EVENT - The Schism of Mars

[Beren]

I think I should add the bits about Lukas Chrom from Forbidden Knowledge into the 1st section. Otherwise we've mentioned the Raijin Engine three times without explaining what it actually is.

[bluntblade]

I need to finish that

[Beren]

Taking place just before Blunt's excerpt.

 

The Breaking of the Gates

 

With the surrounding terrain firmly under his control, Warmaster Alexandros' gave tactical command to the Fire Keepers Primarch, Niklaas, whose expertise in siege warfare far outclassed his own. Alongside the Abyssii master of the Ordo Reductor, Charon Discut, he began to lay down plans that would see the Gates of Olympus Mons shattered. In total there were six of the great gates into Olympus Mons, alongside dozens of smaller passsageways. The largest of these was set into Olympus Mons' northern facing and it's fall would be not only the hardest to achieve, but the most symbolic. It's destruction would be an open display of how the treacherous could never escape the vengeance of the righteous. The Ordinatus Nox, an apocalyptic device capable of dueling with starships in orbit, would be given the duty of breaching the wall. Yet there was a danger. A fortress's entrance is always it's weakest point, as such it is always the most fortified. Olympus Mons was no exception. The Gate to Kelbor-Hal's domain was studded with weapons varying from heavy bolters to macro cannon emplacements and vortex missile silos. The Loyalists were loath to risk their most powerful weapon against such concentrated fire. So a solution was devised.

 

While Niklaas masterminded the full assault the Abyssii often claim and with reasonable cause that the breaking of the gates was their triumph. Not only would it be their weapon that shattered the gates, it would be their machinations that compromised their defenses. Not content to use the research gleaned from the Ater stations for defensive purposes alone, Mortera had ordered a limited Djinn-virus weapon be placed at her disposal in preparation for circumstances that might necessitate its use. Such circumstances had arisen. It would have to be activated within almost immediate proximity if the defenses data network, but once activated the weapons surrounding the target would be rendered impotent. Mortera presented this device to Niklaas as plunder looted from Traitor facilities later razed to the ground. No sooner had Niklaas been informed of this than a strike force of Thallax and Iron Bears Astartes under Captain Ameyalli Tosahwi was assembled with due haste. Utilising a portion of the transportation network that had once brought supplies and personnel from across the domains of the Red Planet to within the walls of Olympus Mons they would fight their way to an optimal location within range of the targeted machinery: once there it would be activated. Chances of success were deemed relatively high. Chances of survival were not.

 

Four hours elapsed between the strike team's departure and Tosahwi's report that the objective had been obtained. In the same vox message he described the horrendous casualties inflicted upon his force. Archmagos Mortera, who had refused to surrender the Ordinatuss Nox to anyone else's command, did not wait for the loss of contact, the confirmation of the teams destruction. She could see guns hanging limp in their emplacements, turrets making some mad spinning dance. The defenses were down and logic demanded that he take advantage of it. Those Titans still remaining under the Fabricator-General's banner sprinted forth in a vain attempt to impede the Ordinatus Nox's progress and were felled by the blistering fire of pre-positioned artillery bombardments previously planned by the Primarch. The Burning Stars Warlord Ictum Interficiens ignored any other target in favour of closing the distance between itself and the Abyssii war engine. It was too late. With the sound of the sky being rent in twain a searing beam of coherent energy flashed forth, through the Ictum Interficiens former location, and lanced into the gate structure itself. An edifice built to resist armies was reduced to a funeral pyre for the corpses that lay within. Within moments the growl of combat machines and the tramp of steel shod limbs rose to a crescendo. With Niklaas at their head the armies of the Warmaster marched onwards.

[bluntblade]

I really can't buy into the notion of a single gate for a city that's biggest than some countries. Just imagine fortifying London or NYC and leaving only one massive entrance and exit.

 

I suggest we have five or six major gates, with one grander than the others and various smaller ones that Kelbor Half orders sealed (not in time to stop some infiltration forces getting in though). Niklaas takes the biggest, the Abyssii siege master another, Alex perhaps another and the rest are seized by combined Loyalist forces.

 

The idea for the bombers was also that they'd target these guns, so perhaps this should go after the aerial attack, with emphasis on its much greater scale.

[Talonair]

I'd imagine the main gates would have formidable air defense as well, so perhaps the djinn-virus attack happens as a result of the air coverage

[Beren]

So what parts are we keeping exactly?

 

Talon: Do you mean the air coverage enables the virus attack or the virus attack takes place in order to enable air coverage?

[Talonair]

I meant that the air defenses make attacking the gate defenses by air impossible, so they use the virus attack instead

[bluntblade]

I don't think it should be impossible. They should take a horrible toll, but be breakable for combined bomber and artillery attacks.

