their training ground (a death world were aspirants have to reach the bastion to be turned into space marines), as well as their main base ?
• You've got a huge map, but we can't actually see where Kardon is.
• The Hunt for the fallen is only known to the inner circle of the Unforgiven, so you have to change the sentence "all that is known [...] is that they hunt the fallen."
• Why do you leave the whole chapter house open to anyone ? Its not necessarily a bad idea, but you have to give some reasons, and considering its a fortress, it might not be a good idea to let people (that could be spies) roam around everywhere in it. Also, how do they keep an air of mystery if all of their chapter house (including the library) is open to anyone ?
• Space Marines aren't generally "nice" enough to actually sacrifice a whole company for mortals. You have to bear in mind it costs lots of resources just to create ONE space marine, without talking about hundreds of them ! You could tone it down to it being several squads normally, and one extraordinary time when one company sacrificed itself to save a whole hive-world. You have to think that imperials see space marines as being "worth" at least a thousand people
• Servitors are the main workforce of the Imperium.
  • they don't just pilot ships. Since they don't have robotics (they don't even master basic electronics), people use mind-washed augmented "humans" - called servitors - to do the actual work. You'd have to go further into it to find a way of making this work, because I can't see them being able to do pretty much anything without servitors AND robotics.
  • Ships are already manned by "mortal" humans, as well as servitors.
  • On the other hand, you could say that the Blood Hounds PREFER using normal people for most tasks, rather than servitors, even though they are sometimes obliged to.
• Space Marines already pilot their vehicles, and sometimes it even has to be techmarines.
• Apothecaries already know how to regrow flesh without bionics (called "augmetics" in W40k generally), its just more costly. Also, actually trading with Hereteks would make your chapter heretics in their own right, and I don't think that's really what you're looking for.
• Why do scouts wear power armour ? Chapters don't generally trust recruits with such precious relics : pretty much only the Space Wolves, and they're barbarians anyway . Power armour is less stealthy than scout armour, its more costly, and the norm is to give recruits scout armour. If you want to keep this (and, I mean, why not ?) you have to give a reasoning behind it.
  • Also, if you want to give Power Armoured marines sniper rifles, you might want to check out Horus Heresy rules, but you may want to ask your dad before paying that much money.
• I see why you want your chapter to upgrade liberated planets, but you may want to just write it down in your article
• Aspirants aren't supposed to know about chaos space marines or stormravens. And do you knock out EVERY 13 year old guy, or do they come by themselves, or do they fight it out first etc. ?
• Give a couple of reasons for their enmity towards so many imperial institutions. And if you have so many enemies, your chapter is likely to be excommunicated, and therefore attacked by the whole Imperium.
• How did they get into this pact with Ulthwë ? Marines and eldar are incredibly xenophobic and detest each other. The eldar won't teach Imperials about new technology because they plain don't need to or want to. You have to find a really good reason for Ulthwë to deal with the Blood Hounds, and a REALLY good reason to give them any technology. Same would go with the Tau if you don't want the Blood Hounds to join the Greater Good.
• The Ultramarines only have 14 gunships (stormraven and stormtalon) and twelve Land Raiders in their whole chapter (it can be considered that they have more or less the standard amount). Storm Eagles are relics, so you can consider a chapter only having two or three if they're lucky. Most squads therefore can't be mounted in storm eagles, storm ravens or land raiders, they just haven't got enough.
• Why do you want them to have 13 squads per company ?
• Space Marines don't field Leman Russes, why do you want Leman Russes in your chapter ? If you want to have Leman Russes in your army, then consider using them in your PDF.
• Why do you want to put so many people in your command squads ? Wouldn't you also prefer to replace some of those apothecaries with veterans to make it more in line with how many apothecaries there are in a chapter ?
• Devastator Squads don't have 4 heavy AND 4 special weapons. Why would you want to anyway ? It's too costly to have as many upgraded weapons in one squad, considering that you won't be able to use the special weapons until the enemy are a lot closer.
• Only the Grey Knights are a full chapter of psykers, their just aren't enough competent psykers who can also fight well to easily have a full chapter of psykers.

The rest is pretty good and has potential.

PS : Now, please, don't just ignore this post, I've just spent three hours on it for free

[Grand Master Aldric]

Hi, first of all, well done for staying with these guys, they've got some potential !

Unfortunately, a lot of people might be finding it a bit difficult to read because of how condensed your text is ; rather than taking the time to read it, they're probably just skipping it. Also, putting a lot of the pictures in spoilers means that they're not taking up as much space in the post.

