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IA: The Blood Wraiths


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gallery_8960_16993_50.jpg THE BLOOD WRAITHS gallery_8960_16993_50.jpg

Chapter Name: The Blood Wraiths

Geneseed: Blood Angels (officially), chimeric (rumored)

Founding: Born from the fires of the Horus Heresy and the Great Scouring. The Blood Wraiths are a 2nd founding successor of the Blood Angels. Due to their reclusive behaviors and secretive nature, the chapter belonging to this founding and early histories are lost to almost all in the Imperium but themselves and the Blood Angels progenitors. The Marines that made up the first cadre of the Blood Wraiths came from the Terran Born revenant 99th Chapter of the Blood Angels legion. While there are undoubtedly records in the histories in the near limitless archives of the Administorium, to date few have found the need to search for them. This often leads some to believe the chapter was from the 3rd or even later founding. But the chapters histories and records lead all the way back to when they were a chapter within the Blood Angels legion at the heights of the Great Crusade.

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Homeworld: Carpathia. Carpathia is a Feudal world located deep in the isolated regions of the Scarus Sector of the Halo Stars. The Carpathian system has nine planets with Carpathia being the fifth planet. Carpathia is 70% land mass and only 30% water with most civilizations establishing themselves either near the coast or high in the mountains where there were numerous freshwater tables. The world has rather unremarkable habitat. The winters are longer and harsher than many other imperial worlds especially in the mountainous regions but the people of Carpathia have adapted well to this cold dark world. The Carpathians receive a short reprieve with a 5-month long spring like season. It is during this time when much of the planets agricultural harvests occur. The planet has a 24-month calendar cycle and is in twilight or darkness of 18 of those months. Carpathia has nine moons, 5 of which are inhabited and each of the Houses of the Blood Wraiths maintain a small bastion on each moon and orbital defense capabilities. While none of the moons had indigenous populations the Blood Wraiths Houses that occupy the habitable moons have brought serfs to these moons to harvest the moons for their resources. These people over the last 5000 years, have built civilizations that mirror those on Carpathia.

Moons

  1. Faust (Habitable) Home of the House of the Crimson Skull
  2. Sobolan (Standard Rock Moon) Home of the House of the Sanguine Scythes
  3. Solomonar (Standard Rock Moon) Home of the House of the Dead
  4. Corcoaia (Habitable) Home of the House of the Red Spades
  5. Balaur (Habitable) Home of the House of the Scarlet Clovers
  6. Moroi (Volcanic) Home of the House of the Bloodied Saints
  7. Nemorti (Habitable) Home of the House Sacred Chalice
  8. Uniila (Ice Moon) Home of the House of the Ravenous Souls
  9. Varcolac (Habitable) Home of the House of the Nine


Chapter Beliefs: The Blood Wraiths do view the Emperor as a God, but do not venerate him in the same manner as the Ecclesiarchy. Instead their beliefs are more in line with the Ordo Opscurus, believing that not just the Emperor but his sons, to Include Sanguinius have their true manifestations being held in the Warp. Like the Ordo Opscurus whom they have made a secret pact with, they seek knowledge for the resurrection of the physical God Emperor. Hoping that upon his return he will resurrect Sanguinius and end the flaw of his geen-seed in the process. This is how the Chapter will finally escape their curses.

Chapter Symbol: silver circle forming a mouth with fangs with a black field inside the mouth and a single blood drop in the center of the black field in the mouth. Their symbol dates back to the personal heraldry worn by their Praetor Lazarus Kaine who was also know amongst the legion as the Blood Wraith. The Primarch Sanguinius was well know for his distaste of his revenant Terran Born sons in the legion. These sons dated back to before the discovery of the Primarch and were part of the Legions brutal legacy. Sanguinius negatively viewed these remnant revenant sons because of the methods, tactics and brutality they would use on the battlefield. During the Great Crusades , Kaine and the 99th, knowing their Primarchs distaste for them, originally used it and a slight alteration to their chapters armor color scheme as a self imposed mark of shame for the 99th Chapter of the Blood Angels legion. The original Chapter Master Lazarus Kaine was the praetor and many of the 2nd founding brothers came from the remnants of that chapter after the Horus Heresy and the breaking of the legions by the edict of Robute Guilliman and the Codex Astartes.

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Colors: Blood red legs and lower torso and helmet with a black stripe. Black arms, chest and back packs. This scheme dates back to the time of the great crusade when the chapter adopt a partially black scheme as a self imposed death mark and mark of shame because of the negative and often disgusted view that Sanguinius had for the remnant revenant terran born sons that made up the 99th. Their new Primaris marines wear a variant scheme. This was an error on the administoriums part for their preparation and deliverance to the chapter. This variant scheme is now considered the colors to be worn by new initiates. It is red torso, red helmet with black stripe and black arms, legs and backpack. Kaine ordered all of his firstborns to cross the rubicon Primaris and it is a visual way now to also differentiate between the surviving firstborns and the new blood brought into the chapter. These new Primaris marines are not aware of the chapters secrets that at this time, Kaine intends to continue. The New Primaris are often used as assault or cannon fodder on campaigns. The intent is to widdle down their numbers and replace them with new Primaris of the chapters creation using their current gene-seed secrets.

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Chapter Master: Lazarus Kaine, the Immortal Son.

The Story of the Immortal Son:



It is believed that before the Long Night, Carpathia was once a fertile and active fringe outpost for the first empire of man in the stars. Ancient relics and signs of this long-forgotten past are littered across the landscape. Early in the Chapter’s existence circa 491 M. 32 the techmarines of the chapter discovered a weak but active energy signal deep in the Cantimir Mountains. Lazarus Kaine ordered an expedition be sent. Upon arriving the techmarines found rock debris covering the face of two large doors that appeared to be an entrance to some type of underground bunker. It took them weeks to finally excavate the site and manage to open the bunker. There was a single corridor lined with conduits that seemed to spiral downwards for several kilometers. When they reached the bottom, they found a singular large hall with thousands of cables leading to a large throne like chair sitting in the middle of the room.

The techmarines noticed, from their studies and Mars, that the design of the throne was eerily similar in size and scale to the Golden Throne used by the Emperor Himself. Immediately the techmarines notified Chapter Master Lazarus Kaine of their findings. Without Kaine arrived at the scene and began to discuss with the techmarines what this new found Archeo-tech could possibly be. They explain to Kaine what they saw and gave the only comparisons to a far more advanced version of the tutelary engines used to aid in implanting knowledge into marines as they develop. Kaine immediately ordered them to begin their investigation into the technology and ordered that no communications or discussions on this discovery be held outside of the techmarines conducting the investigation and his own personal advisors. After many long months they were able to access some of the historical data records within the machines operating systems. They noted that it was a cognitive enhancement device used for some form of ancient rite that allowed a person to transfer or share their knowledge and or access the accumulated knowledge within the countless data streams.

**********Lazarus Kaine was incredibly young for chapter master. When he was selected, many of his peers thought that he was not ready. He was sometimes arrogant brash, quick tempered and even quicker to strike. He would often "use a hammer when a scalpel was all that was needed." But Kaine had a tactical and strategic knowledge unparalleled by his peers and many senior brothers believed his nature to act quickly was more to challenge his own ability to respond to his quick decision’s repercussions rather than any true malice or arrogance. Kaine's capability in martial prowess matched his martial knowledge. When he took over the chapter, he led the Blood Wraiths in much that same way, often diving headlong into a battle and making his decisions on the ground once the enemy was engaged, thus push his and his brothers limits and forcing them to grow and adapt. Initially Kaine also highly encouraged his brother’s ferocity. **********

After months of research were completed, the techmarines believe that they could bring the system back online. Kaine insisted that he be the test subject. He would not allow any of his other brothers to do anything he himself would not, nor if there would be some dark secret held with in this machine, would he allow any other marine to potentially be exposed to whatever it may be. Kaine took the throne and the techmarines made all the necessary attachments to Kaine's body. The techmarines went through their prayers and rituals. Power was initiated and an eerie blue beam of light came from a port that opened above the throne. Kaine appeared to be in some pain but ordered the Tech-Marines not to abort the process. No matter how excruciating the pain was, he never screamed but the anguish was clear on his face. After ten minutes the machine cycled off on its own and the apparatuses affixed to him released. Kaine stood, walked a few steps, and then collapsed to the floor.

He remained unconscious for nearly seventy-six hours. A virtual lifetime to a marine when it comes to slumber. When Kane awoke the techmarines, Chief Librarian and Chaplain had many questions for him. Most of these inquiries he refused to or avoided the answer to. But he allowed the librarians and the chaplains to examine him. Once he cleared their examinations. Kaine gave several edicts.

First: Nobody but the senior techmarines, Chief Sanguinary Priest, the Chief Librarian, the Chief Chaplain and himself were to know of the chamber and its contents existence.

Second:
He ordered the Chapter’s fortress-monastery would be built atop of this bunker, and this new monastery would become the hub of the Chapter’s operations.

Third: He decreed that every year he would retreat to this chamber for a day and that if he should fall in battle his replacement must sit upon the throne and do the same as he did. The throne contained knowledge that anyone who was going to lead the chapter must have.

Fourth: He decreed a new line of succession that all future Carrion Lords will be selected from his Dhampirs and by his Dhampirs if he does not leave a clear successor named.

What Kaine did not tell them is the machine not only stores knowledge but copies the consciousness of the user. The machine shared information and forgotten knowledge with Kaine but it also explained to him it once belonged to an ancient warlord from the time before the Long Night. His consciousness eroded over the millennia, but his knowledge did not. Therefore, it must be updated regularly. the machine had now copied Kaine's consciousness to use as its new imprint. Kaine had many new voices in his head and is probably only the superhuman conditioning of space marines and the eroded consciousness record of the original user that allowed him to gain back control of his own mind.

Kaine knew however, that even though he had regained control, he was not the same man. Kaine became more measured. He was more resilient, stoic and resolved. But his rage and anger were also more intense. Kaine saw this as potential immortality. He had always believed that it was only he that was going to ever be able to lead this chapter properly. A dark arrogance and he knew it, but an arrogance that while it could lead a lesser man to the temptations of the false gods, he was aware of it, tempered it and believed it was a necessary arrogance. So it came to pass that every year, he would return to the throne room for day. This continued until 234 M.33 when the first incarnation of Lazarus Kaine fell in battle.

