IA: The Nephilim - Updated 1 Aug 2014

[LongGone]

Revised the Combat Doctrine section to give it a little more depth and put a place holder for the Recruitment section.

I've decided to make their recruitment process similar to the Space Wolves/Imperial Fists. They'll be watching for qualified young tribesmen to distinguish themselves in conflicts and battles, and then scooping them up. The local populace is aware of the chapter, but only as mythic beings who come to take their most promising young warriors. They'll use the insanguination process like the Blood Angels, but instead of using stasis coffins they will use an extended training period to turn the aspirants into initiates.

I've also done work on the beliefs section, but I want to work on it a little more before I put it up here. It will be similar, but I want to tone down the veneration of Sanguinius. They still seek to emulate him, but he's not a saint, just the perfect example of the Emperor's Angel of Death. I want this infatuation (that seems a little strong, but I can't think of a better word) to be a point of contention between the chapter and members of the Ecclesiarchy. Maybe it will even lead to a small skirmish or sumthin... wooo

Also, what do you guys think about the chapter's name? This whole thing came about because of my desire to build and paint Angels of Angelicky Angelness in white power armour... with a dash of 'locate, close with, and destroy the enemy' for good measure. I was hoping to steer clear of the adverb/jective+noun naming convention, but a part of me thinks The Host (as in Angelic Host) is maybe a little too much cheese.

Let me know what you guys think of everything.

LG

[NightrawenII]

Since I have time and means, I will finally properly c&c this article. Btw, I say what I think, offer not mercy, don't waste time on fools and generally help only those who can help themselves.

Origins

"The Host was founded in the early years of M33 as part of the Fourth Founding by the High Lords of Terra.

~

Great Malagantine Purge"

- This is basically the only substantial information in the section. The rest is meaningless since it has no influence on Chapter.

Organization

"Titles within the chapter are a notable departure from the Codex."

- To begin with, the Codex is concerned with fuction over form. Second, why? All of these changes looks to me like change for the sake of change. That's bad.

- Also grey armour in the white Chapter sort of doesn't work.

- Btw, Seraphim, Cherub, Nephilim.

Homeworld

"During the planet's formative years, volcanoes covered much of its surface in ash and obsidian shale."

- During its formative years, Terra was covered in dust, ash and slag. *looks out of the window*

- Also, there is meaning behind the homeworld of Blood Angels.

Combat Doctrine is at odds with itself. Either they are bloodstained killers or pragmatic warriors. Not both at once.

Beliefs

"One of these is the chapter's current High Watcher, Sampson, who was elevated to his present position after being found ministering to his fellow fallen angels."

- I would call him Alimon. It doesn't invoke the mental image of Homer Simpson in Power Armour.

"It is important to note that their beliefs on control and purity have caused them to view heretics and traitors as particularly abhorrent."

- You don't talk about purity before.

What kind of differences would you suggest? I feel like straying too far runs the risk of losing some of the believability. My general theme is Blood Angels in white with a extra dash of angel-ness. Or is that not the case? I'm working on drawing up some notable campaigns and a beliefs section. Is there something else I should add? I'm trying to avoid making them a special snowflake, because that tends to bring out the flamers from the forum.

Well, the 'angelic' Chapters are hard because the theme is already covered by the Blood Angels(yang) and Dark Angels(yin)*. I would suggest this; the original greek word angelos (malach in Hebrew) means messenger/envoy, so I would model the Chapter as messengers/heralds (of Emperor). What message they bring and to whom is entirely up to you.

*

Blood Angels and Dark Angels- There are two types of popularized angels archetypes. The Guardian Angel and the Angels of Death. The Blood Angels are the guardian angels of the Imperium, descending on wings of light where they can help the most and do the most good. They are noble and proud, beautiful in their conduct and appearance. People want the Blood Angels to come help them. Their Primarch was universally loved and is held as the greatest of the Primarchs. They see themselves as Angels, like their Primarch, and act that way.