I've tried to space your post out a bit, and I think you'll find it a lot nicer to read, without even going into the actual content. I've also tried to fix some grammar and spelling, including the names (like Lynn Elgonsen is really spellt Lion El'Jonson) :

http://i1316.photobucket.com/albums/t620/SAKAGE1/spacemarine_zps9d224a2c.jpg tactical marine .

http://i1316.photobucket.com/albums/t620/SAKAGE1/bloodhoundtechmarine_zps6e4caa5c.jpg tech marine

http://i1316.photobucket.com/albums/t620/SAKAGE1/blooodhoundlibby_zps6a2a9553.jpg librarian

http://i1316.photobucket.com/albums/t620/SAKAGE1/bloodhoundreconmarine_zpsa46bc851.jpg recon.

http://i1316.photobucket.com/albums/t620/SAKAGE1/bloodhoundmedic_zpsb9f35ab9.jpg medic.

http://i1316.photobucket.com/albums/t620/SAKAGE1/bloodhounddevastator_zps6a433438.jpg devastator.

http://i1316.photobucket.com/albums/t620/SAKAGE1/bloodhoundchaplin_zps17136c39.jpg​ Chaplin.

http://i1316.photobucket.com/albums/t620/SAKAGE1/bloodhoundassaultmarine_zps9bc65ce2.jpg assault marine.

http://i1316.photobucket.com/albums/t620/SAKAGE1/vet_zps10681190.jpg veteran

Symbol:

http://i1316.photobucket.com/albums/t620/SAKAGE1/BLOODHOUNDSYMBOL_zps5440134b.jpg

Basic information - BLOOD HOUNDS

• Founding : Second (suspected)
• Gene-Seed : Lion El'Jonson
• Successors of : Dark Angels
• Chapter Master : Sakage the Reformer
• Battle Cry : "For the Imperium, for the Primarch and for the Chapter!" They then howl like dogs
• Main Colours : Black and Red
• Full Strength : 1460
• Current : Unknown
• Specialties : Close combat and Stealth
• Tactics : Stealth (incl. Cameleoline and Refractor Fields)
• Known Descendants : Doom Angels
• Beliefs : Protection of Humanity, Eventual destruction of the enemies of Humanity
• Favoured Equipement : Mk 6 "Corvus" Power Armour, retractable monofilament claws
• Worlds :
  • Kardon : Temperate flat green planet, site of the larger of the 2 fortress-monasteries
  • Ardon : Sister planet of Kardon, site of the smaller fortress-monastery (in the planet's largest canyon), grey mountains and jungle

http://i1316.photobucket.com/albums/t620/SAKAGE1/Warhammer_40K_Galaxy_Map_by_ikkaan_zps91b8ce44.jpg

History

The Blood Hounds are a mysterious chapter indeed : all that is known about them is that they may be a 2nd Founding Unforgiven chapter, descended from the Dark Angels, charged with hunting down the fallen. It is also said that the Blood Hounds were formed to eliminate all warriors of chaos.

Though they are mysterious, they are one of the friendliest to mortals in this region. Whole companies of Blood Hounds have been known to sacrifice themselves to protect civilians.

Known only to marines of t the space marines attacked the he blood hounds it is said that after the chapters founding the chief apothecary figured out how to make female space marines something the emperor did not want. Respecting the emperors wishes he did not show his finding to the chapter master. Shortly afterwards he was killed trying to save a marine from a chaos terminator. But now his research has surfaced and there are female space marines. Is believed that newest chapter master implemented it after coming across it in the chapter house grand library were all the information that that the blood hounds can find. Weather it be top secret or the random rumors going a round.

One may think that only marines of the chapter are allowed in the grand library, but in fact, the whole chapter house is open to almost everyone. The chapter house is a gigantic fortress that is made to serve as a shelter for the entire population in times of invasion.

The chapter entirely rejects servitors on the basis that robots are not trustworthy : ships are run by volunteers from the planetary defense forces, and combat vehicles are piloted by space marines.

The chapter also frowns upon bionics so much that they go and find hereteks that know how to regrow flesh, promising them protection from the Adeptus Mechanicus.

Scouts in the blood hounds wear the full power armour like the rest of the chapter.

The chapter also frowns upon removing one's helmet in combat.

Once the chapter has won a planet from heretics or aliens, they work on upgrading it to standards rarely seen outside the realm of Ultramar.

Recruitment

Ultramarine style recruitment.

When the trainee and aspirant is 13, he - along with 9 others - is knocked out and awoken in some harsh terrain on the planet. They are left with a slide recording that tells them that they are being chased by chaos marines, and that they have to evade them and get to the Storm Raven. Actually, the "Chaos Marines" are really Blood Hounds in disguise, only shooting them with stun rounds.

Relations

Enemies in the Imperium are :

• Administratum,
• Inquisition,
• Iron Snakes,
• Storm Wardens,
• Terran Sisters of Battle (blood hounds can tolerate non-terran sisters because they will fix things and would have just killed the flesh tears instead of leaving.)

Main enemies :

• chaos
• dark eldar
• tyrannids.

Xenos Pact :

the Blood Hounds have a pact with Ulthwë, who taught them to make plasma weaponry that does not explode.

Battles

The Blood Hounds have fought in the 1st, 4th, 5th, 6th, 8th, 10th and 13th most of the Black Crusades, and were present when the swooping hawks turned traitor. Although records were wiped, there is truth behind the rumor that a Company of Blood Hounds fought during the Badab war on the side of the Astral Claws.

