XIth: Wardens of Light - Destined to be forgotten

[MikhalLeNoir]

I looked it up on youtube. wow, as it bears similarites like the backstabbing from those "imperial"(?)soldiers, those guys getting killed were alone. are they a single man army? we talk here about whole companies or fleets who get backstabbed. so it is very similar, but on a much greater scale. were the backstabbed could at least fight back...sort of^^

 

Well I saw episode 1 and the duel vs blackguy vs shovel face and his pupil was really awesome...the rest...c'mon a boy who is destroying a battlestation where others fail? than this vile xenos....naaaaahhh, i never even thought about watching the others, as the first one ruined the whole experience for me.

Edited October 22, 2015 by MikhalLeNoir

[MikhalLeNoir]

so a little update:

 

For the liber challenge, I wanted to create the 53rd company/circle of the Wardens of Light. Right now, they are on a campaign with the Blood Angels.

The Wardens use Crossfire tactics to surround their foes and the fastest way to get behind enemy lines is with a jetbike, so as I throw all my money to the concept artists on deviant art, I had to look for cheap prices on ebay.

I got one in the process and was very happy to start with, but when I opened the package I realized, that I was tricked :-(

 

The end part was missing....Gnah. So after I bombed the seller via email and saw that he tricked me with his item description ( what you see is what you get...BASTARD!!!!) i had to think. AlphariusOmegon suggested (thx mate) to use a bike and I had one lyiing around from my fallen. then some spare parts from max mini and this is now in the works:

 

 

thx to greystuff and my hobbyknife(damn, couldn't find my saw) I was able to fit it together.

 

next step will be cables and wires.

 

what do you say?

 

As the bike is special, it will be used by the captain/ Warden-Constable (Consul) he will be terranborn and is no blank, but could fild a big big sword with whom he attacks in mid flight.

 

Command&Conquer welcomed as always

 

[Khornestar]

Coolest. Jetbike. Ever. Looks very "of Chaos" to me, but perhaps that's part of your fluff or whatnot. Haven't read too much into your background stuff.

Edited October 24, 2015 by Venomlust

[MikhalLeNoir]

It is a chaosbike cause i hadn't other bits at hand. I try to bring it more to the light. Maybe add more eagly and suns or something like that.

 

 

And thx for the kind words. Was really shocked with only half a bike so if it looks good, it was a success.

 

Read the background;) or at least watch the artworks. They are cool ;)

[MikhalLeNoir]

Here the ranks of The Wardens of Light: (from top to lower ranks)

Primarch
First Warden(Praetor Rank)
Blade Master(Duelist (no command rank)

Lord of Light ( Highest Command Rank except for the first Warden)
Chamberlain of Light (Legion Master Rank)
Master of the Fortress ( Responsible for the creation and preparation of new Wardens)
Bearer of Light ( Chapter Master Rank)
Disciple Of Light ( Captain Rank )
Senior Warden of Light (Veteran)
Warden of Light ( standard marine)
Child of Light( Scouts/ new Wardens)

 

Apothecary and Techmarine Ranks will come with an update. maybe someone has an idea for the techmarines?

 

A, and concerning fleet master: the chamberlains and the bearers of light are all fleet masters. the navigator would be just master navigator, senior navigator, navigator and noob^^

Edited August 8, 2016 by MikhalLeNoir

[MikhalLeNoir]

The madness goes on:

 

Some more work in progress pics from my jetbike conversion. Now we have a crazy rider too.

 

 

 

Thx to bees sculpting tool i was able to make easy wired cables. man, in the past i modeled them per hand.....

 

So, any C&C?

I try to make him less chaosy, I will add purity seals and long cloth scarves in the next step so that they fit into the image of the other wardens. Any other suggestions?

 

[Kelborn]

Seems solid.

 

What about Techmarines and Apothecarii?

 

Will there be additional titles like master of the fleet or some unique stuff like for example the Night Lords have?

[MikhalLeNoir]

Thy will stay slightly out of the normal ranks. like the blademaster, they will have ranks themselves, bsp: healer of light, or in the case of techmarines i will orientate myself on the other legions, cause a techmarine has close connections to mars, so ii habve to check it first.

 

 

Ah and here a litte WiP to show the Disciple of Light of the 53rd Company

 

Edited October 25, 2015 by MikhalLeNoir

[Sigismund229]

Looks awesome keep it going!

[marine7312000]

I really think you should put a cloak on him. For no reason other than rule of cool. Model looks pretty good. I'm glad the ebay issue is somewhat resolved.

[MikhalLeNoir]

Your wish will be fullfilled.

 

The Rule of Cool^^

 

http://images.dakkadakka.com/gallery/2015/10/26/753403_sm-.jpg

 

http://images.dakkadakka.com/gallery/2015/10/26/753404_sm-53rd%20Company%20Disciple%20of%20Light%28Captain%29.jpg

 

And? You like it?

Edited October 26, 2015 by MikhalLeNoir

[AlphariusOmegon108]

*drool*

[Sigismund229]

*tries not to cry at the awesomness*

[MikhalLeNoir]

Thx mates:)

[Thousand Eyes]

Get some colour on that fella ASAP. Can't wait to see how he is done.

 

I am really hoping he will be leaning to one side like that when the flying base is attached and all.

[MikhalLeNoir]

Get some colour on that fella ASAP. Can't wait to see how he is done.

 

I am really hoping he will be leaning to one side like that when the flying base is attached and all.

Hah. I am not the fastest painter nut i will try my best.:)

 

 

And yes, he will lean inside so he can swing his sword at full speed into hos enemy ;)

[MikhalLeNoir]

Here are the legion astartes for the Wardens of Light.

 

They are 90% final, what is actually missing is the revamp of the Pariah rules for standard marines, as we are still working on them in the unified pariah thread.

 

Thx to AlphariusOmegon108, Slipsstreams and Grifftofer for their help and effort.

 

 

LA: Wardens of Light (WoL)

The flight of light: Units with the LA(WoL) and jump unit specifications gain the hit&run special rule

The burning light: Heavy weapon squad and support squad units equiped with a weapon with the "heavy" or "Salvo" special rule may choose to take one of the following special rules for the rest of the game for no additional cost: Pinning, shred or twin linked. This rule must be the same for all models with a heavy weapon in the same unit.

Perfected assault: Units with the jump unit specification may re-roll one dice from a charge roll if another unit with the LA(WoL) shot at the same unit.

The Wardens: A main detachment of (WoL) may not take more tanks then infantry (of all types) in an army. Also no fortifications may be taken.

Legion of blanks and pariah's: No psykers of any kind may be used in a primary detachment of WoL additionally, any LA(WoL) Squad/unit may purchase the soul of light for 15 points per unit or 10 points per character A unit/model with this upgrade gain the adamantium will special rule. A model with the "character" specification may take the Pariah (Tertiair) rule for 20 points. If the character is a independent character, he may be further upgraded to a Pariah (Secundus) for an additional 20pts, and to a Pariah (Prime) for another 20 pts

warding: enemy models count as having -1I when fighting a model/unit equiped with weapons with this special rule.

 

Terminators can only be taken a terran marine is leader if the army. Never if leader is from caerbannog and a pariah. If the army leader is the primarch himself, Gwalchavad, then this rule is not active, as a primarch wouldn't limit himself.

 

Legion specific wargear:

Chain tonfa's: R- S: user ap5 warding, when two handed add +1A in profile Power tonfa's: R- S: user Ap3 warding, rending, when two handed add +1A in profile

Dual Sabre: R- S: user Ap3 duelist edge, rending (5+), warding,+1A, may not shoot any weapons, two handed warding: enemy models count as having -1I when fighting a model/unit equiped with weapons with this special rule.

Hidden Blade: A model equipped with a hidden blade may make an additional single attack per turn as well as any they would normally be eligible to make. This is done using the weapon profile shown below:

Range S AP Rules Hidden Blade - User -1 - Melee, Unexpected Strike

Unexpected Strike: This attack comes from an unexpected angle leaving opponents little chance to defend themselves. When rolling to hit for attacks with this special rule the target counts as having -1WS (to a minimum of 1).

 

All troop units may buy a chain tonfa for +1 points per model or a paired chain tonfa (replaces the main weapon where appropiate) for +3 points per model.

All models in the same unit must take this upgrade A model eligable to take power swords may instead take a power tonfa for 15 pts per model or a paired power tonfa for 25 pts Models with the "Character" special rule may take a dual sabre for 15 points, they are also able to take a hidden blade for 10 points per model.

 

The Illuminator, elite choice 165 points

Bs4 F13 S12 R11 Hp3 Unit type: Fast Vehicle

Wargear:

• Lascannon
• kheres assault cannon
• Light forge illuminator
• armored ceramite

special rules:

Iwnd support unit Light forge illuminator: All units with the LA(WL) rule, gain a 6+ fnp (or a +1fnp if they already possesed a fnp roll) if they are within 8" of this vehicle support unit: When an Illuminator is destroyed, any Warden of Light unit within 6" of the wreck/point of destruction gain the rage special rule.

