Index Astartes: Storm Sons

[Dosjetka]

I've finally gotten round to reading your Index Astartes article, Nineswords. Only took me three-and-a-half years. :lol:

 

First off, that very first quote from Oyuu Shah-Khan is great. It really drew me in.

 

Next, what is the Nakarene? It is mentioned at least once but I couldn't locate any explanation about what it was.

 

There is some confusion as to where the main influx of "aspirants" comes from. In the paragraphs where you explain what the Sünsitai is, it is unclear if the influx is from Nakaris itself or from the whole of the Qhwarazheen system? Afterwards you also mention that potentiates are cryogenised and brought back from the whole breadth of the Imperium. I think the information about recruitement needs some consolidation and clarification to make it understandable from the get-go.

 

I like the idea of the chaga but wonder what would happen if a Storm Son suddenly disappeared while undertaking this period of exile. Would the Chapter have knowledge of his disappearence (either through tracking the lone warrior or being in contact with him, somehow)? If the lone warrior encountered a situation that was too great for him to overcome alone would he have a way/be permitted to contact the Chapter to warn then/ask for assistance?

 

Last but not least, how do the Ordus travel around? The Chapter has a limited number of ships and their seems to be a greater number of Ordus than available fleet assets. Do they "hitchhike" on or requisition other Imperial ships passing by to get to their destination? And what about the extraction process if they have no fleet assets available to them? Usually a Space Marine Company will have a Strike Cruiser and escorts assigned to them for the duration of their mission so I'm wondering how the Storm Sons manage to operate with many smaller groups and a similar number of naval assets.

 

Anyway, looking forward to reading part 3 of your Primaris tale and your reply to my post. :)

[Nineswords]

I've finally gotten round to reading your Index Astartes article, Nineswords. Only took me three-and-a-half years.

 

First off, that very first quote from Oyuu Shah-Khan is great. It really drew me in.

 

Next, what is the Nakarene? It is mentioned at least once but I couldn't locate any explanation about what it was.

 

There is some confusion as to where the main influx of "aspirants" comes from. In the paragraphs where you explain what the Sünsitai is, it is unclear if the influx is from Nakaris itself or from the whole of the Qhwarazheen system? Afterwards you also mention that potentiates are cryogenised and brought back from the whole breadth of the Imperium. I think the information about recruitement needs some consolidation and clarification to make it understandable from the get-go.

 

I like the idea of the chaga but wonder what would happen if a Storm Son suddenly disappeared while undertaking this period of exile. Would the Chapter have knowledge of his disappearence (either through tracking the lone warrior or being in contact with him, somehow)? If the lone warrior encountered a situation that was too great for him to overcome alone would he have a way/be permitted to contact the Chapter to warn then/ask for assistance?

 

Last but not least, how do the Ordus travel around? The Chapter has a limited number of ships and their seems to be a greater number of Ordus than available fleet assets. Do they "hitchhike" on or requisition other Imperial ships passing by to get to their destination? And what about the extraction process if they have no fleet assets available to them? Usually a Space Marine Company will have a Strike Cruiser and escorts assigned to them for the duration of their mission so I'm wondering how the Storm Sons manage to operate with many smaller groups and a similar number of naval assets.

 

Anyway, looking forward to reading part 3 of your Primaris tale and your reply to my post.

 

Hey Dosjetka,

 

Thanks! There may be some confusion and I will update the lore properly once I've figured out how they all fit in the new timeline, to answer your questions -

 

- The Nakarene are the indigenous peoples of Nakaris, think the Dothraki from Game of Thrones and the Mongol tribes of the Steppe. The Nakarene also informally refers to the Storm Sons themselves, who have spent time on Nakaris too.

 

- Perhaps my wording is unclear on the next point: Qhwarazeen was the former name of Nakaris. During the Divine Purging, the dynasty was wiped out by an Astra Miltarum purge action with both the White Scars and Storm Lords. It was subsequently turned into the new chapter's home planet. The Storm Sons recruit not only from all of the planets within the Utrar Khanates, but the Imperium as a whole, hence the cryogenic capabilities of any ship used by the Storm Sons. It believes cultural and gene diversity breeds better warriors. This is very much like the Mongols of ancient history. They absorbed the best technological advances and troops from other cultures to fight for them.