The Blood Hounds' home world was once invaded by the Dark Eldar.

The Blood Hounds were in the battle in which space marines attacked vandire.

The Blood Hounds were also at Commorragh when the strike cruiser was captured.

Organisation

There are 13 squads per company, which include a 10 man command squad.

Transport :

The first company rides in Storm Eagles, and the rest of the chapter rides in Storm Ravens.

All squads ride in Land Raiders.

Terminators are fielded as ten man squads.

Reserve companies :

• 6th : tactical company,
• 7th : devastator,
• 8th : marines with boarding shields and special weapons,
• 9th : assault
• 10th : sniper squads.
• 11th : vehicles with centurions.

Battle company composition :

• command squad
• 6 tactical squads
• 2 devastator
• 2 assault squads
• 2 sniper squads
• 2 dreadnoughts
• 4 land speeders
• 4 leman russes
• 13 storm ravens
• 23 thunder hawk transporters
• 4 thunder hawks
• 4 storm talons
• 4 whirlwinds,
• 4 predators
• 2 stalkers
• 2 hunters.

Squad break down:

command :

• 1 captain
• 1 lieutenant
• 1 standard bearer
• 1 company champion
• 4 apothecaries
• 1 chaplain
• 1 tech marine.

Tactical :

• 1 sergeant
• 1 corporal
• 6 rifle men
• 1 heavy weapon
• 1 special weapon.

Devastator :

• 1 sergeant
• 1 corporal
• 4 special weapons
• 4 heavy weapons.

Assault :

• 1 sergeant
• 1 corporal
• 2 special weapons
• 6 marines with bolt pistols and chain swords.

Recon squads:

• 5 marines with sniper rifles
• 5 marines with bolters.

Centurion:

• 5 centurions.

(notes: all blood hound are recruited for their psychic ability : the blood hounds try to get psychic for the whole chapter only really strong physic get to be librarians.)

Iconography

Sergeants and ranks above all wear dog shaped helmets.

And corporals get laurels.

Helmet Stripes :

• Red : worn by marines and marine officers.
• red with blue line : worn by veterans.
• White : worn by Apothecaries
• Blue : worn by librarians.
• Yellow : worn by tech marines.
• Black : worn by chaplain's .

Beliefs:

In the history of kardon and ardon, it is said that there are 3 spirit animals that watch over them:

• The blood hound is the animal that gather the spirits of of those who die for a good cause in battle and delivers their souls to the Emperor.
• The fire bull gathers the spirits of those who died fighting for a bad cause in battle and lock up their spirits until they are deem worthy to return.
• The star eagle gathers the souls of those that did not die in battle.

Record from inquisitor Vorbins personal audio diary:

''Magos?"

''Yes my lord'?"

''Have you found it?"

''Yes my lord, I have found trace amounts of what indeed appears to be eldar DNA in their gene samples."

''Then it is settled: we must begin Exterminatus procedures at once."

''Agreed my lord...

''My Lord Inquisitor, a ship has just come out of the warp ahead of us. We are hailing, but as of yet no response."

''Damn' they found us."

''Sir, their power charge is increasing their … THEY'RE CHARGING LANCE BATTERIES! ACQUIRE FIRING SOLUTIONS ON THAT SHIP AND==============="

SIGNAL ENDS

So, now let's get to content. I've compiled a list of things that sort of bug me. Some of the things here are repetitions of what other people have written, but its important to take them into account :

