Sons of Agamand - WIP DIY Chapter

[Nemesor]

Hey all, so I'm working on a new DIY Chapter after a long break from 40k, and in retrospect not being very happy with my previous attempts for various reasons. I'm still stuck on my big love for knightly orders and paladin imagery and so on, so the chapter is still very much 'Crusaders in SPAAAACE', but I've got more of an actual story to tell this time, and I think they much better reflect the tone of the 40k setting than my previous efforts:

 

The Sons of Agamand

 

 

What I'm unsure about:

 

I'm not certain on lineage yet (as long as their geneseed's not overly flawed it won't really affect my intended story arc) Ultramarine/Imperial Fists gene-seed most likely (Don't roll your eyes at me dammit!). I know they're both really overused, but Ultraspawn are supposed to be everywhere according to lore, and I can just about bear these dudes being descended from Grandpapa Smurf. Dorn makes sense for these type of crusader chapters as it's a pretty common theme in Fists successors, so it's easy to explain how their culture came about by interacting with other Dorn-descended chapters. Plus, they're mostly solid geneseed sources, barring the non-functional implants of Dorn's progeny, so any flaws I introduce are my own to create.

 

I thought about Dark Angels, but you have the whole Fallen thing, and the story direction I wanted to take these guys in would make them look EXTREMELY hypocritical if they were Unforgiven. Everyone would be asking me why my dudes aren't a bunch of violent, tribal speed-freaks if I went for the White Scars, and the flaws of Raven Guard and Salamanders geneseed didn't really appeal to me as far as this idea is concerned. Iron Hands successors don't fall very far from the proverbial tree from what I've seen and they're all somewhat unlikable borg-marines as far as I am aware, which again is not where I wanted to take these guys thematically speaking. I don't want all the baggage that comes with Sanguinius' lineage. Not doing Wolves for obvious canonical reasons. I wanted to use a less common geneseed, but I don't feel it suits the theme I'm going for to use one of the more esoteric lineages atm. I would be happy to be convinced otherwise, however.

 

Chapter name is taken from either first Chapter Master or an ancestral Space Marine hero from somewhere back in their geneseed's lineage (a la Sons of Orar), either from their First Founding chapter or the chapter they were directly created from (this can be elaborated more once I've firmly decided on a geneseed source). He was particularly heroic and righteous, and heavily inspired the chapter in its infancy, etc.

 

You will also notice 'the X chapter' referenced down below. This is because I have no idea which chapter to select here. I am always hesitant to touch canonical chapers in my work, purely because if GW suddenly decides to elaborate on them, my work can become invalid, and also because I don't want to conflict with what other fans may have written about them. I don't really feel like inventing a whole new chapter just to get into a fight with the Sons of Agamand on Ghurnath Prime. The incident was in M36, however, so historically it'd need to be a chapter that was around at that time. If any of you guys have any suggestions, let me know. Hell, I wouldn;t mind crossing over with one of your DIY chapters for a bit of mutual story development  if anyone's interested. It will involve deaths on both sides in considerable numbers.

 

The stuff I am more sure about:

 

These guys were from a relatively early founding (Some time around M33/34), and initially settled on a world named Amradoth in the native tongue (Imperial designation: Jorn V). The planet is a temperate world that was at a feudal level of technology when the Imperium arrived to reclaim it. They were brought up to more 'modern' levels of technology, but culturally they retained many of their feudal nuances, including rival noble houses owning almost all property on the planet and warring amongst each other. On most 'civilised'  Imperial worlds this would be considered unacceptable disruption of order, and there would long ago have been forcible regime changes to bring Jorn V into line with the Imperium's ideals. But as an Astartes homeworld, Jorn V was exempt from Imperial tithes and required only to provide recruits for their Astartes castellans. The Sons of Agamand allow the wars of the nobles to continue as it keeps the populace fit for battle, ready to aid in the defense of their own homeworld as well as provide strong youths for potential recruitment. The people of Amradoth are also highly religious, having taken to the Imperial Creed with gusto when the first of the Missionaria Galaxia arrived, unfortunately this belief has over the centuries trickled into the chapter, and they hold an unusual reverence for the Emperor by Astartes standards, and the discussion of His divinity is a murky topic amongst the Chaplains of the Sons of Agamand.

