Index Traitoris: The Sunder

[WarriorFish]

The Sundering Call

note: this is currently placeholders and outdated content from previous smatterings of lore and bits, some more comprehensive and complete versions will be added in time so please bear with me!

14/09/2019: Character titles, Zhang's background, geneseed first draft, Chaos icons added as dividers

18/09/2019: Beliefs first draft, appearance added with first draft, alternating melon/white headings added

27/10/2019: Warband symbol added

Origins

The Swords of Victory were once a paragon of heroism; a chapter of no small accomplishment. Heroic and selfless, winning countless great victories over every foe imaginable their deeds in battle were matched by their grace and humility in peace. Staying to help not only rebuild but also improve life once the battle was won they were beloved by all who knew them and lauded among the greatest of heroes. While strategic commanders could only voice in private their displeasure at the limited number of battles they would fight none could doubt the results of their actions and the spectacular victories they provided.

It is without surprise that the grateful peoples would want to honour their saviours; statues would be raised for their victories and songs written to praise their name. Over time the Swords did come to appreciate these acts of thanks but this would be the seed that would eventually result in their fall. For what once started as acknowledgement of gratitude did then become appreciation and finally expectation of the adulation they received. In time this devotion would become more important than the victory that earned it.

The Swords always has a grace about them in appearance and action, squads and brothers would compete for glory but this took a more sinister aspect once their attitude to victory changed. It was no longer about friendly rivalry and skill and become a direct competition regardless of the consequences. What was once battles won in the most efficient way to preserve life became a race to see who could take the most. Ironically this fervent desire to be better and more impressive only lead to lightning quick victories that gave Imperial commanders the fast victories they craved, without care for how it came about. The name of the Swords became praised to new heights but it was not enough.

Surely it was time for them to be proclaimed the greatest of all, as is clearly proper? Surely this was only fair? Not only did they prosecute campaigns in less time than others but they did so with grace that other brutish chapters could never hope to achieve. Such greatness must be rewarded and so it became, but through the attention of Slaanesh. It was not just the Prince of Excess who noticed the Swords though, but also the glaring eye of the Inquisition that turned upon them...

Perhaps foreseeing what may be the Holy Inquisition of the Emperor deemed the Swords needed to be brought to account for their actions. The Sword's Chapter Master was indignant and sent their representatives away with no small threats should they return, but it was a ruse and distraction letting spies report far more than the Sword's inhospitality to their master. Without delay a fleet is assembled to enforce the Inquisition's will; regiments of the Guard are joined by Sisters of the Sacred Rose and 6 companies of the Legio Venator Space Marines - headed by the Inquisitor Lord himself and his personal retainers.

The Sundering Sword

The Swords are incandescent with rage that anyone would presume to hold sway over their domain and challenge their authority like this. Their fall is complete when they turn their guns on the Imperium without responding to hails. The people of their home world rushed to the defence of their heroes, sacrificing themselves without thought in any way they could. The corruption of Slaanesh became ever more apparent as the Imperial forces pressed onwards finding every man, woman and child they meet a belligerent foe that must be slain. Before long the taint of Chaos is clear and the Emperor's warriors fight ever harder as the planet is drenched blood for every inch.

Despite their skill at battle - and their opinion of such - it was a battle impossible for the Swords to win once the Eldar mysteriously appeared to aid the attackers. Whether joining to fight the mutual foe of Chaos or to repay one of the many bloody victories the Swords had gained over the Eldar it sent the scales of battle crashing against them. The Inquisitor had chosen his forces well, what's more displayed an unusual flair for strategy; the forces at his command were grim and determined, resisting the powers of Chaos and resolute in executing the Emperor's will no matter what. Every sally by the Swords was pushed back with righteous faith and fire power - the unthinkable was happening and the Swords of Victory were losing, and losing badly.

The rage of their Chapter Master at admitting defeat was said to have been terrible to behold and the survivors fled to the warp, leaving their world and its people to the cleansing fire of the Imperium - and taking their souls to Slaanesh. None of the survivors talk of their previous life, the shame of their first defeat burns brightly even to this day. That the Inquisitor declared this result a great success perhaps suggests some greater threat to the Imperium was avoided but the truth can never be known.

