Works in Progress - Prompts and Rewrites (Advise wanted)

[TechCaptain]

So Vileblades Story is a rewrite since working with some authors I found that it lacks some story elements. Adahm's Story is a new attempt at story writing for my Inquisitor. Him and several others have gone under some recent name changes and other things to try to make them fit better.

Writing Prompts 
 
Vileblade’s Story
 
Betrayed by her Drukhari kin, the vicious gladiator Malaskia barely escapes just to become enslaved by the perfidious Inquisitor who makes use of her dark talents.
 
"Are your mon'keigh in position?" she asked, the Low Gothic words rolling off her tongue sinuously. The syllables seemed to slither into the high rafters of the empty warehouse, disappearing between the rusting shadows.
"Aye, milady. I have sentries by the riverside," Fraenck nodded towards the tall baydoors covering the building's Eastern front. "The rest are spread in the alleys. Or were, the last time I checked."

• Vileblade and Fraenck start in the middle of a Raid
• Vileblade is betrayed by fellow Dark Eldar
• Fraenck helps Vileblade survive Ambush
• Both escape the Raid (Dark Eldar and Imperial Forces enemies)
• Both flee into Pirate territory
• Fraenck betrays Vileblade by giving her up to his old employer Adahm
• Adahm ‘recruits’ Vileblade

Adahm’s Story

Driven down the path of Radicalization, the calculating Inquisitor Adahm remembers the path he paved with good intentions
 
"Each increasingly complicated plan took Inquisitor Adahm further from his own ideals, yet closer to his goals."

• On the way to or from acquiring some piece of tech from a Xenarite Heretek that went really rogue (likely a conflict ensues or had ensued.)
• Talking to the Mercenary, Adahm remembers the trauma of the battlefield and the pressure to make things work no matter what the right answer really is
• Talking to the Astartes, Adahm remembers his oaths, duty, why he is out there protecting the imperium
• The Skitarii reminds Adahm of his liaison days and getting deeper into technology
• The Tau, Adahm sees the wonders of advancement beyond even his Mechanicus contacts
• The Dark Eldar, eternal pain and strangenesses beyond any ability to grasp and a driving force to get humanity to a higher understanding motivates Adahm

Going from the Conversation with Alaox (and somehow tying a memory of time with the Mechanicus. I don't have a good idea of flow yet.) Alaox will bring up the Tau by asking if she is coming on this one. Adahm will talk to Fio'Vre over a Communication Box. (This should lead to his obsession with Technology.... I also need to figure out how to tone a naïve tone from her side.) This is prep for a excursion into a Heretek stronghold weakened by his mercenaries to acquire Tau/human hybrid tech... of some sort. The conversation should lead to a question of the health of Fraenck who I will have coordinating the Mercenaries.. Maybe as part of the Vanguard. Somehow it reminds Adahm of their similar experiences (enhancements? fighting wars? Intelligence work?) Vileblade would then need to be talked to (Either bringing her because of Fraenck or letting her know her toy is coming back.) Bring up relevance of whatever injury from the Dark Eldar Weapon that gives him pain and their strained relationship. Ending with a conversation with Erxandros as they finish preparing to drop into whatever situation as his backup plan...

Story start

Inquisitor Adahm stands on the bridge as the cruiser, Gears of Retribution, comes out of warp, bleeding the reality bending exhaust. The Cog-Kin animate lively over the view screens as the ship appears over this Fringe World of the Ishtar Wilds. His eyes scanned them and the readouts without expression as Alaox walked up behind him, "The Kill-Clades of the Unfettered Cohort are ready for initial drop. Your Talons have already sunk deep making sure your prey will not escape. Are we deploying Fio?" Adahm looked at the screens once more and then picked up a nearby communication box that was his direct line to the section of the ship even those of the clan needed permission to access.

"Fio'Vre, We have arrived, are you ready?"

Edited December 24, 2021 by TechCaptain