 

So these guys get at least some of their culture from the people they recruit from. That being a feudal culture, children start taking on adult responsibilities much earlier, and as such 'youths' of recruitment age will be much more strongly instilled with the ideology of their people than many other worlds would. For some reason (perhaps considering it immoral, I'm not too sure canonically how common this is amongst Astartes chapters on the whole) the chapter do not mindwipe their recruits before training begins, which is asking for trouble, really.

 

So these guys became a bunch of pious dudes with a sort of subconscious favour to recruits of noble lineage (much of their upper echelons end up being staffed by sons of noblemen). They ended up a bunch of holier-than-thou Templar-types, guided by arrogant and entitled nobles. They had a very ostenatious heraldry, too:

 

http://i1101.photobucket.com/albums/g431/Tuskbreaker/Sarj.jpg

 

But the entitled and arrogant leaders of the chapter, who live in unseemly luxury inappropriate for Astartes warriors, slowly succumb to corruption through their own hubris and feelings of superiority. Around M36, the Chapter Master of the time, Daelas Greyholm, was inducted into a strange cult on a remote Imperial world. In secret, he turned much of the upper echelons of the chapter to the twisted faith of this cult, and they began to further corrupt those subordinate to them. Those descended from noble stock fell more easily, but they brought with them many low-born battle-brothers who were too weak-willed to resist their superiors' urging. Unbeknownst to the battle-brothers outside the cult, the chapter had become ruled by Slaaneshi worshippers. The Sons of Agamand began ignoring pleas for help, lending aid only in the places that would garner the most attention, and deploying in excessive force to impress their allies. The chapter were gaining a reputation as gloryhounds amongst their allies. During a joint-forces operation on Ghurnath Prime, the Sons of Agamand met a group of warriors who would not so readily turn a blind eye to their behaviour.

 

Ghurnath Prime was a major hive world, supplying huge numbers of recruits to the Sector's Imperial Guard, as well as being an industrial giant in their sub-sector. When it came under attack by the forces of Chaos in a Black Crusade, the Sons of Agamand were one of three Astartes chapters to lend their aid. The other two chapters were the Imperial Paladins, who deployed barely a full company; and the X chapter, who deployed three companies, a force slightly smaller than that deployed by the sons of Agamand, under the command of Chapter Master Greyholm himself.

 

There were a series of battles where Imperial forces found themselves beleaguered by the enemy and in desperate need of relief, when the Sons of Agamand miraculously came to their rescue. At first, they were hailed as heroes, but Captain Y of Chapter X began to suspect this was more than coincidence. As it turned out, Greyholm had been holding his troops back until allies had weakened their enemies and in turn taken some punishment before arriving in force to destroy the enemy. In the name of glory and adulation, Greyholm was allowing his allies to stand alone before the enemy's guns so that he might play the hero. Captain Y only had his suspicions, however, and merely settled for spreading mistrust towards the Sons amongst the Imperial defenders.

 

But a pivotal battle arrived with the activation of a daemon gate several months into the campaign. Greyholm allowed the Imperial Paladins and Chapter X along with a sizeable Imperial Guard force to bear the brunt of the daemonic assault while his warriors deployed at the daemon gate itself by thunderhawk insertion, where they destroyed the gate. The other Imperial forces were saved, but the Guard suffered extreme casualties, and the Imperial Paladins had lost several ancient dreadnoughts in the battle. Captain Y confronted Greyholm at the next tactical briefing and called him out as gloryhound and a reckless commander. He accused him of arrogance, and putting his own troops before his allies.

