Homebrewed Characters; Would you play against them as fair?

[SwordBrother13]

I've shown these characters on a couple of FB pages, but I didn't get quite the degree of feedback I was hoping for. I'm here seeking approval and/or constructive criticism on how to make the characters balanced, so the question is whether you would be comfortable playing against them in a friendly game and if not, what could be done to make you feel more comfortable with them? I wanted to put up screenshots of the 8e/9e unit template, but since I don't see how to do so, I'll just refer you to a their corresponding basic datasheet and just tell you the exceptions.

The first is a Black Templar Marshal who had artificer armor and had it reforged into artificer Mk X upon becoming Primaris, has a sword forged for him by a Salamanders Captain that has been used almost exclusively in fighting the Great Enemy since, a special adamantine mantle, and a hard-on for trying to be like Sigismund.
He has a plasma pistol(standard can-totally-suicide-with type), a +1 Strength, AP -4, 2 dmg power sword with the ability (paraphrasing)to add 1 to the wound roll against any CHAOS unit. Then he has his "Scarlet Mantle" which I've written down as granting him a 3++ in melee, and finally his unique rule "Echo of Sigismund" which adds 1 to his melee dmg when within Engagement Range of enemy CHARACTERS. For a complete view, the Warlord Trait he will be recieving is one where, CORE units within 6" improve their melee AP by 1 on unmodified wound rolls of 6. Priced at 6 Power and 125 Points.

The second character is a Night Lord sorcerer with a bit of a grand backstory as he was a character I played in a campaign of FFG's Deathwatch. Through nefarious means, he acquired for himself a highly sophisticated suit of armor that I would refer to as master-crafted as opposed to artificer, as well as the means to forge force-empowered lightning claws. He has a "guardian pistol" that is an award for great service within the Deathwatch. He also has a stolen Rosarius of a Chaplain that he has embedded an Eldar spirit stone within and linked to a psychic hood. With many years, foul sorcery, and a   mindset, this sorcerous contraption is his attempt at seeking immortality. His power as a Telepath rivals Ahriman's, but only in the field of telepathy. Although Ahriman has greater control and mastery of his power and that translates to all disciplines of psychic might, this character, though still a master in his own right, has a kind of power that seeps from him constantly. Clouding the minds of others, upsetting dispositions, and laying a breeding ground for mistakes in those who feel no fear, and causing downright terror in those that do, the sorcerer's very presence is a dread pall draped over the entire theater of war/slaughter. Other Psykers experience this as a...disorientation in the warp, which becomes pronounced when the sorcerer focuses on them and weaponizes it against them.
So, looking at a basic Chaos Sorcerer, we give him 1 more wound and a 2+ to hit for both melee and ranged just like all named Chief Librarians, aside from Mephiston of course. We throw a jump pack on him and then his weapons...he has both kinds of standard grenades, his special bolt pistol with-1 AP and 2 dmg, and his claws which are just 2 lightning claws with D3 dmg like most force weapons. Then the big stuff. Cast 2 deny 2 like a Chief Librarian, which I fancy him as for the Legion, and 4 special rules, with 1 being his armament and the other 3 all from psychic power. "The Sinplate" grants a 5++ and a +1 DtW. "Telepathic Terror" causes 2 models to flee instead of 1 when any enemy units within 6" fail a Morale test, before Combat Attrition. "Miasmic Presence" causes the opponent to lose 1 Command Point if this character is the WARLORD of a Battle-forged army. And "Master of Mind" permits him to choose an enemy PSYKER within 12" on his psychic phase and they suffer a -1 to their psychic tests until his next Psychic phase. The Warlord Trait he'll recieve even goes into reflecting his supersuit with it permitting him to Fall Back and still Charge AND imposes a -1 to hit in melee. He's priced at 10 Power and 190 Points.

I very much appreciate your time. Especially if you read the whole thing. Again, I would emphasize my request for constructive criticism, but I understand how patience might wear thin while reading what amounts to an attempt to make a fanfiction into legal gameplay, and you have my word that I'll give you the benefit of the doubt if you exhibit an online slip-of-the-tongue. Thank you.

Edited November 19, 2020 by TrawlingCleaner

[TrawlingCleaner]

Just before I start, please make sure to not use profanity/swearing as per the rules of the forum found here.

I've edited your post to reflect this.

 

I love homebrew characters and I love the effort and attention people put into them. I run a group of mates that play and most have at least one homebrew character. Something that I find is that players that have a character that they love, they tend to stack so many rules on to try to represent all of the parts of their personality/exploits. I think this is the case for both your characters, less so on the BT character. While you would see it as the best explanation of your character, others can see it as almost playground esque "my guy is better than yours because he can do this and this and this". I'm not decrying your homebrew at all, as someone who also has a lot of passion for creating my own characters, you really have to toe the line. Something I always suggest is: look at current special characters, compare them to their non-named counterparts rules and points wise. They're a really good outline to create your own.

 

Black Templar Marshall:

The sword stats is fine as is, even before the Assault doctrine hits, that's a very scary sword! I'll get onto the extra rule here in a moment

3++ whether in melee or not is very few and far between these days, with the only non-relic holding Space marine getting a 3++ is the Ultramarine Vitrix guard. I would suggest you make the Mantle a 4++ and a 2+ armour save which is essentially a stormshield. Not overly strong but still unique.

You have too many rules here stacked on top of each other IMO. +1 to wound vs Chaos is very cool, but also having +1dmg to Characters and still a Warlord trait on top is too much.

My suggestion is to either remove +1 to wound or +1dmg and keep the warlord trait. I would at that point drop him down to 120 points. When looking at an exsisting special character like Captain Sicarius who is 115 points, he has 1 less wound, 1 less attack, a special sword with a special rule attached, a warlord trait and a special rule that lets him make units ObSec. Definitely puts your guy on par with him. If you want to keep these rules, he needs to be at least 160+ IMO

 

Night Lords Sorcerer:

As I said before, you can tell when someone cares a lot for a character and I think I'd be right in assuming this is yours?

+1 W, 2+ BS is fine and makes sense. The Cast 2 and Deny 2 makes sense too, he's essentially a Chief Librarian as you say. This is homebrew but a Chaos lord cannot take a pair of lightning claws and a bolt pistol. The weapons are a big problem for me personally, as on top of the other rules (we'll get to them in a moment) they're too good. He doesn't need a special issue bolt pistol (I would argue he can't take one, he'd cut the thing in half trying to grab it with his claws!). The Claws give you 6 attacks on the charge, -3ap and D3 dmg each, far too good for being a psyker on top of that. My suggestion is that they keep the normal stats but on Unmodified 6s to wound they do an extra dmg.

The Sinplate is great and should be kept, so does Telepathic Terror but IMO it should not stack with the -1ld Nightlords get. My suggestion then is to cut the rest, these are far too good on top of everything else he gets. The Warlord trait he gets should be the ability to Fall back and Charge OR -1 to hit in melee, definitely not both.

If he was changed to the stuff I suggested I would price him at 160+ if not he would need to be at least 300 as he's obnoxiously good with the amount of rules stacked on.

 

This is all my personal opinion of course, but this is with a lot of homebrew characters tweaking