• There are no female space marines. Period. I'm sorry, but why do you keep this in here ? It doesn't really add anything to your chapter, and it is already divergent enough with the organisation. If you insist on having girls with your army, try creating some sort of Sisters of Battle organisation : they don't need to be part of the ecclesiarchy, they could be some kind of Auxiliary force, recruited on one of the planets.
• You say that your Chapter Master is called Sakage the Reformer. Why is he known as "the Reformer" ? Is he the one who decided to change the chapter's organisation from a more standard Dark Angels organisation ? Its a cool nickname, so try and find a cool reason for it.
• How do their specialisations (stealth and close combat) come through ? In your organisation section, there aren't that many squads that have close combat weapons, or that many scout squads.
• Why do you want to give them claws ? they aren't normally going to be out of their armour, so they won't be able to use them if they come out of their fingertips.
• Why do they have two planets ? what benefits does it give them ? It could be a good idea, but you have to flesh it out slightly : perhaps one of the planets is their recruitment ground (a feudal world), and the other is their training ground (a death world were aspirants have to reach the bastion to be turned into space marines), as well as their main base ?
• You've got a huge map, but we can't actually see where Kardon is.
• The Hunt for the fallen is only known to the inner circle of the Unforgiven, so you have to change the sentence "all that is known [...] is that they hunt the fallen."
• Why do you leave the whole chapter house open to anyone ? Its not necessarily a bad idea, but you have to give some reasons, and considering its a fortress, it might not be a good idea to let people (that could be spies) roam around everywhere in it. Also, how do they keep an air of mystery if all of their chapter house (including the library) is open to anyone ?
• Space Marines aren't generally "nice" enough to actually sacrifice a whole company for mortals. You have to bear in mind it costs lots of resources just to create ONE space marine, without talking about hundreds of them ! You could tone it down to it being several squads normally, and one extraordinary time when one company sacrificed itself to save a whole hive-world. You have to think that imperials see space marines as being "worth" at least a thousand people
• Servitors are the main workforce of the Imperium.
  • they don't just pilot ships. Since they don't have robotics (they don't even master basic electronics), people use mind-washed augmented "humans" - called servitors - to do the actual work. You'd have to go further into it to find a way of making this work, because I can't see them being able to do pretty much anything without servitors AND robotics.
  • Ships are already manned by "mortal" humans, as well as servitors.
  • On the other hand, you could say that the Blood Hounds PREFER using normal people for most tasks, rather than servitors, even though they are sometimes obliged to.
• Space Marines already pilot their vehicles, and sometimes it even has to be techmarines.
• Apothecaries already know how to regrow flesh without bionics (called "augmetics" in W40k generally), its just more costly. Also, actually trading with Hereteks would make your chapter heretics in their own right, and I don't think that's really what you're looking for.
• Why do scouts wear power armour ? Chapters don't generally trust recruits with such precious relics : pretty much only the Space Wolves, and they're barbarians anyway . Power armour is less stealthy than scout armour, its more costly, and the norm is to give recruits scout armour. If you want to keep this (and, I mean, why not ?) you have to give a reasoning behind it.
  • Also, if you want to give Power Armoured marines sniper rifles, you might want to check out Horus Heresy rules, but you may want to ask your dad before paying that much money.
• I see why you want your chapter to upgrade liberated planets, but you may want to just write it down in your article
• Aspirants aren't supposed to know about chaos space marines or stormravens. And do you knock out EVERY 13 year old guy, or do they come by themselves, or do they fight it out first etc. ?
• Give a couple of reasons for their enmity towards so many imperial institutions. And if you have so many enemies, your chapter is likely to be excommunicated, and therefore attacked by the whole Imperium.
• How did they get into this pact with Ulthwë ? Marines and eldar are incredibly xenophobic and detest each other. The eldar won't teach Imperials about new technology because they plain don't need to or want to. You have to find a really good reason for Ulthwë to deal with the Blood Hounds, and a REALLY good reason to give them any technology. Same would go with the Tau if you don't want the Blood Hounds to join the Greater Good.
• The Ultramarines only have 14 gunships (stormraven and stormtalon) and twelve Land Raiders in their whole chapter (it can be considered that they have more or less the standard amount). Storm Eagles are relics, so you can consider a chapter only having two or three if they're lucky. Most squads therefore can't be mounted in storm eagles, storm ravens or land raiders, they just haven't got enough.
• Why do you want them to have 13 squads per company ?
• Space Marines don't field Leman Russes, why do you want Leman Russes in your chapter ? If you want to have Leman Russes in your army, then consider using them in your PDF.
• Why do you want to put so many people in your command squads ? Wouldn't you also prefer to replace some of those apothecaries with veterans to make it more in line with how many apothecaries there are in a chapter ?
• Devastator Squads don't have 4 heavy AND 4 special weapons. Why would you want to anyway ? It's too costly to have as many upgraded weapons in one squad, considering that you won't be able to use the special weapons until the enemy are a lot closer.
• Only the Grey Knights are a full chapter of psykers, their just aren't enough competent psykers who can also fight well to easily have a full chapter of psykers.

The rest is pretty good and has potential.

PS : Now, please, don't just ignore this post, I've just spent three hours on it for free

Hello

While i like what you've done with the spoilers and large black things(how do you do those anyway?) there are some issues with the changes. I will aso anwser you questions.(oh and PS: I wrote most of this when i was 11 it's just been edited over time.)

:I spelt Lynn Elgonsen like this for a reason and that is because it is his name in he original Rouge Trader book.

:Female marines ARE possible.http://www.bolterandchainsword.com/topic/287468-woman-in-space-marine-army-is-this-fluff-legit-excuse/

:Still working on the Reformer part.

:As for stealth I mean that use the cameleoline (also in case you did not know refractor fields are just enegey shield and have nothing to do with stealth.) to sneak up into postion and ambush the enemy army.

: The claw are on the outside of the amour.

:The have two planets becuse those two are on the same orbit around the sun.

:I'l fix the map one of these days.

:Well they are a second founding so like all Dark angel second founding that is thier job. Also tha bit very old so I was not qiute in on the fallen being secret.

:Only part of the libray and chapel are open normally.

:Again the part about the company ding is old was changing that about now.

:The Dark Angels get by without servitors.

:The thing about regowing flesh is good I did the thing with hertecks because they are agianst the whole 'man and machine becoming one'(expect thair amour but that is a very touchy subject.

: The reason they all where the armor is because It's kind of silly to not give the new guy armor and have them die off more often.

: As for the training no there is years of schooling before the stormraven thing and that is the final teast before becoming space marines (Also it's a volanteer thing so any 8-12 year old could show up and try out.)