 

- Chaya is a spiritual undertaking, first and foremost. Given the vast distances involved, the chapter is not necessarily aware of what happens to every single member of the ordus after they leave Nakaris, they are effectively self contained armies. If within proximity to the chapter system, then I can't see why a lone warrior would not ask the chapter for aid. In most cases though, the Storm Sons (before the current timeline anyway...) are simply too far to call on other Storm Sons, although there are many Astartes, Astra Militarum and Mechanicus allies to call upon if the situation is grave enough. I find the Iron Snakes an inspiration here, for the most part they operate in very small numbers.

 

- Re: Fleet assets. This is correct. The chapter fleets are small in number and have a tendency to lean towards smaller, but fast hunter-destroyer class ships. Ordus of over standard battle company sizes are rare indeed. Most Imperial and Mechanicus ships would have no problem 'lending' their crews shall we say, if transport was necessary. I'm reminded of the Space Marines in Salvation's Reach, who fight alongside the Ghosts, just occupying an underused portion of a ship. If there are no chapter fleet assets available, then Imperial Navy ships are just as good, as they're concerned. It's not perfect but it will do. The Storm Sons are pragmatic like that. If they are stuck somewhere, then, well, they're stuck and measures will be taken to call for aid. In the mean time, there's a planet to purge in the name of the Emperor!

[Dosjetka]

Cheers for the swift reply and clarifications, Nine. :tu:

I'll be back with some more constructive criticism whenever you next update your IA.

[Archivist Thaddeus Kryptem]

@Nineswords I would just like to say that I have thoroughly enjoyed this IA and the story I found both an inspiration to finally write my own IA, although also slightly intimidating :P 

[Nineswords]

I've been focusing my attention of late to Commissar Molotov's most excellent Deathwatch RPG campaign, here's a piece I did especially for my custom character profile, Brother Greysight of the Deathwatch.

 

[Minigiant]

I've been focusing my attention of late to Commissar Molotov's most excellent Deathwatch RPG campaign, here's a piece I did especially for my custom character profile, Brother Greysight of the Deathwatch.

 

Really cool

[Bjorn Firewalker]

When I saw his image in the Hall of Honor, I thought he was a White Scar. His armor is rather dull, the Chapter insignia barely visible. Is he camouflaged? Are the Storm Sons more Reasonable Marines than Angry Marines (see 1d4chan.org for explanations, but beware of NSFW content)?

[Brother Lunkhead]

When I saw his image in the Hall of Honor, I thought he was a White Scar. His armor is rather dull, the Chapter insignia barely visible. Is he camouflaged? Are the Storm Sons more Reasonable Marines than Angry Marines (see 1d4chan.org for explanations, but beware of NSFW content)?

 

I believe he is in Deathwatch armour

[Ashur]

Love it. Love everything about it, specially the way you mix alusions to Genghis Khan all around. There is never too much White Scar Succesor Chapters around.

 

Great work.

[Tarvek Val]

That certainly looks like Deathwatch armor to me.

 

Well done, Brother Nineswords. Excellent work on the Chapter history, I like the idea of a vengeful Chapter of White Scars successors roaming the galaxy and purging the impure in the Emperor's name. The artwork you have provided is top-notch as well 

[Kelborn]

Wait...you did that by yourself?

Tremendous work, brother! Really loving it! :D

 

So you're playing a DW game via this platform, right? Never played DW before but I'm curious about it. ^^

[Nineswords]

When I saw his image in the Hall of Honor, I thought he was a White Scar. His armor is rather dull, the Chapter insignia barely visible. Is he camouflaged? Are the Storm Sons more Reasonable Marines than Angry Marines (see 1d4chan.org for explanations, but beware of NSFW content)?

 

Greysight is of the Deathwatch. I'd encourage you to read the entire thread, but this post sees Greysight receiving his restored armour in Deathwatch coloures.

 

A note to everyone else, thank you guy so much for the encouragement!

Wait...you did that by yourself?

Tremendous work, brother! Really loving it!

 

So you're playing a DW game via this platform, right? Never played DW before but I'm curious about it. ^^

 

Yes, took a few evenings :)

 

We're doing a B&C online narrative of DW RPG, it's super fun and my first go at it.

[Kelborn]

Wow, truly great artwork!

Do you so something like This regulary?

 

Is your team full? Curious if it would be something I'd enjoy.