Kaine's first replacement was selected by the council of nine. Masaccio Moreth from the House of the Dead was the first successor to Kaine selected and as the new Chapter Master, he entered the throne and went through the process. Masaccio Moreth entered the chamber, but Lazarus Kaine returned. When he emerged from the room after sitting on the throne. Moreth in appearance only now, turned his favored combi-bolter and power fist into the armamentarium. He ordered Kaine's weapons be brought to him. Kane was known for wielding. A great power claw from the era before the crusades and a glowing red power rapier known as the Vampire’s Bite (a gift from the Blood Angels Chapter Master upon Kaine's selection to lead the Blood Wraiths.)

Moreth carried himself no differently than Kaine predecessor. For all Kaine's memories, knowledge and mannerisms seemed to be there. While Moreth’s memories were as well, the things that made him Moreth seemed to no longer exist. He called marines that were close to Kaine by the names that he had called them. He spoke to them of conversations and memories that only the two would have shared. There was a great unease developing among some of the senior brothers within the chapter because of this. the council of the nine and the Chapter Advisors approached Moreth and asked him about his experiences. He replied to him that he was Moreth, but now he was also Kaine, that the knowledge and memories gained were critical to the chapter and its continued survival. He apologized for his over familiarity with brothers he had not been familiar with before but Kaine's memories were so clear that he could see them as if they were he himself that had lived them. He understood the feelings of these brothers and with the council of the nine and the Chapter Advisors, he ordered the creation of magnificent piece of artificer armor. That every chapter master of the Blood Wraiths would wear from then on. The helmet would carry the mask of the original Lazarus Kaine and the wielder would only ever remove the mask in the company of his closest advisors or in isolation. This way anybody that would investigate the face of the mask could see the face of Kaine and not the face of the wielder, removing all future issues tied to this transformation. He consoled the fears of his brothers because his knowledge now included some truths and insights into the Imperium and the Emperor of Man, and he claimed this gave him a strong connection to the soul of their father Sanguinius. While none of that was true because the throne came from a time before the primarchs and the emperor, it did serve to sate the unease of the senior brothers and garner their complete acceptance of this new rite of passage.


And thus, was born Lazarus Kaine the Immortal Son.

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History and Organisations:



The Blood Wraiths hail from the 2nd founding and the remnants of the Blood Angels legion, when the sting of the Horus Heresy was still a fresh wound across the Imperium of man. The chapter was nearly undone by its own gene seed relatively early in their existence. Brothers within the chapter were rapidly declining into the Black Rage and the Red Thirst. Chapter records show that the origin of the chapters gene seed tithe was likely from the same batch that created the Blood Drinkers , Flesh Eaters and Flesh Tearers stocks maintained in the mechanicums vaults. Some records point to a connection with the ill-fated ******** brother chapter of the 2nd founding. Regardless of the origin of their original cadre and the gene-stock lineage, the brothers selected to form the initial chapter of the Blood Wraiths and the gene seed stock they received was barely stable. The chapters sanguinary priests constantly struggled to maintain it.

By early M. 34 the chapter was barely able to maintain a force of 400 brothers. Each new generation of brother was descending into the Black Rage more rapidly. The chapter had already begun several blood rites and rituals to stave off the thirst and the rage, but these rituals were having continuously diminishing results. Chapter Master Lazarius Kain, not willing to accept the death and decline of his chapter charged the Chief Sanguinary Priest Amen Barbal to find a solution at any cost. Brothers within the chapter started recounting to the chaplains that they were receiving dark visions in their stasis time of conversations with a shadowy figure covered in blood and sitting on a pile of skulls, promising them power and freedom from their fate. Kaine realized the dark forces of chaos we're now constantly offering dark gifts to his brothers in exchange for their service. Kaine was confident in the character and resolve of his brothers but even he knew it was only a matter of time before either the decline of their gene-seed or the temptations of chaos would doom his chapter.

The dark future of the chapter was sealed in late M. 34 with the battle of the Calixis Gate. A large Night Lords warband battlefleet in route to pillage several imperial industrial worlds was intercepted by the Blood Wraiths. A brutal void battle incurred with the Blood Wraiths launching numerous nearly reckless boarding actions on the Night Lords vessels. In the battle 2 of the Night Lords ships, one battle barge and one strike cruiser were seized. Once every life form had been purged from the ships, the Blood Wraiths began inspecting the vessels. The chaplains found few if any taints of the warp or chaos amongst the ships or equipment found. Then Kaine received a shocking transmission. A Night Lords gene-seed vault had been discovered by one of the sanguinary priests. Kaine ordered the area secure and took chief Sanguinary priest Barbal with him to inspect the vaults. The two arrived and ordered all others to leave the vault.


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Kaine: What is your assessment Barbal, and do not bore me with your long winded medical mumbo jumbo…….. I need to know, is this gene-seed pure and stable?

Barbal: Your patience as always is your greatest virtue Kaine. I cannot give you all the answers you seek right now without taking it back to the apothecarial and doing detailed examinations…….

Kaine: Dammit you infuriate me, Get to the point Barbal….

Barbal: My cursory evaluations are that it is stable and presents no warp taint to it.

Kaine: Good, have your priests secure it and take it back to your apothecarial for study. This could be our chapters salvation.

Barbal: you know what you are considering………what WE are considering is heresy and should it ever be discovered we will likely be hunted and purged. The Brotherhood of the Blood would never accept this.

Kaine: We are dying Barbal, I will not sit by and watch this brotherhood decline into beastial rage or be turned by the will of one of the false gods. We are doomed if we do nothing are we not….

Barbal: Eventually, yes….

Kaine: I do not see any of the so called “Brotherhood of the Blood” doing anything to help us, despite our pleas all the way to Baal itself. We will do whatever we must do short of accepting the blessings of the warp, do you understand me.

Barbal: Yes lord.

Kaine: then gather only your most trusted priests and do whatever must be done. And I will do what must be done to ensure the imperium never discovers what we do to survive and fight in the emperor’s name. Curse our father for these palsies and psychosis.

Barbal: My Lord?

Kaine: Do you not see it Barbal, are you that blinded by faith in our father and his martyred sacrifice that you do not realize we are no Angels in his image. Our father the Angel was just as dark inside as any of the traitors. While his only principal difference was his willingness to strive to be more than that darkness. The traitors simply chose to succumb to it. But make no mistake, we are not the avatars of his angelic beauty of divinity, we are the avatars of his darkness and for that I curse our father and no other reason. So, while we will never be angels, we will embody the darkness in his blood, his soul and his will and we will continue to use it to spit in the faces of the false gods. Now go do your duty priest and trouble me no more with your concerns.
Conversation between Kaine and Barbal:



Over time the two concocted a plan. The rest of the chapter was informed that the findings in the vault would be secured and handed over to the tech priests of mars. In truth, Barbal and his coven began slowly experimenting on the gene-seed. Over time they began infusing it with that of their own and placing this chimeric concoction in all the new initiates. A small separate stock of gene-seed was created for the sole purpose of fulfilling the required tithes to mars. this practice has been maintained to the current era. Thus protecting the true nature of the chapter.

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New Traits and Faults:


Both Gene-sires, Sanguinius and Kurze, had the gift of foresight. While no brother has developed a sense of foresight like either of the Primarchs they have developed and uncanny kind of sixth sense gaining the ability to foreshadow their enemies’ actions in combat and allowing them to react quicker by predicting their enemies’ actions. So, while the Blood Wraiths do receive a sense that heightens their reflexes even more, this sixth sense comes at a price. The merging of the two gene-seeds heightened all their extra sensory abilities. Because of this the curse of Kurze haunts them. Every brother is tormented by nightmares of their eventual brutal deaths. The nightmares become more graphic and intense to the point of near madness as the foreseen time of the Marines death closes in. It is said that no brother of the Blood Wraiths Dies a simple but a death in combat. Most are tragically brutal.

While the infusion and creation of their chimeric gene-seed did significantly slow the rise of the Black Rage and Red Thirst it does have a very unfortunate cost. When a brother does begin his descent into the Black Rage and the Red Thirst it is rapid sometimes near instantaneous and merciless. Unlike other brothers of the brotherhood of the blood where their descent can take years, the Blood Wraiths are cursed to know that if they are doomed to turn, there is no respite, no time for last glories, no goodbyes to brothers, the darkness will consume them virtually instantaneously. Because of this fact the brothers are not always able to be subdued and placed in the House of the Ravenous Souls. Many a brother has had to be put down while simply walking the halls of the fortress monastery or battle barges. This curse also makes them almost completely resilient to the methods used by chaplains of other chapters to control their Death Company brothers. The House of the Ravenous Souls will take on missions not quite different from what would be expected of a Death Company in any other Chapter of the Blood. How they differ is that If their brothers do not fall in battle they are collected up and placed in the stasis until needed again. The Chapter does not cull them. The Blood Wraiths hold onto a belief that the ravenous ones can eventually state their blood lust and there is a chance a brother may return to his sanity. This is never happened in the chapter's history but there have been those that have gained moments or periods of sanity.

By just looking at them, all the brothers of this chapter have developed solid black eyes and corpselike complexion. They are far from the near perfect Angelic appearance of the Blood Angels and look more likely a sickly cross between Blood Angels and Night Lords. Their fangs grow to near canine length and their nails grow rapidly, thick, and long, turning into claws if not constantly trimmed. The marines always give off an appearance of being hungry, looking like a starving predator staring at a potential kill. As their blood boils before a conflict the marines of the Blood Wraiths begin to pace wildly often opening and closing their fists in an aggressive manner like a beast extending and retracting its claws before it pounces. When they do not drop directly into a fight but instead have time to move in on their target, they will remove their helmets for a moment taking the time to smell and taste the air. They absorb they scents of their potential prey, licking their lips and showing their fangs like a rabid dog. Once this is done the replace their helmets and begin their hunt. When an objective has been taken and lacking follow-on orders, many marines have or a tendency to stalk other potential enemies like wounded prey to pass the time. It is a rare occasion when a Blood Wraith is calm or stationary in a battlespace they are responsible for. The Lords of the Chapter encourage this behavior, it helps to sate the marines blood lust while also having the benefit of taking out enemy stragglers or tertiary objectives that were not in the original battle plan. The Blood Wraiths tend to employ incredibly open and flexible strategies to accommodate the predatory nature of their marines.

