Sons of Horus Posted May 3, 2009 Share Posted May 3, 2009 lol i sense an odd twist to the story now :P although this time a cannot foresee what will happen. hmmm the warp beast part is for comic relief right? ;) Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/164339-the-return-of-the-warmaster/page/8/#findComment-1975155 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Skirax Posted May 3, 2009 Author Share Posted May 3, 2009 Yes I can officialy confirm Abbadon is taking part in Comic Relief 2010, on a sketch show with David Walliams and Matt Lucas. Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/164339-the-return-of-the-warmaster/page/8/#findComment-1975284 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Skirax Posted May 7, 2009 Author Share Posted May 7, 2009 Sorry there haven't been any new updates for a while, couple of problems at home. Will be an update tomorrow though! Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/164339-the-return-of-the-warmaster/page/8/#findComment-1980407 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Skirax Posted May 9, 2009 Author Share Posted May 9, 2009 Great shells hammered into the side of the Cathedral, scattering rockrete and ceramite on the Black Templars in the trenches. Bullets ripped through the air, scattering the falling dust atoms. In the bunker, Grimaldus and Helbrecht considered tactics. 'Be wary, sir, the Guard may have backing from a Chaos Legion, possibly the Word Bearers, as all signs point to these Renegades fighting with religious ferocity,' said Grimaldus, his Crozius slung over his shoulder. 'I agree, though we have had our initial attack stalled because of these Traitors. I think we should launch a counter-attack when their heavy weapons teams begin re-loading.'  Behind the main advancement of the Renegade Militia's tanks, Khârn and Lucius couldn't stop moving. They constantly checked their weapons, whispering to them in hushed tones, and tapping their armour to test the strength of it. The assassin stood in his robes, his weapons dangling around his belt. He couldn't help but laugh, these were the warriors that would assist in the destruction of the Imperium? It was pitiful.  In the trenches, the battle between the Renegades and the Black Templars raged. The Templars cut a swathe through the enemy as they closed with the traitors of Valdorox. The guns of the Marines pumelled the renegades lines into breaking, several units breaking off and falling back. However, two more units took the place of the previous one. Leman Russ' turret weapons disintegrated Marines all around, while high powered bolts blew apart traitor guardsmen. ‘Hold the line!’ called Ferik over the din of battle, ‘the Emperor wishes it to be so!’ With this it seemed the guns themselves tried harder and scores of renegades died in seconds. Bringing his Crozius down on a traitor Psyker, the enemy witch cried out in pain and the symbol of Tzeentch burnt bright on his forehead, before his brain exploded in a shower of gore. From his right a cry came from some two score men, and cries for the Blood God were heard. Gaining the upperhand against these traitors, Ferik counter-charged the berserk renegades, smashing two with his armour as he thundered into them, killing four more with his mighty weapon. The golden double-headed eagle atop an ivory skull gleamed in the light of the planets two suns. ‘For the Emperor, and for Dorn!’ came a battle-cry behind Ferik, and he turned to see five score marines running to join the battle. A dark blue armoured warrior was leading them, a massive blood red fist spread wide, and a venerated Storm Bolter was mounted in his left gauntlet. To the fray came Kantor, leading his defiant and ancient Crimson Fists to battle like the true hero of the Imperium he was. Suddenly a loud crack was heard from the towering Cathedral, and it groaned as 3 more shells hit the walls of the Hall of the Emperor. Another hammered into its walls, and it fell. Just as Helbrecht and Grimaldus came running from their bunker. The first to die was a meaningless servant, but the next was Grimaldus crushed beneath a giant block of rockrete. A cry of pain and anger was heard from the Chaplains lips, before another two blocks fell on him and crushed the life out of him. Helbrecht rushed to assist his brother, but four blocks fell on him before he reached the Chaplains side. The rest of the Cathedral came crashing down on Helbrecht and nearly all of the Black Templars. The rockrete formed a giant mound, crushing the defenders. Seeing the Cathedral fall, Kantor shouted to his brothers. ‘Look men!’ he roared. ‘A hill! Quick, get to the top and commence defence pattern alpha gamma omega! We must not let those traitors recover our brothers’ bodies!’ ‘So we just fire at whatever comes our way, sir?’ cried a Crimson Fist. A stern look came from Kantor in response. Rushing to the peak of the mound, the Crimson Fists unloaded their deadly payload at the enemy. However, just as the Renegade wave began to fall back, two cries were heard amidst the traitors. The first was a ringing sound that penetrated the defensive sensitivities of the Astartes ears. ‘Blood for the Blood King!’ The second was a cry of pure ecstasy, a shout that would turn any mans blood cold. Lucius the Eternal was among their numbers. And that first cry was unmistakable. Before long, a great, red-clad armoured giant slaughtered his way through the retreating traitors. He rushed up the hill, butchering his way through Kantor’s men. Kantor rushed to engage him, and met him toe-to-toe. Khârn brought his mighty chainaxe down on Kantors left shoulder pauldron, the ceramtie torn apart by the chain weapons relentless bite. Eventually blood sprayed through, splattering his helmet red, the blood mixing in with the spilt gore of countless others. Just as he was about to bring his mighty fist down on the traitor, a whistling sound was heard in the air. Kantor looked to the top of the Cathedral, and a bullet ran through the palm of the clenched fist on his helmets forehead. Shocked, he staggered backwards. His fist fell, and the Arrow of Dorn droped from his hand. He fell to the floor, blood pouring from the wound on his head. A cloaked figure stood over him, two blades in his hands. One punctured his chest, and for the lat time, Kantor roard in defiance. However, he had to give in to pain, and he lay there, a dying hero of the Imperium. Before him, his mortality flashed and he saw his true meaning. He saw flashes of the defence of New Rynn City, and the obliteration of the Ork horde on Rynns World. Knowing that his duty was fulfilled, Kantor slowly passed into deaths cold embrace. But one last scene was left in his mind, a picture of a warrior, with his same weapons, clad in black armour, emblems of bone and flames wreathed across his body. Two skulls were on his backpack’s vents, and his eyes burned a crimson red. Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/164339-the-return-of-the-warmaster/page/8/#findComment-1982541 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Simoleo-Brother marine Posted May 9, 2009 Share Posted May 9, 2009 Not bad Skirax, not bad. I think Kantor's death was a little rushed, although I liked the defensive formation joke. And legion of the damned eh? ;) Â Edit: Much better now :) Â -Simoleo Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/164339-the-return-of-the-warmaster/page/8/#findComment-1982543 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tutteman Posted May 9, 2009 Share Posted May 9, 2009 Kantor shouted to his brothers. ‘Look men!’ he roared. ‘A hill! (At this point I smiled in understanding) Quick, get to the top and commence defence pattern alpha gamma omega! We must not let those traitors recover our brothers’ bodies!’ ‘So we just fire at whatever comes our way, sir?’ cried a Crimson Fist. A stern look came from Kantor in response. (Bold bits are me)  Loved that bit :) . Still think a booby trapped hill would have been great but hey. Loved it anyway. Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/164339-the-return-of-the-warmaster/page/8/#findComment-1982550 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hubernator Posted May 9, 2009 Share Posted May 9, 2009 A LotD mercenary? wow what a twist ;) I wonder why... Â Nice new piece, although agreed that it was a tad rushed. Still it's good ::) Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/164339-the-return-of-the-warmaster/page/8/#findComment-1982583 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sons of Horus Posted May 10, 2009 Share Posted May 10, 2009 LotD ;) i am surprised :D Â i couldn't stop laughing at the hill part ;) Â great twist :tu: Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/164339-the-return-of-the-warmaster/page/8/#findComment-1982767 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Skirax Posted May 10, 2009 Author Share Posted May 10, 2009 But wait, there's more...   Khârn paced the top of the hill, Gorechild growling softly. He snarled at the assassin, as he removed the power armour from his cloaked body. Trickery was the last resort, even in Khârn's twisted mind. His plasma pistol was glowing a deep blue, and his green eye lenses were glowing even darker. Lucius was off down the side of a hill, looking over a body of one of the loyalists. He looked away as he began his rituals. Anything for pleasure, thought Khârn, by a Slaanesh worshipper. 'This was not meant to happen,' said the assassin. 