The I Legion is
the yin to the Blood Angels 'Angelic' yang. They are not the ones you want to come help you. They are the wrathful angels descended to bring God's judgment down upon sinful populations. If the Dark Angels have become involved in what you were trying to do, you have made a mistake somewhere, and now they have come to solve your problems for you. You didn't want them too, but you were too incompetent to get it done, so here they are. Lion El'Johnson was a cold, unfeeling warrior. The consummate strategist, unburdened by conscience (or however A D-B put it). He was not a hero, and his sons are not heroes, they are instruments of wrath. They conduct themselves as a knightly order, and hold knightly traditions.

~ NightrawenII

[LongGone]

Since I have time and means, I will finally properly c&c this article. Btw, I say what I think, offer not mercy, don't waste time on fools and generally help only those who can help themselves.

Thank you. Both for the in depth critique and that lil' nugget of a pseudo-compliment.

As I'm apparently MultiQuote deficient, I'm just going to respond/answer the rest of your points below:

-Origins

I definitely agree that this section needs to be fleshed out a little bit. I've seen several IA's though that turn this section into a small novella, or create a wall of text on an event that, while meaningful to the chapter's formation, doesn't require a play by play for a reader to understand. The draft above is me erring on the side of 'less is more.' My big question is how in depth is appropriate? How many battles does one need to go over? Or is it that I should just get rid of everything but the founding info and the purge?

-Organization

I understand where you're coming from, but I don't necessarily agree that a change in honorific ranks and titles needs an explanation. Many Codex-compliant chapters have different titles (the Excoriators and Executioners for example) with little explanation for that fact.

Why don't you think gray works as a color to set apart the chapter's 'lost' Marines? Is there a color you would suggest? Is black the only option for a DC analog?

Homeworld

Noted. I'll take out the 'formative' and just say that it's a volcanic planet, wracked with eruptions, lava, and ash wastes as far as the eye can see. I don't quite follow what you mean with Baal has meaning? Do you mean the word Baal itself, or as a symbol for the chapter? Could you explain that further?

Combat Doctrine

Here I wanted to convey the image of the chapter keeping their bloodlust in check. They are big on having control over the flaw of their geneseed, and using it to their advantage. They're not Khornate berzerkers or Black Templars, rushing headlong into enemy fire to cross blades with the enemy. But when they do come to grips with the enemy, they are a fearsome sight to behold. They aren't a sledgehammer (smashing everything to pieces), or a scalpel (extremely specialized tool suited to a limited range of situations), but a katana... or something else in between If I emphasize the control piece, do you think it would work better? Or should I choose one or the other?

Beliefs

Alimon? I wasn't really sold on Sampson either, but I'm missing the reference/reason for Alimon.

I'll change out purity for nobility, although I could have sworn I mentioned purity of thought/mind somewhere earlier in the article.

I like your messenger theme. I've been looking for something to take them beyond just angels+angels+angely goodness. I'm open to any other suggestions you have to set them apart. I want them to have the nobilty and savage beauty of their Primarch, and use their religious demeanor to help explain their control of the flaws of their geneseed, the hidden monster just waiting to come out. I definitely don't want them to be successors to the I Legion though. If you, or any of the brothers/sisters on the forum, have ideas for how I can more clearly articulate that, I'm all ears.

Thanks for the C&C!

LG

[NightrawenII]

-Origins

I definitely agree that this section needs to be fleshed out a little bit. I've seen several IA's though that turn this section into a small novella, or create a wall of text on an event that, while meaningful to the chapter's formation, doesn't require a play by play for a reader to understand. The draft above is me erring on the side of 'less is more.' My big question is how in depth is appropriate? How many battles does one need to go over? Or is it that I should just get rid of everything but the founding info and the purge?

Er, no, no and no.

The origin section is the first trap-hole new DIYer encounters. Keep in mind, the IA articles were devised for 1st Founding Legions, thus the origins served as introduction of Primarch and account of their deeds in Great Crusade, Horus Heresy and in some cases the Scouring. DIYers, who are familiar with these articles, are often under impression they have to introduce some cataclysmic event early in the Chapter's history to match the originals. You don't have to at all. The origins are here to introduce your Chapter and sort of explain how the Chapter (character) was born. See Index Astartes: Storm Stalkers for good example.