Options: The Illuminator may take up to 4 legion landspeeders to create a single vehicle unit, they are eligable to take all the upgrades from their normal profile with the appropiate point cost.

 

Special Units:

 

[falamh 's gun èifeachd] COIMHEADAIR

 

 

[falamh 's gun èifeachd] COIMHEADAIR 70 POINTS

WS BS S T W I A LD Sv

COIMHEADAIR 4 4 4 4 1 4 2 8 3+

Techmarine 4 4 4 4 1 4 2 8 2+

Empyric Manipulator - - - 7 2 - - - 3+

 

Unit Composition

• 2 COIMHEADAIR

Unit Type

• COIMHEADAIR: Infantry (Character)

Wargear

• Power armor (COIMHEADAIR only)
• Artificer armor (Techmarine only)
• Bolt Pistol
• Chaintonfa, Lance or combat blade
• Frag & Krak Grenades
• Servo-arm (Techmarine only)
• Bike (only if Empyric Manipulator wasn't purchased)

Special Rules

• Legiones Astartes (Wardens of Light)
• Battle smith (Techmarine only)*
• Psy-shield (Empyric Manipulator only)
• Battle Meditation Hexagramic Wards (Warders only)

*A Techmarine may restore a single wound to the Empyric Manipulator with each use of it's Battlesmith ability.

 

Options

A COIMHEADAIR-Team may take:

- Up to 3 additional COIMHEADAIR.................................................... +30 points each

- 1 Empyric Manipulator with Techmarine............................... +60 points*

*Choosing an Empyric Manipulator changes the Warding Team's Unit Type to Artillery.

 

Psy-shield: If the Empyric Manipulator is not moved during the movement phase then until the beginning of it's next turn it produces a shield that covers everything within (3 x No. of COIMHEADAIR)". The Empyric Manipulator rolls Deny the Witch rolls for ALL units targeted within this radius (friend and foe) including blessings that effect units within the area. Each attempt to Deny the Witch gains a number of additional dice equal to the number of successes made on the harness roll. And all Deny the Witch rolls made by the Empyric Manipulator succeed on a 4+.

 

Battle Meditation "Hexagramic Wards": Each COIMHEADAIR adds one dice to the Warp Charge pool, but only in the enemy psychic phase.

 

Battle Meditation "Summon the Vortex": If the COIMHEADAIR-Team has not purchased an Empyric Manipulator then they must all be deployed within 6" of each other, but afterwards operate independently. Any turn in which all remaining members do not move during the movement phase summons a vortex that lasts until the beginning of their next turn. The vortex effects the entire battlefield and has the following effects:

• If 1 COIMHEADAIR is alive then the vortex causes Psykers to suffer Perils of the Warp on any manifestation roll that includes two or more 6s and/or two or more 5s.
• If 2 COIMHEADAIR are alive then the vortex causes Psykers to suffer Perils of the Warp on any manifestation roll that includes two or more 6s; and/or two or more 5s and/or two or more 4s.
• If 3 COIMHEADAIR are alive then the vortex causes Psykers to suffer Perils of the Warp on any manifestation roll that includes two or more 6s; and/or two or more 5s; and/or two or more 4s and/or two or more 3s.
• If 4 COIMHEADAIR are alive then the vortex causes Psykers to suffer Perils of the Warp on any manifestation roll that includes two or more 6s; and/or two or more 5s; and/or two or more 4s; and/or two or more 3s and/or two or more 2s.
• If 5 COIMHEADAIR are alive then the vortex causes Psykers to suffer Perils of the Warp on any manifestation roll that includes two or more 6s; and/or two or more 5s; and/or two or more 4s; and/or two or more 3s; and/or two or more 2s and/or two or more 1s.

................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................

 

Sraonadh doininn (Heavy Support)

180 Points

 

 

WS BS S T W I A LD Sv

Storm Warrior 4 5 4 4 1 4 1 8 3+

 

Storm Leader­­ 5 5 4 4 1 4 2 9 3+

 

 

Unit Composition: 4 warriors 1 Storm Leader

Unit Type: Warriors: Infantry Storm Leader: Infantry (Character)

Wargear:

Power armor

Heavy Bolter

Bolt Pistol

Frag & Krak Grenades

Special Rules:

Legiones Astartes (Wardens of Light)

Battle Meditation "Storm of Fire"

Trajectory Analysis Protocols

Preferred Enemy (Vehicles)

Options:

The Sraonadh Doininn may take - Up to 5 additional Warriors for +25 points each

All of the Space Marines in the squad (including the Storm Leader) may exchange their heavy bolters for one of the following other heavy weapon types. If chosen, then all the heavy bolters in the squad must be exchanged for the same weapon:

- Autocannon for +5 points each

- Missile Launcher (with Frag & Krak missiles) for +5 points each

- Plasma Cannon for +15 points each

- Volkite Culverin for +10 points each

- Lascannon for +15 points each

The Storm Leader may take and of the following:

- Augury scanner for +5 points

- Melta-bombs for +5 points

- Upgrade to artificer armor for +10 points

Storm of fire: A unit of Sraonadh Doininn may choose to initiate a Storm of Fire at the beginning of their shooting phase. If so, all weapons in the unit may fire twice in that turn. They may not fire their heavy weapon the turn after, as they would either be recharging or reloading.

Trajectory Analysis Protocols: A unit of Sraonadh Doininn using their Storm of Fire ability may choose to use the Barrage special rule when resolving the shots, but shoot at -1bs

 

Lùth de òganach 230 points

 

WS BS S T W I A LD Sv

Warrior 5 4 5 4 1 5 2 9 3+

Leader 5 4 5 4 2 5 3 9 3+

 

Unit Composition: 5 Lùth

Unit Type: Jump Infantry

Wargear:

• Power armor
• Hand Flamer
• Dual sabre
• Jump Pack
• Frag & Krak Grenades
• refractor field

Special Rules:

• Legiones Astartes (WoL)
• Psy-hunters
• Favoured of Gwalchavad
• Precision Strikes
• Battle Meditation "A Storm of blades"

Options:

• The Lùth de òganach may take - Up to 5 additional Lùth for +45 points each
• Any Lùth may exchange its dual sabre for - dual chain tonfas free
• Any Lùth may exchange its hand flamer for +5 points to a hand melter
• The entire squad may take melta-bombs +25 points

• Favoured of Gwalchavad: A unit of Lùth de òganach may be chosen instead of a Command squad as bodyguards for any Jump Pack equipped Praetor of the Wardens of Light Legion (Or the Primarch Gwalchavad himself).
• Lùth de òganach must always be modelled/painted to be visually distinct from standard Legion Assault squads/Command squads to avoid confusion.
• Battle Meditation "A Storm of Blades": The Luth may both move 12" and gain the impact hits rule on the charge, also, on the turn they charge, they gain +d3 attacks for charging instead of the mandatory +1 attack
• Psy-hunters: Collectively the Lùth de òganach are able to have negative effects on enemy psykers. They count as being equipped with Psyk-out grenades.

Chain tonfa's: R- S: user ap5 warding, when two handed add +1A in profile

Dual Sabre: R- S: user Ap3 duelist edge, rending (5+), warding,+1A, may not shoot any weapons and two handed (The Luth ignore the two handed and no shooting rule)

warding: enemy models count as having -1I when fighting a model/unit equiped with weapons with this special rule.

Edited November 20, 2015 by MikhalLeNoir

[Hesh Kadesh]

RULES FOR THE RULES GOD. Holy moly, that's a lot of work pal!

 

From the top;

 

Legiones Astartes (Wardens of Light)

Do you not have Legiones Astartes as standard?

Flight of Light; Jump Infantry with Hit and Run? Treads on the toes of Angel's Wrath a little bit. Perhaps just limit it to the player turn in which the Legiones Astartes Jump Infantry complete a change? I know Angel's Wrath kinda sucks, but it should still really have some reason to be taken. This means that the super powered ability of being able to assault, stay in combat for 2 phases, before jumping back out at the end of the opponents turn, and recharging can't happen, you've got to risk assaulting and hopping out at the end of their own turn and risk a charge or shooting. It's still powerful, but less golly!!!! rule. Hit and Run is up there with Fearless and Infiltrate as "most powerful rules". 

Burning Light; I like that Heavy Weapon Squads are now having a reason to be taken. I like this idea, although I do think that we can possibly work this into the Battle Meditations somewhere?

Perfected Assault; Oooh yeah. Basically, see this as being able to use the Jump Pack in both phases as a result of some limited targeting. Very nice. Combined with Hit and Run it could be very powerful but certainly influences use of Assault Marines and Jump Pack Destroyers. 

