The Erinyes Chapter, By the Numbers

[Toeko]

I'll hopefully get to it later today or tomorrow.

 

someone last night decided playing beer pong with vodka was a good idea and I apparently agreed.

[Prefect Apollyon]

Regular Monday night.

[LongGone]

In mother Russia, vodka pongs you.

 

To echo what Prefect said, as soon as its in an IA format its much easier to read and critique. It'll be interesting to see where you take these guys. Welcome to the Liber!

 

...or if this isn't your first, Welcome Back!

[darkangel1030]

I think i like the original color scheme . I'm also a fan of the chapter name, my own DIY is the Sons of Horkos, who is related to the erinyes. I'll be following this thread, cant wait to see how they turn out :) take care

[Sanguine_Knight]

The name is fine with me. I will address the connection of the word Astartes to the goddess Ishtar or Astarte. She was the goddess of war among other things. One can't simply dismiss the connection due to the fact that Astarte was a female. Even though Space Marines are male in origin and appearance, they are basically rendered genderless. They are never referred to as men for they are much more than that. My issues are these:

1. The homeworld. do they draw their recruits from the moons? Its not stated. You mention the peoples of the planets in the system. Are they used in recruitment as well? If so why specify one planet as the homeworld?

2. The Combat doctrine. Its hard for me to believe that all enemies would react the same way to this style of warfare. Orks for example will continue to fight as long as the Warlord is alive, or they will run away choose another boss and regroup for another attack. In the case of multiple ork warbands their may be the possibility of infighting. Tyranids from what I understand will become disoriented with the lack of a sinapse creature, but they would not devour themselves. The taking of trophies is commonplace but the actual wearing of previously corrupted armour is not. Anything corrupted is usually burned, because the only reliable way to cleanse it is with The Emperor's holy flames.

3. You state that the Chapter organization is due to the veneration of elder hunters on the Chapter's homeworld. But you also state that the Chapter's homeworld is a gas giant.

4. It is unclear who the parent chapter is. Only who they trained with. Also. The Carcharodons are very insular and are not friendly with other Chapters. Why are they buddies with your guys? Plus their style of war is very blunt and savage. Do your guys emulate this? The Ultras would not approve if they did. It seems strange that your Chapter would be from Imperial Fist stock and then be trained by the sons of Corax and Guilliman.

4. The mutation in the Occulobe. What is it caused from? Does it degenerate? Does it cause the Chapter to choose mostly night fights? This would be a major factor in the way the Chapter fights, and when it chooses to do so. If it just makes it to where they always have to wear their helmets, I'm afraid that's rather bland.

5. Please don't tell me that the Chapter Master allows his subordinates to deal with in house issues without any input from him. That's just bad leadership. If the Reclusiarch, The Chief Librarian or maybe the Lord Apothecary were involved I would understand but still the Master must be involved in all things.

 

I'm fine with the fact that they were created to combat threats on the edge of Imperial space, and I like that they are sympathetic to the plight of regular humans. the rest needs some tweaking imho.

[Veteran Sergeant]

I had a similar thought to SK up there. The Space Sharks are big antisocial jerks. I don't really see them being a training cadre. They seem to barely tolerate working with other chapters, let alone in a close relationship. If they were to have a successor, they'd probably be the deadbeat dad of parent chapters. And there's a certain disconnect between having the ultra-professional Ultramarines paired up to foster a chapter with one of the more savage, unrestrained chapters. I don't know if it would really be an issue of approval, more of just conflicting styles of leadership and warfare that could be potentially counterproductive when trying to combine them. Just something to consider. If you want a savage chapter, maybe use the Mortificators? They're both savage, and Ultramarines, lol. Probably, like the Space Sharks, they are unlikely to be used as a progenitor chapter, but they're not totally out of the question either. Anywho, a thought. Right now you have Imperial Fists successors who were trained by the Ultramarines and some lunatics. Probably need to consolidate that down to a single chapter/geneseed. Are you doing this for the sake of what Chapter Tactics to use on the tabletop? If so, you're doing way too much work. The Chapter Tactics are arbitrary rules that are five months old. Play the game how you want, write the fluff the way you want. Don't worry about writing your fluff to adhere to the game rules. They're just going to change again anyway, lol.

Plus, the Space Sharks also conflict with your idea of being decent, human-loving dudes. Remember, the Space Sharks murdered an entire world lol. "Hey Space Sharks, can you go strike at the planetary infrastructure to hamper reinforcements?" "Sure thing. One sabotaged planetary reactor, coming up. Peace out, bitches!"

 

 

I don't have an issue with the Occulobe mutation forcing them to wear helmets most of the time. It doesn't have to be an overly defining, heavy-handed trope. They don't see so well when it's bright out, so they wear their helmets. I think the fluff about the dimly lit chapter spacecraft is cool, and sufficiently fleshes out that bit of the fluff. Never be worried about being too bland, lol. It's much better than being too silly. You can add salt to a meal. It's much harder to take it out. Never overdo a trope.

 

 

Combat doctrine seems a bit weird. It seems like it might work against some foes, but not others. And it seems to contradict itself. Do they prefer terror tactics centered around striking at the enemy's support structure and causing it to collapse on itself, or are they inclined towards decisive strikes to avoid protracted campaigns? Because those two ideas don't mesh.

 

 

Not venerating the Emprah as a god doesn't really cause any special friction with the Eclessiarchy unless the chapter specifically antagonizes them. Space Marines, as a general rule, don't worship the Emperor, and the Eclessiarchy more or less knows this.

 

 

Why don't they talk? Their Chapter Master is named "The Silent" and they only use pre-recorded battle cries. Did I miss this part?

[Sanguine_Knight]

I will concede to your point about the Occulobe, Veteran Sergeant.