-Organization

I understand where you're coming from, but I don't necessarily agree that a change in honorific ranks and titles needs an explanation. Many Codex-compliant chapters have different titles (the Excoriators and Executioners for example) with little explanation for that fact

The Chaplain in the Executioners Chapter has slightly different role than normal Chaplain. The same can be said about the Excoriators since they are affected by the genetic curse. There is no (apparent) change in role, function or responsibility from the standard in your Chapter.

Why don't you think gray works as a color to set apart the chapter's 'lost' Marines? Is there a color you would suggest? Is black the only option for a DC analog?

Because mainstream colour of the Chapter is white. Any dark colour would be fine.

Homeworld

Noted. I'll take out the 'formative' and just say that it's a volcanic planet, wracked with eruptions, lava, and ash wastes as far as the eye can see. I don't quite follow what you mean with Baal has meaning? Do you mean the word Baal itself, or as a symbol for the chapter? Could you explain that further?

The BA aspirants ascend from the living-hell to heavens, to be changed from human caricatures to beings of unnatural beauty and nobility; in a way the BA marines are transcendent beings.

Combat Doctrine

Here I wanted to convey the image of the chapter keeping their bloodlust in check. They are big on having control over the flaw of their geneseed, and using it to their advantage. They're not Khornate berzerkers or Black Templars, rushing headlong into enemy fire to cross blades with the enemy. But when they do come to grips with the enemy, they are a fearsome sight to behold. They aren't a sledgehammer (smashing everything to pieces), or a scalpel (extremely specialized tool suited to a limited range of situations), but a katana... or something else in between If I emphasize the control piece, do you think it would work better? Or should I choose one or the other?

I understand what you want to say. Place less emphasis on close combat, the way it's right now makes the notion of restraint and self-control out of place.

Beliefs

Alimon? I wasn't really sold on Sampson either, but I'm missing the reference/reason for Alimon.

Alimon the angel protects against all sorts of wounds / Alimon the chaplain keeps the Black Rage at bay.

~ NightrawenII

[Lord-Captain Cepinari]

Homer Simpson? Really? The image I'm getting is of a certain 'Swedish Murder Machine' wearing blood-stained power armor.

 

Heh, maybe he's Deathwatch and Rusty's his Inquisitor. I haven't seen a crossover with this kind of comedic potential since someone mixed Ciaphas Cain with Blackadder.

[LongGone]

Lord-Captain Cepinari, on 25 Dec 2013 - 06:43, said:

Homer Simpson? Really? The image I'm getting is of a certain 'Swedish Murder Machine' wearing blood-stained power armor.

Heh, maybe he's Deathwatch and Rusty's his Inquisitor. I haven't seen a crossover with this kind of comedic potential since someone mixed Ciaphas Cain with Blackadder.

I had intended to write some fluff describing Sampson's glorious blonde locks and his love for an ancient Terran band named for a metallic, floating transportation vehicle...

I kid, I kid. No, but seriously...

Anyways, I've been giving this IA a lot of thought the last few hours or so. Part of me is thinking I should go back and rethink the theme of my chapter, that 'Angels+Angel things=Angelic Goodness" is hard to build on in a way that separates them from BA, but doesn't make them special snowflakes or different for the sole reason of 'because I say so.' I would keep some of what I have so far as a foundation to build on, but the chapter would be taken in a less angelic direction.

I'll put my starting bullet points below. Let me know what you think, and if I should stay the course with The Host or go with this new unnamed chapter.

- Geneseed: Blood Angel

- Believe their genetic flaws (Red Thirst/Black Rage) can be controlled and used to their advantage (bolster their strength/prowess in close combat)

- Believe the 'cleansing' power of fire/pain can bring the clarity of mind and purity of spirit needed to control the flaw

- Engage in branding/fire rituals, both as honor markings and as part of a spiritual cleanse

- Beliefs as a chapter are heavily influenced by the creed of their volcanic homeworld (Dominion from the original IA)

- Though they view themselves as savage and brutish, they aspire to reach the level of nobility and grace they attribute to their Primarch

Anyways, I'm just spitballing here. Let me know what you guys think.

