Wraiths of Darkness

[Dark Apostle Thirst]

It was in 123.M34 that Imperials first recorded the existence of the Wraiths of Darkness. On a raid of a minor Forge World, the defenders used some lost arcehotech to tap into the renegads com-network. Several conversations between what seemed to be two different warbands were recorded, and one of them was previously unknown. The other warband called them the Wraiths of Darkness, and the Mechanicus identified and entered them into Imperial records as the Wraiths of Darkness, who bore the symbol of the jagged, black blade.

 

From there on out, the Wraiths slowly became more seen and recognized by Imperials. The strangeness of this was the fact that their seemed to be no fixed area where they were located; one could not determine where they would be found next.

 

To the forces of Chaos they had been there much longer, and were much more potent. The Wraiths had fought a long existence to earn their reputation, and had become known as mercenaries and assassins who could be found anywhere. They had outposts in the Eye of Terror, the Shroud Stars, the Eastern Fringe and several other hives of Chaotic activity. If a leader had the resources, they could buy any number of Wraiths to do any job. The Wraiths, however, made a point of staying clear of the infamous Chaos Legions, knowing that their leaders would be all too keen to absorb the Wraiths into their numbers.

 

The only thing the Imperium knows about the whereabouts of the Wraiths base of operations is that it is a fleet, somewhere in the Eye of Terror. Where in the Eye is unknown, but the most frequent and largest sightings of the Wraiths have appeared there.

 

To the Wraiths themselves, their history is not so simple.

 

History

The Wraiths of Darkness have records of the Emperor's Wraiths, which they originally were, although their geneseed is now as varied as the recruits they take and the missions they are hired for. The Emperor's Wraiths history is not considered their history, but the knowledge is still kept, so that the Phantom Lords know the mistakes of the past and do not repeat them. Their history began when they fled to the Eye of Terror after a betrayal from a once close ally, and made their home amongst the other warbands. They started making a name for themselves when they assasinated the leader of a warband, followed by prompt payment from the man who became his successor. The tale travelled quickly, courtesy of the employer, and quickly gained them another commission. So began their long and successful history.

 

The Wraiths used the resources that they were paid to build up their forces. Smaller warbands were absorbed. Other mercenaries were killed. Outposts were set up. Over time the original chapter's geneseed was no longer dominant. Their fame and power grew, until the Black Legion took notice and offered them a chance to join the Black Legion. The Wraiths refused and were attacked and nearly destroyed before they escaped into the Shroud Stars. From there they left, were not seen again for five centuries.

 

Nine hundred Wraiths in a battle barge and four strike cruisers appeared in the Eye of Terror, and vanished again, something the Black Legion did not claim credit for. It soon became apparent the Wraiths were still existant, and back in their role as mercenaries, where their representitives could be found by aspiring warbands all over the galaxy. However, they still hid from the eyes of Black Legion and other major forces, and achieved this - along with their image of omnipotence - by spreading themselves very thinly, with a Summoning attached to each of the major sectors. The Phantom Lords have since deployed and redeployed the Summonings as war and image have demanded, and still do.

 

They were nearly wiped out again several times when the Wraiths overextended their forces and their leader was killed, and so developed a system of two leaders. One would watch and control the flow of Wraiths as well as take care of the other administrative duties, while the other would be the personal representative and enforcer of the other leader's will, chosen from the greatest warriors the Wriaths had availible.

 

The Wraiths knew to differentiate between the two, and so named the messenger and enforcer the Spectre of Death, while the true master was named the Phantom Lord. This known only to the Wraiths themselves, as other warbands could not attempt to enlist spys amongst the Wraiths ranks, due to their intense and tortorous recruitment method that ensured that a Wraith would only ever put his loyalty with the Wraiths. Thus, the weaknesses amongst the Wraiths and their low numbers were never known to those outside of the Wraiths of Darkness.

 

The Orginization of the Summonings in 49.M33, the Purging of the Deserters in 756.M38, and all the other great events are held only in the records of the Wraiths, kept a secret to all others. The Wraiths of Darkness must keep their reputation simple but powerful - that of mercenaries and assassins who always get the job done. Billions of humans and thousands of astartes - Loyalist, renegade and Wraith alike - have died to protect and project that image of potentcy.

 

Because of such attention that they have built, they are often requested on the battlefield thus require more astartes. The Phantom Lords have all recognized this problem and have spent vast resources into generating new astartes and acclimatizing the absorbed warbands into the mindset of the Wraiths of Darkness.

 

This was not an easy task. Many attempts to 'reset' absorbed warbands failed horribly, leaving automatons or berzerkers. Other Phantom Lords have tried to somehow make the geneseed reproduce faster, and degenerated some of it horribly. However, the Wraiths have slowly learned from their mistakes and have begun to grow their numbers to larger than most chapters.

 

The Haemon Heresy

Around 123.M38, the seed of Chaos infested the ranks of the Wraiths. In the Fifth Summoning, the Librarian had been killed, and he had not properly trained his successor. In this lull, with a force of Wraiths led by another Llibrarian, named Haemon, was en route, a few marines of the Fifth secretly started worshipping Chaos.

 

The taint slowly spread to the rest of the Summoning, given time by the long distances seperating the forces of the Wraiths. Eventually, the war-leader of the the Fifth was converted, and shortly aftwerwards the Librarian and his force arrived.