Legion of Blanks; Limitation on Psykers is fitting. I'll leave it to you with Grifft to come up with rules for selecting Pariah traits etc. 

The Wardens; May not take more Tanks than Infantry. This is a decent penalty, but due to the bonuses available for the legion, Tanks are going to be very thin on the ground in any case, and wouldn't be the penalty it would for another. Tanks means no transporting Hit and Run Move+Assault Jump Packs and limited Heavy Weapon Squads. I'd suggest either limiting it to non-vehicle troops, or perhaps throwing in "The Bitter End" which makes it a risk for your army if they're winning. 

 

Now, I made mention of Battle Meditations earlier. I don't really understand them. Is this just a funky name for a special rule? If so, how about actually tacking on some mechanics to the "Battle Meditations"? The one I have in mind is similar to Black Templars old "pray" mechanic, similar to Bretonnians as well. A similar thing to Alpha Legions mutable tactics as well. This is my idea for it; Essentially, all models with the Legiones Astartes (Wardens of Light) may elect to Meditate before battle. If they do so, then the rules under the specific Battle Meditation take place. Only one meditation may be in effect on a unit. However, certain characters in the army have unique Meditations. These meditations may be undertaken seperately from the rest of the army; they do not get the effect of the general Meditation, even if they'd normally qualify. Instead, they get access to their own unique mediation. 

 

If we can come up with some Battle Meditations to apply, then this allows a few things. 

 

For example, we have both Druss, Mikheal, and Gwal in an army. (It's all going down). 

 

The army Meditates for "Generic rule X", which lets all Jump Pack equipped models gain the Hit and Run special rule on the charge (to use as an example). Now, Gwal has Hit and Run already, but Mikhael knows that he is joining a unit of Jump Pack infantry, so gains Hit and Run on the charge that way, and instead chooses to meditate and pick up his "Get Over Here" Meditation (we need to come up with a name for that which is not so completely obviously tropey I think ;D), while Druss picks up Dirty Fighter. As infantry and someone who cannot join units, Hit and Run on the assault is useless for him, so he is free to pick up something more appropriate to him. Gwal Picks up "The Eight Gates" as he knows that he is facing Icarion and likely to take a large amount of damage, and has Hit and Run already.

 

I don't know, that was a quick spit ball, and would turn the Legiones Astartes (Wardens of Light) look like (including a bit of nomenclature clearing up, I hope that this isn't too presumptive of me?)

 

Legiones Astartes (Wardens of Light)

Legiones Astartes; As per Legiones Astartes Crusade Army List.

Battle Meditations; Immediately after generating Warlord Traits, any army containing Wardens of Light may elect to make a Battle Meditation. Select a single Meditation from the list below. These Meditations only apply to the models/units listed in the individual Battle Meditation. In addition Independent Characters with the Legiones Astartes (Wardens of Light) special rule may choose to meditate alone from the rest of their force. These individuals may each select another Battle Meditation to apply to themselves alone (provided they meet the requisites) rather than the Battle Meditation that applies to the rest of the force. Certain characters also have their own unique Battle Meditations within their unit entries. Only they may benefit from these Battle Meditations. A model may never be under the effect of more than one Battle Meditation (although rules which affect entire units will affect Independent Characters as per normal).

Perfected Assault; Units made up entirely of Jump Infantry with this special rule may always use their Jump Pack in the assault phase (even if they have already used it during the movement phase) provided that their primary target was hit by a shooting attack by a model with the Legiones Astartes (Wardens of Light) special rule.

Pariah Legion; This legion is considered to be a Pariah. No models with the Psyker special rule may be selected by a Wardens of Light Detachment. The following units may select the Twisted Brotherhood upgrade; [X], [X], etc etc. Any model or Twisted Brotherhood selecting Pariah Abilities must select the Focus ability of any category they take at least 1st level in before selecting additional abilities or levels in that category.

The Wardens; A Wardens of Light Primary Detachment may not take Fortification Detachments. In addition, such detachments cannot have more models units with the Tank type than units with the Legiones Astartes (Wardens of Light) special rule (Individual Characters excluded).

 

Battle Meditations

- Flight of Light; Any model with Legiones Astartes (Wardens of Light) and Jump Infantry or Jump Infantry (Character) unit type gains the Hit and Run special rule for the player turn in which such a model makes a successful charge.

- Burning Light; Any Legion Tactical Support Squad and Legion Heavy Support Squad may choose one of the following special rules to apply to all shooting attacks made by members of that unit (excluding Independent Characters); Pinning, Shred, Twin-linked...

- Meditation 3

- Meditation 4

- Etc

 

This allows us to add to the Battle Meditations as the books progress as well come up with some new ideas. I don't know if that is helpful for you? Other ideas; including Preferred Enemy (Monstrous Creatures), Precision Shot, and/or Concussive with Burning Light, a new meditation for Fleet and Scout on Jump Infantry, Jump Infantry getting 1st turn Reserves but must deploy via Jump Pack Deep Strike, AP5 Hammers of Wrath and Furious Charge for Jump Infantry, all WoL Characters gain Rampage special rule but cannot benefit from Look Out, Sir. 

 

Just a few spitballed options?

 

Weapons

This is a tough one. I quite like what you've done with them, but I can't help think that they are really good for what they do. 3pts is bit of an expense, but 60pts gets +1 attack, strike before other legiones, and AP5. Forcing -1 Initiative is a pretty powerful ability, especially as it can affect something like a Dreadnought Close Combat Weapon or a Knight. Affecting the self is worth +2ppm on a conditional +1 Initiative. Permanent is possibly +5ppm, and having it affect enemies is something like a *1.5; if we call it a 7.5ppm, and that's not including the AP5 (perhaps 0.5pts), you're looking at a unit being 80-160pts, depending on unit (think Terminators with Pride of the Legion etc). How that works as well with Breacher Shields for the +1 Attack is kind of hard to work out. Even giving it a discount to 5pts, to Charnabal level on mid-tier unit equivalents (like Palatine Blades)  

 

Short of pricing it so high, I can't really see a way forward for the Chain Tonfa. Rather than providing access to troops, why not just keep the Chain Tonfa as a Close Combat Weapon, but make the Power Tonfa a legion specific weapon? Power Sword which gains the Deflect Special rule (increases Weapon Skill of the Bearer for each attack they forgo in Close Combat, to a minimum of 1 attack). Can make an assault unit WS7 on the charge which could be good against things like Power Axe Veletaris. 

 

Dual Sabre; ANOTHER Legion unique Power Weapon? Hmm. Why not just keep it as a Power Weapon with Duellist Edge? I can't help but feel that Warding is too good a rule to give any old model a single Power Weapon and then let any old attack get -1 Initiative.

 

Alternatively, Caedere Weapons for World Eaters;

 

Warden Panoply;

- Power Tonfa's; Power Mauls, Paired*, +1 Initiative, 

- Dual Sabre; Power Swords, Two Handed, Rending, Duellists Edge

- Excoriator Chainaxe; As per Caedere

- Meteor Hammer; As per Caedere

 

*Paired will be clarified to be a Two-Handed Weapon which grants the bearer +1 Attack.

 

Hidden Blades; I originally thought this was just a Primarch only thing, but every dude seems to be toting one now. And I've got to admit, from a fluff standpoint, I don't really agree with it; pretty much every model in the game I'd expect to have a hidden blade somewhere. What makes this Hidden Blade so special? If I was to give it rules, possibly just give it the model an additional Hammer of Wrath of Attack, but at -1 Strength to simplify.

 

UNITS

Illuminator; Struggling Hard to picture this vehicle at all. Like, really. And how does it Illuminate? Is it like a Warp Conduit? On a Pariah legion? Why does it give them special effects? Or is it like a really big Searchlight?

 

Single Lascannon, single Kheres... Eh. I'm not a massive fan of completely creating new vehicles from scratch, especially when it doesn't seem to be a modified version of the existing vehicles. And that is buffs the units, AND THEN makes them EVEN BETTER if it's killed? No, sorry, that's much too overkill. This is one of those units where I need to learn a lot more about it, but this comes across more as a Xenos unit than anything a Legion would field. It just doesn't feel right at all.

 

Suggestions on how to make it work... Urm... Not sure. Seeing the initial baseline struck me as a Sicaran based unit; A Sicaran with a Razorback Turret (Twin-linked Rotor Cannons, upgrade to Twin-linked Lascannons or a Lascannon and a Plasma Blaster sounds like a nice little 30k thing, but I don't know where to go to give it the FNP or Rage bit from, as I really don't have a clue on how the fluff makes it work. One suggestion would be to have it enhance Pariah abilities; but the Comheadair does that already.