LG

[Quixus]

- Believe the 'cleansing' power of fire/pain can bring the clarity of mind and purity of spirit needed to control the flaw

- Engage in branding/fire rituals, both as honor markings and as part of a spiritual cleanse

- Beliefs as a chapter are heavily influenced by the creed of their volcanic homeworld (Dominion from the original IA)

Reminds me of Nick Kyme's Salamanders.

[LongGone]

Yeah... I kinda figured that would be the response to the branding thing. I was hoping the 'control the flaw' part would be enough to give me some wiggle room. My other thought was to have the chapter use gladiator pits, with the idea that they constant fighting/pain give their minds something to focus on, leading to control of the flaw. Basically I want to replace the 'artistic' side of many of the sons of Sanguinius (there's a couple of scenes in Death of Integrity that illustrate this very well) with something more feral. I figured volcanic world = flames and lots of heat = LETS JUST BURN EM!!!! 

 

Plus, this would give the chapter a stronger tie to their homeworld and show how it has influenced them! 

[Quixus]

Fire and its ritual significance is pretty much a Salamander thing AFAIK, but I don't think that another chapter shouldn't have something similar.

The gladiator pits and infliction of physical pain as a distraction from their emotional pain, is an interesting idea. While other chapters have gladiator pits and intra chapter sparring that from time to time gets out of hand, they do it for different reasons.

[Lord-Captain Cepinari]

Pain, huh?  That's kind of already the Imperial Fists' thing.  I'm not saying you can't do it, just letting you know so you don't make it too similar.

 

According to Lexicanum, IF Initiates who make it to actual Scout status celebrate by having their Chapter's logo imprinted on their butts.  Not really relevant to the topic, I just felt like mentioning it because it stood out in the article.  Seriously, that little fact just comes right the *bleep* out of nowhere, and then you just sit there thinking "Did I really just read that?"

[LongGone]

Just to make sure I understand, the general consensus is to move forward correct? With the caveat that I need to clearly delineate the chapter from others who have the same/similar practices? I think that can be accomplished.

Haha, so they get the Fist branded on their heiny huh? I had to look that up just to see it for myself! I wonder why that wasn't covered in Sons of Dorn?

This next part is slightly off topic, but the good Lord-Captain mentioned the Lexicanum. On my many adventures into the Lexicanum and the 40k Wiki, I've often found the articles on the Wiki to be a little more in depth. Sometimes horribly formatted, and grammatically caddywhompus, but they usually seem to have more information. Is there a source considered by the community to be better than the other/s? Beyond having every GeeDub and Black Library publication in my library, I mean.

[Gorkimedes]

I've always heard that lexicanum is usually more accurate and less prone to fanfic being passed as official background.

[LongGone]

So I did a little bit of work on the Origins section of the new chapter. This is supposed to follow the piece concerning the Great Malagantine Purge. After reading about the Angels Penitent chapter, I was intrigued by the idea of a chapter transformation. I didn't want them to turn into zealous puritans like the Penitents though, I wanted them to experience a serious fall from grace. I thought that would set the stage very nicely for them using pain to control the flaw. Here it goes:

 

"...The chapter emerged from the campaign fundamentally changed. Where they were once open and unguarded with their allies, they were now taciturn and grim. Rumor has it that a record number of Astartes succumbed to the genetic flaw inherited by all the sons of Sanguinius. Paragons of nobility had descended to the level of bloodthirsty savages during two decades of brutal warfare. Despite being award a homeworld by the Lords of Terra for their part in the campaign, what should have been a distinguished period turned into a black stain on the chapter's history.

 

While not physically defeated, the chapter was spiritually broken. Despite their high intentions, they had fallen far short of being the exemplars they had thought themselves to be. Their heads hung in shame, the Heralds set out for their new world on the edge of the Segmentum Tempestus. 

It would be over 300 years before the chapter once again appeared in the records of the Imperium. Only what rose from the volcanic wastelands of their homeward bore scant resemblance to the Heralds of Light.

They were the XXXXXXX XXXXXX."

 

Let me know what you guys think! 

 

LG

[Lord-Captain Cepinari]

"They were the BLANKETY BLANK."

 

It's missing something.