 

Haemon saw the power of those who worshipped Chaos, and initially thought to alert the Phantom Lord, but decided against it after being offered the position of power over the marines of what once was the Fifth. Haemon accepted when he was struck by a vision of himself as the Phantom Lord, and turned his powers to showing the other Librarians the power of the Dark Gods.

 

He managed to turn almost two thirds of the Wraiths before the Phantom Lord was even aware, but once he was, his response was immediate. He ordered the untainted Summonings, staunch supporters of the Phantom Lord with centuries of experience and the cynisism brought of that, to find and destroy these turncoats. The Phantom Lord and his personal staff mobilized as well, an almost unheard of action, such was the threat of the traitors.

 

Unseen war ensued. Wraiths were ambushing Wraiths, and the two forces of Wraiths fought to a stalemate, the power of Chaos and superiour numbers matching the elites of the Wraiths skill and prowess. Haemon was now called the Heretic Lord by the loyal Wraiths, his power growing with every one of his former brothers that he killed. He had no match, and even cut down the Spectre of Death in personal combat.

 

The loyalist Wraiths grew desperate then, and forced they and the traitors into one confrontation. It was there that the Loyalists used their all or nothing card, the True Wraith... and its deadliest cargo. The Wraiths battled, and eventually the Loyalists won out, but while the rest of the traitorous forces fled, the strike cruiser commanded by Haemon himself struck the already wounded True Wraith. It was crippled, but it still managed to do two key actions.

 

The first was send out an order, to immediately pursue and destroy the fleeing traitors. The second was to send a Vortex missile directly onto the bridge where Haemon was located.

 

Haemon survived, and teleported himself using his dark powers to the bridge of the True Wraith. "You fools", he spat, and dissapeared before the bolters aimed at him could fire.

 

Thanks to the orders of the Phantom Lord aboard the True Wraith, the rest of the traitors were destroyed. The only surviving rebel Wraith remains to be Haemon.

 

 

Organization

 

The Wraiths of Darkness currently have 11 Summonings, but this fluctuates as time passes - at one point the Wraiths had barely half a Summoning, and at another the Wraiths had as much as 15. The strength of a Summoning is around 110 Wraiths, but this too varies to the taste of the ruling Summoner. Many have prefered to have themselves, they're chosen bodyguard, and a few squads with a secondary command as the entirety of their Summoning, while other Summonings grow to almost two hundred marines.

 

Regardless of what the individual Summoners choose for their Summoning's size, every third recruit is organised into a seperate squad. When a full squad is formed, it is sent to the True Wraith - the personal battle barge of the Phantom Lord and his Summoning - to be trained and used to set up new Summonings. The only exception to this is extremely understrength Summonings.

 

Unlike most other warbands, the Wraiths select those worthy of command into place and execute those who kill for their position. This ensures that the Wraiths do not become disorganized and ineffeceint, and are instead well organized and extremely potent.

 

The Wraiths have no dedicated color scheme. Each Summoning is decorated differently, but almost all of them have dark, muted colors. The Summonings which are veterans of many wars uponed ruined Imperial worlds generally have dark grey markings, while the Summonings more adept at fighting in jungles - such as the jungles on Catachan - are more often found with a deep green pattern.

 

The only unifying symbol of the Wraiths of Darkness is a jagged, black knife. Even this varies, with the edge of the blade being the jaggedness of the device to it appearing that the blade itself is like a black lightning bolt. One of the few rites that all Summonings take part in is before the battle, the Sumoning's jagged blade symbol will be outlined with a thin white line, and when the dead have been gathered the survivors paint the border black again, and the slain have their borders painted red. The rest of the armor is repaired and reused, but the shoulderpad is kept with the body.

 

Beliefs

 

The Wraiths of Darkness believe in the Chaos Gods, and they believe the Emperor is a name for a technology that creates the Astrominicon. However, the Wraiths do not worship the Chaos Gods, seeing the fate of those who have turned to Chaos. This rule has been broken once, and nearly forced the Wraiths to destruction.

 

Thus, the Wraiths have raised a corps of elite Librarians who moniter the Summoning they are attached to, similar in role to a Chaplain. Each of these individual Librarians is tasked with seeking out an apprentice, so that when they fall, the apprentice may replace them. Linking with the rest of the warband quickly is only availible psychicly, and thus the Librarians are chosen only when the rest of the Librarians, most importantly the Phantom Lord, have given their leave to accept him into the brotherhood.

 

The Wraiths do believe in earning their place through a mix of natural ability and experience. They also condemn killing your superior to earn a quick promotion, in an effort to keep Chaos from invading the system. This is but one example of the many shields the Wraiths have put around themselves from Chaos, for no other Gods can truly sway the Wraiths, and the Wraiths know they must remain their own masters to prevent their eventual destruction.

 

This may prove to be their undoing, as without support from the Chaos Gods the Wraiths have much less in the ways of prosecuting their own wars, and breaking free of their eternal cycle of being hired by the next rising warband.