'I was meant to kill two people, now I am at a loss.' 'What does it matter? Abbadon just wants them dead.' 'You obviously do not know my true goal. Uhh, foul ignorant...' he trailed off, then his head snapped up. He had realised something. 'I can't claim the life of this hero of the Imperium, but the Gods care not from where the blood comes, right Khârn?' Khârn stood confused for a second, but realisation dawned too late as a blade erupted from his chest. The assasin had jumped behind him and killed him before he knew what was happening. Well, if he was to die, at least it was by a worthy opponent. 'Kudos,' were Kharns last words... Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/164339-the-return-of-the-warmaster/page/8/#findComment-1982953 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hubernator Posted May 10, 2009 Share Posted May 10, 2009 Even better :) Souls for the Dark Gods!! :tu: Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/164339-the-return-of-the-warmaster/page/8/#findComment-1983231 Share on other sites More sharing options...
antique_nova Posted May 11, 2009 Share Posted May 11, 2009 lol if they dont die once by the first method then try try again ^^, the true motto death for grimaldus however, i doubt grimaldus could die from the cathedral collapsing all around him REMEMBER he had an entire hive collapse on him :tu: ( i think ) and he was in the middle of it. Even helbretch could and would survive such a disaster and the force field would save him under the weight of the rocks :wub: and i thought Kantor had already been killed? Loved the part where Karn died i didn't understand what was going on until i read on :P The assassin cant kill one person though. Lucius would be impossible, as we know that the assassin takes delights and pleasures from his kills. Even if a wall falls from him, it will probably be the assassin doings, or worse if its a vindicator ^^ lol would love the assassin to fight Lucius the vindicator tank XD. i think i realise the twist in the next plot. and i think abaddon is in the centre of it or more like in the centre of the warp as a chaos furies as he can't choose his loayalites to either god when his soul leaves his smelly casket :P thanks antique_Nova Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/164339-the-return-of-the-warmaster/page/8/#findComment-1984009 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bluddragonn Posted May 11, 2009 Share Posted May 11, 2009 Awesome new twist to the story! Spelling is much better (i think maybe you used spellchecker? because ceramite is spelled "ceramtie") Â As always I am confused but enthralled! Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/164339-the-return-of-the-warmaster/page/8/#findComment-1984264 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Skirax Posted May 11, 2009 Author Share Posted May 11, 2009 Yes, I now type it up in word. It also drives me too write more as I can't help but think about filling up 5 pages of word with one story... :blink: Â And I delight at your confusement, all shall be revealed, and Antique_Nova, you know the plot! :P Â Edit: spelling. How ironic... Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/164339-the-return-of-the-warmaster/page/8/#findComment-1984293 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Firenze Posted May 11, 2009 Share Posted May 11, 2009 I am half way through killing lucius with a evil death.... sort of. Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/164339-the-return-of-the-warmaster/page/8/#findComment-1984379 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tutteman Posted May 11, 2009 Share Posted May 11, 2009 ... watch out Chaos. No one is safe now :P Â Please, can lucius die of a drug overdose or contaminated drug :P (If you plan to killl him at all) Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/164339-the-return-of-the-warmaster/page/8/#findComment-1984383 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Skirax Posted May 11, 2009 Author Share Posted May 11, 2009 *SPOILER ALERT* Highlight if you want to know... Â Firenze, I told you, you can kill someone in the next series! Please, just hold out! Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/164339-the-return-of-the-warmaster/page/8/#findComment-1984468 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Phitax Posted May 11, 2009 Share Posted May 11, 2009 hehehehehe  kantor's dead, who's next????????  great story loved the hill bit  i'm getting a certain feeling that the assasin might killed a chaos person the way he thinks that there pathetic and stuff  it would be a very interesting plot twist if Khârn was to get a bullet in his head.  and this is coming from a chaos player!!!  