They have incorporated the secret and bloody rituals of the Chapter into their doctrines of battle, marines will often tear apart their enemies on the field of battle or indulge in bloody feasts to break the enemy’s morale and set panic in their ranks. In the wake of victory, the elegant forms of the Chapter's brothers haunt the field of battle, seeking out the finest among the fallen and feasting upon their flesh and blood. This to steal their enemy's power from them, absorbing their knowledge and skill and making it their own.

The Blood Wraiths now bare the genetic curse of both primogenitor chapters and while they await the day they will inevitably give into the flaw or await the battle where they will face their foreseen death, some marines in the middle of battle, receive sudden flashes of Sanguinius or the Curze’s death. The flashes are not common but when they do occur it can cause a moment of hesitation that may be lethal to them. On occasion a marine will fall into a “holy trance” in which they produced stigmata, copying the bane wounds of their progenitors. The marine emits an eerie dark aura. The marine will enter a combat trance and begin wading through his enemies, seemingly impervious to harm. When the trance ends the marine will collapse and the attacks that should have wounded him while in the trance will manifest wounds that are often fatal.

An unforeseen side effect of the chimeric nature of the Chapters gene-seed is a higher-than-average failure rate of potential aspirants. The chimeric nature of the Chapters gene-seed may have slowed the degeneration, and possibly stabilized it, something in its chimeric nature causes the Blood Wraiths suffer from a higher-than-average failure rate of potential aspirants. Many recruits emerge from their transition mad or miss formed and must be put down immediately. Their gene-seed is harvested, and the process begins again. The sheer number of recruits the chapter goes through cause them to take a Blood Tithe of at least 100 males of suitable age from any world they commit action to, they do not ask or demand, they simply take. This number can increase depending on the number of casualties inflicted on the Chapter in the conflict. This is also done to not overburden the population of their homeworld where they also conduct regularly harvests for new initiates. Unlike many other Chapters, the Blood Wraiths have no ritual combat trials initiates must pass. Surviving the transformation proves enough to the Blood Wraiths.

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A Revelation of Faith:



029. M35 ‘The Phoenix Fire Incident” on the planet of Lilith Prime, the Blood Wraiths respond to a planetary Governor’s call for aid against an unknown enemy force of great power. When the Blood Wraiths responded the found themselves engaging in battle against an Emperors Children warband. As the Blood Wraiths pushed the Emperors Children back, intelligence was provided to Kaine that confirming that Fabius Bile was on the planet. Kaine took his Honor Guard and sought out the notorious Bile, following the intelligence and leads found along the way, Kaine tracked Bile to what appeared to be an archaic bunker in the high eastern deserts of the planet. Kaine and his Honor Guard entered the bunker and were almost immediate assailed by monstrous mutated creatures. After seemingly hours of fighting their way to the center of the complex only Kaine and a single member of his Honor Guard remained. As the entered the main room the noticed clear vats the size of towers filled with an unrecognizable fluid and inside these vats, attached to hundreds of tubes and cables were all forms a creatures, mutants, and beings. There were large power cables running from each vat towards a central control panel located on the southern side of the room. Standing next to the panel was a tall, wiry, old, and slightly misshapen Marine with sickly features and stringy long white hair. He turned casually and expectant towards Kaine.

Fabius: I see you received my invitation and have finally made it……. Kaine, is it not?

Kaine: So, you know of me, and were expecting me Heretic?

Fabius: Do you think in the last 4 millennia I have not learned how to cover my tracks….” Chapter Master” …. said in a slightly sarcastic tone.

Kaine: I am here to claim your head for the imperium and for the Emperor.

Fabius: Our genetic grandfather cares not for yours or any other beings’ actions, I still do not understand why so many follow this dogmatic propaganda that he cares.

Kaine: He is the God Emperor and we have not forgotten nor foresworn our oaths unlike you Bile.

Fabius: You know nothing of Gods boy, and if you did, you would know the Emperor and the other Entities in the warp, truly care little for mankind aside from using them as pawns and playthings…. including your beloved Emperor of Mankind.

Kaine: Be that as I may, my Father fell fighting the traitor Horus that you and your lot so anxiously joined, so killing you will be no small reprisal for his fate.

Fabius: Your “Father” is only as dead as the emperor wills him to be boy….

Kaine: LIAR, HERETIC SCUM, HOW DARE YOU SPEAK OF SANGUINIUS SO LIGHTLY….

Fabius: Calm down, Boy…. we would want your fatal flaw to show through, now would we.

Kaine: How Dare….

Fabius: Silence you petulant child, your ignorance is painful. I allowed you to find me and left the breadcrumbs for you to see. Look around you, in each one of these Vats is an experiment, one that gets closer and closer to the perfection the Emperor has hidden from us, the perfection he only gave to our Gene sires. I have made perfect clones of several Primarchs’ child, and a little secret for you, they ARE beings of the warp. Each time a clone was hatch, a blank genetic slab, the Primarchs’ soul found its way back to it and he remembered everything till his last memory. So, as I said, your “Father” is only as dead as the Emperor wills him to be. They are creatures of permanence that only he or one of the Chaos Gods could wipe from existence. You have been searching long and hard for a cure for your flaws, haven’t you? You have even played around with your own gene-seed, I can see it in your faces.

(at that moment bile pushed a button and a hidden weapons turret fires two rounds that hit Kaine and his last remaining Honor Guard, immediately incapacitating them. Bile walks over to the two marines now laying on the ground. Standing over the two marines bile levels his bolter towards the Honor Guards head and killed him)

Fabius: The rest of what I have to say is for your ears only. You have already played with immortality…. i can smell it, something is off about you. You are Lazarus Kaine, but you aren’t at the same time…. interesting. So, I will say this. I know the secrets of you Blood Angels bloodline, I know the rage you feel and your never-ending thirst for blood and I know the flaws of your bastard gene-father you so carelessly used thinking including his seed into your bloodline would end your curse…. creative, for a “Loyal servant of the Emperor” but naïve and reckless at best. I will leave you this date card. In it is all the truth you will ever need. But remember this boy, your flaws only exist because your “Father” fell. Should he be reborn….do you think your flaws would continue? Interesting theory…. hmm. Your incapacitation should end in about 5 minutes. In 10 minutes, I will detonate this facility and several connected facilities around the planet. So, when you are release, you can choose to follow me….and most certainly die. Or…. you can make your way out before the facility blows. Ill be watching you with interest boy.

(Kaine awoke, grabbed the data card and made his way out of the facility. He later reviewed the card in private and many things changed for Kaine and his chapter that day.)

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Death Whispers the Second act of Heresy:



038 M.35: The Battle of the Ghaulish gap. During a chaos cultist uprising in the city of Ghaul on Carpathia, The Blood Wraiths were forced into action to eradicate this upstart cult on their homeworld. During the short battle one of their brothers succumb to the rage and began rampaging through the city attacking and killing many innocents until he came across a single young boy. The brother was relentlessly pursued by his battled brothers. As the damned son approached the young buy with murderous intent, he was suddenly freed from the rage. When his battle brothers found him, he was kneeling in front of the boy with the boy’s hand upon his head. The battle brothers seized him and reported their findings to Lazerous Kaine. Kaine ordered the boy taken to be examined. It was discovered quickly by the Librarians that the boy was a Blank and his abilities were tested on several other brothers in the House of the Ravenous with similar, while also temporary results. The Librarians could also not sense the afflicted brother while in proximity to the young blank. Kaine ordered the boy be put through the gene-seed process and be trained in the ways of the chaplaincy. While this was not met with confidence by his brothers, it was done. The boy managed to survive and was trained. He was known as the Death Whisper and rarely left the quite sanctity of the chapters stasis crypts. With this success Kaine ordered that the Chaplains responsible for the chapters ritual harvest for recruits go out of its way to find others like the first death whisper.

The genetic lineage of the people of the planet of Carpathia produces an unusual number of human blanks. While most of these blanks are taken by the inquisitorial Black Ships, The Blood Wraiths have managed over time to figure out a way to hide some of the young male blanks. An more simplistic approach to this concept would be the chapter never holds onto more then one Blank per assessment. During the Harvests they Identify and hide some of these recruits deep in the crypts of the fortress monastery. This dark secret, without a doubt would be considered an act of heresy by the inquisition. Kaine knows this truth and he and his chapter are committed to hiding both of their dark secrets at all costs. This Dark secret came at a cost. In 348 M. 36 a senior Inquisitorial member of the Ordo Opscurus figured out in part what the Blood Wraiths were doing. He summoned that incarnation of Lazarus Kaine to come before him. Kaine knew that the Ordo Opscurus were all secretly Incarnationist, a belief he was starting to see merits in himself, especially after his encounter with Fabius Bile. Kaine now believes that the chapter can only gain freedom from the Flaw through some sort of reincarnation of Sanguinius. With the knowledge he gained from Bile, he believes only the risen Emperor could perform. So in this endstate, his motives align with the Ordo.
Little is know what was said between the Inquisitor and the Carrion Lord but it is certain some dark bargain must have been struck because the chapter was not only allowed to survive and not be censured, they were allowed to continue with their efforts.