:Ahh the Eldar pact. Well In case you missed it the blood hound are part eldar and even before the knew this they were more tolent towards the light Eldar then most. Oh and the plasma thing? I figure it went somthing like this: The chapter master was on the craftworld talking about chaos matter with farseer when one the marine who acompanied the cghapter master (who happend to have a plasma gun ) got to talking with an Eldar engineer and in the end he showed him things that could be done to keep this very simplist gun from blowing up all over the place.

:We have our own forges so we can make storm ravens and land raiders leman russes ect.

Well there is the extra 2 sniper sqauds then the command making 13.

: We train more apothecaries the most chapters.

: The devastators have the special weapons because there is no special weapon sqaud.

(I really like how you reformated to article BTW.)

[Demus Ragnok]

Dark Angels do use servitors. The codex says so.

[Grand Master Aldric]

Well okay but not in the 2nd edtion angels codex.

[Doctor Perils]

Hello

While i like what you've done with the spoilers and large black things(how do you do those anyway?) there are some issues with the changes. I will aso anwser you questions.(oh and PS: I wrote most of this when i was 11 it's just been edited over time.)

1. :I spelt Lynn Elgonsen like this for a reason and that is because it is his name in he original Rouge Trader book.
2. :Female marines ARE possible.http://www.bolterandchainsword.com/topic/287468-woman-in-space-marine-army-is-this-fluff-legit-excuse/
3. :Still working on the Reformer part.
4. :As for stealth I mean that use the cameleoline (also in case you did not know refractor fields are just enegey shield and have nothing to do with stealth.) to sneak up into postion and ambush the enemy army.
5. : The claw are on the outside of the amour.
6. :The have two planets becuse those two are on the same orbit around the sun.
7. :I'l fix the map one of these days.
8. :Well they are a second founding so like all Dark angel second founding that is thier job. Also tha bit very old so I was not qiute in on the fallen being secret.
9. :Only part of the libray and chapel are open normally.
10. :Again the part about the company ding is old was changing that about now.
11. :The Dark Angels get by without servitors.
12. :The thing about regowing flesh is good I did the thing with hertecks because they are agianst the whole 'man and machine becoming one'(expect thair amour but that is a very touchy subject.
13. : The reason they all where the armor is because It's kind of silly to not give the new guy armor and have them die off more often.
14. : As for the training no there is years of schooling before the stormraven thing and that is the final teast before becoming space marines (Also it's a volanteer thing so any 8-12 year old could show up and try out.)
15. :Ahh the Eldar pact. Well In case you missed it the blood hound are part eldar and even before the knew this they were more tolent towards the light Eldar then most. Oh and the plasma thing? I figure it went somthing like this: The chapter master was on the craftworld talking about chaos matter with farseer when one the marine who acompanied the cghapter master (who happend to have a plasma gun ) got to talking with an Eldar engineer and in the end he showed him things that could be done to keep this very simplist gun from blowing up all over the place.
16. :We have our own forges so we can make storm ravens and land raiders leman russes ect.
17. Well there is the extra 2 sniper sqauds then the command making 13.
18. : We train more apothecaries the most chapters.
19. : The devastators have the special weapons because there is no special weapon sqaud.

(I really like how you reformated to article BTW.)

so for the black things, you use the basic header function :

[basicheader=000000]yourtext[/basicheader]

Now, for the rest, you have to remember that 2nd ed is twenty years old or so ! A lot of things have changed since then, if ever you want to consider this "official canon". If you want it to be considered as if your codex was 2nd ed, a little sign at the top of your original post would be welcome, so that people won't be as shocked by these things. I myself started in 5th ed, so I can't really say anything about 2nd ed fluff.

Also, when I was asking these questions, I was sort of writing them so that you could ask yourself these questions in order to flesh out your chapter, and write the answers in your article.

Anyway I'l try and continue the line of comments (I'll use numbered bullet-points from now on to make it more legible) :