 

Coimheadair, one of my favourite units in the setting, although I'm not quite sure I like the mechanics. The really important bit about this unit is the Manipulator; the idea of some "Pariah Wyrdstone" being wheeled into battle sounds very cool. Otherwise, it's just a bunch of Pariahs sitting playing dice games out of danger bumping up the pool. Why not just turn it into a special unit based around the Manipulator? Unit is a Techmarine with a Manipulator, and can take some ablative bodies as well that work to amplify the powers of the stone. With the suggestion of the Battle Meditations above, the unit would become Broken, what about this? Got to admit, not really sure where the Techmarine comes in.  What's with the name. Google says "Watch Out For It"?

 

Empyric Manipulator

Coimheadair

 

Unit Size; 2 Coimheadair, 1 Empyric Manipulator

Options; May purchase up to 3 additional Coimheadair

 

Empyric Manipulator; Any non-Pariah unit within 3" of the Empyric Manipulator no longer counts as Scoring or Denial. This range is multiplied by the number of Coimheadair within the unit. In addition, if any Pariah abilities are bought for the Empyric Manipulator, any friendly Pariah unit within this same area gains the abilities as if they purchased them normally.

 

The Empyric Manipulator is a Pariah Primus. Unlike the rest of the Legion, it does not need to purchase the Focus ability.

 

Scrabble Doininn. Yeah. I can't spell these. The names don't really work with standard English. I understand that it's celtic, or thereabouts reminiscent, but it's really difficult to not only spell but say as well. Google says "Storm Blast", which is kind of cool. Why not just call them that? Storm Blast Grenadiers or Heavenstrike Bombards or something equally evocative, or what not? If we're using "Linguistic" names, they need to roll easily, like Mhara Gal, or Gal Vorbak. That fulfils typical english conventions.

 

Legion Elite HSS though? Nice.

 

The Battle Meditation though? Again, needs some work. These need actual mechanics, or just drop the Meditation. It's very, very confusing. And of those weapons, how does Storm of Fire actually work with giant lasers? Volkites and Lascannons almost certainly not, Plasma with difficulty and Autocannons, although a physical bullet are direct fire. My brother in law in the marines used to "loop" GPMG shots well past their normal range limitations (something like perhaps nearly half again as much), but they were so innacurate that they couldn't hit a thing, and were used to keep enemy heads down. Essentially, the only thing that leaves are the Missile Launchers.

 

I think a unit of HSS, equipped with Independent Tracking Frag/Krak Missiles (see Deredeo Aiolos Launcher, apart from the "different target bit" - could give the Frag Missiles Barrage and Pinning and the Flakk Missiles the ability to force rerolls on Jink) and a Flakk Missile option could be quite cool. They lose a bit of flexibility, but after all, they don't benefit from the Legion rules on HSS's anyway so if you want that rule, taking the HSS's is better. You don't really want to buff HSS squads, but then make them still worse than the legion specifics.

 

Luth De Oganach; this is a better name, although I'd personally just keep it at "De Oganach"; it seems to roll smoother. Is there any reason why "Ogenach" (meaning "youth", according to Google) are so good? Have I just mistranslated it? Not got a problem with the units power, I think they're fine though.

 

In regards to the unit balance itself; bearing in mind the changes suggested to the Dual Sabres;

 

I'd improve their Weapon option to just be "Warden Panoply" as suggested. Makes them a bit more flexible at modelling options.

 

S5; really? What gives them this? Only S5 units in the game are Gal Vorbak. As loyalists and Pariahs, almost certainly not possessed. Perhaps just stick with Furious Charge? Their Battle Meditation is already subsumed into the above suggestion for Battle Meditations (and Mikheal, oddly).

 

That's it so far, I'll comment on the characters after. Really love what you've done, and I hope we can come to something close to your vision that's tight with the ruleset ;)

 

Meanwhile, it's 3am, sleep time.

[MikhalLeNoir]

Woah long long mail. Thx hesh. I need a ot of time to go through it. ;)

 

The Battle Meditations are indeed only a funky name for special rules.....until now what you proposed is simply.....awesome. I look what the rulemasters say.

[Grifftofer]

RULES FOR THE RULES GOD. Holy moly, that's a lot of work pal!

 

From the top;

 

Legiones Astartes (Wardens of Light)

Do you not have Legiones Astartes as standard?

Flight of Light; Jump Infantry with Hit and Run? Treads on the toes of Angel's Wrath a little bit. Perhaps just limit it to the player turn in which the Legiones Astartes Jump Infantry complete a change? I know Angel's Wrath kinda sucks, but it should still really have some reason to be taken. This means that the super powered ability of being able to assault, stay in combat for 2 phases, before jumping back out at the end of the opponents turn, and recharging can't happen, you've got to risk assaulting and hopping out at the end of their own turn and risk a charge or shooting. It's still powerful, but less golly!!!! rule. Hit and Run is up there with Fearless and Infiltrate as "most powerful rules". 

Burning Light; I like that Heavy Weapon Squads are now having a reason to be taken. I like this idea, although I do think that we can possibly work this into the Battle Meditations somewhere?

Perfected Assault; Oooh yeah. Basically, see this as being able to use the Jump Pack in both phases as a result of some limited targeting. Very nice. Combined with Hit and Run it could be very powerful but certainly influences use of Assault Marines and Jump Pack Destroyers. 

Legion of Blanks; Limitation on Psykers is fitting. I'll leave it to you with Grifft to come up with rules for selecting Pariah traits etc. 

The Wardens; May not take more Tanks than Infantry. This is a decent penalty, but due to the bonuses available for the legion, Tanks are going to be very thin on the ground in any case, and wouldn't be the penalty it would for another. Tanks means no transporting Hit and Run Move+Assault Jump Packs and limited Heavy Weapon Squads. I'd suggest either limiting it to non-vehicle troops, or perhaps throwing in "The Bitter End" which makes it a risk for your army if they're winning. 

 

Now, I made mention of Battle Meditations earlier. I don't really understand them. Is this just a funky name for a special rule? If so, how about actually tacking on some mechanics to the "Battle Meditations"? The one I have in mind is similar to Black Templars old "pray" mechanic, similar to Bretonnians as well. A similar thing to Alpha Legions mutable tactics as well. This is my idea for it; Essentially, all models with the Legiones Astartes (Wardens of Light) may elect to Meditate before battle. If they do so, then the rules under the specific Battle Meditation take place. Only one meditation may be in effect on a unit. However, certain characters in the army have unique Meditations. These meditations may be undertaken seperately from the rest of the army; they do not get the effect of the general Meditation, even if they'd normally qualify. Instead, they get access to their own unique mediation. 

 

If we can come up with some Battle Meditations to apply, then this allows a few things. 

 

For example, we have both Druss, Mikheal, and Gwal in an army. (It's all going down). 

 

The army Meditates for "Generic rule X", which lets all Jump Pack equipped models gain the Hit and Run special rule on the charge (to use as an example). Now, Gwal has Hit and Run already, but Mikhael knows that he is joining a unit of Jump Pack infantry, so gains Hit and Run on the charge that way, and instead chooses to meditate and pick up his "Get Over Here" Meditation (we need to come up with a name for that which is not so completely obviously tropey I think ;D), while Druss picks up Dirty Fighter. As infantry and someone who cannot join units, Hit and Run on the assault is useless for him, so he is free to pick up something more appropriate to him. Gwal Picks up "The Eight Gates" as he knows that he is facing Icarion and likely to take a large amount of damage, and has Hit and Run already.

 

I don't know, that was a quick spit ball, and would turn the Legiones Astartes (Wardens of Light) look like (including a bit of nomenclature clearing up, I hope that this isn't too presumptive of me?)

 

Legiones Astartes (Wardens of Light)

Legiones Astartes; As per Legiones Astartes Crusade Army List.

Battle Meditations; Immediately after generating Warlord Traits, any army containing Wardens of Light may elect to make a Battle Meditation. Select a single Meditation from the list below. These Meditations only apply to the models/units listed in the individual Battle Meditation. In addition Independent Characters with the Legiones Astartes (Wardens of Light) special rule may choose to meditate alone from the rest of their force. These individuals may each select another Battle Meditation to apply to themselves alone (provided they meet the requisites) rather than the Battle Meditation that applies to the rest of the force. Certain characters also have their own unique Battle Meditations within their unit entries. Only they may benefit from these Battle Meditations. A model may never be under the effect of more than one Battle Meditation (although rules which affect entire units will affect Independent Characters as per normal).

Perfected Assault; Units made up entirely of Jump Infantry with this special rule may always use their Jump Pack in the assault phase (even if they have already used it during the movement phase) provided that their primary target was hit by a shooting attack by a model with the Legiones Astartes (Wardens of Light) special rule.

Pariah Legion; This legion is considered to be a Pariah. No models with the Psyker special rule may be selected by a Wardens of Light Detachment. The following units may select the Twisted Brotherhood upgrade; [X], [X], etc etc. Any model or Twisted Brotherhood selecting Pariah Abilities must select the Focus ability of any category they take at least 1st level in before selecting additional abilities or levels in that category.