 

Motivation

 

There was one rare occasion where a Wraith of Darkness was captured by a successor chapter of the Dark Angels, who had mistaken the Summoning for a gathering of Fallen. When it was revealed that the captured Wraith was not a Fallen, they interrogated him and eventually discovered that although he did not serve the Emperor, he did not worship Chaos. The Interrogator-Chaplain immediately prompted him to explain what he fought for, if not the Emperor or for the false promises of Chaos. The recorded response was thus:

 

"We fight because one day, we will have earned our place in the galaxy as something more. Something that is feared and revered, something that is held as above that which others cannot acheive. To be those who can walk among the beasts of Chaos and not be attacked, to be those who would make even the Imperium pause before making war. To be unhounded by the alien, the mutant, the heretic, because we earned it, and they cannot even raise a weapon against us."

 

He was immediately executed for heresy by the Interrogator-Chaplain.

 

Recruitment

 

The most common method of recuitment for the Wraiths is for the senior members of the Summonings to stop on each populated world they pass briefly, stopping only to take the few worthy in a matter of hours, en route towards whatever target they have been hired to remove. This ensures a fairly steady stream of recruits with minimal loss of resources and time.

 

Combat Doctrine

Unusually, the Wraiths of Darkness still adhere to the Codex, due to it's flexibility. However, the Wraiths tend to be more extreme in their doctrines; when the Codex dictates that a missile launcher and a flamer be given to maximise flexibility, the Wraiths instead double up squads with two missile launchers and two flamers, with each squad breaking up into five man teams. These 'interpretations' change and are usually different between various Summonings.

 

The Wraiths of Darkness also completely refuse the usage of daemonic beings or daemonic war machines. The Librarians allow themselves to use raw Chaotic power, but do not make pacts with the beings in the Warp to gain more. Such is the path to the destruction of the Wraiths, and thus the Librarians that moniter the Summonings are monitered themselves.

 

Because the Wraiths of Darkness use a variety of geneseed, the different Summonings often have different specialties at various theatres of war. Each Summoning has it's own general combat preferences, although typically they retain enough variety in their composition to handle any obstacle. As an example, the Red Blade summoning prefers to rely heavily on fast-attack tactics using bikes and the prized land speeders, but are versatile enough to engage in other tactics should the need arise. This versatility is further enhanced by the various specialists within the Summoning.

Edited April 18, 2011 by Dark Apostle Thirst

[NightrawenII]

Ehm, man.

You have bad habit of re-posting your IAs, when something goes wrong. So my advice is, create ONE thread per IA and stick with it.

[Dark Apostle Thirst]

Ehm, man.

You have bad habit of re-posting your IAs, when something goes wrong. So my advice is, create ONE thread per IA and stick with it.

 

I tend to, don't I?

 

Hmm.

 

 

Hmmmm.

 

 

Well, that means I should stick with this thread, shouldn't I?

[Dark Apostle Thirst]

(awkward silence)

 

... Well I am going to assume that you agree that I shall stick with this thread. If you feel otherwise, the following is copy and pasteable.

 

Geneseed: of the 21st founding, it gave the chapter the ability to teleport, but the effects of said teleportation were suitably lethal. They sought refuge from the effects in Chaos, and were mostly succesful.

 

The Wraithes have begun to gather the geneseed of other warbands and chapters. They hope to eventually gather enough geneseed to create whole squads and perhaps even companies of chaos marines made up warriors with the same geneseed.

 

They have most of the eighteen geneseed, but Word Bearer, Dark Angel, and Blood Angel geneseed has become particularily elusive, and all attempts to gain Grey Knight geneseed have met crushing failure.

[Dark Apostle Thirst]

Somewhat predictable, the triple post.

 

I know I am not the only one viewing the thread, but I seem to be the only one who comments... The Wraithes will be finished regardless.

 

Homeworld

 

The Wraithes found OMaM when the populations were almost wiped out, constantly wrring at each other. It seemed that the daemon world grew rich and bountiful when whole wars worth of blood had been spilt, and so the tribes were forced to kill each other to feed their own tribes. It had gotten to the point that only a few small tribes were left, seeking each other out so that the land would grow bountiful again.

 

The Wraithes made sure that they remained apart, and began importing slave to sacrifice on the world's surface. They also started new tribes from some of the more feral slaves captured, so that when the tribes began to become massive once more they would go to war and so provide the Wraithes with more recruits than the few they had picked from here and there.

[Grand Admiral Thrawn]

The Wraithes venerate all of the Chaos Gods save Nurgle. Nurgle is seen as the Coward God, worshipped only by those who are not skilled enough to keep themselves alive and so begged for mercy - begging is an anethma to true, worthy astartes, who feel no fear. Any who show signs of cowardice are executed.

What's up fellow anti-Nuglite? ;)

 

Tzeentch is the cunning god, the one who is truly worthy of honor. Tzeentch is not mindless yet he is still incredibly lethal, he is allknowing and allpowerful. He bestows wisdom as well as power upon his champions, and is so seen as the greatest of the gods.

It would seem with this statement that the Wraiths should also hate Khorne for mindless violence and Slaanesh for mindless indulgence. At this point it seems like you're Nurgle bashing. Nothing wrong with that but it makes for better writing if you're Undivided or favor one power. Besides, Nurgle can grant gifts of endurance of incredible pain, very useful for holding vital ground or as a stinky meatshield.