1. Lynn Elgonsen => Lion El'Jonson ? Ok, if you say that's what it was twenty-five years ago, I won't contradict you. Also, I'm not saying that you can't write it like this even in "current canon", you would just need to say that your chapter's beliefs/memories have evolved in different ways to the Dark Angels, so your records aren't spellt the same way.
2. Have you read that thread ? There are ten to twenty fluff veterans that have at least 1000 posts each that are all saying that female space marines ARE NOT POSSIBLE [in the w40k framework], arguing against three people that have nearly 300 posts when combined who say that it is SCIENTIFICALLY POSSIBLE. Please, do not forget that this is more "Space Fantasy" then "Science-Fiction", and that in the framework the Imperium doesn't know about genetics, hormones, natural mutation/evolution or most anything properly scientific. Everything they make work only works using the proper rituals, developped twelve thousand years ago by people who were then killed by intelligent robots... It is generally accepted that the Imperium does not transform women into space marines in the warhammer 40000 universe. If you ABSOLUTELY want to have women marines, then, as Aquilanus said in the other thread, create an Alternate Universe, so post a tag at the top of your OP saying so. The thing is though, WHY do you want women in your chapter ? It doen't add anything that I can see to your fluff, so I don't see why you absolutely want to everyone off just for the fun of it...
3. Good luck ^^
4. Yeah, that's generally what stealth means... Write a little fluff blurb of an example of this ! Because for the moment it doesn't come through !
5. Ok. Same here, write a blurb to give an example of when it was useful once, and probably where this "tradition" started.
6. This does not actually answer any kind of question it seems to me... What you have to answer is why they choose to have two different planets, be they on the same orbit or not, since most chapters only have one.
7. Ok
8. Urm... That doesn't change what I said. Only the inner circle knows about the fallen, even if that's the chapter's overall objective. At least, that's how its been AT LEAST since 4th ed, I don't know about codex "angels of death"
9. Ok. But give a reason to WHY the chapter leaves these open to everybody whereas all other chapters keep these private. Also, pretty much all secrets (except the fallen) are kept in the library usually, so how does your chapter keep its secrets ?
10. Ok
11. If that's what it says in the 2nd ed, ok. Refer to my introduction as to my thoughts on this
12. What on earth are you talking about for hereteks ? For one thing, they all have different beliefs, but I've never heard of them being against augmetics. Have you got a reference ? here are two about them : Wikia, Lexicanum. Granted, they are not the source of all knowledge, but I can't see any mention of them not wanting to bond flesh to the machine.
13. But since they are recruits they won't necessarily know how to fight properly, therefore dying more often then full brothers, and therefore possibly losing, or at least damaging revered suits of power armour... Try and give a fluffy reason as to why they are willing to go against what every other chapter does.
14. So just before being given their power armour ? Why not, I guess...
15. Oh, part eldar. I thought that was a joke. It is a joke right ? Please, PLEASE say its a joke... And no, an eldar and a marine aren't just going to be talking calmly with each other, and a bonesinger isn't just going to show him a piece of technology after talking five minutes with him. Think of it this way : two engineers from rival companies (IRL) are chatting ; do you sincerely believe one is just going to start blurting out trade secrets ? And even that is a bad comparison, because eldar and humans hate each other's guts just for being alien...
16. Urm, yes, you have your own forges. But so do the Ultramarines, and all the other chapters in the Imperium. Except they don't produce that many vehicles, it just isn't physically possible for them. So why could you ? Remember that the Ultramarines are supposed to be the epitomy of what Space Marines can be, so you shouldn't be able to surpass them, except in one or two domains that you specialise in. And you don't specialise in vehicles, you specialise in Stealth and close combat. Also, Space Marines don't usually use Leman Russes, why should your chapter have access to them ? I'm not (totally) against it, but you have to justify it.
17. If you have specialist squads, then you would logically be replacing other kinds of squads. It would only be fair, if you see what I mean.
18. Okay, but why do you train more apothecaries than other chapters ? Again, you have to give a fluffy explanation : ferexample, the Red Scorpions have more Apothecaries than any other chapter. Why? because they place a very high importance on the purity of their gene-seed, and monitor their marines constantly to make sure there are no deffects.
19. There are no special weapon squads with normal space marines either...

In all fairness, a lot of these ideas are pretty good. The problem is, your trying to cramm too many divergences into this chapter to make it work without :cuss ing anybody who's reading it off. People want to read about things that are well constructed and interesting, not OPed to hell and back meaning that "they're stronger than anybody else so there".

Try consider creating a second DIY chapter, that would have a different specialisation, meaning that they could take over some of these divergences from the codex astartes. You could create, for instance, the Blazing Leviathans, that have a specialisation in armoured warfare, who have more than the usual number of tanks, and even field Leman Russes, but the only infantry they field is mechanised tactical squads with more special weapons than the norm. Then you'd have blood hounds, who use stealthy insertions to fight hand to hand to the death, and the Blazing Leviathans who blast away from afar...

But that's just one example.

[Grand Master Aldric]

Blood hound updated (this guy did the new formating http://www.bolterandchainsword.com/user/77459-lord-th%C3%B8rn/)

[Doctor Perils]

That's better already. I see you're still keeping the gurls...

 

Anyway, I forgot to ask : what's this story about the swooping hawks turning traitor ?

[Grand Master Aldric]

That's better already. I see you're still keeping the gurls...

 

Anyway, I forgot to ask : what's this story about the swooping hawks turning traitor ?

1:   I just think being able to recriut bothe genders would help us have an oversized chapter. Just look at the Ultamarine they have a huge area to recriut from but are never at full strength.

2:a story I wrote that has since been lost.

[Doctor Perils]

Well that's the whole point of a Chapter ! They aren't supposed to be oversized, a chapter is not a Legion ! The Inquisition and the wider Imperium actively monitor Space Marine Chapters in the express wish that they do not exceed 1000 marines of the line (at least by too many) because they estimate that if a chapter turns traitor, then more than 1000 marines is too dangerous... If a chapter is codex-divergent or even non-codex adherent, than they will pay even more attention, because there is the perception that they have more chance of turning renegade.

