The SKULLCRUSHER Posted June 20, 2005 Share Posted June 20, 2005 Here is some newly added origin fluff for my DIY chapter. Imperial Warhawks Gene-Seed: The Imperial Warhawks Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/77675-diy-chapter-imperial-warhawks/ Share on other sites More sharing options...
The SKULLCRUSHER Posted June 20, 2005 Author Share Posted June 20, 2005 Comments about the origin are welcome! Anyone know of a good Ork name generator? Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/77675-diy-chapter-imperial-warhawks/#findComment-894017 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ferrata Posted June 21, 2005 Share Posted June 21, 2005 Its nicely written, but I think the whole founding is flawed. There is no reason why the IF would go back to Terra, its not really their homeworld anymore. It is unknown totally how chapters are founded, but I dont think the IF history adds to your chapter, this easily could be moved as the first chapter master. In his actions, he lay down the tactic of the chapter. Ferrata Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/77675-diy-chapter-imperial-warhawks/#findComment-894863 Share on other sites More sharing options...
The SKULLCRUSHER Posted June 21, 2005 Author Share Posted June 21, 2005 So what do you suggest about how they were created? Or should I just skip that part & change it to the chapter has already been created and write about Gideon Hawk (he would be the first chapter master) I didn't want to dive into it too deep, but wanted alittle for a being that could leave something to the imagination. Thanks for the comments! Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/77675-diy-chapter-imperial-warhawks/#findComment-894897 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ferrata Posted June 22, 2005 Share Posted June 22, 2005 Having Hawk as the first chapter master would work, he does get to chose the name. The chapter could be founded during one of the foundings and posted to [insert place] because Imperial Defences were low/Attackers were increasing Ferrata Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/77675-diy-chapter-imperial-warhawks/#findComment-895488 Share on other sites More sharing options...
The SKULLCRUSHER Posted June 22, 2005 Author Share Posted June 22, 2005 So do you think that I should leave out all mention of the Imperial Fists? And if I do, how should I word the origin, leaving out the Imperial Fists background? I wanted them to have been at full strength & operating as a chapter for some period of time well before the 2nd & 3rd Armageddon War, so i'm not sure what timeframe that would be for a founding number. I f anyone has any ideas, please shoot them my way! Any other comments are welcome good or bad, first time doing any kind of creative writing! Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/77675-diy-chapter-imperial-warhawks/#findComment-896073 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ferrata Posted June 22, 2005 Share Posted June 22, 2005 Well, just say they are IF genestock, which has led to them having some of the same traits as IF, stubborn, prideful. Say they were formed to help the imperial defenders from the increasing Ork activity (thus, they are formed to fight orks) There first action was [insert your story].....Since then they have had a colourful history fighting the orks Ferrata Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/77675-diy-chapter-imperial-warhawks/#findComment-896085 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sons of Russ Posted August 2, 2005 Share Posted August 2, 2005 I like it all, the paint scheme and the history. I was thinking of doing precisely what you have done, and Imperial Fist Successor with similiar colours, but their own traits. I may still do it using the Pre-Heresy Imperial Fists as a basis for a traited marine army. I think IF look best with black, not red. I really dig your IA colour scheme for them. A really good mix of black and yellow. Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/77675-diy-chapter-imperial-warhawks/#findComment-937438 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ivoracle Posted August 3, 2005 Share Posted August 3, 2005 A subtle twist on the backstory could be: Some time after Hawk's heroic actions, the High Lords of Terra announced a new Space Marine founding (exact founding TBD - the sticky threads at the top have some information on foundings). At least one of the new chapters used IF geneseed, and the IF were asked to provide some officers to help train and establish the new chapter. Given his heroic past, Hawk and some of his subordinates in the 5th Company were natural choices. After the chapter became established, Hawk and his men had the option to return to the IF or remain with the new chapter, and Hawk chose to remain. Thus the Warhawks were born. This fits a bit more with some of the Chapter formation ideas that folks have come up with by reading between the lines of the GW fluff. Don't know if it's "better", per se, but it's something. Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/77675-diy-chapter-imperial-warhawks/#findComment-937506 Share on other sites More sharing options...