The Death Whispers are small in number, never more than 5 have been had in the chapter at one time and many live extremely long lives. It is believed by the Librarius, Chaplains and Sanguinary Priests that their very nature as a Blank staves off the Black Rage and Red Thirst. Because of how rare these brothers are, it is only in the darkest of the chapters hours that a Death Whisperer maybe committed to combat, they almost exclusively live with in the house of the ravenous souls. They use their apocryphal abilities to sedate or even state the rage and lust of their brothers and help to calm their nightmares to a point. A secondary benefit is that for some reason the Death Whispers are able to break the psychic connection Astorath the Grimm has with seeking these brothers that have succumb. While they are rarely committed to the battlefield, when they are it is typically catastrophic for the enemies of the Blood Wraiths.

http://bolterandchainsword.com/uploads/gallery/album_16993/gallery_8960_16993_43050.jpg

Battle Organization:



The Blood Wraiths are not codex compliant. They Have 9 Sanguine Lords that rule over 9 houses. Each house is a company plus in size and has its own flotilla. The houses hold regular joint Harvests of new initiates, any male of appropriate age is taken. the House with the fewest numbers selects first (except the House of the Ravenous) and so on until all have replenished their ranks. Failed initiates are sacrificed in blood rituals for the chapter and their names are added to the tomb of sacrifice. A successful initiate becomes a Brother stays in one house their entire life.

The House of the Crimson Skull

The House of the Sanguine Scythes
The House of the Dead
The House of the Red Spades
The House of the Scarlet Clovers
The House of the Bloodied Saints
The House Sacred Chalice

The House of the Ravenous Souls(Maintains the Chapter's Death Whisperers)
The House of Nine (thought to originally be the first company during the early codex compliant days of the Chapter) Now they are the guardians of Chapter's oldest relics.

The unofficial 10th House is the Honor Guard and the tithe of 10 marines from each house to serve in the Carrion Lord's personal strike force.


The council of the nine Lords of the Houses meet and choose brothers from their ranks (he does not have to be a Lord of a house) to serve as the Dhampir Gaurd for the Carrion Lord, and the Carrion Lord or one of his Dhampirs under a specific charge alone can override a Lord of a House. If the Lord of a house is chosen by another Lord to serve in the Dhampirs, he must relinquish his House to another. The chapter also holds the number 9 sacred; this is likely a link back to the days of the legions.

The Carrion Lord and his Dhampirs are the keepers of a great secret of the chapter. The chimeric nature of their gene-seed. While the
the lords of all houses and tribunal of nine lords were the original selectors of the first replacement Carrion Lord to the original Kaine, Kaine thought it wise that the knowledge of his origins and dark secret die out with the nine lords over time. Now the nine lords select the Dhampirs, when one dies in battle another is chosen to replace him. The chosen brother gives up his previous identity and serves in the Dhampirs for life. Kaine will name his successor from the Dhampirs so being in his elite guard is both an honor and a curse. Should Kaine fall in battle, his successor and the Dhampirs know what acts and rites to carry out to replace him. The lords of the houses are part of a tribunal each master of their own fates but owe a blood oath to the Carrion Lord. This ties into other questions, what has fractured the house. It is believed the tribunal once was completely United but over time the isolation between the houses, their autonomy and grudges held over petty slights that occurred in battle, or favoritism played by the carrion Lord over time, have divided them and their agendas.


It is believed that in their origins the nine lords would use some form of democratic selection to choose the Carrion Lord. But the second incarnation of Kaine that was originally Moreth, changed the order of succession. Now each house can nominate a brother to the Dhampirs and it does not have to be a help a brother from their own house. If the lord of the house is nominated he also must join the brothers fighting the ritual battle royal to replace the fallen Dhampir. The combat is not supposed to be to the death, but it happens sometimes. The winner becomes the fallen Dhampir and is brought into the Carrion Lords inner circle. It is here he learns many of the truths of the Chapter, but not all of the details. This can also be used as a complex power move between the houses, a rival Lord can recommend his foe in hopes he will win the melee and be forced to leave his position as a house lord.

Unit Markings:

The Blood Wraiths are non-codex compliant even in their markings. Brothers do not wear unit or squad markings. They bear the mark of their house where the unit marking would typically go on the right shoulder pad. Rank is delignated by helmet color:

  1. red with black stripe is a normal battle brother.
  2. black with red Stripe is a sergeant.
  3. black with red Stripe and a silver skull is a veteran.
  4. black With red stripe and a gold skull is a lieutenant.
  5. Captains typical wear artificer armor and bear a command sigil.

The exception to the non codex markings. Each House sends 12 Marines, 10 marines and 2 specialist to serve in the Carrion Lords personal strike force. It is a great honor to be selected. While serving the Carrion Lord they remove all House symbols and are put into mixed squads. These marines will wear the traditional codex markings for unit type and squad they are in.

Honor Duels and Marks of Shame:

The Blood Wraiths are fiercely competitive amongst the 9 Houses, constantly vying for opportunities to prove their martial prowess and results against the other Houses. Honor duels between houses are common and normally to first blood, but the chapter does allow for battles to the death if the perceived slight to one’s honor is deemed high enough to merit it and only if both parties accept the challenge rules. If the challenged does not, then the challengers honor is automatically met. However, the challenged can also call for this duel to the death, when a challenger’s accusations are so demeaning that simple first blood is not enough to sate the insult they have been given. In this case if the challenger refuses, his claim is negated and the challenged regains his honor. When two or more Houses are committed to a campaign without the Carrion Lord leading them or a directly appointed leader by the Carrion Lord, honor duels are held to determine which House will be in command.

There are several ways for a brother to gain a mark of shame. Failure on the battlefield, partaking in unscheduled or unsanctioned blood rites or losing and honor duel to a member of a different house. These markings typically are the recounts of the infraction inscribed on the Marines right shoulder pad and remain their until he redeems himself. He is ostracized from his house and is committed to every campaign he can. While marked he is given only a bolt pistol and a power sword. The Marked brother must then search out and fight the most difficult foes he can find on the battlefield. Redemption is found only when he has killed enough enemies to regain his honor or dies trying. The marked are shunned by their Houses in the ceremony of 1000 cuts. The marine sheds all armor until he is only wearing a loincloth. The members of his chapter line up in two columns ands draw their daggers. The brother walks the path between the two columns where each brother makes a cut into the Marines flesh. He is given back his armor now bearing the mark of shame and resides in the chapter chaplaincy area. There he will be constantly tasked to enter numerous battlefields to seek his atonement.

Blood Rituals:



Early in the chapters incarnations the Blood Wraiths established numerous unsanctioned blood rituals, sacrifices and the practice cannibalism rituals of their fallen brothers stave off the Black Rage. The Blood Tithe, every 10th year the population of Carpathia submit their terminally sick and elderly to the Blood Wraiths. The Chapter anesthetizes the tributes and drains their blood into the life blood of the chapter. The brothers then sleep for days in the blood-filled caskets to feed and rejuvenate. Failed Initiates are subjected to the same fate. The names of all sacrificed are added to a volume of the Tomb of Sacrifice, to honor them, it is one of the two sacred relics to the chapter. While dark and barbaric, these Blood Tithes have helped to stem the tide of disease and plague on Carpathia.

The brothers also spend a significant amount of time and stasis chambers where they are serenaded around the clock by their chapter serfs, an organization called the Sirens of Sanguinius.

The Dhampirs:

The Dhampirs are the Blood Wraiths version of the Sanguinary Guard. They serve as an honor guard for the Carrion Lord and also serve as his enforcers when their are internal disputes between the houses. The Dhampirs are all champions in their own rights and normally some of the fiercest and most cunning warriors of the Chapter. Each member forgoes their previous existence and pledges their life to the service of the Carrion Lord. Dhampirs stay in service until their death and are no longer considered for any other position in the Chapter. While a single Dhampir may be charged with leading a battle force they do not hold any permanent command positions. They are by position and virtue, the voice and will of the Carrion Lord. In these roles they can out rank the Lord of a House, but only when acting on the Carrion Lords will, not their own.

Sirens of Sanguinius:



Unlike other chapters the brotherhood of the blood, the Blood Wraiths maintain a small chamber militant made exclusively of women that were taken from the orphanages of Carpathia and trained in the arts, principally music but also given training in numerous martial studies.

These women from form the serfs, servants, care givers and defenders of the fortress monastery. One of their duties is for them to serenade the sleeping brothers of all the houses while they slumber in their stasis crypts. The Sirens are also responsible for waking brothers from their slumbers, performing certain blood rites and arming the brothers for their duties. They are unquestionably loyal to the houses they are signed and serve until their last breath. A part of Sirens death their blood is drained and added to the life fluids of the chapter and their bodies are entombed in the chapters crypts to slumber permanently alongside the brothers they served in life. Because their service is so cherished, their names added to the chapters Tome of the lost alongside the names of the brothers that fell in service to the emperor. The Tome of the lost is one of the two holiest relics to the chapter.

Relations with others of the Blood:



The Blood Wraiths have always been distant from the others of the blood for many reasons to include the gene-seed heresy they committed. Avoiding most contact. In late M.40 before the fracturing of the imperium of the Citrix Maledictum, Kaine sought out Dante over an incident involving Astorath the Grim.

Excerpt from the conversation:

Dante: Why do you deny Astorath the right to give Sanguinius peace to your afflicted brothers Lazarus.

Kaine: Are we that familiar, Dante, that you call me by a name my own brothers rarely use? Or do you presume your place as Chapter Master of the Blood Angels gives you rights and privileges over me?

Dante: that is not what was said nor intended and your hostility in unwarranted and unneeded.

Kaine: Yet Astorath sought to slay one of MY brothers! A soul in my charge and my keeping. Is this not a type of arrogance and exertion of a presumed power if not by you then by extension, him.

Dante: He was serving the will of Sanguinius and doing his duty.

Kaine: So now you all proclaim to know the will of our fallen father? No, I do not accept your narrative, or Astorath's. Keep your dog on his leash when it comes to my chapter, we will handle our brothers that are afflicted in our accordance with OUR traditions and OUR ways not yours. If I see his ship anywhere near my system or a battlespace we control, the next time I will not simply seek an audience with you to discuss his presence, the next time we will handle it in OUR ways.

Dante: You would threaten open conflict and fracture the brotherhood?

Kaine: I have always and will always do what is best for MY chapter Dante, not some idealistic belief in some failed bond between the other sons of Sanguinius.