I'd be interested in seeing that story on the renegade swooping hawks, but remember to keep it marine-centric to be allowed on the forum

[Grand Master Aldric]

Well that's the whole point of a Chapter ! They aren't supposed to be oversized, a chapter is not a Legion ! The Inquisition and the wider Imperium actively monitor Space Marine Chapters in the express wish that they do not exceed 1000 marines of the line (at least by too many) because they estimate that if a chapter turns traitor, then more than 1000 marines is too dangerous... If a chapter is codex-divergent or even non-codex adherent, than they will pay even more attention, because there is the perception that they have more chance of turning renegade.

I'd be interested in seeing that story on the renegade swooping hawks, but remember to keep it marine-centric to be allowed on the forum

Aah but you see we were formed to hunt chaos. Actully when I first made these guys with the deathwatch rules their bonus was being harder to corrupt.

Well i was marine centric it was the blood hounds fighting alongside some other marine a bunch of which attacked them during the batlle.

EDIT: First not fist!

[Grand Master Aldric]

Found it! (Darn i was 'swooping eagles' not hawks )

http://www.bolterandchainsword.com/topic/281814-medusa-warriorsswooping-eagles-chaos-space-marine-chapters/?do=findComment&comment=3523878

[Doctor Perils]

The Imperium doesn't give a :cuss about them being harder to corrupt, it is still possible. Emperor ! Pretty much only the Grey Knights have never had a corrupt marine (and even that is OP in my mind), there is always the risk of having a chapter fall to chaos, in fact, ESPECIALLY those that combat (and therefore those that are exposed the most to) Chaos. Two of the Astartes Praeses chapters have been declared Excommunicate Traitoris.

 

Also, Swooping Hawks are an Eldar Warrior Aspect, stay with Swooping Eagles

[Grand Master Aldric]

I know i miremebered. On the suject about Eldar: The wat I saqid they got plasma was joke but being part eldar was not...

[Grand Master Aldric]

Pretty much only the Grey Knights have never had a corrupt marine

UM? BA? Blood Hounds?

[Demus Ragnok]

I know i miremebered. On the suject about Eldar: The wat I saqid they got plasma was joke but being part eldar was not...

Part Eldar as in mutant scum that the Imperium will destroy with extreme prejudice ?

 

That is if humans and eldar are even genetically compatable.

 

Not to mention Eldar view humans as inferior and simple.

[Doctor Perils]

Pretty much only the Grey Knights have never had a corrupt marine

UM? BA? Blood Hounds?

Well, you've just cited the two first founding chapters that I find the blandest and OPed in the fluff, so much that they become absolutely detestable. Also, they are useless examples because they are false (careful, I'm spoiling Ultramarines Movie, Fear to Tread and the Blood Angels story in Hammer and Bolter whose name I can't remember) :

• However bad the Ultramarines Movie was, I think it is still considered canon, and there is clearly an Ultramarine who becomes a Daemon Prince (I think its even the captain). That's the first example that pops into my head but that doesn't mean there are more.
• The Blood Angels had a pretty bad spat on Signus Prime, when you could say that half their legion turned into demented Khorne berzerkers (pretty much), and Captain Leonidas turns to chaos near the end of that story in Hammer and Bolter. And there's also a thing about brother Arkio who was gene-engineered to ressemble the primarch, and ended up dragging a load of Blood Angels to chaos

Are there any veterans that would like to chime ?

[Grand Master Aldric]

 

I know i miremebered. On the suject about Eldar: The wat I saqid they got plasma was joke but being part eldar was not...

Part Eldar as in mutant scum that the Imperium will destroy with extreme prejudice ?

 

That is if humans and eldar are even genetically compatable.

 

Not to mention Eldar view humans as inferior and simple.

 

Fist how would either group know? Second as far as the ligt Eladra are concered really only the Beil-tan think all humans are bad.And yes the are compatable read Worrior Coven By C.S Goto.

[Grand Master Aldric]

Pretty much only the Grey Knights have never had a corrupt marine

UM? BA? Blood Hounds?

Well, you've just cited the two first founding chapters that I find the blandest and OPed in the fluff, so much that they become absolutely detestable. Also, they are useless examples because they are false (careful, I'm spoiling Ultramarines Movie, Fear to Tread and the Blood Angels story in Hammer and Bolter whose name I can't remember) :

• However bad the Ultramarines Movie was, I think it is still considered canon, and there is clearly an Ultramarine who becomes a Daemon Prince (I think its even the captain). That's the first example that pops into my head but that doesn't mean there are more.
• The Blood Angels had a pretty bad spat on Signus Prime, when you could say that half their legion turned into demented Khorne berzerkers (pretty much), and Captain Leonidas turns to chaos near the end of that story in Hammer and Bolter. And there's also a thing about brother Arkio who was gene-engineered to ressemble the primarch, and ended up dragging a load of Blood Angels to chaos

Are there any veterans that would like to chime ?