yet again great story and keep up the good work :P Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/164339-the-return-of-the-warmaster/page/8/#findComment-1984471 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hubernator Posted May 11, 2009 Share Posted May 11, 2009 There's nothing to highlight Skirax lol Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/164339-the-return-of-the-warmaster/page/8/#findComment-1984472 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Skirax Posted May 11, 2009 Author Share Posted May 11, 2009 Nothing to highlight? Is that good or bad?  @Phitax: Khârn is dead. *facepalms* He killed a Chaos Champion, it's there in black and white. Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/164339-the-return-of-the-warmaster/page/8/#findComment-1984548 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mjolniir Posted May 11, 2009 Share Posted May 11, 2009 you need to do something along the lines of 'terror at 5000 ft' Â '...and as he turned the black robed figure tore the ignition coil from the thunder hawk's engine and soared from the hull. As the mighty astartes warbird fell to the surface of the planet, <named character here> howled with rage...' Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/164339-the-return-of-the-warmaster/page/8/#findComment-1984843 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brother Grius Posted May 12, 2009 Share Posted May 12, 2009 I don't mean to be the naysayer, but I'm not impressed. I read the Calgar story and the Lysander story. There were too many spelling and grammar errors. Two unedited paragraphs isn't enough to satisfy my desire for good literature. (I don't mean to be too harsh, but do at least proofread/spellcheck next time.) Â Edit: Avoiding some of the redundancy would help too. Like using "Imperium" twice in the same sentence. Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/164339-the-return-of-the-warmaster/page/8/#findComment-1985047 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sons of Horus Posted May 12, 2009 Share Posted May 12, 2009 I saw it coming but it was still just as entertaining B) Â lovely story Skirax Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/164339-the-return-of-the-warmaster/page/8/#findComment-1985048 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bluddragonn Posted May 12, 2009 Share Posted May 12, 2009 I don't mean to be the naysayer, but I'm not impressed. I read the Calgar story and the Lysander story. There were too many spelling and grammar errors. Two unedited paragraphs isn't enough to satisfy my desire for good literature. (I don't mean to be too harsh, but do at least proofread/spellcheck next time.)Â Edit: Avoiding some of the redundancy would help too. Like using "Imperium" twice in the same sentence. Â If you read the last one you would know Skirax does now use a spell checker :) Â Oh and I dont get the hill joke, can someone explain? Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/164339-the-return-of-the-warmaster/page/8/#findComment-1985102 Share on other sites More sharing options...
antique_nova Posted May 12, 2009 Share Posted May 12, 2009 the hill joke omega alpha and beta formation They are all code names for the army O = omega A = Alpha B = beta  each code usually refers to a letter or in some cases a plan or even an item. In this case it was a formation, Kantor said three different types of formations. and all the marines knew what they had to do anyway. which was to kill anyone who came close to that hill with the fallen heroes bodies lay. The soilder says to kantor, so we just basically shoot on sight?. The trooper was taking the mick about the unecessary triple formation order that kantor told them to do. hope that clears things up! and skirax I CANT BELIEVE THAT I KNOW THE NEXT PLOT AND the series <_<.] however i think it also involves a god ordering the new death in the series and that we will have a new ( deleted by chaos god tzeench ) the black crusade and that the assassin's true form will be revealed as well as him having a very very major role within the next black crusade ^^> thanks antique_nova Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/164339-the-return-of-the-warmaster/page/8/#findComment-1985394 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Skirax Posted May 12, 2009 Author Share Posted May 12, 2009 Oh, I think I'm ready to reveal the ultimate secret. But, not yet. I will reveal one thing however. Â There will be three seasons, this is the first. Link to comment https://bolterandchainsword.com/topic/164339-the-return-of-the-warmaster/page/8/#findComment-1985510 Share on other sites More sharing options...
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