This fracture led to the Blood Wraiths' refusal to respond to the Blood Angels' calls to defend Baal. The Blood Wraiths do not see Baal as their spiritual home, nor do they hold the same reverence for their genetic father. While the Blood Wraiths gene-seed is officially chimeric in the M.41 timeline they do still consider themselves Sons of Sanguinius and do not even acknowledge the other half of their chimeric seed.

Notable Actions:

544-546.M32. War of the Beast: During the War of the Beast the Blood Wraiths home sector was besieged by previously unmatched numbers of Orc Warbands. The Blood Wraiths launched brutal and devastating attacks on the Orcs. Their astropaths received the calls for aid from Terra. The entirety of the Chapter attempted to reach Terra but only found themselves in a long, slow methodic campaign to get their. While the Blood Wraiths never made it to Terra, they did inflict heavy casualties to the Orcs along the way. Once the Orc leaders were defeated the orc masses began to fight amongst themselves and break apart. With this the Blood Wraiths were able to return to their own system and begin to rebuild and recoup their own losses.

038 M.35: The Battle of the Ghaulish gap. (See previous excerpt on The Death Whisperes).

323-397.M35: Chapter Schism - The fracturing of the Nine Houses. Once the truth of the chimeric gene-seed was found out by the leaders of the chapter, there was a internal power struggle and even at times civil war within the chapter over the issue. Several Houses felt betrayed by Kaine's' and Barbal's actions. Seeing it as the heresy it was, the chapter nearly collapsed from all of the internal struggles and fighting. Most records from this time have been sealed or destroyed, but somehow Kaine was able to regain the favor and loyalty (begrudgingly) of the fractured Houses. The events that occurred during this time were what caused the almost complete split from codex organizational structure to the organization the chapter now employs.

Age of Apostasy: During the Age of Apostasy the Blood Wraiths took no side on the internal struggles within the Imperium. While they do revere the Emperor as a living God, they do not worship him in accordance to, nor agree with the tenants of the ecclesiarchy. They view the internal political and religious struggles as beneath them. They serve the Emperors will and do not need some priest of zealot to provide sermon or guidance on how to carry out his will.

941.M37-238.M38: The Blood Hunt - During this time the chapter focused all of its efforts into hunting down and destroying "The Risen", a Night Lords Warband that had raided one of their vessels and stole some of their gene-seed. While the irony was not lost to Kaine, he could not let the truth of his past be known. The Blood Wraiths scoured and hunted every Night Lords vessel, raiding party and warband they could track until they were finally able to recover the stolen gene-seed. The Blood Wraiths kept no detailed records during this time. Kaine hunted down each and every member of the Night Lords warband, deleting their existence from history.

898 M 41: Battle of the Swarm - (the Blood Wraiths first encounter with the Tyranids) In the far reaches of fringe space the Blood Wraiths were waging a campaign against and alien race only designated as “The Geist”. While battling the Geist on an unregistered feral world, both armies were attacked by large swarming arthropods. These beasts were able to rip through the Marines power armor and caused unexpectedly high number of casualties. The Blood Wraiths were able to rally and fend them off. They immediately took advantage of the arthropods attacks on the Geist and struck a fierce and final blow. Their encounter and all data were sent to the fleet. Reports from the Blood Wraith fleet overhead yielded a positive connection to the xenos species named the Tyranids who were first recorded in the Eastern fringes on 745.M41. the number of xenos life signs was increasing rapidly and realizing that they had only encountered scouting forces, the marines returned to the fleet. In orbit above the world, Lord Dorian of the House of the Dead, ordered an extermanatus of the world.

Current Time: With the Opening of the Cicatrix Maledictum, the Blood Wraiths found themselves even more isolated than they typically were prior. The system became besieged by all manner of warp spawn and Dark Eldar raiders attempting to take advantage of the chaos. The need to secure their own assets and borders, combined with their already existing rivalry with their progenitor chapter the Blood Angels, prevented them for answering the call to defend Baal. It is however unlikely that they would have responded anyway.

Edited by Bloodwraith
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The Blood Wraiths seem very similar to the Flesh Eaters. Hell, your Chapter planet's name is near-identical to that of the Flesh Eaters in non-canon works! You may want to look beyond the "Dracula as a Blood Angel" idea, to differentiate and distinguish the Blood Wraiths- maybe Francis Varney? Oda Nobunaga as a vampire who's a Blood Angel?

 

Nitpick:

Symbol: Silver circle forming a mouth with fangs (similar to world eaters) with a black field inside the mount and a blood drop

Emphasis mine. I think you meant to use "mouth" instead if "mount".

The chapter actively recruits and locates male Blancs.

Why is blank spelled with a "c" replacing the "k"?
Edited by Bjorn Firewalker
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The Blood Wraiths seem very similar to the Flesh Eaters. Hell, your Chapter planet's name is near-identical to that of the Flesh Eaters in non-canon works! You may want to look beyond the "Dracula as a Blood Angel" idea, to differentiate and distinguish the Blood Wraiths- maybe Francis VarneyOda Nobunaga as a vampire who's a Blood Angel?

I was inspired by flesh eaters and blood drinkers and even considered their Gene seed and lineage as the donators for this chapter.  However when I looked them both up i never saw any reference to a homeworld, plus I already have custom parts commissioned, built and on there way with Carpathia so not worried about non cannon works, so pretty committed to that now. The ritual idea came from the Blood Drinkers. The long term resistance to the rage, but then immediate fall and lack of a death company of true note didn't really see in any of the chapters i looked at.

 

Recruitment is from a blanket harvest. I didn't see any of the chapters break into houses or stay in a house their whole time. The Vampire who is a blood angel is the angel i am going with. Once I fluff Carpathia out more it will be a world more like the Night Lords homeworld, brutal with blood rituals etc. I had even considered the reason their geneseed has stabilized to allow prolonged resistance was because it is now Chimeric. early in M34 their chapter was dying and the chief apothecary and chapter master concocted a plan after the chapter had defeated a Nightlords host and siezed untainted geneseed. They were desperate and began to experiment with using mixed geneseed, a dark secret they only pass on to the next in their line of succession.  

 

because of this mixture the brothers of the Blood Wraiths all have a kind of sixth sense or forshadowing that allows them to almost predict their enemies actions, but the curse of it is that every brother is tormented by nightmares of their brutal deaths. Basically they get a small advantage in exchange for a brutal assault on their sanity. this is why when they do turn it is so quick. I even considered them becoming bestial or nosferatu in appearance when it happens. all stuff still to fluff out. Thoughts?

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However when I looked them both up i never saw any reference to a homeworld,

There's no reference in the Wiki, but "Karpathia" (spelled with a "K" replacing the "C") was used in fan works from the mid-2000s, which long-time board members are aware of, as noted in the link I provided.

The ritual idea came from the Blood Drinkers. The long term resistance to the rage, but then immediate fall and lack of a death company of true note didn't really see in any of the chapters i looked at.

Fair enough. This idea IS original.

The Vampire who is a blood angel is the angel i am going with.

This idea is NOT original. I wish people would broaden their views to accommodate alternative visions. For example, Gamiel took inspiration from Stephen King's short story The Night Flier when he created his IA Chapter.

I had even considered the reason their geneseed has stabilized to allow prolonged resistance was because it is now Chimeric.

I find this EXTREMELY unlikely. It's more realistic (and less Mary Sue-ish) to say using chimeric gene-seed reduced the impact of the Red Thirst and the Black Rage, but it also introduced new and different gene-seed flaws (increased occurrences of mutation, like the Carcharodons, whose Chief Librarian has denticles, a shark's teeth-like scales? psychic visions, like that which plagued Talos Valcoran?), which the Chapter struggles to correct.

early in M34 their chapter was dying and the chief apothecary and chapter master concocted a plan after the chapter had defeated a Nightlords host and siezed untainted geneseed. They were desperate and began to experiment with using mixed geneseed, a dark secret they only pass on to the next in their line of succession.

 

because of this mixture the brothers of the Blood Wraiths all have a kind of sixth sense or forshadowing that allows them to almost predict their enemies actions, but the curse of it is that every brother is tormented by nightmares of their brutal deaths. Basically they get a small advantage in exchange for a brutal assault on their sanity. this is why when they do turn it is so quick. I even considered them becoming bestial or nosferatu in appearance when it happens.

Good ideas, but their execution and presentation must be carefully done, lest the Blood Wraiths seem Mary Sue-ish in other board members' eyes.
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There's no reference in the Wiki, but "Karpathia" (spelled with a "K" replacing the "C") was used in fan works from the mid-2000s, which long-time board members are aware of, as noted in the link I provided.

 

I understand, but I am not shifting solely based on a fan fiction. I have been working on my Blood Wraiths in some form since 2004 and Carpathia was always there homeworld in every incarnation i had. so I will keep with it. If GW makes it cannon ill adjust. 

 

Good ideas, but their execution and presentation must be carefully done, lest the Blood Wraiths seem Mary Sue-ish in other board members' eyes.

 

I actually don't want them to be marry sue at all, I want them to be extremely tragic and having to go to extremes just to survive. its why i have tried to give a negative for every positive.

- disenfranchised from the other brothers of the blood and isolated.

- willing to commit a form of heresy in allowing blanks as brothers solely to calm the slumber of the lost.

- using rituals they themselves find barbaric solely to sate the curse of their geneseed

-developing a self loathing and almost loss of reverence for their gene sire

- precognition or basic sixth sense in exchange for near waking nightmares and the ability's to see their own deaths (also possibly a curse from the forces of chaos to go along with them making the geneseed chimeric....if i go that route... is that their deaths are normally brutal in nature even for a space marine.)

- no gradual fall to the rage, it is near instant and transform them even in physical appearance.

 

This idea is NOT original. I wish people would broaden their views to accommodate alternative visions. For example, Gamiel took inspiration from Stephen King's short story The Night Flier when he created his IA Chapter.

 

I understand your point on the Vampire thing, but that is the angle I want, I love this eastern European lore and i live here in eastern Europe right now . I understand there are alternatives but there just are not of interest to me. i had considered the Japanese themes ect, but I wanted a more Slavic/Romanian take on it. Ultimately why write an IA if i dont like the lore or myth i am drawing from.