The Wardens; A Wardens of Light Primary Detachment may not take Fortification Detachments. In addition, such detachments cannot have more models units with the Tank type than units with the Legiones Astartes (Wardens of Light) special rule (Individual Characters excluded).

 

Battle Meditations

- Flight of Light; Any model with Legiones Astartes (Wardens of Light) and Jump Infantry or Jump Infantry (Character) unit type gains the Hit and Run special rule for the player turn in which such a model makes a successful charge.

- Burning Light; Any Legion Tactical Support Squad and Legion Heavy Support Squad may choose one of the following special rules to apply to all shooting attacks made by members of that unit (excluding Independent Characters); Pinning, Shred, Twin-linked...

- Meditation 3

- Meditation 4

- Etc

 

This allows us to add to the Battle Meditations as the books progress as well come up with some new ideas. I don't know if that is helpful for you? Other ideas; including Preferred Enemy (Monstrous Creatures), Precision Shot, and/or Concussive with Burning Light, a new meditation for Fleet and Scout on Jump Infantry, Jump Infantry getting 1st turn Reserves but must deploy via Jump Pack Deep Strike, AP5 Hammers of Wrath and Furious Charge for Jump Infantry, all WoL Characters gain Rampage special rule but cannot benefit from Look Out, Sir. 

 

Just a few spitballed options?

 

Weapons

This is a tough one. I quite like what you've done with them, but I can't help think that they are really good for what they do. 3pts is bit of an expense, but 60pts gets +1 attack, strike before other legiones, and AP5. Forcing -1 Initiative is a pretty powerful ability, especially as it can affect something like a Dreadnought Close Combat Weapon or a Knight. Affecting the self is worth +2ppm on a conditional +1 Initiative. Permanent is possibly +5ppm, and having it affect enemies is something like a *1.5; if we call it a 7.5ppm, and that's not including the AP5 (perhaps 0.5pts), you're looking at a unit being 80-160pts, depending on unit (think Terminators with Pride of the Legion etc). How that works as well with Breacher Shields for the +1 Attack is kind of hard to work out. Even giving it a discount to 5pts, to Charnabal level on mid-tier unit equivalents (like Palatine Blades)  

 

Short of pricing it so high, I can't really see a way forward for the Chain Tonfa. Rather than providing access to troops, why not just keep the Chain Tonfa as a Close Combat Weapon, but make the Power Tonfa a legion specific weapon? Power Sword which gains the Deflect Special rule (increases Weapon Skill of the Bearer for each attack they forgo in Close Combat, to a minimum of 1 attack). Can make an assault unit WS7 on the charge which could be good against things like Power Axe Veletaris. 

 

Dual Sabre; ANOTHER Legion unique Power Weapon? Hmm. Why not just keep it as a Power Weapon with Duellist Edge? I can't help but feel that Warding is too good a rule to give any old model a single Power Weapon and then let any old attack get -1 Initiative.

 

Alternatively, Caedere Weapons for World Eaters;

 

Warden Panoply;

- Power Tonfa's; Power Mauls, Paired*, +1 Initiative, 

- Dual Sabre; Power Swords, Two Handed, Rending, Duellists Edge

- Excoriator Chainaxe; As per Caedere

- Meteor Hammer; As per Caedere

 

*Paired will be clarified to be a Two-Handed Weapon which grants the bearer +1 Attack.

 

Hidden Blades; I originally thought this was just a Primarch only thing, but every dude seems to be toting one now. And I've got to admit, from a fluff standpoint, I don't really agree with it; pretty much every model in the game I'd expect to have a hidden blade somewhere. What makes this Hidden Blade so special? If I was to give it rules, possibly just give it the model an additional Hammer of Wrath of Attack, but at -1 Strength to simplify.

 

UNITS

Illuminator; Struggling Hard to picture this vehicle at all. Like, really. And how does it Illuminate? Is it like a Warp Conduit? On a Pariah legion? Why does it give them special effects? Or is it like a really big Searchlight?

 

Single Lascannon, single Kheres... Eh. I'm not a massive fan of completely creating new vehicles from scratch, especially when it doesn't seem to be a modified version of the existing vehicles. And that is buffs the units, AND THEN makes them EVEN BETTER if it's killed? No, sorry, that's much too overkill. This is one of those units where I need to learn a lot more about it, but this comes across more as a Xenos unit than anything a Legion would field. It just doesn't feel right at all.

 

Suggestions on how to make it work... Urm... Not sure. Seeing the initial baseline struck me as a Sicaran based unit; A Sicaran with a Razorback Turret (Twin-linked Rotor Cannons, upgrade to Twin-linked Lascannons or a Lascannon and a Plasma Blaster sounds like a nice little 30k thing, but I don't know where to go to give it the FNP or Rage bit from, as I really don't have a clue on how the fluff makes it work. One suggestion would be to have it enhance Pariah abilities; but the Comheadair does that already.

 

Coimheadair, one of my favourite units in the setting, although I'm not quite sure I like the mechanics. The really important bit about this unit is the Manipulator; the idea of some "Pariah Wyrdstone" being wheeled into battle sounds very cool. Otherwise, it's just a bunch of Pariahs sitting playing dice games out of danger bumping up the pool. Why not just turn it into a special unit based around the Manipulator? Unit is a Techmarine with a Manipulator, and can take some ablative bodies as well that work to amplify the powers of the stone. With the suggestion of the Battle Meditations above, the unit would become Broken, what about this? Got to admit, not really sure where the Techmarine comes in.  What's with the name. Google says "Watch Out For It"?

 

Empyric Manipulator

Coimheadair

 

Unit Size; 2 Coimheadair, 1 Empyric Manipulator

Options; May purchase up to 3 additional Coimheadair

 

Empyric Manipulator; Any non-Pariah unit within 3" of the Empyric Manipulator no longer counts as Scoring or Denial. This range is multiplied by the number of Coimheadair within the unit. In addition, if any Pariah abilities are bought for the Empyric Manipulator, any friendly Pariah unit within this same area gains the abilities as if they purchased them normally.

 

The Empyric Manipulator is a Pariah Primus. Unlike the rest of the Legion, it does not need to purchase the Focus ability.

 

Scrabble Doininn. Yeah. I can't spell these. The names don't really work with standard English. I understand that it's celtic, or thereabouts reminiscent, but it's really difficult to not only spell but say as well. Google says "Storm Blast", which is kind of cool. Why not just call them that? Storm Blast Grenadiers or Heavenstrike Bombards or something equally evocative, or what not? If we're using "Linguistic" names, they need to roll easily, like Mhara Gal, or Gal Vorbak. That fulfils typical english conventions.

 

Legion Elite HSS though? Nice.

 

The Battle Meditation though? Again, needs some work. These need actual mechanics, or just drop the Meditation. It's very, very confusing. And of those weapons, how does Storm of Fire actually work with giant lasers? Volkites and Lascannons almost certainly not, Plasma with difficulty and Autocannons, although a physical bullet are direct fire. My brother in law in the marines used to "loop" GPMG shots well past their normal range limitations (something like perhaps nearly half again as much), but they were so innacurate that they couldn't hit a thing, and were used to keep enemy heads down. Essentially, the only thing that leaves are the Missile Launchers.

 

I think a unit of HSS, equipped with Independent Tracking Frag/Krak Missiles (see Deredeo Aiolos Launcher, apart from the "different target bit" - could give the Frag Missiles Barrage and Pinning and the Flakk Missiles the ability to force rerolls on Jink) and a Flakk Missile option could be quite cool. They lose a bit of flexibility, but after all, they don't benefit from the Legion rules on HSS's anyway so if you want that rule, taking the HSS's is better. You don't really want to buff HSS squads, but then make them still worse than the legion specifics.

 

Luth De Oganach; this is a better name, although I'd personally just keep it at "De Oganach"; it seems to roll smoother. Is there any reason why "Ogenach" (meaning "youth", according to Google) are so good? Have I just mistranslated it? Not got a problem with the units power, I think they're fine though.

 

In regards to the unit balance itself; bearing in mind the changes suggested to the Dual Sabres;

 

I'd improve their Weapon option to just be "Warden Panoply" as suggested. Makes them a bit more flexible at modelling options.

 

S5; really? What gives them this? Only S5 units in the game are Gal Vorbak. As loyalists and Pariahs, almost certainly not possessed. Perhaps just stick with Furious Charge? Their Battle Meditation is already subsumed into the above suggestion for Battle Meditations (and Mikheal, oddly).

 

That's it so far, I'll comment on the characters after. Really love what you've done, and I hope we can come to something close to your vision that's tight with the ruleset

 

Meanwhile, it's 3am, sleep time.

