jacqualine47 Posted January 29, 2017 Share Posted January 29, 2017 My wife and I were playing this game while painting - it was so much fun I wanted to share. The point of the game is to make some sort of strange decision a Hollywood producer might make that should be horrible and ruin the movie, and then make a second statement regarding something that consequently would appear on-screen that makes that decision awesome in spite of itself - try to base it on an actual quote or scene from the novels. I'll start: Cast Samuel L. Jackson as Lorgar "All I ever wanted was the mother :cuss Truth" Cast Christopher Walken as Erebus "No. Davin. Is not... compliant. Lord Horus." Cast Liam Neeson as Garviel Loken "I was never a Son of Horus. I will remain a Luna Wolf, I will find you, and I will serve the Emperor." Cast Robert Downey Jr. as Ignace Karkasy "Always write the truth and then have you review it? Why that's a fine idea, Lord Loken." +Downey Jr. Takes a shot of liquor+ "Why don't I include a bolt shell with my name on it as well. It'd certainly save you a lot of time." Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/330372-30k-hollywood-movie-bad-producer-decisions-game-not-real/ Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brofist Posted January 29, 2017 Share Posted January 29, 2017 Charlie Day as Konrad Curze "Wildcard, bitches! Yee-haw!" Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/330372-30k-hollywood-movie-bad-producer-decisions-game-not-real/#findComment-4637494 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Plasmablasts Posted January 29, 2017 Share Posted January 29, 2017 My brother always envisaged Sean Connery as the Emperor: "Sho, Horush my shon, you have shlain Shanguiniush." Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/330372-30k-hollywood-movie-bad-producer-decisions-game-not-real/#findComment-4637786 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Idomeneus Posted January 29, 2017 Share Posted January 29, 2017 Tom Hardy's Bane as Mortarion. Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/330372-30k-hollywood-movie-bad-producer-decisions-game-not-real/#findComment-4637820 Share on other sites More sharing options...
SalvationOfReason Posted January 30, 2017 Share Posted January 30, 2017 Dwayne 'The Rock' Johnson as Ferrus Manus. Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/330372-30k-hollywood-movie-bad-producer-decisions-game-not-real/#findComment-4637928 Share on other sites More sharing options...
jacqualine47 Posted January 30, 2017 Author Share Posted January 30, 2017 Dwayne 'The Rock' Johnson as Ferrus Manus. I dunno, The Rock might actually be a good choice for Ferrus (the point is to do a bad choice, but then have it be awesome in a terrible way) You forgot the second part of the game - the quote or scene. Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/330372-30k-hollywood-movie-bad-producer-decisions-game-not-real/#findComment-4637931 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Soric Posted January 30, 2017 Share Posted January 30, 2017 How about Jeff Goldblum as the Lion? Don't really have any example lines for him, but I can imagine him sitting with a huge mop of blonde hair as he sits in the corner staring intently like he does in The Fly :D Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/330372-30k-hollywood-movie-bad-producer-decisions-game-not-real/#findComment-4638606 Share on other sites More sharing options...
TURBULENCE Posted January 31, 2017 Share Posted January 31, 2017 Tom Hardy's Bane as Mortarion."No one cared who I was before I put on the gas mask" Channing Tatum as Loken. No line comes to mind but it's still hilarious in my head Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/330372-30k-hollywood-movie-bad-producer-decisions-game-not-real/#findComment-4638874 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Idomeneus Posted January 31, 2017 Share Posted January 31, 2017 Ooh, and Mike Myers as Fulgrim. "Do I make you horny baby, do I make you randy?" Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/330372-30k-hollywood-movie-bad-producer-decisions-game-not-real/#findComment-4638923 Share on other sites More sharing options...
depthcharge12 Posted January 31, 2017 Share Posted January 31, 2017 Taylor Lautner as Russ... "But Magnus...we were always meant to be together! Look at my pecs!" Still a better love story than Twilight. I can hear the screaming in the warp from Wolves fans now :devil: Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/330372-30k-hollywood-movie-bad-producer-decisions-game-not-real/#findComment-4638940 Share on other sites More sharing options...
KBA Posted January 31, 2017 Share Posted January 31, 2017 So actors playing famous characters playing characters of the Horus Heresy? Hayden Christensen as Anakin Skywalker as Horus Lupercal: 'From my point of view the Emperor is evil!!' *shudder* Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/330372-30k-hollywood-movie-bad-producer-decisions-game-not-real/#findComment-4638987 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jarl Kjaran Coldheart Posted January 31, 2017 Share Posted January 31, 2017 So actors playing famous characters playing characters of the Horus Heresy? Hayden Christensen as Anakin Skywalker as Horus Lupercal: 'From my point of view the Emperor is evil!!' *shudder* why? Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/330372-30k-hollywood-movie-bad-producer-decisions-game-not-real/#findComment-4638988 Share on other sites More sharing options...