 

I find this EXTREMELY unlikely. It's more realistic (and less Mary Sue-ish) to say using chimeric gene-seed reduced the impact of the Red Thirst and the Black Rage, but it also introduced new and different gene-seed flaws (increased occurrences of mutation, like the Carcharodons, whose Chief Librarian has denticles, a shark's teeth-like scales? psychic visions, like that which plagued Talos Valcoran?), which the Chapter struggles to correct.

 

That is essentially what i mean, you just phrased it better. :smile.:

 

I am also considering that the Houses are simultaneously brothers and adversarial for some reason, almost territorial and it is solely by the will of the Carrion Lords that the chapter is held together.....kind of like Vampire the masquerade where the prince of the city keeps the clans in line through the council to keep them from devolving into civil war.

Edited by Bloodwraith
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I understand your point on the Vampire thing, but that is the angle I want, I love this eastern European lore and i live here in eastern Europe right now . I understand there are alternatives but there just are not of interest to me. i had considered the Japanese themes ect, but I wanted a more Slavic/Romanian take on it. Ultimately why write an IA if i dont like the lore or myth i am drawing from.

Fair enough. Why not use more aspects from Slavic myths, e.g., Solomonarie and its Solomonari (students), of which Dracula was allegedly a member, in Bram Stoker's novel? "Carrion Lord" can work as one of MANY titles the Chapter Master has, which include "Dragon Lord" and "Storm Lord" (the Solomonari are said to ride dragons and control the weather), "Keeper of Keys" and "Master of the Seal" (after the "Key of Solomon" and the Seal of Solomon, as the school is allegedly named after the king), the latter titles used in diplomatic functions where it is unwise to threaten one's own allies.

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I am also considering that the Houses are simultaneously brothers and adversarial for some reason, almost territorial and it is solely by the will of the Carrion Lords that the chapter is held together.....kind of like Vampire the masquerade where the prince of the city keeps the clans in line through the council to keep them from devolving into civil war.

In that case, how does the Blood Wraiths choose a new Chapter Master when one inevitably falls in battle? Do the Houses fight amongst themselves, choosing new leaders according to the principle "survival of the fittest"?

Edited by Bjorn Firewalker
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Fair enough. Why not use more aspects from Slavic myths, e.g., Solomonarie and its Solomonari (students), of which Dracula was allegedly a member, in Bram Stoker's novel? "Carrion Lord" can work as one of MANY titles the Chapter Master has, which include "Dragon Lord" and "Storm Lord" (the Solomonari are said to ride dragons and control the weather), "Keeper of Keys" and "Master of the Seal" (after the "Key of Solomon" and the Seal of Solomon, as the school is allegedly named after the king), the latter titles used in diplomatic functions where it is unwise to threaten one's own allies.

 

I like this idea, the Carrion Lord, or Lord of all Houses and the tribunal of the nine lords are the keeper of the great secret of the chapter (the chimeric nature of the genseed maybe) and the Lords of the houses are part of a tribunal, each a master of their own fates but owe a blood oath to the carrion lord. This ties into your other question. The tribunal once was completely united but over time the isolation between the houses, autonomy and petty slights that occurred in battle or by favoritism played by different carrion lords over time fractured them.

 

In that case, how does the Blood Wraiths choose a new Chapter Master when one inevitably falls in battle? Do the Houses fight amongst themselves, choosing new leaders according to the principle "survival of the fittest"?

 

I originally had the idea that they would select a member democratically, but now i think each house can nominate a brother and it doesn't have to be from their house nor does it have to be the Lord of the House. These nominated brothers fight in a ritual battle royal, not meant to be to the death but it happens sometimes, and the winner becomes the Carrion Lord. It can also be a political move, say two houses are feuding, one nominates the others Lord or champion hoping they will lose or die in the conflict.

 

more ideas are greatly welcomed. i will do some editing this week.

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Do the blanks help shield those suffering from the Black Rage, from Astorath's psychic senses, so the Blood Angels High Chaplain isn't drawn to investigate the Blood Wraiths? As the Chapter is still listed as a Blood Angels successor, Astorath will inevitably come to examine its Death Company members; saying, "The Blood Wraiths have no death company," will just make the High Chaplain more suspicious (his senses were strong enough to discover the Swords of Haldroth were NOT descended from the Ultramarines, as stated in the Chapter's records, but from the Blood Angels). Admittedly, the blanks may shield their charges' minds and prevent Astorath from learning the Blood Wraiths' secrets.

 

How is the Blood Wraiths' relationship with the Blood Angels and other successor Chapters, anyways? From your description, I doubt it's close. Are the Blood Wraiths aloof, i.e., thet avoid interacting with other Blood Angels descendants as much as possible? Hostile, the hostility intended to make the Blood Angels shun the Chapter, so the Blood Wraiths' secrets won't be revealed? Maybe a mix, e.g., they closely collaborate with the Flesh Tearers (who appreciate the Blood Wraiths' ruthlessness), but more traditional Blood Angels successors view the Chapter with disgust?

I originally had the idea that they would select a member democratically,

Maybe the Blood Wraiths DID choose leaders by popular vote, when they were founded; but after [insert incident] in which the Chapter Master failed, the Blood Wraiths decided it was foolish to choose their leaders based on "popularity contests," and went with the ritual battle royale described below?

but now i think each house can nominate a brother and it doesn't have to be from their house nor does it have to be the Lord of the House. These nominated brothers fight in a ritual battle royal, not meant to be to the death but it happens sometimes, and the winner becomes the Carrion Lord. It can also be a political move, say two houses are feuding, one nominates the others Lord or champion hoping they will lose or die in the conflict.

Good ideas.
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Do the blanks help shield those suffering from the Black Rage, from Astorath's psychic senses, so the Blood Angels High Chaplain isn't drawn to investigate the Blood Wraiths? As the Chapter is still listed as a Blood Angels successor, Astorath will inevitably come to examine its Death Company members; saying, "The Blood Wraiths have no death company," will just make the High Chaplain more suspicious (his senses were strong enough to discover the Swords of Haldroth were NOT descended from the Ultramarines, as stated in the Chapter's records, but from the Blood Angels). Admittedly, the blanks may shield their charges' minds and prevent Astorath from learning the Blood Wraiths' secrets.

 

I like your thought process, they serve two purposes, first is to keep Astorath and the prying eyes of the Blood Angels away from them and second it is to help ease the brothers tormented slumber. The few times Astorath has attempted to hunt some of their brothers or confront the chapter he has been turned away by threats of force. This was followed by a chastising from Dante but the Blood Angels received this response, "We are of the Blood but we are NOT your blood brothers to command, nor do we bend any knee or owe any serfdom to you or your chapter, keep your dog on his leash, we will handle our brothers in accordance with OUR traditions and OUR ways, NOT YOURS." END TRANSMISSION.  They did not respond to the calls to BAAL. They received their primaris upgrade information and seed, but took no greyshields. They manage functional relations with the Blood Drinkers, Flesh Eaters and to a lesser extent the Flesh tearers but NO others. In fact before their dissapearnce they actualy came into conflict with the Lamenters over them taking a tithe of new initiates from a planet both fought on.

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Feels like you are going for a grim-gothic theme here. If so, I suggest looking at the works by Poe and the movie adaptations of them; Universal and Hammer movies taking place in Mainland Europe; the horror-ish comics by Richard Corben; Vampire Hunter D; Warhammer Fantasy's Vampire Counts stuff; 

 

If you plan to model the Blood Wraiths (and have money to burn) do I suggest making the dreadnoughts as iron maiden like as possible.

 

Death Whisperers:

 

The Blood Wraiths have a dark secret and do commit a secretive act of heresy. The chapter actively recruits and locates male Blanks. The children are turned into marines but immediately trained in the ways of the chaplain. While they are not formally admitted into the chaplain ranks, the Death Whisperers hold a special place of honor in the chapter. The stay exclusively in the House of the Ravenous Souls. It has been found that their apocryphal abilities sedate and and sate the rage of their brothers entombed here, calming their dreams and nightmares to a point. rarely are they ever committed to the battlefield but when they are it typically is catastrophic for their enemies. 

How do they get the Blanks? They are supposed to be very rare after all. Some kind of secret agreement with the right Inquisitor order? Or obscure Imperial branch connected with the Black Ships? 

 

Carpathia:

 

Carpathia has nine planets in its system and is a typical habitat world, while the winters are longer and more harsh then many other imperial worlds there is a short reprieve of a small spring like season. the planet has a 24 month cycle and is in twilight or darkness of 18 of those months. Carpathia has nine moons, 5 of which are inhabited and each of the Houses of the Blood Wraiths maintain a small bastion on each moon and orbital defense capabilities.

What kind of world is it by Imperial classification? Feral, Feudal, Imperial, Hive, Agri or something else?

 

 

However when I looked them both up i never saw any reference to a homeworld,

There's no reference in the Wiki, but "Karpathia" (spelled with a "K" replacing the "C") was used in fan works from the mid-2000s, which long-time board members are aware of, as noted in the link I provided. 

I would say that Bloodwraith should not be bound that just because somebody else had a similar idea should he not use his own. Also the galaxy is a big place so there should be many worlds with similar names (there is likely at least hundreds of "New Terra/Earth" around).

 

 

 I was inspired by flesh eaters and blood drinkers and even considered their Gene seed and lineage as the donators for this chapter. 

Unless you are attach to them being a Third Founding chapter so could also the Charnel Guard be a good origin for their gene-seed. They were described by Aaron Dembski-Bowden, in an interview, as "The Charnel Guard are the gothic and undead elements of vampirism, amped up to 11. They’re black-armoured, corpse-like, stasis-crypt-using murderers that have countless blood rituals they don’t tell anyone about. The Red Seraphs are the Renaissance and the artistry of Rome in power armour. Their armour is ornate, they try to overcome the Flaw in their gene-seed by amplifying their angelic qualities and focusing on mental and spiritual purity. And the Angels Numinous are the warlike element of mythological angels – they’re the Armies of Heaven that bled and bled and bled as they fought Satan’s Fallen Angels. They wear armour of dark bronze, have a vaguely Persian culture, and sacrifice their Death Company in battle as a blunt instrument, not as honoured brothers but as spiritual failures."