The SKULLCRUSHER Posted August 3, 2005 Author Share Posted August 3, 2005 Thanks for the updates and ideas! They are always welcome! I need to work on the origin alittle more and I like your idea Ivoracle. I've been toying around a new logo for the Imperial Warhawks that is based alittle on the Raptors logo. Color scheme has also undergone some changes, mostly with the helmet (wether I should keep the stripe or not) I still plan on keeping the yellow legs (kinda my aknowledgement for the Imperial Fists) Hopefully sooner or later this week I can post some updates on fluff & color scheme. Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/77675-diy-chapter-imperial-warhawks/#findComment-938632 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Commissar Molotov Posted August 4, 2005 Share Posted August 4, 2005 Actually, Ferrata, from what I can discern, Terra is still nominally the homeworld of the Imperial Fists. (Lysander was recruited from Terra). Whilst the Imperial Fists recruit from many worlds, including Necromunda, and are sequestered aboard the Phalanx, Terra is still officially their homeworld. ----------- Your chapter looks pretty good so far. That said, you might want to make your origins section more concise. I might reconsider naming your leader Grimfang 'Shiznit', though. :) Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/77675-diy-chapter-imperial-warhawks/#findComment-939000 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ferrata Posted August 4, 2005 Share Posted August 4, 2005 Actually, Ferrata, from what I can discern, Terra is still nominally the homeworld of the Imperial Fists. (Lysander was recruited from Terra). Whilst the Imperial Fists recruit from many worlds, including Necromunda, and are sequestered aboard the Phalanx, Terra is still officially their homeworld. You learn something everyday :) I thought that the Fists just said that Terra was their homeworld because it was and now for Pride reasons. Didnt think that they actually ever really went back there but busy on crusades etc. Ferrata Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/77675-diy-chapter-imperial-warhawks/#findComment-939049 Share on other sites More sharing options...
The SKULLCRUSHER Posted August 4, 2005 Author Share Posted August 4, 2005 Commissar Molotov, how should I make it more concise? What parts of the origin fluff should or do I need to work on? Any feedback would be great! Below I've attached the lastest logo I designed for the Warhawks & also have updated some color schemes for normal marines, Sgt, & Vet. Sgt.. These color schemes are not set in stone yet, so any ideas or improvements can be under consideration. Thanks again for your time everyone! +++Mod Edit: Link because it was far too wide and was messing with thr thread formatting... Aurelius. +++ Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/77675-diy-chapter-imperial-warhawks/#findComment-939810 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Commissar Molotov Posted August 4, 2005 Share Posted August 4, 2005 For a start, you'll have to edit that picture or change it to a link, as it's well over the 700px width limit on the B+C. With regards to the fluff: Firstly, it's a bit of a misnomer to refer to Gideon Hawk as the chapter's 'founder'. Only the High Lords of Terra can found a chapter. He ought to be referred to as their first chapter master. You repeat yourself later when saying "Gideon Hawk, Master of the 5th Company". Plus he ought to be referred to a Captain. To be fair, your origins section isn't that verbose. It might benefit from paragraphing, however. Just to break it up slightly. Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/77675-diy-chapter-imperial-warhawks/#findComment-939813 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ferrata Posted August 4, 2005 Share Posted August 4, 2005 First that picture needs linking or resizing. The Commissar beat me to it :P On the picture, that is awesome :lol: Where did you get that from? I really like the way you show rank Ferrata Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/77675-diy-chapter-imperial-warhawks/#findComment-939817 Share on other sites More sharing options...
The SKULLCRUSHER Posted August 4, 2005 Author Share Posted August 4, 2005 DAMN!!!! I didn't check the file size! SORRY!!!!! I will go back and resize the file and post it again. Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/77675-diy-chapter-imperial-warhawks/#findComment-939821 Share on other sites More sharing options...
The SKULLCRUSHER Posted August 4, 2005 Author Share Posted August 4, 2005 Ok, lets try this.....still probably to big...... link pic is too big ++EDIT++ next time it'll be deleted. nice image though.. Neph Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/77675-diy-chapter-imperial-warhawks/#findComment-939827 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ferrata Posted August 4, 2005 Share Posted August 4, 2005 Still too big. Needs to be no bigger then 700 wide, currently its 900 Ferrata Correct Size (I Hope) http://i2.photobucket.com/albums/y4/Vulkans-Guard/ImperialWarhawksUpdate.jpg Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/77675-diy-chapter-imperial-warhawks/#findComment-939829 Share on other sites More sharing options...
The SKULLCRUSHER Posted August 4, 2005 Author Share Posted August 4, 2005 Ferrata, thanks for resizing it for me. the picture is out of the "How to paint Space Marines" book. I scanned in the artwork and colored it in Adobe Illustrator. I was trying to something alittle different with the way ranks are more commanly shown. The logo I'm definantly set on! So I will have to order the decals from Griffon Games. Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/77675-diy-chapter-imperial-warhawks/#findComment-939849 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ferrata Posted August 4, 2005 Share Posted August 4, 2005 You need to delete the older picture still That symbol is good, it has a nice balance of detail & simpleness. Only suggestion I can make is maybe have a golden eagle instead of yellow on the chest, might break it up a bit. Consider the rank system stolen :lol: Ferrata Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/77675-diy-chapter-imperial-warhawks/#findComment-939853 Share on other sites More sharing options...
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