Lord of the Rings Parody

[venyak]

Hello all,

I have had this project in mind for some time and I am coming here with my notes in search for some feedback and ideas. The title of the topic is very self-explaining, but yes, thats the thing, I want to write a story ressembling LoTR but in a much grimmer and 40k style.

 

Scene I:

Onoricus, radical inquisitor of Ordo Malleus (maybe Xenos Hybris or similar faction), with big psiquic powers, travels in his ship with his entourage. He take a look on each of the members of its group:

- Bomus: I am yet not sure if it should be a crusader, or a grey knight...

- Stryder: His most promising interrogator, or at least, the one that has survived

- Gymkin: An squat (or how he want to be denominated, kin) Brokhyr hired as the engineer. Kin engineers are very useful and they can always be hired with the right amount of money.

- Aeldrolas: An aeldari wanderer that came to his group arguing that he has had a vision accoding to wich, "this is the place where he should be".

The rest of the entourage was comprised of some servitors that carry out most of the ordinary works of the ship.

Scene II:

Onoricus is put under a track. He must travel to Hobton. One of the only industrial-age ratling planets in the subsector, since it seems that stange reports of demons are arriving from there. He hate ratlings, they are disgusting, promiscous and dirty. A bunch of stimulant-adicts that only live to eat and fornicate.

Scene III:

After months of following the track, he found a group of ratlings that have a courious artifact (not sure yet of what kind of artifact) which is the source of all the daemonic episodes in the planet. Instantly, he felt atracted to it, seduced by it.... However, he is able to overcome the chaos tempation. Undoubtedly, it is a possed artifact. When he try to substract it from the leader of the ratling gang, socalled Bilbing, he start aging very fast untill he pass away. Instantly, a second ratling, named Frorling, gets the artifact. Onoricus decides is better this way. A ratling will carry the artifact so that he is not harmed in the process. However, ratlings are weak but numerous and expensable, so he pick another 3 of them (Sarmging, Priping and Mirring) and command the servitors to kill the rest of the gang. The chosen 3 will share the same luck once the mission is finished. There must be to chaos witness within the imperium and anyway, the have already been corrupted by chaos.

Scene IV:  

Aeldrolas tell Onoricus that the only one that can give some answers about the artifact that they cannot destroy is a powerful aeldari wicht called Eldrad Ulthran, from Ulthuwe Craftworld. So they start searching for the craftworld.

Scene V:

The finally found Eldrad who has already forseen the encounter. He told Onoricus the true nature of the artifact, it was crafted in the decadent times of the aeldari empire and was the corrupted by chaos. Also, he told Onoricus that it can only be destroyed is in where it was crafted, a word called Ash Angaur which was devoured by the eye of terror and that it must be destroyed since the same Abbadon is looking for it and it will provide him with humongous power. (I am not sure here why or how the object might be so important for Abbadon)

Scene VI:

However, Curumus, another radical inquisitor from Ordo Maleus. The one that has previously given the track about the artifact, find them. After a short talk in which Onoricus tell him about the artifact and the information Eldrad told him, Onoricus ship is attacked by Curumus ship unvealing himself as a corrupted inquisitor that has gone too far in its radical beliefs of using chaos against chaos. However, they manage to survive and run away but with it ship severly damaged they must find a place to stock up and repair it. Gymkin suggest that there is a votann league fortress neaby in the subsector called Dawi-Tiwaz.

Scene VII:

However, when they arrive there the fortress is totally in silence. There are no kin, nor corpses. However, there are traces of battle. Gymkin suddenly start crying when he realized that the heart of the vortress, the votann, has been severly damaged. They are able to found an Ironkin that with it last energy told them that they are in great danger, the threat come from the inside, and when they realize it, the xenos were already infesting the fortress and attacking both from the skys and from the inside. Is it as this point where a bunch of kin genestealers attack the group. They managed to survived and start running to the ship. However, a great daemon of Khorne appears and destroy the ship. He has been summoned by Abbadon to destroy them and bring back the artifact.

Scene VIII:

Oronicus fight the great demon over a bridge inside the fortress that separe the group from the hangar with the help of his psiquic powers but after a big fight the daemon is expelled to the inmaterium. However, Oronicus has exhausted all his forces and appears to fall from the bridge.

Scene IX: 

The rest of the group run away leadered by Stryder followed by the xenos that infest the planet knowing there is no possible scape from them now that their ship has been destroyed. However, they are rescued by a Warp Spiders squad leadered by aeldari wicht Galdal'lil sent by Eldrad, who has foreseen the fight result, and they are evacuated by the webway gate in the planet. Galdal'lil tell the stupid blind mon-keighs the future she has foreseen if they failed their mission.

Scene X:

The group is left in an imperial world where the group, now leadered by Stryder, commande a new ship to continue their mission without Onoricus. However, Stryder is being constatly cuestioned by Bomus who does not consider him a true inquisitor and that things the Aeldari cannot be trusted and the artifact must be carried to Terra. Knowing the risk of bringing the artifact to terra Stryder refuses.

Scene XI: When arriving the edge of former eye of terror (now part of the maledictum cicatrix) the group is emboushed by a chaos squad. But not any common chaos worshipers. A squad of chaos astartes of the black legion sent by Abbadon himself after receiving and information from Curumus about their location. Bomus, considered themselves trapped tryes to destroy the artifact attacking the ratlings in its way. Afraid, the ratling run away splitting into two groups and using a couple of exploring little ships while the chaos marines are boarding the ship. After this, the rest of the members fight the chaos marines eventually destroying the squad. However, Bomus is killed in the fight after an heroic battle.