Edited by Gamiel
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  • 2 weeks later...

The Story of the Immortal Brother: (TO BE ADDED LATER) Small Synopsis, somehow the original chapters counciouness is transferred into each new initiated chaptermaster and their old identity "dies' and Kaine takes over.

Minotaurs Chapter Master Asterion Moloc's biography, provides a "somehow". From the Lexicanum article:

Moloc was initially reported as killed in action, but his fleet recovered him alive. This is at least the seventh such incident over the last five centuries, which leads some to believe that "Asterion Moloc" is a legacy inherited by the Chapter Master of the Minotaurs along with his panoply and engrammatically-enforced memories and personality.

Conversation betwen Kaine and Barbal:

Excerpt from the conversation:

These are well-written.

 

Nitpicks, with my emphases:

Chapter Master: (Also known as [carrying lord].) The Immortal Lazarus Kaine.

Wasn't the title "Carrion Lord"? And shouldn't it be capitalized?

The chapter was nearly undone by its own gene[-]seed relatively early in their existence. Brothers within the chapter were rapidly declining into the lack [R]age and the [Red] [T]hirst.

Games Workshop usually spells "gene-seed" with a dash between the words. "Black Rage" and "Red Thirst" should be capitalized. Red Thirst was miswritten as "blood thirst".

The House of the Sanguine ythes

I think you misspelled "Scythes".

The House of the Ravenous Souls (Maintains the [C]hapter[']s Death Whisperers)

Capitalized "Chapter", as is done in Games Workshop publications; added an apostrophe, to indicate possession.

Dante: Why do you deny Astorath the

to give Sanguinius[’] peace to your afflicted brothers[,] Lazarus.

Replaced "rite" with "right"; removed the "s" after the apostrophe, as "Sanguinius" ends with an "s" (contemporary English no longer adds another "s" to indicate possession, in these circumstances); and added a comma.

Kaine: Are we that familiar[,] Dante[,] that you call me by a name my own brothers rarely use[?] Or do you presume your place as [C]hapter [M]aster of the Blood Angels gives you rights and privileges over me[?]

Added commas, capitalized "Chapter Master", and replaced periods with question marks.

Kaine: So now you all proclaim to know the will of our fallen father? No, I do not accept your narrative[,] or Astorath[']s.

Added a comma, and an apostrophe to indicate possession.

Dante: [Y]ou would threaten open conflict and fracture the brotherhood[?]

Capitalized "You", and replaced the period with a question mark.

This fracture led to the Blood Wraiths['] refusal to respond to the lood [A]ngels['] calls to defend Baal.

Added apostrophes to indicate possession, and capitalized "Blood Angels".
Edited by Bjorn Firewalker
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Your Grammatical advice has been noted and changed. As for Lazarus Kaine the Immortal, I am thinking along the line of a "Throne of the Damned" in an ancient Archeotech bunker that the monastery was built over, Lazarus Kaine the Chapter Master regularly returns to that "throne" its basically a tech device and way to copy and update the consciousness it was first linked to, in this case the original Lazarus Kaine and new Chapter masters sit on the throne and their consciousness is overwritten with his. Also thought of making him a perpetual.

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As for Lazarus Kaine the Immortal, I am thinking along the line of a "Throne of the Damned" in an ancient Archeotech bunker that the monastery was built over, Lazarus Kaine the Chapter Master regularly returns to that "throne" its basically a tech device and way to copy and update the consciousness it was first linked to, in this case the original Lazarus Kaine and new Chapter masters sit on the throne and their consciousness is overwritten with his.

It makes sense Lazarus would have the Throne copy his memories, so his successor will know of enemy innovations and be prepared to counter them, e.g., one must close the distance and exploit Tau fire warriors' poor melee combat skills when fighting those xenos, while one must keep a distance and gun down Orks so those xenos cannot bring their great physical strength into play. Instead of saying, "Lazarus' consciousness overwrites that of his successor," say the successor's consciousness is overwhelmed with the memories that "Lazarus" accumulated over millennia of wars, forcing it to conform, e.g., charge TOWARDS a Chaos Sorcerer and attempt to kill the witch before he casts a spell, instead of fleeing in terror like most people.

 

The successors may maintain some of their original traits, e.g., if the Chapter doesn't reserve relic arms and armor for its Carrion Lord (see Asterion Moloc's Black Spear), then one generation's Lazarus might wield a thunder hammer instead of his predecessor's power sword or his successor's lightning claws.

Edited by Bjorn Firewalker
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Some records point to a connection with the ill-fated flesh eaters.

If you are refering the Chapter should it be "Flesh Eaters". Also since the Flesh Eaters survived to the M42 and stayed loyal are they not a good example of a ill-fated Chapter, especially during that early era. You could just name drop a home made Chapter that died out early.

 

The Battle of the Ghaulish gap:

Suggest dating this event

 

The genetic lineage of the people of the planet of Carpathia produces an unusual number of human blanks. While most of these blanks are taken by the inquisitorial Black Ships, The Blood Wraiths have managed over time to figure out a way to hide some of the young male blanks.

Since Blanks are as rare as hen's teeth would an unusuall number of them still mean they are very few, do I suggest that the Chapter have been able to hide all the planets Blanks from the Black Ships, and even that would make the Death Whispers very few (or at least having some notable age intervals) and precious. If you want to you could have them allied with Ordo Opscuros (or some other =][= group) who could be giving them Blanks in echange for being their secret chamber milita

 

The Story of the Immortal Brother: (TO BE ADDED LATER) Small Synopsis, somehow the original chapters counciouness is transferred into each new initiated chaptermaster and their old identity "dies' and Kaine takes over. This isnt set in stone and it just may end up being a name each new chapter master adapts. still in development.

From The Horus Heresy Book Eight: Malevolence

 

"The Immortal Ninth

Time and time again the pride of the IX:th Legion was to fall on the field of battle, yet the records of their valour make common mention of the same handful of warriors and champions. Some remembrancers and historians have taken this to indicate a long history of redoubtable heroes, even going so far as to compile these records into a number of epic stanzas, forming the separate entries into a single legend. Yet, the true reason for the longevity of certain names within the order of battle for the IX:th Legion is far less heroic.

 

Since its foundation, the IX:th Legion had operated in the most extreme battlefield conditions and necessity had forced upon them a number of practises that might otherwise be seen as monstrous. One among these, fostered by the nature of their design and the conditions under which they fought, was the consumption of fallen captains by their followers in order to preserve their hard-won skills and experience. As a mark of honour as well as practicality, it also became accepted that recruits took the names of those whose skills they absorbed, and lieutenants would assume the names of their captains. Such was the resemblance of each member of the IX:th to their flawless brothers that most outsiders failed to notice this subtle brand of immortality. The most famous example of which being the figure thought to have served as the IX:th Legion's first and only master, other than Sanguinius himself. Known to history as Ishidur Ossuros, this warrior is commonly held to have commanded the IX:th from Unity to the discovery of Baal in late M30, yet a closer examination of the records shows that name died numerous times, only to be replaced by another.

 

Over time and battles past count, this practise became an honoured tradition of the Legion, a visceral ritual that bound the survivors together despite their often disparate origins. Yet as much as it bound those of the IX:th Legion to each other, it forced them away from their brethren among the Imperial Army and other Legions. In the years before Sanguinius' return, no few of the other Primarchs expressed a distaste with the practises of the IX:th Legion, though they could not dispute their success on the battlefield. Such was the legacy of mistrust and barbarism that the IX:th carried with them, one pressed upon them by the brutal necessity of their calling."

Edited by Gamiel
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Kaine's story is competently written, though it should've been proofread. My suggested corrections:

Lazarus Kaine order [an] expedition be sent.

Replaced "and" with "an".

Early in the chapters existence circa 491 M. 32 the [tech marines] of the chapter discovered a week but active energy signal deep in the Cantimir Mountains.

Upon arriving the [Tech Marines] found rock debris covering the face of two large doors that appeared to be an entrance to some type of underground bunker. It took the [Tech-marines] weeks to finally excavate the site and manage to open the bunker.

The [Tech-Marines] noticed, from their studies and Mars, that the design of the throne was eerily similar to the [G]olden [T]hrone used by the [E]mperor [H]imself.

You spelled "Techmarine" in several different ways. "Golden Throne" and "Emperor" should be capitalized, as should "He", "Him", "Himself", and "His" when referring to the Emperor, as it is when referring to God in the Bible.

 

Note: The throne can also be compared to the "tutelary engines" referred to in William King's Space Wolves novels, which input advanced technical information into Ragnar Blackmane's brain, via a helmet. I presume other Chapters use it or similar devices to rapidly reeducate death world barbarians, granting them the ability to understand the sciences behind the technology they must use to fight among the stars.

The Tech-Marines explain to Kaine what they saw and gave the only comparison they knew he may understand......The Golden Throne.

This sentence repeats information already given, and should be removed or rewritten.

First: Nobody but the senior [Techmarines], Chief Sanguinary Priest[,] the Chief Librarian, the Chief Chaplain and [h]imself were to know of the chamber and its contents[.]

Rewrote "Tech-Marines" as "Techmarines" (one word), to conform with Games Workshop publications; added a comma; removed the capitalization from "himself" (Kaine is not God or the Emperor, and shouldn't be referred to with such reverence); and removed the word "existence", as it's redundant.

Second: He ordered the [C]hapter[']s fortress[-]monastery would be built [a]top of this bunker[,] and this new monastery [would] become the hub of the [C]hapter[']s operations.

Capitalized "Chapter", as is done in Codices, and added apostrophes to indicate possession; added a dash between "fortress" and "monastery", as is done in Games Workshop publications; rewrote "over top" with "atop"; added a comma; replaced "will" with "would", so the tenses would match.

[King] was more measured.

Who's this "King"? The ancient warlord whose throne it was? Kaine himself (in which case, the sentence should be rewritten as "Kaine became more measured."

glowing red power rapier known as the Vampires Bite

Shouldn't the name be "Vampire's Bite" (note the added apostrophe) or "Vampire Bite" (note the "s" is deemed unnecessary, and removed)?