 

Geneseed: of the 21st founding, it gave the chapter the ability to teleport, but the effects of said teleportation were suitably lethal. They sought refuge from the effects in Chaos, and were mostly succesful.

 

The Wraithes have begun to gather the geneseed of other warbands and chapters. They hope to eventually gather enough geneseed to create whole squads and perhaps even companies of chaos marines made up warriors with the same geneseed.

 

They have most of the eighteen geneseed, but Word Bearer, Dark Angel, and Blood Angel geneseed has become particularily elusive, and all attempts to gain Grey Knight geneseed have met crushing failure.

Why do they want companies made up of the same gene-seed source? Seems odd without any justification.

 

Orginization

So you're traitors are bigger than most Codex Chapters, even though they're from the 21st Founding where the gene-seed from here is said to be degenerating. I find this hard to believe as they would have a tough time getting supplies (read raiding) and Loyalists would be hounding you non stop, slowly dwindling their numbers over time.

 

Homeworld

Where did they import the slaves from? It would seem someone somewhere might get angry when this happened.

 

It would be easier to comment if everything was here at once for C&C rather than haphazardly added in different posts. Also, I'm too lazy to go looking for the old thread. :P

[Dark Apostle Thirst]

I see what you are saying about nurgle bashing. I'm thinking about having Slaanesh looked down upon too.

 

Khorne will always be held in grudging respect simply because his champions are amongst the best of the best in the art of killing people.

 

On Geneseed:

 

Oops. I didn't explain the whole companies thing. I figure that they have whole companies that are specialized or naturally gifted in one area, IE they have a company of White Scar marines that they have raiding most of the time, and they have some Raven Guard sneaking around gaining info on where the White Scars should be striking at.

 

On orginization:

 

The Wraithes have the unique ability to teleport, so they actually stay in one place and go to where they need to go. Their services are bought, and they tend to go grab what they need, and bring it back to the warband. Since the entirety of the warband can do this (although only the HQ do, aside from Summonings - which are the only time the rank and file are allowed to*) they can accumulate a lot of stuff in a short amount of time.

 

It's also how they get slaves - they teleport to the human, grab him, and teleport back.

 

I'm also to lazy to go back and find the old thread ;) But I'll accumulate everything into one post for you.

 

*The rank and file marines can teleport, but they aren't allowed to. They are orginized into Summonings - but the actual teleportation to the target is also refered to as a Summoning. Confusing, I need to call it something else...

[Dark Apostle Thirst]

Homeworld

 

The Wraithes found OMaM when the populations were almost wiped out, constantly wrring at each other. It seemed that the daemon world grew rich and bountiful when whole wars worth of blood had been spilt, and so the tribes were forced to kill each other to feed their own tribes. It had gotten to the point that only a few small tribes were left, seeking each other out so that the land would grow bountiful again.

 

The Wraithes made sure that they remained apart, and began importing slave to sacrifice on the world's surface. They also started new tribes from some of the more feral slaves captured, so that when the tribes began to become massive once more they would go to war and so provide the Wraithes with more recruits than the few they had picked from here and there.

 

Geneseed: of the 21st founding, it gave the chapter the ability to teleport, but the effects of said teleportation were suitably lethal. They sought refuge from the effects in Chaos, and were mostly succesful.

 

The Wraithes have begun to gather the geneseed of other warbands and chapters. They hope to eventually gather enough geneseed to create whole squads and perhaps even companies of chaos marines made up warriors with the same geneseed.

 

They hope to use the companies of one geneseed to create warriors who are unusually talented and specialized in one area and put them tow work in that area as well as teach their teleporting brethren as the best at their tasks. An example of this is to have those with Raven Guard geneseed to scout out the weak points in the enemie's army and have those with White Scar geneseed raid it.

 

They have most of the eighteen geneseed, but Word Bearer, Dark Angel, and Blood Angel geneseed has become particularily elusive, and all attempts to gain Grey Knight geneseed have met crushing failure.

 

Beliefs

 

The Wraithes venerate all of the Chaos Gods save Nurgle. Nurgle is seen as the Coward God, worshipped only by those who are not skilled enough to keep themselves alive and so begged for mercy - begging is an anethma to true, worthy astartes, who feel no fear. Any who show signs of cowardice are executed.

 

Khorne is venerated only because of the sheer lethality he bestows upon his champions. Those who follow him within the warband are constantly monitered to make sure they do not become mindless berzerkers.

 

Slaanesh is worshipped because of usefullness of her daemons. The ability to bewitch those who lack the strength of will to resist is usefull for culling the weak.

 

Tzeentch is the cunning god, the one who is truly worthy of honor. Tzeentch is not mindless yet he is still incredibly lethal, he is allknowing and allpowerful. He bestows wisdom as well as power upon his champions, and is so seen as the greatest of the gods.

 

Organization

 

Unusually, the Wraithes are orginized similar to a codex chapter. There is the command group, and Summonings about the strength of a standard company. However, there are Sixteen Summonings, and not all are company strength.

 

The First through Tenth summonings are around a hundred strong. They are usually bargained for when another warband needs an unexpected weapon to use, or a fast moving force that can take the enemy by surprise.

 

The Eleventh and Twelfth Summonings are 250 strong each, and are normally called upon to completely devastate an enemy stronghold or titan. With their superior numbers and astartes skill, they have proven the bane of many heavily defended targets.