 

A duel was called to settle the dispute, and Captain Y was victorious. This shamed the Sons of Agamand greatly, and Greyholm stepped down from overall command, soon pulling his forces out, citing a need to attend to a more pressing matter. The duel was known only among the members of the cult within the Sons of Agamand, and it was simple for them to persuade the rest of the chapter that Chapter X had grievously wronged them on Ghurnath Prime. A retributive strike was carried out against Chapter X, and an all-out war ensued. Chapter X's Chapter Master was slain early in the fighting, but Chapter X soon rallied its scattered forces and, with the aid of other Imperial forces, turned the tide.

 

Captain Y made a return to the conflict, bringing with him disgruntled Imperial Paladins in addition to his own battle-brothers. Captain Y was placed in temporary command of Chapter X due to its chapter master's death. Captain Y hunted down the leaders of the Sons, avenging his lost chapter master. He quickly learned from those he captured that Chaos taint had spread within the Sons, and he made this news apparent to all the Imperial forces. At this point, Inquisition forces became involved, requisitioning more troops to aid in the downfall of the Sons of Agamand. During one battle, a low-born (the only one among the Sons) company champion, sees his captain slain in a duel with Captain Y. This champion calls for mercy from Captain Y when he hears Captain Y's accusations of heresy.

 

It soon becomes apparent that many of the Sons of Agamand are unaware of the truth behind the conflict, and the champion in particular is horrified to learn of the Chaos worship that has corrupted much of the chapter. He pleads with Captain Y for the chance to rally those of his brothers who are still loyal, that they might help bring down Greyholm's traitors. Captain Y agrees, wishing to end the costly conflict as fast as possible - for while the Sons are definitely losing, they have inflicted a heavy toll on the Loyalist forces.

 

Anyway, the rest of the story goes that the champion takes the low-born loyal Sons (maybe a few high-born ones too), and helps Chapter X kill Greyholm and beat the renegade Sons of Agamand. The Sons are left disgraced, severely weakened, and responsible for millions of Imperial deaths, including no small number of Astartes from Chapter X. The Inquisition prepare to pass judgment on the remaining battle-brothers, but Captain Y makes a case for clemency in light of the zealous fury exhibited by the loyalists once they discovered their masters' deception. Not willing to allow the Sons to go unpunished, the Inquisition demand that the Sons of Agamand be stripped of their heraldry, their homeworld, and forced to give much of their wargear to the chapters they had fought against. The champion was ordered to take the chapter master's oath, and lead his chapter on an eternal crusade to atone for their sins. With their heraldry stripped from them, the Sons of Agamand make a drastic change in appearance: The glorious gold decoration on their armour was stripped away, leaving bare ceramite, and the once resplendent turquoise was replaced by a dark red, in memory of the blood they had wrongfully spilled. They end up looking like this:

 

http://i1101.photobucket.com/albums/g431/Tuskbreaker/Veetserge.jpg

 

I intend for there to be a drastic turn in the Chapter's tactics and fortunes at this point. With them striving for repentance, and only finding themselves shamed further and further. They begin to fixate on self-punishment and atonement, becoming a more aggressive, zealous chapter, who start to break away from Codex teachings and become assault specialists. As part of their whole shame thing, they wear cloth of black (possibly including purity seals) rather than the bone colour they once wore, mourning for their lost honour. They also never remove their armour except in private. Since the start of their atonement, no outsider has seen the face of a Son of Agamand.

 

 

Now, obviously, there's a lot of fleshing out to do, but I've covered the big plot point I had in mind, and talked about how both incarnations of the Sons differ in attitude and appearance. Please, feel free to critique any and all aspects of this. I'll defend my decisions if I really feel strongly about them, but I'm happy to hear constructive criticism and ideas from y'all. Rip and tear away, Brothers.

[Conn Eremon]

I'm always intrigued by the idea of people allowing another's DIYs to be a part of their own universe. It's quite the compliment, really. Feel free to use any of mine, if they interest you. The Twenty Articles link in my sig leads to those I have so far submitted to the Liber.