Wow. Very nice and throrough assessment of the rules there Hesh :) I was the one who wrote the initial rules for most of the special units so I'll probably focus on them. I will say that I find the idea of Battle Meditations very interesting, though maybe with the caveat that any unit/character that has a unique battle meditation may chose to take that rather than the army benefit. This is basically what you have already suggested, but lets the unique units keep their flavour as well as the special characters.

 

Coimheadair:

So the initial idea was to create a unit that could ward off an area to protect against the powers of the warp. From my point of view I thought the idea that the Wardens had a piece of arcane tech that could be used to enhance their pariah abilities was a cool one. This was also when I was under the impression that pariah was a more minor aspect of the legion, as it seems to have become more prominent since, so using something to amplify their power kind of made sense from that perspective as well. This was also the reason for the Techmarine as a piece of Dark Age tech would likely be temperamental and needing of constant adjustment, which would be provided by said techmarine.

 

I have to admit that having re-worked the Pariah abilities I think that the rules I made are over-written and could easily be simplified in some way, either as you suggest or possibly in a different direction. All I can say is that I was trying to evoke the themes of being a pariah/psychic null without stepping too much on the toes of my own legion. Honestly I think that the whole thing could be pretty simply done by saying that the comheadair are a Twisted Brotherhood (maybe with a slightly higher point limit) and that if they take an empyric manipulator they get double the range on any abilities they purchase. I still like the idea of the techmarine standing there keeping everything running, but if Mikhal decides he doesn't want it then I will understand.

 

Sraonadh doininn:

These seem to have changed a bit since I wrote them initially, so actually the way in which their trajectory analysis is supposed to work is no longer viable for most weapons the unit has. Initially the Storm of Fire was an alternate shooting effect which allowed the unit to fill an area with weapon fire.

 

Storm of Fire: A unit of Sraonadh Doininn may choose to initiate a Storm of Fire at the beginning of their shooting phase. If they do so they make a single attack, as a unit, with the profile of the weapons that they are carrying. However this attack has additional special rules depending on how many models are remaining in the squad.

 

1-3: No Storm of Fire shots may be made

4-7: Blast

8+: Large Blast

The barrage would then represent them picking out weak spots on vehicles(hitting side armour) or punching through cover (barrage cover mechanics) as well as making really difficult shots through ruined buildings (ignoring interveneing cover). When we were discussing it Mikhal was quite clear that he wanted to keep the energy weapons in the unit and I did consider making the  barrage solid weapons only, but there is not listing of 'solid' weapons so I'd have to write out what was/wasn't allowed in a somewhat arbitrary manner. In the end I thought that giving it to everyone and just fluffing it as not arcing the lasers would be fine.

 

With them now having the option to 'Fury of the Legion' I think trajectory analysis is redundant and could be removed. I do think having some of the aiolos launcher rules is in interesting one and not one I considered as I didn't have their book at the time of writing these.

 

Lùth de òganach:

Glad you mostly like these guys, they were probably the most straightforward of the units conceptually. So I'm glad I got them right at least. Though looking at them again they seem to have gained +1S, I and some equipment since I wrote them, though they have gone up in price quite dramatically. I think that as it stands the combo of I5 and -1 enemy I is quite harsh, it makes them strike before everyone short of certain special characters and most of the Primarchs.

[MikhalLeNoir]

Thx mates. We will consider that. Although i left the comheadair untouched cause I love them so.

 

Just a few words:

 

Names:

 

I like the Gaelic and want to keep them. Maybe add the translation behind.

 

Luth de Oganach means "Power of Youth"

Comheadair are fully named [falamh 's gun èifeachd] COIMHEADAIR what means not "watch out" although that would be cool. It means Null/Void guardians. Comheadair aimply means Guardians ;)

 

The storm blast we already cleared.

 

Tonight we try to overwork the rules. But some Thinking:

 

Chaintonfas should be simply chainswords. Two handed i want to have them to have a defense bonus in CC. Maybe we really add simply the deflect rule.

The Dual Sabers are chainweapons. Take a look http://www.spellcrow.com/space-knights-doublesaw-weapons-p-328.html

When AO and I discussed the rules for them we had the nostromon chainblades and eviscerator in mind. But also the speed option for them. Speed is everything.

Power tonfas. I consider as the same as the chain tonfas. More like power swirds. But we habe much time to rework them.

 

So the illuminator.... He is based on this baby http://vignette3.wikia.nocookie.net/warhammer40k/images/f/f1/DA_Vengeance_Model.jpg/revision/latest?cb=20130126012755

As i didn't have the money to buy me a squad of javelins, and as i dont have the bits to kitbash me my grav transport vehicle, the idea was to use that as base and AO came up with the in my mind really cool idea of the Light bringer device.

A squad of landspeeder would attack the back of the enemy and the heavy support the front. And assault teams and luth will have their fun;)

Guess we went a bit overboard.

But the name stays;)

 

The idea for the hidden blade was mine and grifft put it into a rule set, what in my opinion fittet the lore of xenos friendly wardens, whose weapons are made if the black core of caerbannog. And to in order to reachr adulthood, the youths had to go to the core and return with a black stone. That stone cuts everything and ipon their return they have to forge a blade and as a adult you are alowed to wear the blade in your braid. The wardens utilized this tradition and so charscters who are "adults" get the braid and the blade. So they train to actively use it. Bit of course a blade on a braid is not very strong. So it has only s1 but ap1 derives from the material.

 

Phew. More will come. But we must first reworke aome of the rules to implement your comments. Maybe I can get the blast back ;)

 

 

P.S:

On the Techmarine. Normally I hate them, but I bought two and device which will be kitbashed into the empiric manipulator.( i will take my saw and cut off the crystal of a skylanders figur gnahsjaahjaajaj)

So he will be kept. You have to cut me into pieces ;)

 

I am for the project: save the comheadair;)

Edited November 2, 2015 by MikhalLeNoir

[MikhalLeNoir]

Okay guys, today I used my korean lecture to ignore the lesson and instead write the 2nd Part of "The End of Light"

As I was the whole time in danger to get caught, there could be a lot of errors in my text. so it would be very helpful, if some of you can edit the text. I then will build a warden of light with your names for all who help^^

 

so here is the text, hope it is a good read.

Hidden Content

 

THIS IS AN OLD VERSION WITH OLD NAMES, OLD STYLES AND IT SIMPLY SMELLS OLD!!!! ONLY KEPT FOR SENTIMENTAL FEELINGS!!!!

GO ON AND READ THE REVISED VARIANT!!!! IT IS IN EVERY WAY BETTER

End of Light pt. 2

 

Heavy rain poured from the heaven. The drum of it piercing the ground mixed up with the sound of bolter rounds exploding in his brother’s armor.

 

Druss hacked the head from a space wolf from his neck and crushed the chest of another with his power fist. Hacking, crushing, evading, countering.  The battle was like a dance and Druss followed the deadly rhythm. Wardens around him died, but he was no ordinary Warden. He was the Blademaster, and he welcomed the rage, which overtook him as he fought his way through the enemy ranks.

 

As he felled more and more of his foes, he felt like a god of old. As he brought dead, he felt alive. The colours were stronger, the taste of the air was more vivid. He even could smell the blood of his fallen brothers.

 

A space wolf sergeant approached him, aiming with a big sword for his head, Druss parried the attack and answered with a deadly riposte, but his enemy evaded the strike. Both circled around each other. Even as the Wardens of Light and Space wolves clashed against each other like waves against a cliff, the two adversaries were in their own world, ignoring the storm of battle around them.

 

Druss attacked, swung his big battle-axe Snaga in a murderous arc, the wolf anticipated the move and stepped back, preparing himself for a counter move. But Druss stopped with his movement half way through and leapt with the flat side of Snaga forward, toppling his enemy and knocking him of his feet. Druss jumped on him, pinning him on the ground and landed a crashing blow with his power fist on his enemy’s visor, smash through his jaw and crushing his head with the rhythm of the rain splashing down.

 

As he sat there, atop of his enemy he laughed at the situation, how has it come so far?

…

Again they befriended an enemy, making peace with Xenos, where there should have been war. The former apostles grew uneasy. Since they were reunited they more and more were absent from the glories of battle. Now that they were wardens of light, their primarch set the course of peace. Druss knew, that this was not what their allfather wanted, yet he followed his father on his way. But he knew, that there other voices among their ranks. Not openly raised, but more like a whisper. First the whispers were rarely heard, but as the great crusade went on, and Gwalchavad choose the fight only as last answer, the whisper grew louder and spread through the ranks of the wardens. Their father dismissed them and after the Emperor agreed to add the Xenos of Nosgoth to his Imperium, the whispers suddenly subsided.