 

The last three Summonings are much smaller, usually numbering a mere twenty Astartes. However, these warriors are the elite of the Wraithes and their skills in warfare are unmatched by any other within the warband. They are highly valued and respected amongst the Wraithes, for they are masters of the three, great tenents: stealth, fear, and surprise. As such, it is rare for the warriors of these Summonings to take to the battlefield, their skills far too valuable to risk in minor conflicts, and rarer still for these warriors to fail.

 

The reason for such large numbers is simple - the Wraithes of Darkness only fight when their services are bought or their is to be resources to be gained. Most of their traitorous existence has been spent building up supplies and marines, that being their only goal - aside from earning glory and the favor of the worthy gods.

 

And that's the entire thing in one post... I know I am missing something other than origins.

 

Also, fixed the Geneseed and Orginization.

Edited April 17, 2010 by Dark Apostle Thirst

[Dark Apostle Thirst]

Out of 8 posts, six are mine. This is probably because I don't contradict fluff, so there is nothing to comment on :)

 

I do want to apoligize, however. I had a discussion with a close friend the other day and it made me realize I am very disorganized and quickly distracted from a project. I need to get on with these IAs, I have (Wraithes, Lords, Merchants, Serpents, Angels, Hunters, Tears, Iron, Scythes.... I think I am missing two) 11 to go after all!

 

So, with that note, here begins the origins of the Wraithes of Darkness.

 

The Wraithes of Darkness were born from the Wraithes of the Emperor. This chapter was founded in the 21st Founding, and soon flourished. They earned a reputation for being elite spys and saboteurs, always at the right place at the right time, experts at hacking into the enemies comm and never letting them know.

 

Time passed. The Wraithes of the Emperor became one of the many chapters out there, with a decent history and the respect of their brothers as an equal brother. But they were not equal, for they were cursed.

 

The Wraithes of the Emperor could teleport. The effects of such journeys were extremely lethal to those without extreme protection or psychic gift. Eventually the Chapter Master himself accidentaly teleported, and was plucked from the Warp by Alpha Legionarres.

 

The Chapter Master was not forced to go through agonizing toture of the body, but rather of the mind. Constantly tempted by Chaos, shown the power he and his chapter could wield... eventually, they allowed him to escape and run back to his chapter.

 

It was there, with the power to do what the Alpha Legionarres wanted, that he faced darkest test of all. His chapter was dying, their greatest heroes being taken off into the Warp. After losing almost 75% of his First Company, he finally begged for whatever power was out there to protect them from, not kill them.

 

Tzeentch answered, and the Chapter Master led the Wriathes of the Emperor into the service of Chaos.

Edited April 15, 2010 by Dark Apostle Thirst

[Ace Debonair]

You know, I still think having the entire chapter able to teleport is overpowered.

They're Chaos marines, and wouldn't have to care about any rules that say they can't teleport, because they'd just teleport off when the big chief got angry with them.

 

Maybe it would be better to have the elite Summonings made up of the teleporty guys and then have the rest do their business the ol' fashioned way with some seriously mean sudden attack tactics.

 

Maybe also have it so nobody really knows what about the geneseed causes the ability to teleport, but it's not linked to psychic ability.

Possibly even suggest that they see it as a sign of Tzeentch's favour, bestowed only upon the worthy. :D

Just a couple of ideas to consider. ;)

 

I have to admit, I haven't commented much recently because there did seem to be a new IA for each of your chapters every time you went back to a chapter. :lol: Sticking with this thread is more likely to get you a high-quality chapter than starting again. :lol:

[Dark Apostle Thirst]

You know, I still think having the entire chapter able to teleport is overpowered.

They're Chaos marines, and wouldn't have to care about any rules that say they can't teleport, because they'd just teleport off when the big chief got angry with them.

 

Maybe it would be better to have the elite Summonings made up of the teleporty guys and then have the rest do their business the ol' fashioned way with some seriously mean sudden attack tactics.

 

Maybe also have it so nobody really knows what about the geneseed causes the ability to teleport, but it's not linked to psychic ability.

Possibly even suggest that they see it as a sign of Tzeentch's favour, bestowed only upon the worthy. :P

Just a couple of ideas to consider. ;)

 

I have to admit, I haven't commented much recently because there did seem to be a new IA for each of your chapters every time you went back to a chapter. :huh: Sticking with this thread is more likely to get you a high-quality chapter than starting again. ;)

Eh. I wanted to atleast get a start on each of them, I never intended to actually get the ones I started done right then. It was more of a chance to take a break and look at this one with fresh eyes whilst pondering possibilities with some of the other ones.

 

Overpowered? That's like saying Mephiston is overpowered (he is), but the other guy only uses one psychic power a turn. He could use three, but that wouldn't be very sportsmanlike or fluffy. Well, it might be fluffy, but only because GW said so :P

 

So, your suggestions were -

 

2) Make it unknown

3) Make it Tzeentch's favor

 

These are actually pretty good, I might take them, although the cause would still be in the geneseed. Three makes it so that only the Elites and Command could travel, as well opening up some serious plot lines that just popped into my head (sadly such occurences have become rare, must fix that). Just a hint - it involves the Spectre of Death.

 

Anyways, need to get back to that pesky little origins (all plot lines were post rebelion).