[LongGone]

Yeah... probably should have explained that with the new direction, the chapter is also (most likely) getting a new name. I'm just waiting for something with enough *Grimdark* to come to mind. Much to my chagrin, the Imperial Harbingers are commonly referred to as just the Harbingers. I thought that would play nicely off NightrawenII's messenger/herald idea. I'm not too worried about it at the moment, as I have read in other threads that it is sometimes better to create the name after you lay the foundation for your chapter, as this will help you fit the name to the fluff instead of vice versa.

 

All that is to say that I'm still looking for name ideas, so if anyone has an idea they'd be willing to share...

[Darrell]

As a general rule, names can be among the last things you do. A "working name" is always helpful, as referring to your Chapter as "Chapter" or "Chapter X" or similar nomenclature can be tedious. "The Host" is fine for a name, both for a finished product and a placeholder. Often, the name tends to reflect on the Chapter in some way but, like the names of people, their meaning can be broadly applied to pretty much anything. A Chapter called "Emperor's Ravens" could embrace the concept of Raven as a symbol of death, a carrion scavenger, a keeper of secrets, a silent watcher, or a symbol of cunning. Much like how you can look up the meaning of someone's name and find a way to apply it to them, despite the fact they were named far before they had a fully developed personality. My recommendation is almost always to focus on the foundation of the Chapter's concepts, and I believe it applies well here.

 

Reading through the IA, it feels bland to me. I don't really get a feel of any sort of concept or theme, except "We're a lot like Blood Angels". I understand a sort of theme of "angelic" but it seems to be presence in name only. The Chapter doesn't feel angelic. It feels generic. While you don't want to bash the reader over the head with a theme (Like saying your Space Angels ride Thunder Angels and wield Angel Claws that were forged by Angel Priests who wear Angel Talismans that come from the planet Angelus), it's important for the theme to be present throughout. Between taking a theme too far and not taking it far enough, I would rather see the former. It will at least give the reader an idea of what you want to do and a general direction you want to go, and they can advise accordingly. If I hadn't read through the entire thread, I wouldn't have even gotten the whole "angels of angelicness" idea. Right now, it just feels like a template for any number of Blood Angel successors. But, that's okay. No idea starts off perfect.

 

Before you start thinking of Chapter beliefs, organization, tactics, et cetera, you need to focus on your theme. What do you want this Chapter to be about? What gave you the inspiration to want to try your hand at writing an IA? Write that down, then break it down. Say you want to do a Chapter about angels. Write down exactly what aspects of angels you find most interesting, in terms of creating a Chapter. Write as many things as you can come up with, but no more than ten. You want to boil it down to what's important to you, and eliminate the rest. Once that is done, cut it down. If you wrote ten, choose five of the most important. If you wrote less, you want to narrow it down by about half. Then prioritize them in order of importance. This will help you understand your theme and point you in the right direction. Any direction is better than none; you can always turn around and come back, or veer off accordingly.

 

As the ideas come to you, take some time to digest them and mull them over. Try to look at them from different angles, preferably from as unbiased a perspective as you can manage (Though this is difficult to do, as we are all susceptible to bias. This is especially true when it comes to our own creations). When writing about your Chapter, always ask "Why?". Why do they believe this way? Why are they on they based on this planet and not another? Why do they fight like they do? And when you answer those, ask "Why?" again. Having to justify your ideas solidifies the concept and helps to guide you along. You don't necessarily need to answer all those questions in the IA, though obviously you want to answer as many important ones as you can and space allows, but you, as the author, should know the answers. Once you've considered the ideas, feel free to post them and ask for feedback. You can do this by editing in the IA and letting people know it has changed, or as an individual reply if you want feedback on that idea specifically.

 

Finally, an idea:

 