 

They awaited the Siglite and his personal guard, to escort them to the capital. The Astartes of the Wardens lined up as honour guard and were only equipped with light weaponry as they were a symbol for peace. Gwalchavad with Mikhal, the Scorpion and his Luth de Oganach was beside the Siglite and the Xenos leaders. It should have been a time of joy, but Druss felt something. A tickle on his neck, as if something big was going to happen, but he could not focus on the thought. He stood there, weighing Snaga in his hand, caressing the axe, which was at his side long before he underwent the painful transformation to become an Astartes. Back on Terra he was only a whelp, not knowing the real thrill of war.

 

He looked around, witnessing his brothers. The ones from Caerbannog, most free of emotions, as they accepted the gift of their father, and his terran brothers, the former „apostles of war“. It was as if he should have seen something. Like the tickle on the neck, he couldn’t grasp the thought. Druss gaze flew over his brothers, and then it stopped. He looked into the eyes of their former leader. The one, who stood at the head of the apostles, long before their father was found. Guaire Amalasan was a handsome man, long black hair, not formed into a braid, like it was custom among the Caerbannog wardens, but instead it just flowed over his shoulders. The Grey eyes gazing into Druss own eyes. And Druss knew….He made a step forward, Guaire slowly shook his head, put his helmet on and turned around.

 

…Then fire rained from the sky….Warden bodies were blasted through the air, torn apart like puppets in the hand of a kid. Druss was knocked unconscious as something close to him exploded and smashed him against a building…

 

…When he awoke, the sky was burning. He saw big ships crashing into the planet’s surface, it rained fire and water. An apocalyptic sight.  Everywhere lay the broken bodies of his brothers and the Xenos population. Their bodies in grotesque poses, flesh burned from them. Druss wasn’t sure what has happened, how long he was knocked out and who was responsible for this mess. Did the Xenos backstab them? Was it a trap to capture the Siglite? His head hurt, he should start to wear a helmet Druss thought. Pain ran through his leg and he realized that Snaga stuck in his leg. Always eager for blood my friend, he thought. With a sudden move, he tore the axe free. He examined the wound. It was not a deep and his armor plate absorbed most of the impact. He rised and looked for other survivors. He came across more dead wardens, but there were not as much death, as there should have been, if he was the only survivor.

 

In the distance Druss heard something. It seemed familiar, but he couldn’t remember. Then 3 grey marines appeared before him. They must be Space wolves, maybe sent here to rescue them? Was he so long knocked, that a rescue team was already here? He waved and yelled. The 3 wolves came close… And opened fire, Druss was only saved by his reflexes as he threw himself to the side and using Snaga to deflect the bolt rounds. He rushed behind a wall. He didn’t know what was going on. Why the wolves would attack him. But he had no time to think. They were here to kill him, and in order to survive, he had to kill them first. He took a glimpse to look over the wall. The swarmed out, trying to outflank him and attack from different sides. If they did, he wouldn’t have a chance, so he attacked. Throwing Snaga in the chest of the middle one and engaging the marine to his left, crushing into him with his shoulder. Druss grabbed his enemies head with his power fist and whirled around. The third wolf fired round after round into the body of his comrade, which Druss used as human shield. Druss waited until his shield was perforated and the magazine of his enemy was empty, then he threw his shield aside and stormed forward, passing the enemy he took out with Snaga and retake his axe. The remaining wolf inserted a new magazine in his bolter, and opened fire, but Druss was already too close. The deadly warrior gripped his axe with both hands and leapt off the ground raising his axe high above his head. He felt the bolter rounds on his armor as mere stings, but his enemy felt the sheer might of Snaga as it hit his helmet and cut as easy through his body as a hot knife would through butter. Blood sprayed all over the place and Druss suddenly remembered what the sound was….It was the sound of war….Bolter rounds exploding, chainswords singing.

 

…

Druss smashed his enemies face with his power fist, laughing. The Wardens lost about half their numbers, as the first orbital bombardment was orchestrated. The other half tried to fend of the advancing wolves. They weren’t sent to rescue them, they were sent to destroy them. Their own brother legions attacked them. It was not the Xenos who backstabbed them, but the very Imperium they fought for. They had fought for three days, there numbers dwindling, but they stood ground.

For every warden that fell, the wolves had to pay the price in blood.

 

As Druss had led the counterattack, he saw the wolves’ primarch leman Russ and their father Gwalchavad fight in the distance. There the Wolves and Wardens ignored the battle which drew on with deadly force all around them. Druss had tried to fight his way through, but was swept away by a massed assault of wolves.

 

Now he was fighting on the other end of the battlefield. He remembered, those lines of wardens, standing at his father’s side. He remembered that he saw Guiare Amalasan among them….

…he remembered….the gaze on Guaires face….he remembered Guaire shaking his head….he remembered him putting on his helmet…he remembered him turning away…..He knew…..Druss realized….He knew what would happen…Druss was horrified upon that realisation. He stopped crushing his enemies face. He looked down,…where once a proud Astartes head was, was now an undefinable mass of red tissue….Druss rised…the thought hammering into his mind….he knew…he stumbled to his feet.

 

…The Blood Claw saw the big warrior who has defeated his sergeant. He was terrified as the big golden warrior let down a rain of punches upon his face. He couldn’t move, but the big warrior didn’t stop. He threw punch after punch, but the young Bloodclaw realized, that the big warrior was absent. Sometimes the elder wolves warned the young aspirants, that you could be drawn so deep in a battle frenzy, that you didn’t realize, what happens anymore.

 

The Bloodclaw slowly approached the big warrior, raised his chainsword and struck for his side, but the big warrior moved as the Bloodclaw struck and the chainsword went into the big warrior’s leg. Cutting it off. The golden warrior cried out loud, slashing uncoordinated into the Bloodclaws direction while he fell, the blood claw jumped back, evading the strike, and hacking off his opponent’s arm. And sinking the teeth of his chainsword with a fluid motion into the side, pulling the Bloodclaw with him.

 

Druss didn’t felt the pain as he lay there, his life blood fleeing from him, the young wolf atop his chest. The world turned grey, and his sight faded, but he could only think of this one thought…..HE KNEW!!! And then Druss the Blademaster of the Wardens of Light, the Death Wanderer, wandered among the death as one of their own.

 

The Bloodclaw stumbled to his feet. The light was gone from the eyes of the golden warrior. He tried to free his Chainsword, but wasn’t able jug it free. So he took the big man’s axe. And went into battle again.

 

…

 

Gwalchavad breathed heavily. He was barely able to counter the attacks from Leman Russ. He bled from multiple wounds, his armor was heavily damaged, but so was Lemans. A big gap was opened across the Wolfing’s chest.

 

Heavy rain splashed on the ground, lightning tore the heaven apart. And the two primarchs fought for their lives.

 

Edited January 20, 2016 by MikhalLeNoir

[Mechanist]

A good read, though your right there are a few errors in there, nothing serious that I can spot, run it though a spell checker and then a search replace should sort them out , I'm guessing English is not your first language?

 

Wolf is the singular and Wolves the plural

Energy fist is called a Power Fist.

 

Fell his foes > felled 

As he brought dead > death

taste oft he air > of the

focused only on the enemy in front of each other. >a bit awkward wording maybe just cut the "of each other."

that there other voices among their ranks > that there were

The Astartes oft he Wardens > of the

Druss was knocked unsconcius > unconscious

Everywhere lied the broken > lay the

And he stood up, he realized, that his left leg hurt. As he looked down, he saw that Snaga has bitten him >  As he stood up he realized his left leg hurt, looking down he saw that Snaga had bitten him.  < To be honest that whole paragraph has a few to many full stops and is a little awkward.

 

That should get you started, I should probably do some work as well. 

Overall I enjoyed reading and for a surreptitious fluff writing session it's a great 1st draft. 

 

Last one from me for now.

Bleeded should be Bled at the end.

[MikhalLeNoir]

Merci beaucoup
. I will update the text with your corrections asap.

And no, english is only my second language and it has been years since i wrote essays.

And thx for the kind works. Just had a flash and couldn't stop ignoring my teacher

 

 

Update: I updated the stroy, cleansed it from most of the errors (lol, i had autocorrect in german on). and worked a bit on the flow. Hope we can improve the story more

Edited November 6, 2015 by MikhalLeNoir

[MikhalLeNoir]

Thx to Big Bad Squig, a revised version of my story. Thx mate. CC welcomed. Because it is so long, I hide it

Hidden Content

 

The End of Light Part 2

 

Heavy rain poured from the heavens. The thud of water hitting the ground echoed the sound of bolter rounds impacting the armour of his brothers, dead or alive.

 

Arngrim hacked one Space Wolf’s head from his neck and crushed the chest of another with his power fist. Swinging, slashing, evading and countering. The battle was like a dance and Arngrim followed its deadly rhythm. Other Wardens died around him, but he was no ordinary Warden. He was the Blademaster, and he welcomed the rage, a rage that overtook him as he fought his way through the enemy ranks.

