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Things that you shouldnt say to the inquisition


nexus night

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What are you a Pimp?

You are what? An Inquistor? Is that like a game show host?

We are the Borg, lower your shields and surrender your ships.

You are sunglasses away from almost being cool!

Would you tap that? *points at a Nurgle Plaguebearer.*

I shall drink blood from your skull!

I was kidding! No really!

Why are you in a nasty mood? A space Marine give you a wedge!

Look a Space Wolf, too bad you don't have the balls to stop him.

Can you pass the Corn Flakes, Ow! that Hurt, hey quit hitting me, what did I say!

I tap that sister of battle any time!

So I had this dream were I was having sex with three sisters of Battle an this purple tenticle thing.

"While on Taros I found me a new Pistol man the Tau make some good shooty things"

 

"Ive heard the warps nice this time of the year"

 

"So I suppose you guys run Mac?"

 

Inquisitor "Come with me" other "your sister said something similar last night *pelvic thrusts*"

Inquisitor "Come with me" other "your sister said something similar last night *pelvic thrusts*"

 

My sister is a whore and I will likely be charges to bring her in soon, you I deal with now! Inquister responce.

 

 

Can I have another Gov?

 

Beat me harder, I know you love it!

 

Is that a Shock Maul in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?

thats all i got guys i will think of some more really bad ones ;)

If you really have to could you at least type out your words? :tu:

Seconded.

 

Also, something I actually said to an Inquisitor in a Dark Heresy game: "We've all got bombs surgically implanted in us that you can remote detonate at any time? [sarcasm] It's so nice to know that you trust us, Inquisitor. [/sarcasm]" That's when I learned that Inquisitors don't appreciate sarcastic smartasses, as the Inquisitor promptly explained by shooting my character in the leg.

 

In a similar vein, one should never mock an Inquisitor by asking if their interrogation methods consist of poking you with soft cushions and/or forcing you to sit in a comfy chair. People who get the monty python reference will laugh, and then the Inquisitor will torture you to death in a particularly horrible and gruesome manner.

 

 

I get the reference!!!! I am a fan of Monty Python. *gruesome torture to death*

 

 

I have a couple:

 

'Look, mate calm down. He only said you smelled interesting... *sniff* Oh, wait, you do.'

'What's this oddly curvy weapon do?'

More to be added.

"Well Hello, Mr Fancy Pants! I got news for you buddy, you aint leadib' but two things right now. Jack and sh-t and jack left town!"

 

------

 

While evading the Inquisition claiming to be Innocent

 

"Infamy! Infamy! they've all got it in fa' me!"

"Well Hello, Mr Fancy Pants! I got news for you buddy, you aint leadib' but two things right now. Jack and sh-t and jack left town!"

 

------

 

While evading the Inquisition claiming to be Innocent

 

"Infamy! Infamy! they've all got it in fa' me!"

 

Ash would be an Awesome Inquistor

 

Ah for Khorne's Sakes

 

Those aren't Horrors you just got into my stash and you are stoned!

 

Twinkee?

 

You can't kill me I am Immoral!

 

Look officers I only had four beers I can drive!

 

I am sorry I liked it ok!

 

Nazirific!

 

You would do that Sister Superior and we both now it.

 

So this how you deal with your sexual frustration is it?

"I want diplomatic immunity"

 

(mole enters room carrying briefcase like pizza box)"large double anchovies?"

 

"What? no backup?"

 

"Knock knock""who's there""interrupting and completely uncalled for""interrupting an com..."*slaps inquisitor in face*

 

"give me all your money!"

 

(Bangs on spaceship's door)"HY Jack"

 

"Go ahead, make my day"

 

"I can kill you with my brain"

 

"You are all gonna die"

 

"is that all you got?"

 

(to radical =][=)"Have you looked in the mirror lately?"

 

"When was the last time you got a C.A.T. scan?"

 

"do you know how to use that gun or...what"

 

Inquisitor;"how far do really think you can run from use?" Heretic;"well i never accredited the inquisition with an overabundance of brains"

 

"if you wanted to show me reason you shouldn't have sent an assassin"

 

"EAT ME!"

 

"Your acolyte...well he told me to bite him, so I did"

 

"Pop quiz moron; guy has a nine mill autopistol to you hea...."

Did you see the idiot Inquisitor trying to get the hang of the Terminator Armor?

 

Blood for the Blood Emperor! Skulls for the Golden Throne!

 

"What are you doing with that daemonette?!?"

She looked like a Sororitas to me, honest!

  • 5 weeks later...
Worst thing i can think of is; walking up to SOB, nice butt baby...SLAP! (how quickly would you die if you did that?)

 

Unpedantic: Approximately 1.25 seconds, mabye more.

 

Pedantic: Depends on the sister of battle.

Here's some more:

 

(near self-destruct button) "I wonder what happens when I press this?"

 

"Don't wanna."

 

*makes gun sign at inquisitor's head* "BOOM! HEADSHOT!"

 

"Screw you guys, I'm going home."

 

Acolyte: "Does Chaos change your gender?"

Helena1: "Why do you ask?"

Acolyte: "I wanna be a woman."

Helena: "Why not get a surgical gender change?"

Acolyte: "Because chaos does it faster!"

 

*pokes Inquisitor* "Poke!"

 

"Last night, I had a freaky dream where i killed the Imperium, and now I can lift things with my mind. Is that bad?"

 

*points to Daemonette2*"Oh, I'd SURELY tap her!"

 

*points to tyranid* "Can I hug it?"

 

"Why are you even here?"

 

"Who am I?"

 

"You su-"

 

1 Helena d'Arecord is an Ordo Malleus Inquisitor Lady (Lord equivalent), and is currently a literacy character.

2 Why are there so many Daemonette ones?

Person "What did the five fingers say to the face?"

Inquisitor: .....

Person: SLAP!!! (smacks inquisitor hard enough to send him sprawling)

 

 

To a sister of Battle

Sisters repentia you say? THose broads with chains whips and swords with red hoods... kinky....!

Well in all honesty Sister the armor does kinda make your bottom look big. How big? Are you familiar with the term space hulk?

 

B) That is one of the funniest quotes in this article! You, sir, are good.

 

Thunk you. Tha Inquzition thaught I wuz disrespful. I sad it wuz tongue in cheap. Good newz the Inquzition left my cheaps.

To the Inquisitor "So how angry would you be if I shot this Guardsmen?"

The Inquisitor "Is he a HERITIC?!?"

The Reply "No.... well sort of in my eyes...Okay maybe...BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD AHAHHAAHAHAAAHAHA "

 

or another one

 

To the Inquisitor " (points at a civy)Can I shoot him?"

The Inquisitor "NO"

To the Inquisitor "aww ok how about him?(points to another civy)"

The Inquisitor "...No"

To the Inquisitor "Gah no wonder you lot are uptight"

The Inquisitor "Careful those be words of heresy"

To the Inquisitor "that would make sense"

The Inquisitor "What do you mean?"

To the Inquisitor "Well I thought the 3rd arm and horns would have given it away...BUT I think this speaks for itself (Shoots all Civys in the Area)"

The Inquisitor "HERITIC (calls for GKS)"

To the Inquisitor "WRONG!!!! Warp spawn baby haahaa(throws blood on Inquisitor) Try explaining this hahaaha (teleports away)"

GKS show up

GKS "what happened here? ...... .... Heritic SCUM DIE (kills Inquisitor)"

GKS "Good work Boys Now why did he call us?""oh well Back to Titan boys"

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