If you want to do something along the lines of "angels" and want to touch on an idea of "falling from grace" or "falling short of their ideals", perhaps the Chapter had another homeworld. A peaceful, tranquil place amidst a galaxy of war and bloodshed. They wanted to recruit from a populace who had known peace, who would know what it was the Astartes were fighting for, even if it meant they would never know peace again for themselves. There was no senseless killing among the humans, though perhaps they had to defend themselves from predators. People had what they needed, and did not take more than what they had earned. It was an isolated world, and the Astartes quietly stayed out of their way so as not to spoil their innocence. They quietly took their recruits from the populace, perhaps creeping through villages while the people slept or snatching away lone hunters. The Astartes hated to do it, to take these people away from their peaceful existence and cast them into a galaxy of endless warfare, but it had to be done. For years, this went on, until one day they were exposed. Perhaps a guard rang an alarm when they saw a shape creeping through streets, or other hunters stumbled upon a kidnapping. Suddenly, paranoia spreads. Who are these strangers? What are they? Are they from another village? Has another settlement been sneaking into their lands and stealing their people? Accusations fly. The Astartes keep their heads down, hoping the situation will blow over. No such luck. The world is on the verge of tearing itself apart as tales upon tales of lost family members are shared. The Astartes finally intervene at a council of leaders. They reluctantly explain who they are, what they are and their purpose. They share the story of the Imperium, the Emperor, the Space Marines. They confess to taking people away, and maybe some of those Space Marines take off their helmets to look into the eyes of old family members. But their eyes are different. The innocence has been burned from them, and replaced with something else.

 

The people seem calm, and the situation seems to defuse. But, the angels have torn the veil from their eyes. Now, they want to see this 'Imperium' for themselves. Maybe some just want to see their family again. They start trying to prove themselves worthy of being taken to the Far Away Place. Young people are more worried about learning to fight than they are about learning to farm and trade. The angels don't see it happen. Maybe they were called away to another part of the galaxy, and are kept away for years. When they return, the planet has collapsed. People are murdering, stealing, rampaging through villages just so maybe they'll be chosen. Perhaps Chaos has finally found its way into the hearts and minds of the population--the seed planted by those who most wanted to protect the planet. The angels try to fix the situation, but everything they do just makes it worse. Every appearance only feeds the fever. During one meeting, blood is shed. No one is sure who struck first, but at the end there are bodies broken and the Astartes have claimed lives for the first time on the planet. Some of the people see this as the angels culling the unworthy. Some see this as the angels no longer being worthy of their worship. There are others.

 

It spirals out of control. In less than a decade, a peaceful paradise world has descended into madmen. The angels have no choice. They cull the planet, but not by Exterminatus. The Astartes know full well this is their own fault, and they take to the planet in force with bolter and blade. The roar of the boltgun is a reminder of their failure. They must take the lives of those they have failed, just as they had taken the planet's innocence. It takes a long time. Some of the populace meets them in open combat, some run and hide. The Astartes find cave paintings of terrible avenging angels, drawn over beautiful pictographs from years before. But, they all die. Fighting, screaming, running, crying, begging... they all die. The angels pack up and exit the system, because there is nothing left for them. But, part of them will never truly leave the planet. The Chapter is tight-lipped about what happened. Records are conveniently misplaced or deleted. A statue of Sanguinius sheds a single tear of blood when the planet Innocence is recategorized from a paradise world to a dead world. It changes the Chapter. None of them are ever the same.

[LongGone]

Not gonna lie, after reading some of your posts in other threads here in the Liber (especially the Scarlet Crusade one), I was kinda hoping you would take a look at my chapter's IA. 

 

"I understand a sort of theme of "angelic" but it seems to be presence in name only. The Chapter doesn't feel angelic. It feels generic."

 

That's basically why I decided to take my chapter in a new direction. I realized I was beating readers about the head and neck with angelic names, but beyond that, didn't have a reason for it. There was no answer to the question 'Why?' beyond 'Because I say so...' As far as the inspiration or impetus for this IA, I'm making a return to the hobby after about 5-6 years. I had chosen BA dex and the general color scheme, but wanted to take a stab at making my chapter an 'official' part of the 40k universe. Enter my first Index Astartes article. 

 

Like you said, it seemed my biggest issue was the chapter didn't really differentiate themselves from the Blood Angels beyond the names. For the rewrite, I wanted one of the main themes to be a fall from grace. Its not entirely original for BA successors, but it's not necessarily overdone either. I also wanted the chapter to be resolved to control and use their genetic flaw to their advantage, vice cure it (most of the sons of Sanguinius) or wholly give in to it (Flesh Tearers, kinda).

 

 "Write down exactly what aspects of angels you find most interesting, in terms of creating a Chapter..."