While the Sunder may well cast aside this part of their history the Imperium has not forgotten; it is widely known that the forces of the Emperor involved in the initial crusade are all too eager to catch up with them once more to finish what they started...

Home World

Nomads of Perfection

Once resolute and firmly secure in their home world, the Sunder left their world and it's people when their fall to Slaanesh was complete. Never to return or even cast a thought to these people who adored them more than life itself, not even as a vengeful Imperium put it to the sword.

(fleet based)

Recruitment

Combat Doctrine

The Sunder carry out war in much the same manner in which they did before their fall. Primarily infantry based their skill at war is such that the Marines themselves will always be their greatest asset, so they generally don't make a large use of vehicles aside from transportation. The war band is strictly controlled in appearances - colours in particular being something Yjun is most keen on. Outside of the war band's colours (the pink for Slaanesh, the white from their former livery) squads make use of a colour and mark their armour in various ways to bind them to their squad brothers. Outside of that further variation is forbidden and individuals customise their armour to their own desires to state their presences.

The war band's attitude to most other things is set predominantly to individual Marine's preferences. Some despise mutation and consider it ugly; others desire it. Some have forged ornate and decorated armour; others stand plain aside from the Praefactor's colours. Beauty comes in many forms and it is next to impossible to get such a group of individuals to agree on anything consistently. Others would have surely fractured under such strain but fortunately the Call follow those with the greatest skill and the closest to perfection. Each following planning to learn, steal and eventually replace him but yet standing together with his fellow lessers in doing so. It is fitting that the Sunder make no sense to outsiders as they would have it no other way!

Organisation

Beliefs

The beliefs of the Sunder take various forms; and not always coherent ones, at least on the surface. They readily speak down to any they consider their inferior (which is pretty much everyone), but will be courteous to those that they bear some respect towards - or more commonly those who have a use to the Sunder. To the Sunder worthiness is one of the true aspirations for all life; the problem is that for each Marine you'd ask you'd likely get a different answer as to in which regard.

That is besides something they can all agree on in martial might, for what is a Marines if not an instrument of war? Fervent competition is normal with Marines always seeking to one up others and they're not above discrete ways to inhibit rivals (though woe to anyone caught doing so, for the Praefactor does not tolerate waste of his resources...). Diligent training and tournaments are common when not engaged in other activities such as worship, the less pious taking to the field more often or usually entertaining their own wants and/or needs. The battlefield is also a place for worship after all.

Where others could be fractured by the competition it is not so for the Sunder, beholden as they all are to the Praefactor's absolute will. To some he is an object of adulation to be followed or perhaps imitated; others quietly scheme to surpass him one day to take his place and some, usually the eldest, adhere as the old hierarchy dictates - but all follow. This unity gives the Sunder great strength and while they would not admit it is no small part of their success.

This cohesion is only so far as he leads adequately - the facade of perfection must be maintained at all times lest he be ritually challenged to duel for the leadership. This brutal system helps keep the Sunder strong as much as united, for the weak could never hope to prevail and the Sunder would never follow the weak. Absolute power comes with downsides accordingly, as to lead you must put no foot wrong - as an ancient Terran saying goes "a crown does not make a king".

Appearance

Being prideful creatures they usually take a dim view of mutation, and tend to consider those spending more time in the warp to be idling around at best, but some more zealous Marines are more favourable to gifts from their patron even if few in number. Appearances count for much and while all will stick to the colours decreed by their master (the white and gold their former livery, the off-pink a tribute to their god) they will take care of their armour and wargear further than the need to rely on them to survive.

Wearing more older/original armour is a testament to your skill, either as an older member of the warband or being capable of taking them, so are highly sought after - in particular MkIV Maximus pattern armour that once proudly bore the white and gold are common, as the Chapter had them in good supply. Choice is not often available for a roving warband as much as they may trade and steal, so most Marines wear armour from several sources including former Chaos Marine allies (or even pillaged from battlefields!).

Geneseed

Prior to their fall the Swords followed their Ultramarine primogenitor ways closely, using the Codex Astartes to further their ways of war and bring greater glory. Despite this they always remained aloof from their cousins, even the Ultramarines themselves, and didn't interact with them in any particular way different to how they worked with any other Chapters.