[Nineswords]

No not really, still have a lot to learn in that department! I'd message Commissar Molotov, but I believe we're full at the moment :/

[Kelborn]

Thanks, Nineswords.

Will have a look on the link you've provided. Maybe there will be a chance in the future.

Currently got two chapters in the making, which I could make use of.

Overall themes: 18th century British Navy (Star Lords) & Eskimo themed chapter of survivalists (current name: Argent Claws)

[Brother Lunkhead]

Brother Nineswords, I'm just staring to realize what a formidable artist you are. I was just reading your post on Greysight receiving his Deathwatch armour. Your prose is excellent sir, descriptive but not ostentatious. I knew your visual art skills were stunning, but I didn't know how marvelous your literary skills were as well. If I hadn't had the particular emotion purged years ago, I would be green with envy! Well done 

[Nineswords]

Thank you very much Brother, it is encouraging that stuff I do in the evenings for fun is read and appreciated. Nowhere near BL standard but I really enjoy the process of writing.

[Brother Lunkhead]

Thank you very much Brother, it is encouraging that stuff I do in the evenings for fun is read and appreciated. Nowhere near BL standard but I really enjoy the process of writing.

 

Hmmm...... I'm not so sure about that. You might consider writing something for them for their next open submission..... just a thought 

[Kelborn]

 

Thank you very much Brother, it is encouraging that stuff I do in the evenings for fun is read and appreciated. Nowhere near BL standard but I really enjoy the process of writing.

 

Hmmm...... I'm not so sure about that. You might consider writing something for them for their next open submission..... just a thought

 

 

Agreed. I'd try the current BL writing competition. You have nothing to lose. :)

https://www.warhammer-community.com/writeforblacklibrary/

[Nineswords]

Another short story as part of my Deathwatch RPG campaign.

 

http://www.bolterandchainsword.com/topic/344357-blackthorn-episode-i-a-world-aflame/?p=5038307

[Brother Lunkhead]

Once again a great read Excellent story with interesting character interaction. I love this type of story that gives us a glimpse into the culture of a Astartes chapter.

 

Just one minor note of constructive (I hope) criticism if you don't mind.... the second and third paragraphs describing the geography and fauna while interesting, detract a little. I see that some of the information is pertinent to the story, the substance could probably be edited down to one or two sentences. If it was a longer story, or novel, lengthy descriptions are more appropriate (James Michener and Tom Clancy devoted almost entire chapters or book sections to this sort of thing), but with very short stories you want to be as succinct as possible. However, it is interesting and useful information in and of itself..... you might consider a separate post with planetary data.

 

Sorry for running on like that..... more than I initially planned to say Bottom line..... great story..... eagerly awaiting more 

[Nineswords]

Once again a great read Excellent story with interesting character interaction. I love this type of story that gives us a glimpse into the culture of a Astartes chapter.

 

Just one minor note of constructive (I hope) criticism if you don't mind.... the second and third paragraphs describing the geography and fauna while interesting, detract a little. I see that some of the information is pertinent to the story, the substance could probably be edited down to one or two sentences. If it was a longer story, or novel, lengthy descriptions are more appropriate (James Michener and Tom Clancy devoted almost entire chapters or book sections to this sort of thing), but with very short stories you want to be as succinct as possible. However, it is interesting and useful information in and of itself..... you might consider a separate post with planetary data.

 

Sorry for running on like that..... more than I initially planned to say Bottom line..... great story..... eagerly awaiting more

 

Cheers for the feedback! That's useful, thanks.

[Nineswords]

It's been a while since I've posted in this thread –– I have in fact been quietly working away updating all of the lore for the Storm Sons to bring them right into the 42nd Millennium which will take the form of a Codex supplement. I've also been commissioning new artworks, like this amazing piece of my Chief Librarian. I'll be updating the lore over the coming weeks!

 

Jelserekh, the Windwaker, Lord of the Tempest. Chief Soulseer of the Eastern Horde.

 

 

Commissioned artwork by Orniris for my Storm Sons chapter (see signature).

[Brother Lunkhead]

Truly excellent work from Orniris It's good to see you and the Storm Sons back Brother Ninesword. I've missed you both. Hopefully, you'll have more content for us soon. 

[Messor]

That's metal as all get out, Nineswords. Looking forward to the new stuff!