[Grey Hunter Ydalir]

To my mind the different cults within the warband are fairly... well tacked on apart from Tzeentch. The others seem to be there to give the pretence of flexibility and versatility when really the true love is reserved for Tzeentch. So, make them Tzeentch worshippers and drop the rest!

 

Tzeentch is my favourite chaos god myself (bar the mutation fetish) and I think the fact that he is such an enigma even among the chaos pantheon gives you a lot of space for evolution and experimentation.

 

I'm a little unsure on the organisation of the whole group as well. It seems, well, a little too well disciplined for a chaos warband. Even the name 'warband' evokes are more chaotic and rough and ready approach to organisation. If you explained just how and why they came to be this way I think it could work, but you have to sell it a bit more than you are right now.

[Dark Apostle Thirst]

To my mind the different cults within the warband are fairly... well tacked on apart from Tzeentch. The others seem to be there to give the pretence of flexibility and versatility when really the true love is reserved for Tzeentch. So, make them Tzeentch worshippers and drop the rest!

 

Tzeentch is my favourite chaos god myself (bar the mutation fetish) and I think the fact that he is such an enigma even among the chaos pantheon gives you a lot of space for evolution and experimentation.

 

I'm a little unsure on the organisation of the whole group as well. It seems, well, a little too well disciplined for a chaos warband. Even the name 'warband' evokes are more chaotic and rough and ready approach to organisation. If you explained just how and why they came to be this way I think it could work, but you have to sell it a bit more than you are right now.

 

Hmmm.... Juan once commented that chapter's are extensions of oneself, and I certainly did that for beliefs (Thrawn also noted this). I presented those because I was making it partial to my beliefs, not because I was trying to make the IT better...

 

You saw them as different cults. That has become the cause of something else.... a different idea...

 

Some warbands are a little more disciplined than others. Just something I tend to do, is make them more disciplined. Just had an idea to merge it with the other idea.

 

Patience. I will reveal all in time.

[Ace Debonair]

So, your suggestions were -

 

2) Make it unknown

3) Make it Tzeentch's favor

 

These are actually pretty good, I might take them, although the cause would still be in the geneseed. Three makes it so that only the Elites and Command could travel, as well opening up some serious plot lines that just popped into my head (sadly such occurences have become rare, must fix that). Just a hint - it involves the Spectre of Death.

 

Anyways, need to get back to that pesky little origins (all plot lines were post rebelion).

 

Oops, I actually meant to state in my posting of ideas it should definitely by a geneseed thing. But you could have opinion within the warband saying it's tzeentch's blessing (I also think he's the best chaos god, ar at least the least mindless and one-dimensional) and that only the worthy are given the gift, and so on.

 

 

Patience. I will reveal all in time.

 

Unacceptable! :)

 

Seriously, no need to rush. The longer you spend on the idea, the better it'll become.

[Dark Apostle Thirst]

Patience. I will reveal all in time.

 

Unacceptable! :)

 

Seriously, no need to rush. The longer you spend on the idea, the better it'll become.

 

Exactly.

[Dark Apostle Thirst]

Orginization (cont.)

 

There is actually two Spectres of Death, one who takes care of the warband and it's administrative duties, and the one who is the cause of most of the victories of the Wraithes.

 

This Spectre is the master of teleportation, shimmering behind enemies battlelines hwere they can see him, becoming clear in the presence of dying enemies. Aremed with a bloody scythe and clothed in a dark cloak, his sole duty is to completely demoralize the enemy. All such Spectres have been taught by the Night Lords.

 

Oops. Gotta go. Will add more later.

[Viray]

"Beleifs" should be spelled "Beliefs."

 

"Orginization" should be spelled "Organization."

 

You should spell out your numbers. Also, don't forget such useful tools like the colon and semicolon.

 

The last three Summonings are much smaller, usually at the strength of twenty astartes. These are the elites of the Wraithes, usually to take out an enemy commander or steal expensive archeotech. They are the masters of the three great tenets, stealth, fear and surprise. Rarely are they used in battle. Much rarer do they fall in one.

This part needs some cleaning up.

 

"The last three Summonings are much smaller, usually numbering a mere twenty Astartes. However, these warriors are the elite of the Wraithes and their skills in warfare are unmatched by any other within the warband (Chapter? I dunno the right term :) ). They are highly valued and respected amongst the Wraithes, for they are masters of the three, great tenents: stealth, fear, and surprise. As such, it is rare for the warriors of these Summonings to take to the battlefield, their skills far too valuable to risk in minor conflicts, and rarer still for these warriors to fail."

 

Not the best, but, at least I think, a little better than before.

---------------

I don't know too much about Chaos, so I can't really help with fluff issues. Fixing some grammatical and spelling issues is about the best I can do. So... yeah.

 

One last thing: why did you spell the names "Wraithes?" Just wanna know since it seems an odd way to spell it.

[Dark Apostle Thirst]

"Beleifs" should be spelled "Beliefs."

 

"Orginization" should be spelled "Organization."

 

You should spell out your numbers. Also, don't forget such useful tools like the colon and semicolon.

 

The last three Summonings are much smaller, usually at the strength of twenty astartes. These are the elites of the Wraithes, usually to take out an enemy commander or steal expensive archeotech. They are the masters of the three great tenets, stealth, fear and surprise. Rarely are they used in battle. Much rarer do they fall in one.