 

I attempted to do that after reading your aforementioned post in the Scarlet Crusaders thread. I'll give it another go below, but I've decided to drop the heavy handed angel references:

 

- Fall from grace
- Believe their genetic flaws (Red Thirst/Black Rage) can be controlled, vice seeking a cure
- Utilize pain to focus/purify their minds, vice artistic endeavors used by most BA (toyed with the idea of brands/near-continuous fights in gladiator pits)
- New beliefs as a chapter are heavily influenced by the creed of their volcanic homeworld (Dominion from the original IA)
- Though they view themselves as savage and brutish, they aspire to reach the level of nobility and grace they attribute to their Primarch

 

What do you think?

 

I do like your idea of the fall from grace coming as they cleanse their once peaceful homeworld. The idea I was working with here on my desktop was the fall coming as the result of a particularly nasty and grueling campaign, the Malagantine Purge. Prior to this, the chapter had been an echo of the Blood Angels' beauty and grace, compassionate toward the common man, and friendly toward the Ministorum (officially created a little before the chapter's founding). According to the fluff, the Purge was a 21-year campaign of violent excess (my interpretation) that saw an entire sector cleansed of life. I think it could have the same impact as what you suggested. Thoughts?

 

For the rewrite, I've been using the thread instead of the initial post to air my ideas. In the future, should I make edits to the initial post? I guess it would be easier for new readers...

 

Thanks for the C&C!

 

LG

[Lord-Captain Cepinari]

A whole sector would be a bit much. A pretty good rule of thumb I've picked up in my (admittedly short) time here is that you don't want your fluff to contain anything so big that it should have been mentioned in official works.

[LongGone]

Good sir, I too have learned the same lesson. I would direct you to IA:Volume 9...or just search for Great Malagantine Purge in the Lexicanum. Five chapters, two of which are unnamed, were tasked with "sparing none", and "setting a bloody example" whilst waging war on the heretical Malagant Sector.

 

BAM! Perfect fall material for my chapter :)

[LongGone]

I updated the Origins section to reflect the new direction of my chapter, now called the Nephilim. Did you know that while 'Fallen Angels' is the usual translation for Nephilim, it's also been translated/interpreted as 'the violent ones' and 'ones falling upon their enemies?' Thought that was pretty fitting. Let me know what you think. 

 

I'm working on the other sections as well, but will hold off on posting those until I get each of them finished. Please forgive the continuity breaks between all the sections. 

 

The direction I'm going, as I've said in a few of the earlier posts, is to take a Blood Angels successor through a fall from grace. I'm hoping this will be something a little different compared to some of the other BA successors done in the Liber.  

[Prefect Apollyon]

They are also the giant cannibal offspring of fallen angels and human women.

 

And in 40K, were a race during the Horus Heresy that dominated human populations. Horus told Sanguinius they had survived their purge to get him to go to Signus Prime.

 

I'll give it a read and give my opinion.

 

EDIT: Much better! Grimdark too, I like it! Just need to get on with updating the rest of the IA to be in line with the update.

[LongGone]

Oh yeah, totally forgot about the opening scene of Fear to Tread.

[Lord-Captain Cepinari]

Um, Exqueeze me, but:

 

http://wh40k.lexicanum.com/wiki/Nephilim_%28disambiguation%29#.UsItxvbslZw

[LongGone]

Um, Exqueeze me, but:

 

http://wh40k.lexicanum.com/wiki/Nephilim_%28disambiguation%29#.UsItxvbslZw

 

Lord-Captain Cepinari I understand what you're getting at, but I don't really see an issue with it. Do other things have the word Nephilim in their name? Yes, undoubtedly so. But the key is that my search-fu has yet to reveal a chapter or Chaos war band with that name, or that even word in any part of their name. 

 

The same issue comes up with things like 'Omega,'Orpheus,' 'Hounds' and a wide plethora of words. If the word association is a huge sticking point, and it just won't work for you and other members of the forum, then I can be persuaded to look for a new name. However, I think the name, and multiple interpretations associated with it (see my second to last post), are very fitting for the theme of the chapter. I have other ideas for names, but in my mind they focus on secondary attributes/themes of the chapter.

[The Nephilim]

I wasn't aware I had a loyalist chapter.