Scene XII: Curumus has been wathing the scene and he is able to capture one of the ratling ships in their run away. However, unluckly the capture the ones that don't have the artifact and so, start torturing them in orther to receive information about where are the other ones going (information they don't have).

Scene XIII: Stryder decides to recover the ratlings and the artifact and fulfill the mission Oronicus has started.....

 

As you see there are lot of things that I do not have clear at all. For example, I am not sure if the story should be set before or after the fall of Cadia. 

Please forgive my English. In fact, my low level is one of the facts why I haven't written this story properly yet.

 

 

 

 

 

[Graceless]

Hi there, this is an interesting idea and some of the concept works surprisingly well. One thing: I think Bomus should be a crusader not a Grey Knight. I think a Grey Knight would be too awe inspiring to be over-ruled by an acolyte (Stryder)

[venyak]

Thank you very much for the feedback! I will take it into account.

[venyak]

 

Onoricus was a radical Inquisitor of the Ordo Malleus, a feared and respected member of the radical Xenos Hybris faction. An tireless fighter in the battle against Chaos and aliens, always willing to do whatever was necessary to protect humanity and the empires from the constant threat that loomed over them. Although his methodology was sometimes questionable (as he used any type of xeno artifact, particularly those created by the Aeldari, if it helped him destroy Chaos). His psychic power was legendary and had been feared by many over the years. With his white beard and advanced age, Onoricus was an imposing and respected figure in the Warhammer 40000 universe. It was the year 431 of the 41st millennium, when he was on his ship leaving Tirintia, a doomed planet to which he had been forced to order exterminatus, as it had suffered a demonic infestation. There could be no witnesses. That's when he received the message. Attacks had been reported on a demonic world in the subsector. He was ordered to evaluate the threat, resolve it if possible, or mark it for exterminatus

 

- Server, talk to me about the world Hobton. - Onoricus roared

- Hobton, a post-industrial hive world of small size. It is inhabited by 90% Ratlings - the server responded in a mechanical and religious voice.

 

Onoricus hated ratlings, seeing them as promiscuous, dirty and disgusting addicts to both stimulants and tranquilizers. They only lived to eat and fornicate. However, he knew he had a job to do and set aside his thoughts. He looked to his group.

 

Stryder was his oldest acolyte, at least if only the living were counted. His most efficient interrogator and surely the one who would inherit his position as inquisitor. A young and ambitious individual seeking to prove his worth and rise in the hierarchy. Expert in information gathering and searching for clues and evidence, as well as being a good fighter. Unfortunately, no psychic power.

 

Bomus was a veteran officer of the astramilitarum, expert in military tactics, whom Onoricus had required about a year ago, when he accompanied the grey knights on their native world, Cadia, the last line of defense against chaos. His skills had proven very beneficial in his last missions and Onoricus had no intention of releasing him from service for now.

 

"Gymkin was a "squat" or, as he preferred to be called, a "kin". He was an engineer, or rather a "Brokhyr," that Onoricus had hired. Although he didn't like abhumans much, he had to admit that Gymkin was much better than any technosacerdote he had had under his command before.

 

Finally, with a cloak that made him almost indistinguishable from the environment, there was Aeldrolas, an Aeldari wanderer from the craftworld Sainn han, the most savage of them. A solitary enigmatic individual who had left behind his home and family to escape the strict life of the craftworld and had joined his retinue, assuring that it was where he must be. He was a master of stealth and infiltration and an experienced shooter, which were very useful skills for an inquisitor.

 

Navigator, set course for Hobton - he said dryly.

 

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

Months had passed in Hobton. But the circle was closing. Stryder had interrogated countless Ratlings and finally found the source of the attacks. It was an industrial ship on the outskirts of the planet's largest hive. Onoricus was already on his way. Onoricus entered the building. He had instructed Stryder to stay in position. Inside, a group of Ratlings led by an old man they called Bilbing were performing some kind of ritual. He couldn't help but notice that he had a curious artifact, a ring of some kind. The inquisitor was immediately drawn to the artifact, seduced by its chaotic power. However, he knew he couldn't be tempted by chaos. He didn't know what it was, but he knew he had to destroy the artifact, no matter the cost. Using his psychic power, he paralyzed all the Ratlings in the room, injecting them with pure terror. He then approached to take the artifact from Bilbing, but as the Ratling leader began to age rapidly, he died. A second Ratling, Frorling, took advantage of the distraction.

 

- Stryder, they're heading towards you, capture them alive. Bomus, take care of the rest. - He ordered as he left the building.

 

Onoricus realized that it was probably better for a Ratling to be carrying the artifact, as it would protect him from its corrupting influence. The explosion distracted him from his thoughts. Bomus was good at explosions. One less problem. He headed to Stryder's position to congratulate himself on seeing his interrogator had already captured the fleeing abhumans. He selected three more Ratlings in addition to the one who has stolen the artifact, Sarmging, Priping and Mirring, and ordered Stryder to eliminate the rest of the gang. He knew that the selected Ratlings would also have to be eliminated once the mission was complete, there was no room for chaos corruption in the Imperium.

Edited December 30, 2022 by venyak