 

As he felled more and more of his foes, he felt like a god of old. He felt the most alive he had ever been bringing death. The colours were more vivid, the taste of the air stronger. He even could smell the blood of his fallen brothers on the wind.

 

A Space Wolf sergeant approached Arngrim, swinging with an enormous sword for his head. Arngrim parried the attack and answered with a deadly riposte, but his enemy evaded the strike. Both circled around each other. Even as the Wardens of Light and Space Wolves clashed against each other like waves against a cliff, the two adversaries were lost in their own world, ignoring the storm of battle around them.

 

Arngrim swung his battle-axe Agony in a murderous arc, but the wolf anticipated the move and darted back, preparing himself to counterattack. Arngrim stopped with his movement half way through and leapt with the flat side of Agony forward, crashing into his enemy and knocking him from his. He jumped atop him, pinning him to the ground and landing a heavy blow with his power fist on his enemy’s visor, smashing through his jaw and shattering his head. The rain still splashing down in its bleak rhythm.

 

As he sat there, on top of his defeated enemy, he laughed at the situation. How had it come so far?

 

…

 

Again they befriended an enemy; making peace with Xenos, where there should have been war. The former Apostles grew uneasy. Since they had been reunited, they were more and more absent from the glory of battle. Now that they were Wardens of Light, their Primarch set them on a course of peace. Arngrim Valten knew that this was not what the Emperor wanted, yet he followed his father. But he knew that there other, less obedient views amongst their ranks. Not spoken openly; more a surreptitious whisper. First the whispers were barely heard, but as the Great Crusade dragged on, and Gwalchavad choose to fight only as a last resort, the whispers grew louder and spread through the ranks of the Wardens. Gwalchavad dismissed them and, after the Emperor agreed to include the Xenos of Norsgot in his Imperium, the whispers suddenly subsided.

 

They awaited Malcador and his personal guard, to escort them to the capital. The Astartes of the Wardens lined up as honour guard and were only equipped with light weaponry as they were a symbol for peace. Gwalchavad, along with Mikhal the Scorpion and his Luth de Oganach stood beside the Sigillite and the Xenos leaders. It should have been a time of joy, but Arngrim felt something. A tickle on the back of his neck, as if something was about to happen, something significant. Then, it disappeared. He stood there, weighing Agony in his hand and caressing the axe, which was at his side long before he underwent the painful transformation to become an Astartes. Back on Terra he was only a whelp, not knowing the real thrill of war.

 

He looked around, observing his brothers. The ones from Caerbannog, mostly free of emotions, as they accepted the gift of their father, and his Terran brothers, the former Apostles of War. It was as if he should have noticed something, but like the tickle on the neck, he couldn’t grasp the thought. Arngrim’s gaze flew over his brothers, and then it stopped, boring into the eyes of their former leader. The one who had stood at the head of the Apostles, long before their father was found. Guaire Amalasan was a handsome man, with long white hair not formed into a braid or dreads as was custom among the Caerbannog Wardens, but instead flowing over his shoulders. His grey eyes stared back at Arngrim. And then, Arngrim Valten knew. He made a step forward, but Guaire slowly shook his head, put his helmet on and turning around.

 

Then fire rained from the sky. Warden bodies were blasted through the air, torn apart like puppets in the hand of a child. Arngrim was knocked unconscious as something close to him exploded and smashed him against a building.

 

…

 

When he awoke, the sky was burning. He saw colossal ships tumbling down onto the planet’s surface. It rained fire and water. An apocalyptic sight. Everywhere lay the broken bodies of his brothers and the xenos population. Their bodies in grotesque poses, flesh burned off them. Arngrim wasn’t sure what has happened. How long he was knocked out for? Who was responsible for this mess? Had the xenos backstabbed them? Was it a trap to capture the Sigillite? His head throbbed. He should start to wear a helmet, Arngrim thought. Pain ran through his leg and he realized that Agony was stuck in his leg. Always eager for blood my love, he thought. With a sudden move, he tore the axe free. He examined the wound. It was not deep; his armour plate absorbed most of the impact. He rose and looked for other survivors. He came across only more dead wardens, but there were not as many dead as there should have been, if he were the only survivor.

 

In the distance Arngrim heard something. It seemed familiar, but he couldn’t remember what it was. Then three grey-armoured marines appeared before him. They must have been Space Wolves, possibly sent here to rescue them. Had he been unconscious for so long that a rescue team was already here? He waved and yelled. The three wolves came close… Closer… All of a sudden, they opened fire. Arngrim was only saved by his reflexes as he threw himself to the side and used Agony to deflect the bolt rounds. He rushed behind a wall. He didn’t know what was going on, or why the wolves would attack him, but he had no time to think. They were here to kill him, and in order to survive, he had to kill them first. He took a moment to look over the wall. They swarmed out, trying to outflank him and attack from different sides. If they did, he wouldn’t have a chance, so he attacked first. Throwing Agony in the chest of the middle one and engaging the marine to his left, crushing into him with his shoulder. Arngrim grabbed his enemies head with his power fist and whirled around. The third wolf fired round after round into the body of his comrade, which Arngrim was using as human shield. Arngrim waited until his shield was perforated and the magazine of his enemy was empty, then threw his shield aside and stormed forward, passing the enemy he had slain with Agony. He reclaimed his axe. The remaining wolf inserted a new magazine in his bolter, and opened fire, but Arngrim was already too close. The deadly warrior gripped his axe with both hands and leapt off the ground, raising his axe high above his head. He felt the bolter rounds on his armour as mere stings, but his enemy felt the sheer might of Agony as it hit his helmet and cut as easily through his body as a hot knife would through butter. Blood sprayed everywhere and Arngrim suddenly remembered what the sound was. It was the sound of war. Bolter rounds exploding. Chainswords singing.

 

…

 

Arngrim smashed his fist into the head of his enemy, laughing. The Wardens had lost about half their numbers, as the first orbital bombardment was orchestrated. The other half tried to fend off the advancing wolves not sent to rescue them, but to destroy them. Their own brother legions had attacked them. It was not the xenos who had backstabbed them, but the very Imperium they fought for. They had fought for three days, their numbers dwindling slowly, but they stood their ground.

For every Warden that fell, the Wolves had to pay the price in blood.

 

As Arngrim led the counterattack, he had seen the Wolves’ Primarch Leman Russ and his father Gwalchavad fight in the distance. There the Wolves and Wardens ignored the battle which drew on with deadly force all around them. Arngrim had tried to fight his way through, but was swept away by a massed assault of wolves.

 

Now he was fighting on the other end of the battlefield. He remembered those lines of Wardens, standing at his father’s side. He remembered that he saw Guiare Amalasan among them … he remembered ... the expression on Guaire’s face … he remembered Guaire shaking his head … he remembered him putting on his helmet…he remembered him turning away… He had known, Arngrim realized… He had known what would happen… Arngrim was horrified upon the realisation. He stopped crushing his enemy’s face. He looked down; where once a proud Astartes’ head was, there was now an undefinable mass of red tissue … Arngrim rose … the thought hammering into his mind … he knew… he stumbled to his feet.

 

The Blood Claw saw the huge warrior, still dripping with the blood of his sergeant. Terror set in as the Warden let down a rain of punches upon the dead man’s mangled face. He couldn’t move, but the warrior didn’t stop. He threw punch after punch, and the young Blood Claw realized that the Warden was absent. Oftentimes the elder wolves warned the young aspirants that one could be drawn so deep into the frenzy of battle that they would not be able to perceive their surroundings.

 

The Blood Claw slowly approached the warrior, raising his chainsword and striking for his side, but his opponent moved as the Blood Claw struck and the chainsword tore into his leg, cutting it off. The golden-armoured warrior cried out, slashing uncoordinatedly in the Blood Claw’s direction while he fell. The young wolf jumped back, evading the strike, and hacking off his opponent’s arm and sinking the teeth of his chainsword with a fluid motion into his side.

 

Arngrim didn’t feel the pain as he lay there, life flowing from him, the wolf atop his chest. The world turned grey, and his sight faded, but he could only think one thought … he had known. And then Arngrim Valten, Blademaster of the Wardens of Light, Death Wanderer, wandered among the dead as one of their own.

 

The Blood Claw stumbled to his feet. The light was gone from the eyes of the golden warrior. He tried to free his chainsword, but wasn’t able to, instead reaching down to take the dead man’s axe. And with that, he went into battle again.

 

…

 

Gwalchavad exhaled heavily. He was barely able to counter the attacks from Russ as he bled from multiple wounds. His armour was heavily damaged, but so was Leman’s.; a huge gash opened across the Wolf King’s chest.

 

Heavy rain poured from the heavens. Lightning tore the sky apart. And the two Primarchs fought for their very lives.

 

Edited January 20, 2016 by MikhalLeNoir