 

As for your DIY, I feel like you might need more to show the renegade status of certain Marines in your Chapter. As it is, the taint just seems kind of tacked onto what would otherwise be a run of the mill encounter between two differently minded Chapters in order to escalate it. I especially would like to see the effects of separation between those are tainted and those who are not, before the actual realization.

[Nemesor]

Yeah, I plan on elaborating upon the corruption and making seem a lot more convincing - in particular how the divide between noble and low-born recruits influenced the development of the chapter, but before I start going off on fine details I wanted some feedback on the initial ideas. Name, colour schemes, geneseed, and whatnot.

[Aegnor]

Nothing eye-roll worthy about your guys being Ultramarine descended. As you say, that should really be the default position.

[Anver Cassiel]

I like it, and would be happy to volunteer my WIP chapter to be chapter X but unfortunately my chapter isn't founded until the 23rd founding (37th millennium). Is the time that this happens to your chapter hugely important? or could it be delayed by 1500 years or so?

[Nemesor]

I will hold off on DIY chapters to play the role of Chapter X until I have developed the Sons of Agamand themselves a bit further.

 

So I'm still torn between Dorn/Guilliman geneseed. I hate all that spiritual liege rubbish, and he has a silly-sounding name, and apparently if a marine Chapter know they are descended from Guilliman, they bang on about him non-stop. Not really into that. But it seems like 70-90% of Dorn successors are Crusaders in SPAAAAAAACE already. And my guys end up being quite similar to the Black Templars in a number of ways... So, not sure if I should try to distance myself from them a bit.

 

The latter-day Sons are probably going to be seriously into punishing themselves, having become obsessed with restoring their lost honour, and preventing further corruption. Brothers who lose their wargear have their weapons chained to their armour, partly so they cannot lose it again, but mostly so all can see them and know of their past failure. They routinely volunteer themselves for torture, as punishment for perceived sins. The shame of their past and the constant reminders of their ancestral sin consume them with shame and a sense of unworthiness. This drives them to perform seemingly insane acts of bravery - they are on an eternal quest to restore their honour. This has led to a heavy preference for melee combat and lightning-fast strikes (drop-pods, teleports, jump packs, bikes, light-armoured transports) - allowing them to quickly and decisively kill (hopefully) the toughest elements of enemy armies. Their tendency to target the most challenging foes has also led to a constantly under-strength chapter. However, many of their surviving troops are individuals of exceptional skill and experience. As of late M41 - only 6 companies are operating even close to normal strength., with 5 captains deceased or missing, and their companies seriously under-strength. Their gene-seed stocks are struggling to keep up with the losses they suffer due to their near-suicidal actions.

 

Thoughts?

[Olis]

So I'm still torn between Dorn/Guilliman geneseed. I hate all that spiritual liege rubbish, and he has a silly-sounding name, and apparently if a marine Chapter know they are descended from Guilliman, they bang on about him non-stop. Not really into that. But it seems like 70-90% of Dorn successors are Crusaders in SPAAAAAAACE already. And my guys end up being quite similar to the Black Templars in a number of ways... So, not sure if I should try to distance myself from them a bit.

 

Being a son of Dorn, in this particular day and age, is very much in vogue. That said, I don't see why you couldn't make them a black sheep version of the Marines Errant, who themselves are descended from the Ultramarines (via the Eagle Warriors). Not everyone has to sing the praises of the Ultramarines. ;)

[Aegnor]

The Mortifactors and Iron Snakes are also both examples of Ultramarine descendants that aren't carbon copies of the Ultras.

[Ace Debonair]

For what it's worth, the DIY Ultramarine successors in the Liber that don't spend all day praising Guilliman vastly outnumber the ones that do.

A knightly Ultramarine successor sounds like a fine idea to me. And since the Emperor is their rightful liege above all, they could focus more on venerating him than Guilliman if so desired.