This part needs some cleaning up.

 

"The last three Summonings are much smaller, usually numbering a mere twenty Astartes. However, these warriors are the elite of the Wraithes and their skills in warfare are unmatched by any other within the warband (Chapter? I dunno the right term :P ). They are highly valued and respected amongst the Wraithes, for they are masters of the three, great tenents: stealth, fear, and surprise. As such, it is rare for the warriors of these Summonings to take to the battlefield, their skills far too valuable to risk in minor conflicts, and rarer still for these warriors to fail."

 

Not the best, but, at least I think, a little better than before.

---------------

I don't know too much about Chaos, so I can't really help with fluff issues. Fixing some grammatical and spelling issues is about the best I can do. So... yeah.

 

One last thing: why did you spell the names "Wraithes?" Just wanna know since it seems an odd way to spell it.

 

You have no idea how grateful I am that I can finally spell beliefs correctly. Organization I didn't realize I was spelling incorrectly, so thanks for that as well.

 

I think I'll steal that clearing up paragraph :lol:

 

I can't help but spell it like that; Wraiths just seems incomplete without that 'e' there. That's backwards for everybody else, it seems, but I'm sorry that's the way I have always spelled it and that's how I'm going to continue spelling it B)

 

If it were incorrect, it would be something else, but it's just an old, cooler way of spelling it (as opposed to an old, uncool way of spelling a word, like 'olde').

 

Anyways, I think I'll finish up that bit about the Spectre... I want him to be the most awesome generic guy I ever create, simply because he has the potential to be so.

 

I don't want him to be 'I can take on Abbaddon and Calgar with no sweat' status, but I do want him to be able to inspire fear in Chaplains.

[Dark Apostle Thirst]

Orginization (cont.)

 

There is actually two Spectres of Death, one who takes care of the warband and it's administrative duties, and the one who is the cause of most of the victories of the Wraithes.

 

This Spectre is the master of teleportation, shimmering behind enemies battlelines hwere they can see him, becoming clear in the presence of dying enemies. Aremed with a bloody scythe and clothed in a dark cloak, his sole duty is to completely demoralize the enemy. All such Spectres have been taught by the Night Lords.

 

Oops. Gotta go. Will add more later.

 

Alright, continueing with this thingy here...

 

There is actually two Spectres of Death, one who takes care of the warband and it's administrative duties, and the one who is the cause of most of the victories of the Wraithes.

 

This Spectre is the master of teleportation, shimmering behind enemies battlelines were they can see him, becoming clear in the presence of dying enemies. Armed with a bloody scythe and clothed in a dark cloak, his sole duty is to completely demoralize the enemy. All such Spectres have been taught by the Night Lords.

 

He has been taught to wear the skull helms of fallen Chaplains, and to stare officers in the eye. To silent and swift, but still advertise his presence. To take his own victims, to make the screams of the dying reach all who oppose the Wraithes, and to sut them short - and that when the bodies are found, the faces are twisted by uncontrolled fear and horror.

 

But the greatest horror waits for when the enemy finally breaks off and run. The Wraithes then go amongst them, stealing the fleeing enemy. Some are sacrificed then, simply to inspire even greater terror amongst the broken horde. Most are sacrificed elsewhere, to the Daemon World, to seal pacts with darker powers, and to Tzeentch himself.

 

And... that's it for now folks! Feel free to comment or scream in horror, just be careful that no one assumes you're a little girl! :lol:

[Ace Debonair]

There is actually two Spectres of Death, one who takes care of the warband and it's administrative duties, and the one who is the cause of most of the victories of the Wraithes.

 

This Spectre is the master of teleportation, shimmering behind enemies battlelines were they can see him, becoming clear in the presence of dying enemies. Armed with a bloody scythe and clothed in a dark cloak, his sole duty is to completely demoralize the enemy. All such Spectres have been taught by the Night Lords.

 

I dunno... I think the two spectres would be better with different names. Spectre of Death and Shadow Lord, maybe?

 

And I'm not sure about the Night Lords bit. It's like a combined name-dropping and saying that you can't train your own sneaky guys.

[Dark Apostle Thirst]

There is actually two Spectres of Death, one who takes care of the warband and it's administrative duties, and the one who is the cause of most of the victories of the Wraithes.

 

This Spectre is the master of teleportation, shimmering behind enemies battlelines were they can see him, becoming clear in the presence of dying enemies. Armed with a bloody scythe and clothed in a dark cloak, his sole duty is to completely demoralize the enemy. All such Spectres have been taught by the Night Lords.

 

I dunno... I think the two spectres would be better with different names. Spectre of Death and Shadow Lord, maybe?

 

And I'm not sure about the Night Lords bit. It's like a combined name-dropping and saying that you can't train your own sneaky guys.

 

I don't mean it to be name dropping, but the Night Lords are the best at what they do and so the Spectre pays resources to be trained by the very best.

 

Shadow Lord is already taken for another chapter by another writer, and I will be writing the IA for a slightly different name - Lords of Shadow.

 

Hmmm... What should I name the other guy?

