Looking for advice/feedback - Worst possible 1000 pt build

[taikishi]

So I found out today that there's a 1000 point "April Fool's" tournament going on tomorrow at our local FLGS. Basically bring 1000 points, CAD or Decurion detachment only, make the army as bad as possible without it being auto-loss (so no null deployment). And there's a good chance we'll be handing our models over to our opponents to let them play the army.

 

Yeah, I know, a little short notice for me and you all.

 

Anyway, I'm looking more for feedback than anything else. Some of my thoughts have included:

 

Canoness HQ bare bones

Close combat command squads with no transports

Celestians (I don't own any Repentia anyway)

Blobs with Rhinos but no upgrades

5-man squads with no transports or upgrades

Flamer/stormbolter Dominion squads with no transports

5-man Seraphim with no hand flamers or other upgrades

5-man Retributors with stormbolters, heavy flamers, or bare bones and no transports (I don't own any Penitent Engines)

 

Any ideas out here - especially concerning troops choices? I want to hear the zaniest ideas you guys can think of or if you think I'm on the right track as is.

[Naminé]

2x Five girl squads with multi meltas and power swords -170

3x Celestians in numbers of 10, again with power swords - 465

2x 5 girl Retributors with multi meltas and power sword- 230

Canoness - with 2x inferno pistols - 95

Priest with power sword -40

 

1000 on the dot

[CaptainHelion]

I think the 5-sister squads with no upgrades or transports are a winner. Maybe load upgrades on the superiors, too.

[taikishi]

That's kind of where I was headed. This is what I came up with. Bear in mind I was also told the following this morning:

 

* List can go over 1000 points but has to be at least 1000

* Only one CAD or Decurion

* Your opponent will be playing your army (ugh)

 

 

Here are two lists I came up with. The second is the one I'll likely play if I have the models to field it, if not it's the first one.:

 

 

095: Canoness w/ Inferno Pistol + Power Sword

170: 2x 5 Celestians, Superior with Chainsword + Plasma Pistol

240: 4x 5 Battle Sisters

115: 5 Serpahim, Superior with Plasma Pistol and Power Sword

170: 2x 5 Dominions with Flamers

210: 2 x5 Retributors with 2 Heavy Flamers, 1 Heavy Bolter, 1 Multi Melta, Superior with Melta Bombs

1000 pts

 

 

095: Canoness with Inferno Pistol and Power Sword

254: 2x 7 Celestians, Superior with Chainsword + Plasma Pistol

300: 4x 5 Battle Sisters, Superior with Power Sword (replaces bolt pistol)

130: 2x 5 Dominions

224: 6 Retributors with 2 Heavy Flamers, 1 Heavy Bolter, 1 Multi Melta

1003

[Blackarmor_redtruth]

If you get this in time, don't forget the ADL with Icarus Lascannon.

[taikishi]

Couldn't get one in time, Blackarmor_redtruth.

 

So, took the first list with some slight modifications because of the fact I actually don't own 4 heavy flamers without sacrificing some of the other weapons due to them being magnetized (a downside to not seeing my army in almost 6 months) so the Retributor squads went 1 heavy flamer, 1 multi melta, 2 heavy bolters.

 

My three games were as:

* Ogryn renegades with six squads of 1 non-scoring Ogryn each with power drills and collars of Khorne (this army ended up 0-3), two level 1 wyches, and an HQ that I know little about other than its special rules benefited nothing vs Tau - two troops of 3 Crisis suits with no guns each accompanied by two drones and a 407 point character who does nothing but run with objectives and two gun drones

Lost 3-2 because the game ended on turn 5 otherwise the Tau would have been tabled as six Ogryns would have charged the warlord.

 

* The above Tau list vs an Inquisitorial detachment with Jokaro, one of the FW special characters, two squads of stormtroopers, and an Acolyte retinue

Got tabled by Inquisition 9-0

 

My final game would have been a bye except the person who was playing as my army was starting to not feel well and bowed out so I ended up playing my army against a synapse-less Tyranid force that was 1-0-1 because it also included Old One Eye, two Harusepx, and a Trygon in a tournament where the only anti-monstrous creatures items were my multi-meltas, plasma pistols and the Jokaero.

 

I lost this game 10-9 because the mission was Bring in the Heavies and both of my Retributor squads died to the Trygon though I did manage to hold up the Haruspexes in close combat for several turns and killed one.

 

As for my army itself.....

 

Well, it wasn't the "most broken". It finished 2-1, beating a different Synapse-less Tyranid army 6-3, the Ogryns 9-0, and the Tyranid list above 10-9. The winning army was, surprise surprise, the monstrous creature army at 2-0-1, with its tie being to the Inquisition and other win against Thousand Sons.

 

Got some compliments for bringing Sisters and because the people who played the list actually got a lot of fun out of it, with one of the players (the Tau player) contemplating a Chaos Counts-as Sisters army (not fallen Sisters as much as a creation of Slaanesh) because she had so much fun playing them.

 

Edit: Correction - beat Ogryns 9-0 in a tabling.

[Blackarmor_redtruth]

That sounds like a blast, thanks for sharing! Where there any fun/defining moments with bad on bad action turned grand?

[taikishi]

Defining moments playing as my Sisters in the last game:

* lots of 1s and 2s on my 3+ armor saves

* failing to wound and kill a lone Hormugant that was engaged in close combat with my Seraphim for two rounds. I probably should have Hit and Run but at the same time it meant they were safe from the Trygon that showed up next turn and the Hormugaunts kept passing Instinctive Behavior at Ld 6 - unlike the monstrous creatures that kept failing and getting something good like Rage or Devour.

* A lone Celestian Superior standing toe-to-toe with a Haruspex for 3 rounds in close combat

* Three of my four Battle Sister Squads failing their Act of Faith roll when targeting Old One Eye/the Trygon

* My canoness doing the same thing without the benefit of Eternal Warrior

* Taking down Old One Eye with Bolters

* Lots of failed charges by the Tyranids

* A Haruspex getting a Precision Shot on my Seraphim with its tongue attack only to have my Superior save her Angelic Visage on the second roll.

* The Sisters vs Nids game going 7 turns. Had the game ended on turns 5 or 6, I would have won 12-2 or 12-3 at worst because the Tyranids wouldn't have had my two objectives in my deployment zone and both of my Retributor squads would still be alive (one contested by Ob Sec battle sisters, the other contested by Retributors.)

 

In the other games I played:

* Ogryns taking more wounds from Drones than Crisis Suits in close combat

* The game above ending on turn 5 - had the game gone to turn 6, the six Ogryns likely would have all gotten charges on the Tau Commander and tabled the Tao

* Deciding to charge Stormtroopers with Crisis Suits, only killing 1 while taking no wounds, and then running them down

* Running down Crisis Suits with Ogryns after winning combat by 2 and one of the two units I was engaged with breaking (6 units of one Ogryn each vs 12 drones, 3 Crisis suits)

* Deep striking the Tau Commander with Precision Deep Strike onto the Inquisition objective in his back field only to have two Jokero lascannon him to death after failing both 4++, scoring both First Blood and Slay the Warlord for the Inquisition.