Even without any closeness their turn to Slaanesh is considered a stain to be removed by their former peers, for the affront to their gene-heritage is compounded by the mockery of the Codex itself. Aside from the Sunder's open disdain for it the fact that their organisational structures and methodologies match their loyal ways so closely is an insult just as unforgivable. Of this hypocrisy the Sunder apparently show no acknowledgement, whether intentional or not.

Notable Characters

Praefactor Yjun

Master of the Toll, Keeper of Oaths, Scion of Perfection

Not much is known about Yjun though it is anyone's guess if this is intentional or not. Having ruled supreme over the Sunder for living memory some claim that he was the original Swords of Victory's Chapter Master, others that it is a persona adopted by each Praefactor. Whatever the truth is seems to matter little, for Yjun has lead the Call in a manner they appear to find satisfactory enough as it is claimed he has never fought a duel for leadership. Yjun is highly talented combatant and masterful strategist that would surprise those expecting the Sunder to be more interesting in sating their desires - the Praefactor reigns supreme in all things and his word is law. That is assuming he deigns to fight at all for the Sunder consider no battle preferable to a disappointing one. There are other ways to be entertained after all.

It may be Yjun's greatest gift is his diplomacy and silver tongue. There appears to be little he doesn't know, and powerful figures are lining up to pay for the Sunder's services despite their reputation. Perhaps there is more to him than meets the eye, perhaps his fickle and contradictory nature has a greater goal in mind? If so it is a mystery that will remain so until he decides otherwise.

Ijax "the Silent"

Master of Books, Warpsighter
The psyker Ijax is somewhat of a mystery even to Veterans of the war band. He never speaks instead communication through a Daemonette who always accompanies him. Whether this is because he considers talking to others beneath him or signifies a more malignant relationship nobody knows. Not much thought is generally given to him as most are too busy with their own affairs even if a powerful psyker to aid in war is always useful, and to make things better he's seldom seen outside of battle. What he does in this time none can say for sure but it is usually assuming that he is busy researching and using the powers of the warp to find worthy foes or potential employers with useful trades to be made. Few even claim he uses his power not to find strong foes, but rather avoid them for it is said he was once the Chief Librarian and has foreseen the Call's destruction should their final foes as the Swords of Victory catch them again...

Zhang the Lion
Venerable Ancient, Earl of the Kindred

Though the chapter armoury of the Sunder was mostly lost when they fled to the warp, this was not the case for the 1st Company that had split from the main forces after the glorious victory on Lilaethan. Aside from forming much needed reinforcements and uniting the survivors this also meant the chapter's greatest warriors still lived and foremost amongst them were the Dreadnoughts of the 1st Company.

Of these heroes Zhang stands proudly alongside the best and greatest, earning the name of the lion during his tenure in the 4th Company as an Assault Marine due to his unblemished valour and skill. Suffering his first death during one of the many battles against the Eldar he holds a special hatred of their kind, and was said to be an active part of the Sunder's gradual service to the Dark Prince.

Where other renegade and traitor Dreadnoughts are maltreated this is not so for the Sunder, in one of the many manners they retain their old ways. It was Zhang himself that discovered he could renew and retain his senses by bloodshed, keeping him as active as when first interred - Dreadnoughts that spill enough in tribute to Slaanesh even find boons in reward. So in battle is Zhang more deadly and powerful than ever before as terrified foes see the damage they inflict undone as he rips all before him to pieces.

While this can result in the Dreadnoughts being more bloodthirsty than their commanders may wish, their unstoppable onslaught is always worth the risk so the Sunder are ever keeping an eye out for a new chassis to take...

Notable Events

The Sundering of Lilaethan

Arguably their greatest of victories - their last when they were still loyal to the Imperium - The Sundering of Lilaethan was such an epic battle that it would forever shape the Sunder, giving them their name once they fell to Chaos and an eternal foe in the Eldar. It was the name given to a decisive battle to save a young Imperial colony on an Eldar maiden world from the vengeful xenos, the moment the aliens were at the apex of their strategy the Swords of Victory struck with speed and ferocity that seemed all but impossible to the beleaguered Imperial defenders. History records would - before their expunging - declare that the Swords attacked with such a mastery of war that the Eldar had no choice but to focus on them, saving the PDF force. Of course the truth was far from it as the Swords had no intention of saving lives by drawing the attention of the enemy, but given the choice the Eldar knew who the true and greatest foe was even if the Imperium was yet to understand.