 

These were found in a quick read that undoubtedly overlooked others.

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@ Gamiel, thank you for your input, i have made a few of the changes and taken some of your advice. The Story of Lazarus Kaine is now up.

Glad to be of help :smile.:

 

 

Homeworld: Carpathia. Carpathia is a Feudal world located deep in the isolated regions of the Scarus Sector of the Halo Stars. The Carpathian system has nine planets with Carpathia being the fifth planet. Carpathia is 70% land mass and only 30% water with most civilizations establishing themselves either near the coast or high in the mountains where there were numerous freshwater tables. The world has rather unremarkable habitat. The winters are longer and harsher than many other imperial worlds especially in the mountainous regions but the people of Carpathia have adapted well to this cold dark world. The Carpathians receive a short reprieve with a 5-month long spring like season. It is during this time when much of the planets agricultural harvests occur. The planet has a 24-month calendar cycle and is in twilight or darkness of 18 of those months. Carpathia has nine moons, 5 of which are inhabited and each of the Houses of the Blood Wraiths maintain a small bastion on each moon and orbital defense capabilities.

Furst of, just want to say that I like Carpathia's description.

 

With nine moons, their nights most be relativly bright.

 

Who/what are the five inhabited moons inhabited by?

 

 

The techmarines noticed, from their studies and Mars, that the design of the throne was eerily similar in size and scale to the Golden Throne used by the Emperor Himself. 

I could be wrong here but I think the Golden Throne was built using mostly none Mars technology, so the techmarines Mars training should not help them with identifying the throne as Golden Throne-ish.

 

The techmarines noticed, from their studies and Mars, that the design of the throne was eerily similar in size and scale to the Golden Throne used by the Emperor Himself. Immediately the techmarines notified Chapter Master Lazarus Kaine of their findings. Without Kaine arrived at the scene and began to discuss with the techmarines what this new found Archeo-tech could possibly be. They explain to Kaine what they saw and gave the only comparisons to a far more advanced version of the tutelary engines used to aid in implanting knowledge into marines as they develop. Kaine immediately ordered them to begin their investigation into the technology and ordered that no communications or discussions on this discovery be held outside of the techmarines conducting the investigation and his own personal advisors. After many long months they were able to access some of the historical data records within the machines operating systems. They noted that it was a cognitive enhancement device used for some form of ancient rite that allowed a person to transfer or share their knowledge and or access the accumulated knowledge within the countless data streams.

I'm feeling we could be dealing with something Dark Glass like here. 

 

This continued until 234 M.33 when the first incarnation of Lazarus Cain fell in battle.

You have spelled his name with a 'k' every where else.

 

Kaine's replacement was selected by the council of nine. Masaccio Moreth from the House of the Dead was the first successor to Kaine selected and as the new Chapter Master, he entered the throne and went through the process.

If you want to show that the Chapter have changed over the millenia I suggest writing something along the line of "Kaine's replacement was selected by the then chapter council. Masaccio Moreth from the company which would became the House of the Dead was the first successor to Kaine selected and as the new Chapter Master, he entered the throne and went through the process." 

 

And thus, was born Lazarus Kaine the Immortal Son.

I can see him having a tendency to talk, even lightly argue, with himself when he thinks nobody is near. Or maybe in relaxed and highly stressful situations. 

 

Unseeing stares into the distance, as he is going through ancient memories not his own could also be something.

 

 Regardless of whom their donator was, the gene-stock the Blood Wraiths received was barely stable and the chapters sanguinary priests constantly struggled to maintain it.

If it was barely stable I don't think it would have been used to creat a new Chapter. Suggest changing to "the gene-stock the Blood Wraiths received quicky degenerated and the chapters sanguinary priests constantly struggled to maintain it."

 

Each new generation of brother was descending into the Black Rage more rapidly.

Suggest changing  "descending into the Flaw more rapidly." since then it could be the Black Rage and/or Red Thirst, instead of just one of them, not locking yourself in. If you really want them do seem unstable could you also mention mutations and/or that the Sanguinary priests had to discard many progenoid glands as unfit. 

 

 

 

Will comment more later.

Edited by Gamiel
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Chapter Master Lazarius Kain, not willing to accept the death and decline of his chapter charged the Chief Sanguinary Priest Amen Barbal to find a solution at any cost.

Maybe ad something about him also believing that the Chapter has some kind of mission/duty/similar because of the information in his head from the throne

 

New Traits and Faults:

Suggest giving them some more problems as to really show that their gene-seed is problematic, even if they have stabliced it now.  Maybe some (mostly?) cosmetic mutations, lighter mental problems, nods to the Night Lords, SM organs that are overactive or not as functional as standard, and/or similar. I have some some BA and LN based mustations if you want some suggestions. 

 

The genetic lineage of the people of the planet of Carpathia produces an unusual number of human blanks. While most of these blanks are taken by the inquisitorial Black Ships, The Blood Wraiths have managed over time to figure out a way to hide some of the young male blanks. An more simplistic approach to this concept would be the chapter never holds onto more then one Blank per assessment. During the Harvests they Identify and hide some of these recruits deep in the crypts of the fortress monastery. This dark secret, without a doubt would be considered an act of heresy by the inquisition. Kaine knows this truth and he and his chapter are committed to hiding both of their dark secrets at all costs. This Dark secret came at a cost. In 348 M. 36 a senior Inquisitorial member of the Ordo Obscurus figured out in part what the Blood Wraiths were doing. He summoned that incarnation of Lazarius Kaine to come before him. Little is know what was said between the Inquisitor and the Carrion Lord but it is certain some dark bargain must have been struck because the chapter was not only allowed to survive and not be censured, they were allowed to continue with their efforts.

Since Blanks are very rare could I see them actually being able to hide away all Blanks from the Black Ships, since the 'Ships don't really expect to find any. Which makes their act oh so more terrible by not just withholding some of the Blanks but all of them.

 

Also, if you ment to refer to "Ordo Opscuros" have your spelling program changing it to "Ordo Obscurus". Suggest give a short presentation about what they do in either case, or if it's Opscuros you mean could you make it a link.

 

 

-------------------

 

If you can come up with any do I suggest adding some events in M40/41 since all our events are from father in the past than the Iron Age is from us. Maybe have them doing something for the Ordo Obscurus/Opscuros. Also the Ordo Opscuros are, at least by wh40k's "now", notorious for their incarnationist agenda, maybe this has effected the Blood Wraiths' belife in some way.

 

Also, if you want to give them more personality do I suggest making some comments about how they look, non-codex nomenclature, and what they do when they have free time/don't train for battle. 

Edited by Gamiel
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By just looking at them, all of the brothers of this chapter have developed solid black eyes and pale, gauntly colored skin. They are far from the near perfect Angelic appearance of the Blood Angels and look more likely a sickly cross between Blood Angels and Nightlords. Their fangs grow to near canine length and  their finger and toenails grow long and rapidly, requiring the marine to constantly trim them. The marines always give off an appearance of being hungry, looking like a starving predator staring at a potential kill.

If I may suggest, instead of "their finger and toenails grow long and rapidly, requiring the marine to constantly trim them" maybe have "their nails grow rapidly, thick and long, turning into claws if not constantly trimmed"; instead of "developed solid black eyes and pale, gauntly colored skin"  maybe "developed solid black eyes and corpselike complexion", or "developed solid black eyes and corpse pale skin with visible veins". 

 

To "The marines always give off an appearance of being hungry, looking like a starving predator staring at a potential kill." maybe ad something about them tasting the air, liking and or showing on their lips.

 

Depending on if you want to go with a more predator/madman theme could you also ad muscle spasms, a tendency to close and open their hand and/or a tendency to stalk non-brethren when not having any orders to stay put. If you want to go with a more corps/undead theme could you have that they are often unnaturally still when not moving, seldom blink, have a coldness about them. Have you read "Tradition’s Last Breath" by ABD in White Dwarf 454? The descriptions given for the Charnel Guard there could be of some real inspiration.

 

 

Still feels a bit... not that problematic for a Chapter with your described history of gene-seed decay.

 

Now, that's just me but maybe ad that only some more problems, and/or something about many of the recruits have to be putdown bacause they begin to mutate, and/or something like the wulfen-curse. If you want to go more psykick/spiritual could you maybe have:

- Sometime fall into a “holy trance” in which they produced stigmata, copying the bane wounds of Sanguinius/Night Hunter.

- Sudden flashes of Night Hunters death, if attacked while receiving the visions the Marine will not make any resistance.

 

 

 

The Horus Heresy Book Eight: Malevolence had some good things in their description of the pre-Sanguinius BA that you migth find interesting: 

(not direct quotes but my reworkings of them for an inspiration list)

- In the wake of victory, the elegant forms of the Chapter's brothers haunt the field of battle, seeking out the finest among the fallen and feasting upon their flesh and blood. This to steal their enemy's power from them, absorbing their knowledge and skill and making it their own.

- Have incorporated the secret bloody rituals of the Chapter into their doctrines of battle, tearing apart the enemy on the field of battle or indulging in bloody feasts to break their morale and set panic in their ranks.

- The Chapter is ever followed by the stench of death and madness.

- The Chapter is home to a strange mixture of Imperial doctrine and crimson ritual, its ranks and formations riddled with charnel cults and bloody prophets of war.

- There is a tradition in the Chapter of the consumption of fallen officers by their followers in order to preserve their hard-won skills and experience. Possibly do the new Marines take the names of those whose skills they absorbed.

- The Chapter’s gore-soaked solitude is the armour of their flickering pride.

 

Kaine: He is the God Emperor and we have not forgotten nor foresworn our oaths unlike you Bile.

Do this mean that the Blood Wraiths worship the Emperor as a god? Unlike the BA?

If yes, could you take some of the more extreme stuff from the Church, or make some of the symbolic stuff non-symbolic. I have not read it myself but if I remember right did the protestant gothic authors really like to give the Catholic church morbid, horrible or strange rituals/ways, if you have the time to do the research, maybe take something from there.

Edited by Gamiel
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