KBA Posted January 31, 2017 Share Posted January 31, 2017 So actors playing famous characters playing characters of the Horus Heresy? Hayden Christensen as Anakin Skywalker as Horus Lupercal: 'From my point of view the Emperor is evil!!' *shudder* why? Why did I submit you all to that? Or why the shudder -- in which case if I have to explain how bad of writing 'from my point of view the Jedi are evil' combined with Christensen's acting performance, well... Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/330372-30k-hollywood-movie-bad-producer-decisions-game-not-real/#findComment-4638990 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jarl Kjaran Coldheart Posted January 31, 2017 Share Posted January 31, 2017 So actors playing famous characters playing characters of the Horus Heresy? Hayden Christensen as Anakin Skywalker as Horus Lupercal: 'From my point of view the Emperor is evil!!' *shudder* why? Why did I submit you all to that? Or why the shudder -- in which case if I have to explain how bad of writing 'from my point of view the Jedi are evil' combined with Christensen's acting performance, well... Both? Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/330372-30k-hollywood-movie-bad-producer-decisions-game-not-real/#findComment-4639010 Share on other sites More sharing options...
jacqualine47 Posted January 31, 2017 Author Share Posted January 31, 2017 Casting him as Angron would be even worse, because Angron does think of The Emperor as an evil Highrider - :D Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/330372-30k-hollywood-movie-bad-producer-decisions-game-not-real/#findComment-4639059 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dagoth Ur Posted January 31, 2017 Share Posted January 31, 2017 I'm having a hard time finding something suitable, but Nicolas Cage has to be in here somewhere. Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/330372-30k-hollywood-movie-bad-producer-decisions-game-not-real/#findComment-4639136 Share on other sites More sharing options...
jacqualine47 Posted January 31, 2017 Author Share Posted January 31, 2017 I'm having a hard time finding something suitable, but Nicolas Cage has to be in here somewhere. Here is one from the heresy30k forum, by username ThePrince: My first thought would be Nick Cage as Horus. Totally inappropriate, but watching him descend into chaos induced madness would have me rolling. "Put...Angron...back...in..the box." Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/330372-30k-hollywood-movie-bad-producer-decisions-game-not-real/#findComment-4639256 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Charlo Posted January 31, 2017 Share Posted January 31, 2017 I think Vin Diesel would be an amazing Ferrus Manus. But we all know that Mr. Terry Crews should be Vulkan: "NOCTURNE VOLCANIC BODY ODOR BODY BLOCKER CAN BLOCK OUT THE SUUUUUUUUUUUUUUN!" Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/330372-30k-hollywood-movie-bad-producer-decisions-game-not-real/#findComment-4639293 Share on other sites More sharing options...
rendingon1+ Posted January 31, 2017 Share Posted January 31, 2017 Steven Segal as Nykona Sharrowkyn. Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/330372-30k-hollywood-movie-bad-producer-decisions-game-not-real/#findComment-4639328 Share on other sites More sharing options...
quinnwolf Posted January 31, 2017 Share Posted January 31, 2017 Jackie Chan as Khan (Hollywood loves misrepresentation of ethnicity), philosophising on war as follows: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wFZAGIz-YrU Dave Bautista as Drax (GOTG) as Angron. Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/330372-30k-hollywood-movie-bad-producer-decisions-game-not-real/#findComment-4639388 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Leif Bearclaw Posted January 31, 2017 Share Posted January 31, 2017 I'm having a hard time finding something suitable, but Nicolas Cage has to be in here somewhere. Nicholas Cage as EVERYONE. Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/330372-30k-hollywood-movie-bad-producer-decisions-game-not-real/#findComment-4639478 Share on other sites More sharing options...
depthcharge12 Posted January 31, 2017 Share Posted January 31, 2017 I think Vin Diesel would be an amazing Ferrus Manus. But we all know that Mr. Terry Crews should be Vulkan: "NOCTURNE VOLCANIC BODY ODOR BODY BLOCKER CAN BLOCK OUT THE SUUUUUUUUUUUUUUN!" Lol Terry Crews is a bro too sooo it might actually work too well... Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/330372-30k-hollywood-movie-bad-producer-decisions-game-not-real/#findComment-4639711 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Supe robot gangster #1 Posted February 1, 2017 Share Posted February 1, 2017 Bruce willis (die hard era) as Saul Tarvits "You wanna stay alive? Then stay with me" Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/330372-30k-hollywood-movie-bad-producer-decisions-game-not-real/#findComment-4639902 Share on other sites More sharing options...
bluntblade Posted February 2, 2017 Share Posted February 2, 2017 Tom Hardy's Bane as Mortarion."No one cared who I was before I put on the gas mask"Channing Tatum as Loken. No line comes to mind but it's still hilarious in my head Tatum can be very good (have yet to see Foxcatcher, buy that's a serious dramatic role in which he apparently excels). Orlando Bloom as Loken, Vin Diesel as Horus, that guy from The Hangover films as Yesugei. Hayden Christensen as Lucius... wait a moment. As for racially sketchy casting... I still want Iko Uwais to play Shiban and Donnie Yen for Qin Xa. No one's mentioned directors. So, George Lucas for The First Heretic, McG for Betrayer and Michael Bay for Scar Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/330372-30k-hollywood-movie-bad-producer-decisions-game-not-real/#findComment-4641009 Share on other sites More sharing options...
JeffJedi Posted February 2, 2017 Share Posted February 2, 2017 ''An Empire crumbles, a galaxy burns... but their love burns brighter...'' Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/330372-30k-hollywood-movie-bad-producer-decisions-game-not-real/#findComment-4641265 Share on other sites More sharing options...
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