[Viray]

I can't help but spell it like that; Wraiths just seems incomplete without that 'e' there. That's backwards for everybody else, it seems, but I'm sorry that's the way I have always spelled it and that's how I'm going to continue spelling it ^_^

 

If it were incorrect, it would be something else, but it's just an old, cooler way of spelling it (as opposed to an old, uncool way of spelling a word, like 'olde').

Whatever works for you; it certainly adds a little flair to the name. In truth, I was just really curious.

 

I dunno... I think the two spectres would be better with different names. Spectre of Death and Shadow Lord, maybe?

Seconded. It will likely prove to be incredibly difficult later to write about both Spectres without them having a distinct name to differentiate the two.

 

Hmmm... What should I name the other guy?

You're going for an "incorporeal" type theme here, right? Well, you could choose from: ghost, spirit, demon, night, black, phantasm, apparition (maybe not :P). Really, anything else to distinguish the two.

 

On this note though, are you not being a little heavy handed in detailing the Spectres? Clearly, you wish to make both terrifying apparitions of slaughter, but I think the combination of a cloak, scythe, and stolen skull mask a bit much. As he can already turn somewhat invisible and values stealth, why would he opt to wear a cloak which can rustle at the worst of times. Also, a scythe, though intimidating, isn't the best weapon to use on the battlefield, let alone by a guy trying to be inconspicuous. I do like the bit about the stolen skull mask though since it's basically giving the Imperial Faith a big, fat slap to the face while being terrifying at the same time. Rather than going with the cloak and scythe, why don't you just run with the Chaplain thing? Maybe you can have the Spectre bear a number of defiled artifacts of the Ecclesiarchy across their armor intermixed with the usual Chaos bits like spikes, the flesh of their enemies, etc. Seriously, considering that the majority of the Imperium's forces draw strength from their faith in the Emperor of Mankind, it would certainly evoke a sense of dread and disgust when they are faced with such a twisted parody of their belief whose not only getting away with such blasphemy (another blow) but killing them. :sweat:

[Dark Apostle Thirst]

I can't help but spell it like that; Wraiths just seems incomplete without that 'e' there. That's backwards for everybody else, it seems, but I'm sorry that's the way I have always spelled it and that's how I'm going to continue spelling it B)

 

If it were incorrect, it would be something else, but it's just an old, cooler way of spelling it (as opposed to an old, uncool way of spelling a word, like 'olde').

Whatever works for you; it certainly adds a little flair to the name. In truth, I was just really curious.

 

I dunno... I think the two spectres would be better with different names. Spectre of Death and Shadow Lord, maybe?

Seconded. It will likely prove to be incredibly difficult later to write about both Spectres without them having a distinct name to differentiate the two.

 

Hmmm... What should I name the other guy?

You're going for an "incorporeal" type theme here, right? Well, you could choose from: ghost, spirit, demon, night, black, phantasm, apparition (maybe not :P). Really, anything else to distinguish the two.

 

On this note though, are you not being a little heavy handed in detailing the Spectres? Clearly, you wish to make both terrifying apparitions of slaughter, but I think the combination of a cloak, scythe, and stolen skull mask a bit much. As he can already turn somewhat invisible and values stealth, why would he opt to wear a cloak which can rustle at the worst of times. Also, a scythe, though intimidating, isn't the best weapon to use on the battlefield, let alone by a guy trying to be inconspicuous. I do like the bit about the stolen skull mask though since it's basically giving the Imperial Faith a big, fat slap to the face while being terrifying at the same time. Rather than going with the cloak and scythe, why don't you just run with the Chaplain thing? Maybe you can have the Spectre bear a number of defiled artifacts of the Ecclesiarchy across their armor intermixed with the usual Chaos bits like spikes, the flesh of their enemies, etc. Seriously, considering that the majority of the Imperium's forces draw strength from their faith in the Emperor of Mankind, it would certainly evoke a sense of dread and disgust when they are faced with such a twisted parody of their belief whose not only getting away with such blasphemy (another blow) but killing them. :P

 

Hmm... I was going for the image of death, and that it seemed to serve Chaos, not the Emperor. I didn't want him to be inconspicious, but I didn't want him to be shot at either - he is there to terrify the enemy, and the only damage he causes is purely in the area of morale.

 

He is the reverse Commissar, only a lot more awseomsely terrifying.

 

I think the image of Death for the Imperials is generally the Emperor himself, either coming to claim his own or to cast down the unworthy. I was going with an out of universe image of death - so I'll definitely take your idea, maybe tweak it a little bit.

 

Hmmm....

[Captain Juan Juarez]

I dislike this "Juan once said..." business... I'm not dead y'know! :P

 

EDIT:

 

Why not simply go for "Spectre" for the behind the scenes guy and "Reaper" or some such for the 'killy-dude'.

Edited April 17, 2010 by Captain Juan Juarez

[Dark Apostle Thirst]

I dislike this "Juan once said..." business... I'm not dead y'know! :P

 

EDIT:

 

Why not simply go for "Spectre" for the behind the scenes guy and "Reaper" or some such for the 'killy-dude'.

My apoligies. I never meant to imply that you were.

 

Speaking of dead members, does anyone happen to know what happened to Solomon de Gravier? I haven't seen him post for a while now.

 

I was actually thinking of naming the guy behind the scenes the Phantom of the Opera.