It mattered little in the end, the full strength of the Chapter slaughtered them to the last and as the Swords left behind exuberant celebration their Chief Librarian ordered the fleet back to their home world with the plundered soul stones. The fate of these Eldar stones is unknown as the Swords were visited by the Inquisition and their allies shortly after returning...

Battle Cry

None; though the Swords of Victory were once known for their war cry of "First to victory", which the Sunder darkly mirror in action rather than words.

[Brother Lunkhead]

You're off to a great start with this one Brother

 

I'm curious as to what specifically drew the attention of the Inquisition and make them suspect the chapter of corruption and finally bring the full force of the Imperium down on them. Did they show outward signs of taint, or leave evidence at the site of their victories? Perhaps the were involved in strange rituals of excess.

 

Looking forward to seeing more from the Sundering Call

[WarriorFish]

Thanks! That's something that is somewhat alluded to in other scattered lore, the short version is the Inquisitor Lord [REDACTED] has meddling hands in all my armies I've not fleshed it out in detail, but aside from plentiful spies and allies he also uses the power of the warp to aid his plans. Could be that he sees what is to come and tries to stop it, but this requires forcing them to Slaanesh "early". As to what greater threat he avoids doing this... not sure I like the idea that the Sunder are too far gone, or perhaps it was fated to be so this might have been his only option. I think it might be better to leave it unanswered though, rather than read like a bad BL book

 

There's sprinklings of Tzeentch to be had too, so much to play with I need to return to their turning, had the idea that the original chapter master of the Swords is the Daemon Prince, ascended with the sacrifice of the plundered soul stones. That leaves the question of who Yjun is. Likely captain of the Kindred (first company), as that's how he assumed command for himself (this bit of lore still needs transplanting from my WIP).

 

Generally the theme of the Sunder is an excess of martial pride that would make even Slaanesh blush, it's good fun doing a bunch of irredeemably self-absorbed villains (especially as a contrast to my loyalist armies)! The twist is that they really are highly skilled but this just makes them even more arrogant for it

 

Anyway, there's still more snippets of background I need to collate and filter in then I can rework what I have to polish and update it The current bits are just pasted in wholesale to the closest appropriate heading for starters...

[WarriorFish]

Done a bit more; copied the character titles in and added in Zhang and the geneseed first drafts :tu:

[Brother Lunkhead]

Thanks for the extrapolation. I suppose the original chapter master ascending to daemon-hood is a dead giveaway that things are not quite right I have this picture in my head of him being caught raiding the soul stone repository...."He turns in the direction of the unexpected witness and with a mouth full of soul stones mutters 'oops' and winks out of the universe and into the realm of the warp." Sort of like catching your four year old raiding the frig in the middle of the night

 

Inquisitor Lord [REDACTED] sounds like an interesting character too. No doubt a radical and maybe an agent of Chaos himself? Hmmm..... very intriguing.

 

I still think you need to expand on the events that lead the Swords to Chaos. If for no other reason that I'm sure it will be a good read Keep up the good work, this just keeps getting better

[WarriorFish]

The Inquisitor Lord is very interesting indeed but he's not really a radical, or in league with Chaos. His power is such that it extends to the B&C itself, as whenever I type out his name "[REDACTED]" it gets turned into "[REDACTED]"... but this isn't his article and he always takes a background role I'll come back to the CM idea, if nothing else leaving it as a bit of a question mark is fine - maybe it's Yjun maybe it's not? Not everything needs an answer :)

 

All of the current bits are stand alone which is why they don't delve too deeply into anything but this will need to change once I've copied all the existing bits in. So further than what is written I haven't yet sorted out how they go to Chaos proper. Obviously the fight against the Imperial forces is what completes it, but other than the gradual change as they get more self-absorbed and prideful I'm missing the part where it turns Chaosy.

