Paradill Posted June 28, 2011 Share Posted June 28, 2011 So here is what would be the opening snippet of the novel I am currently toying with.. I know it's short but would any of you be interested reading more based on this? So this is where I die. The thought had no emotion to it, it was too late for emotion, this was an inevitability now. A fact. This is where I die. Lying in the churned dirt of some nameless, celestial orb. I die at the birth of an empire. I die at the end of brotherhood. He let out a single, wet, bloodied cough as he struggled to catch his breath, the mucus like blood dripping down his chin onto his sheared and battered armour. He noticed the air, cooling on his face, yet acrid with the stench of war, the blood and sweat of thousands, the heated, artificial smell of bolt shell propellant. The heavy, nauseating reek of fear. The sun hung low in the sky, the end of the day. The eleventh? The twelfth? All the fighting had become a blur, a single, unending nightmare. He had seen his brothers butchered before him, and he had avenged then with fist and fury. Yet the monsters he slew with righteous anger were not the debased xenoforms that had preyed on humanity since times long forgotten, they were not the immaterial beasts that howled praise to their dark masters as they tasted the blood of the innocent, these were the worst kind of monsters. These were once brothers. He heard the sound of them, the cold laughter as they slaughtered his men, the mechanical soulless precision of their chainswords and servo-arms as they tore through his squads in lethal close combats. There weren't enough of his men left now, no coherence, no plan. Just base, animal survival, individuals fighting fate and time with stubborn defiance. The traitors were winning. He heard the sound of heavily armoured boots crushing the rubble strewn ground as they stalked towards him. The wounds in his side and back sent pulsing shockwaves of agony through him as he tried to reach his bolter with his good hand, but it was useless. The sound of those boots, the heavy, controlled breathing. That was the sound of a predator about to finish its prey... Chapter One: Glorious Austerity Paradill Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dominicus Posted June 28, 2011 Share Posted June 28, 2011 Gave it a quick once-over, sounds really, good, am looking forward to seeing this develop more soon. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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