 

I just think it's more realistic if we limit the number of things that need one particular weapon to destroy. Niklaas can demonstrate his mastery by using a variety of resources.

 

Also seems to me that scrapcode is just too inherently nasty and chaotic for anyone to harness it without being corrupted. Maybe there should be a mention of some Abyssii personnel trying to use it, but going insane from the taint and having to be put down.

[Beren]

The Abyssii have had hundreds of years to refine it, so it's probably not as powerful as standard scrapcode anyway. Its unlikely to have chaos influence at all. Besides, the entire structure gets reduced to less than ash immediately afterwards.

[bluntblade]

Oh, data-djinn would be OK. I'd still have aircraft and Titans doing damage, but sure, that should be employed.

[Beren]

So basically the changes are:

5 to 6 more medium sized gates taken out by Niklaas, Alexandros and other detachments.

Greater emphasis on air support.

[bluntblade]

For a given value of medium. Niklaas commands the breaking of the biggest.

[Beren]

Is Mortera with him? Because I doubt the Abyssii will place their most valuable Ordinatus under his sole supervision without one of their own being there. I imagine the symbolic significance alone would be cause for her presence.

[bluntblade]

Yeah, I'd have her present.

[Talonair]

Mortera would certainly be present for the deployment of the Ordinatus unit. And yea the data-djinn attack wouldn't be scrapcode, even the Abyssii aren't crazy enough to attempt to harness chaos-infected code

[Beren]

Edited. Is this any better?

Also, me and Blunt's pieces combined totals to 1685 words. I know we decided to go over the set word limit, but this section is heavily unbalanced with all the ones that did follow said word limit.

[bluntblade]

I planned to add rather more anyway, and Olympus Mons and the Mariner Plain strike me as the main events. Speaking of Olympus Mons, got a little more down:

 

As Niklaas ordered the Ordinatus Nox into position, offensives began against the other five main gates. Ordinati and Titans were brought forward to batter the defences into submission, bombers and gunships swooping overhead to add their weapons to the firestorm and wipe out any remaining emplacements which might threaten their allies. Shields burst, ferrocrete crumbled and metal ran molten under the bombardments. One by one, the gates fell, and the Loyalists brought judgement to Olympus Mons.

 

Chief Eshad of Tribe Grannus was the first to break through after Niklaas, his Mastodon entering the city behind the Titans of Tonarum. Abyssi’s siegemaster Charon Discut began his escalade shortly afterwards, and before long the rest were advancing too. At the Galvanius Gate, the Legio Tempestus cast down the great lightning-marked door, and Irvin Ruel’s tank companies thundered over the threshold. Gliding in above them came Stormbirds, and no ordinary Stormbirds at that. These were Maahres-pattern gunships, adapted from the vast Apophis template and fitted with even more punishing weaponry. The Abyssii had designed them for the master of the Vth Legion, and sure enough it was Alexandros and his chosen companies who rode them into battle.

 

Taghmata stood ready to halt them, among them the surviving Traitor Titans and Knights, so vast were the concourses within the city. Yet the Loyalists’ strength was the greater, and their fire raked across the inner defences. Skitarii and other machine soldiers simply ceased to exist, their remains lost in the dust of ferrocrete and stone. But on came strange war machines, many of which bore no resemblance to any yet encountered, and here the Loyalist Knights and Titans found a sterner test. At Galvanius a swarm of insectile machines, moving at implausible speed and bearing energy weapons of fiendish power, cut off several companies of Halcyon Wardens. Laying waste several tank squadrons, they would have massacred the Astartes, had the Knights of Zivich not intervened and destroyed them in a hard-fought melee.

[simison]

Edited. Is this any better?

Also, me and Blunt's pieces combined totals to 1685 words. I know we decided to go over the set word limit, but this section is heavily unbalanced with all the ones that did follow said word limit.

 

Can the other sections be buffed up to 1500~ words?

[bluntblade]

As in more added?

[Beren]

Self-correction: Everything except section 2 is being buffed anyway by Blunt's work. I'm not sure how to expand section 2.

[bluntblade]

That being Ruel's initial intervention?

[Beren]

No, breaching of the Tempest Line to the Abyssii securing their portion of the Ring of Iron.

[bluntblade]

Ah

[Beren]

Blunt:You got any more writing coming for Olympus Mons?

[simison]

No, breaching of the Tempest Line to the Abyssii securing their portion of the Ring of Iron.

 

Ah, so the opening moments of the war. Should be easy enough to add 500 words in there, elaborate more on the Traitor's opening manuevers and siege forces. Alternatively, we can add more about the Abyssii's efforts to defend themselves, though I favor the former.