 

I don't want anything too cliché like a possessed artefact or similar, I was thinking that perhaps Slaanesh sends some emissaries and the Swords willingly partake of the bargain. After all, a chapter so full of themselves wouldn't be tricked into anything that didn't appease them Probably part of their desire for recognition; Slaanesh asks serve me, be rewarded, and see yourselves known by all as the greatest! A deal they'd find most pleasing...

 

No rush on anything yet, still plenty to transfer over first :) Off the top of my head; the Kindred and Faith Takers, a handful of little story bits (might not make the cut to prevent bloat), their mercenary ways...

[Knight of the Raven]

I love, love, love that the survivors from the crusade that sundered the Swords of Victory keep tracking them down. It's wonderful to see someone not dismiss a defeated threat as "meh, not my problem anymore." And it takes some serious mettle for an Imperial Guard regiment of all things to personally hunt down chaos space marines led by a daemon prince.

About the Sunder themselves, I feel there's a severe disconnect.

They come to expect mortals to worship the ground they walk on, without even passing the "Where's my gratitude!?" stage apparently. But that theme vanishes very soon; it evolves into a competition for victory for victory's sake as soon as the next paragraph. Or perhaps for bragging rights, but certainly not for the adulation of the masses, who incidentally are only mentioned again when they throw themselves at the Inquisitor's coalition with their masters' name on their frothing lips, without a word of description about what these same masters thought about that.

Then "beauty comes in many forms" gets involved. That fits Slaanesh's themes, but I felt it came out of nowhere. The Sunder are also as obsessed with perfection as can be expected of his/her followers, but I don't really get the feeling of "an excess of martial pride that would make even Slaanesh blush" when I read the article.

At least, not after they fall to Chaos. The Swords of Victory certainly have an inflated sense of self-importance, whether about their actual significance in both Imperial history and the grand scheme of things or about the actual importance of something like grace versus brutishness when the only thing that matters regarding space marines is that they prosecute humanity's wars.

The Sundering of Lilaethan speaks of the Eldar changing their plans to focus on the biggest threat. I can easily imagine the Swords of Victory's precious little huge ego being nastily bruised if their enemies ignored them to deal with someone else on the same battlefield or in the same warzone, because they were the biggest threat... I'd call it delicious even, and it does give an opportunity for the Sunder to hunt down the guilty chapter/order/knight house/whatever to the ends of the galaxy.

About what could have possibly tipped off the Inquisition. The chapter was for all intents and purposes paragons of virtues on par with the most admirable paladins of Dungeons & Dragons, then their personality took a turn so sharp, it's a miracle the Swords of Victories didn't all die from whiplash. And their homeworld turned into a monument to the glorious magnificence that is they, the God-Emperor's gift to the human species.

Yeah. Any inquisitor worth their salt will see the writing on the wall from across the galaxy and go "damn, not this again."

[WarriorFish]

The current bits are transplanted pretty much without change from other smaller pieces here and there but fear not they will get expanded upon and fleshed out to a more fitting standard once I have more first drafts in It may take a few goes to get there though, but all journeys start somewhere!

 

I like that despite this it's already clear that the Sunder are very much strutting peacocks Did I mention they're also massive hypocrites? I promise there will be no moustache twiddling (except maybe by Tzeentch?)

[WarriorFish]

I've added an appearances heading along with a first draft of beliefs. It's taking longer than I had hoped, but it's better to get something in to start with and come back to refine and change - easier to remove than add right? I'm sticking to the plan of getting something in for every header before looking to move/merge/change/etc but I can't guarantee that when there's only one or two left as currently it depends on what I feel like adding

 

I do feel like good progress is being made overall, as I'm getting ideas for things I want to do with the existing drafts

[Knight of the Raven]

edit: rereading this post, it's nothing but criticism for criticism's sake. Apologies.

[WarriorFish]

I'm not sure what you're expecting here, but it's a work in progress for a reason :P

[Dosjetka]

I'm a little confused by your latest post, KotR. It isn't clear what criticism you're trying to convey and, frankly, could come across as you being a tad rude. I'm pretty sure that's not the intent but if you could provide some clarity for folks following this thread (especially for the IT author), that'd be great.

[Brother Cambrius]

I echo Dos on that one KotR, if your attempts in your response were to be amusedly sarcastic or facetious, they fell very wide of the mark and look very condescending and mocking from my eye. 