First I haer the BA book suck(Have nott read them) second my family are big fans of the Ultramirnes movies so i've seen it alot and no the captain is killed and his body is possised by the deamon. sorry for any errors Im in a hurry.

[Grand Master Aldric]

Oh and By the way it's not like the female marine play huge parts in the fluff. Example A what does happen: Sister so-and-so defeated Korne Champion Blah-Blah.(<Could have been done by a Male marine.)

Example B what does not happen: Due having female marine we were able to defeat the Witch King at the Battle of Pellenor Fields.

 

 

 

So you see have female marines affects almost nothing aside from troop numbers.

[Doctor Perils]

I know i miremebered. On the suject about Eldar: The wat I saqid they got plasma was joke but being part eldar was not...

Part Eldar as in mutant scum that the Imperium will destroy with extreme prejudice ?

That is if humans and eldar are even genetically compatable.

Not to mention Eldar view humans as inferior and simple.

Fist how would either group know? Second as far as the ligt Eladra are concered really only the Beil-tan think all humans are bad.And yes the are compatable read Worrior Coven By C.S Goto.

I haven't read Goto's work but I've heard that he's so liberal with the fluff that it's hardly warhammer, let alone canon...

• The Imperium requires regular gene-samples from all its chapters, specifically to verify gene purity, and purge the hell out of any chapter that doesn't pass the tests or comply.
• The eldar are pretty much the most powerful psykers in the Universe. Even though they aren't omniscient, they'd know if someone's messing with eldar DNA (or variant thereof)

No, no. Pretty much every single eldar regards a human - sorry, mon-keigh (pronounced [monkey]) - as worthless, even if they are genetically enhanced : for them, a single eldar life is worth the lives of billions upon billions, trillions of human lives...

More importantly, what does it add to your fluff ? I mean, why do you want to add this specificity (that is non-canon-friendly) to an already specific-heavy chapter ?

Pretty much only the Grey Knights have never had a corrupt marine

UM? BA? Blood Hounds?

Well, you've just cited the two first founding chapters that I find the blandest and OPed in the fluff, so much that they become absolutely detestable. Also, they are useless examples because they are false (careful, I'm spoiling Ultramarines Movie, Fear to Tread and the Blood Angels story in Hammer and Bolter whose name I can't remember) :

• However bad the Ultramarines Movie was, I think it is still considered canon, and there is clearly an Ultramarine who becomes a Daemon Prince (I think its even the captain). That's the first example that pops into my head but that doesn't mean there are more.
• The Blood Angels had a pretty bad spat on Signus Prime, when you could say that half their legion turned into demented Khorne berzerkers (pretty much), and Captain Leonidas turns to chaos near the end of that story in Hammer and Bolter. And there's also a thing about brother Arkio who was gene-engineered to ressemble the primarch, and ended up dragging a load of Blood Angels to chaos

Are there any veterans that would like to chime ?

First I haer the BA book suck(Have nott read them) second my family are big fans of the Ultramirnes movies so i've seen it alot and no the captain is killed and his body is possised by the deamon. sorry for any errors Im in a hurry.

I'm not talking about the most recent book's rules. I've never really liked the fluff behind the Blood Angels, and when they were given the Ward treatment in 5th ed, this dislike turned to hate, just in fluff terms (well, also in rule terms at the time, but that's beside the point).

For the Ultramarines movie, you're allowed to have your own likes/dislikes of course. I'm sorry I misquoted, but in any event, that isn't really the point. I don't think there's a specific quote to say that they don't have any traitors, the Grey Knights do.

Of course, this is all moot when you consider that you are stating that you can create a DIY chapter by quoting the example of TWO of the THOUSAND space marine chapters, who by the way, are the two most remarkable chapters in the whole of the Imperium's History. Especially when considering that you gave these examples to justify having an oversized chapter, and that just a few posts previously, you provided the same example chapter (the Ultramarines) to say that you """needed""" an over-strength chapter... Just sayin'...

Oh and By the way it's not like the female marine play huge parts in the fluff. Example A what does happen: Sister so-and-so defeated Korne Champion Blah-Blah.(<Could have been done by a Male marine.)

Example B what does not happen: Due having female marine we were able to defeat the Witch King at the Battle of Pellenor Fields.

So you see have female marines affects almost nothing aside from troop numbers.

So, if girls don't play an important part in your fluff, why are you adding this non-canon-friendly piece of info in ?

And really, I'm not sure if it really modifies the troop numbers when you consider that single death worlds (so with low population) are sufficient to provide enough male marines for a whole chapter (even an over-strength one like the Space Wolves), and you have two different populated worlds to recruit from : easily enough to provide two chapters worth of male recruits, logically...

PS : I've taken more than an hour to write this post, please don't neglect the work I'm putting in to try and help you develop your fluff so that it will be interesting to anyone that reads it. As Ace Debonair said, I'd recommend you read the article on the B&C on writing DIY articles, as well as the following articles on the Warhammer 40,000 fanon wiki :

• How to make a Space Marine Chapter
• How to write Something Epic
• Things to AVOID in creating a chapter
• How to spot a Mary Sue