 

Onto some feedback on these self important, perfectionist victory hunters. :D

 

First of all, I really dig the colour scheme and its uniqueness in being ordered despite the wild desires oft found in Slaaneshi warbands. The whole appearance differences in armour customisation for each marine and their unique squad markings really work well in reflecting organised chaos. :D

 

In terms of their name, I may have missed it, but where did the name of The Sunder originate?

 

How did their Chapter Master come to communicate and link with Slaanesh as well? Was it a whisper or a mental emissary or something more profound and hidden away?

 

In terms of recent history as well with the splitting of the Imperium and Chaos' increased strength and prosecution of their wars etc, have the Sunder gone on a wild crusade of perfect and victorious vengeance?

 

I hope you do work on this more and grow it out to be a fine IT article, WarriorFish. Whoever gets your Warband for the Swap itself will have some potential conversion fun.

 

Cambrius

[WarriorFish]

I'm a bit short on time currently, some more pressing things to see to but I've not had much writing juices to expend either. The name comes from their final battle as loyalists "The Sundering of Lilaethan" - the call is that of Slaanesh Though this would only be the last on a technicality as they would have stopped serving the Imperium's needs directly before then, but they were at least keeping a pretension of loyalty.

 

I need to go into the Slaanesh part in detail, but the idea is by degrees as such things normally are with Chaos. There's the potential for corruption in anything, which is why the Imperium is so "enthusiastic" on preserving purity, as the Chaos gods are fed by anything appropriate for example Khorne cares not from where the blood flows... So for Slaanesh they were already in the right "area" with their hubris and preoccupation with skill, and things snowball especially when Slaanesh worship is directly involved.

 

So aside from the creeping nature of corruption I need the point where Slaanesh is introduced proper, I'm pondering the Chief Librarian but feels too obvious. Perhaps it can come from more mundane ways, as a way of claiming an edge some turn to drugs which results in more following to compete and then you get introduced to who may be supplying them and maybe they have some interesting friends...

 

I also need to work in Cultists, as originally the army was never going to have any so there's nothing about them. All until the Escher came out and I knew it was a gift from Slaanesh I've got an idea or two on that but first things first is ensure I get enough together to complete the LASC challenge

[Arkaniss]

Drugs or something would be a better way, as you say a Chief Librarian falling first to take the rest of the chapter with them is a bit old hat. If you could add a variation that would be neat.

 

I have a idea for the cultists though - the citizens who worshipped them (and fought for them) could easily become a militia of sorts who they keep around. Maybe they had their own fall or were influenced and taken down along with the Sunder? Perhaps it's best to concentrate on the Sunder themselves first, who knows the cultists may find their own way into the fluff as you write it

[WarriorFish]

It could be a good change that the corruption starts in the rank and file that spreads upwards as it gains momentum The more I think about the drug angle the more I like it, makes me think of the old Emperor's Children special detachment thing I never got to try because the Legions book lasted all of five minutes...

 

While they very much left their home world to the consequences there would surely be a lot of other worlds previously saved by the Swords who could fall under the sway of the Sunder, as they pretend to be loyal (as any villain worth their salt must surely do?). Could be a good angle to explore as they return to previous battles to sow corruption and/or claim vital resources, also gaining breathing space from the Imperium as they must divert resources to tackle these problems.

 

Probably something that will come together somewhat along with other bits as you say, plus I don't imagine the Sunder would be best pleased if I spent time on the chattel when there's more on them to be doing Plus the immediate goal is the LASC challenge first stage which I think I'm about there on for the basic criteria, I need to work on their symbol for the final piece.

 

I do have an idea for the symbol, and did from the start so it's long overdue I got round to it

[WarriorFish]

I've crafted a first draft for the symbol:

I think it works, but I'm not sure on the angle. It fits for the Slaanesh symbol (which always appears to point to the upper right) but perhaps less so for an emblem, and a sword one at that (as it will go on the left shoulder). Maybe it's not that much of a deal, given that Slaanesh should be the priority and I've never seen it at any other angle.

[Bjorn Firewalker]

I like the symbol design. It may look better if it had a proper pommel, i.e., put a colored orb between the claws.

[WarriorFish]

That would be cool, especially if it were a gem of some kind but alas I have my average skills to consider :lol: I'd probably go for some custom transfers but either way the scale will probably mean there's not much room to work with.

[Ace Debonair]

This is quite the interesting Warband!

 

I've got one bit of C&C to offer - please don't interpret this as anything other than a suggestion to help improve your Warband. If I sound like I'm being overly critical, that's just because I'm a veteran of the Old Liber and old habits die hard.  As an addendum, anything I say can be comfortably ignored - they're simply suggestions and nothing more!

 

So: the thing that leapt out at me is that there's no explanation of the name change from "Swords of Victory" to "Sundering Call". They're suddenly referred to as "The Sunder" at the very end of the Origins section without anything to suggest why.

 

A Chapter as proud as the Swords of Victory changing their name would be a rare and - at least to the Chapter itself - very important event, surely worthy of mention. It might well be worth expanding on how the Swords shed their old identity so completely.

 

Additionally, throughout the article, you refer to the Warband as both "The Sunder" and "The Call". The actual name of the Warband doesn't show up anywhere in the article, save for at the very top. As a first-time reader, I found myself scrolling back through bits I'd already read to see if "The Sunder" and "The Call" were different sub-factions that I'd somehow missed the explanations for.

 

Aside from that one quibble, this is a pretty neat warband here.

I like the little detail that they won't fight unless they think it'll be worth their effort - very Slaaneshi of them!

[WarriorFish]

Thanks for the bits It's on the list as something that needs adding (as it feels so much is!), unfortunately I'm still in the process of collating all the existing snippets - once that is done I can begin with sticking them together and fleshing it out. Arguably this is the real meat of writing the article but time is a little short currently so I'm lagging behind on getting to it For the moment I'm prioritising getting enough to complete the first phase of the LASC (hence the final piece of the puzzle in the emblem). Once that is done I'll have more room to breath

 

They take the new name in reflection of the victory won against Eldar (or maybe more the looted soul stones), but I've not given it a great deal of thought yet as to the finer details other than it being a convenient way to make a clean break from their recent "tactical withdrawal" from their home world. So they certainly haven't forgotten their loyal incarnation it's more of a rebranding which is common enough for renegade chapters? Plus a convenient way of distancing themselves from their loyalist ways (when it suits, naturally).

[Ace Debonair]

Sounds good.

 

I just thought with the Swords being so prideful that they'd make a really big deal out of changing their name and symbolically shedding their old ways. They were the absolute best Chapter (according to themselves), so of course them renouncing the Imperium and their own past and embracing Slaanesh and a new, more fitting identity would be a momentous occasion.

 

I'm looking forward to seeing the Sundering Call develop when time allows and all the snippets come together!

[WarriorFish]

Indeed! As one of the more pivotal events (along with the initial meet and greet with Slaanesh) it needs some real attention to get right and give the detail it deserves, however that likely means that I'll inevitably put it off as I go for the lower hanging fruit.... Points for honesty? I have the basic idea for these as alluded to so far, but some ideas floating around are far from a completed piece! Perhaps just as well otherwise we wouldn't have the Liber

[Ace Debonair]

Indeed! As one of the more pivotal events (along with the initial meet and greet with Slaanesh) it needs some real attention to get right and give the detail it deserves, however that likely means that I'll inevitably put it off as I go for the lower hanging fruit.... Points for honesty? I have the basic idea for these as alluded to so far, but some ideas floating around are far from a completed piece! Perhaps just as well otherwise we wouldn't have the Liber

There's no rush, you've easily got enough detail for the LASC in the article now.

I'm also not one to criticise others about how long it takes to do these things properly - the White Hawks have basically taken me ten years to get even approximately right. 

 

In any case, I'm definitely looking forward to seeing more details emerge on the Swords' transition to the Sundering Call when the time comes, whenever it may be!

[WarriorFish]

I've added the sword proper, I will likely tweak it in time but the entire article falls under that category Figured I may as well tick off the requirements for the LASC now, there's still a lot I want to rework and improve upon but I'm thinking that some time off later in the year will be a good time to give this some more attention I'll see if I can find some time and inspiration before them too of course, but no promises!