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  1. Before I go any further, INP, thade if this topic is inappropriate please let me know, or lock it as applicable. Okay, as some may know, I write a few stories in the Librarium's Short stories section and would like some feedback from the members of this sub forum if possible on an SoB story. I'm currently writing a story that covers the origins of my DIY Order, The order of the Dauntless Spirit, and would like to know if it conveys in any accuracy, a Convent and it's Sisters accurately. The story itself is mainly about one Sister Saffron Sera who eventually becomes the Founder and first Canoness of this order. The Convent in question is a small branch of the main order, the Order of the Valorous Heart. Whilst I have read as much as I can about the various Orders of Sisters and know that there are a few Black Library stories with Sisters in (I've only read Daemonifuge), I'd like to know whether what I'm writing is any good. I have had feedback from other members of the board (although I haven't had any for a while ), but who else better than to ask those who are true aficionado's? I'd appreciate any opinions that you might have. I don't have a problem with critical comments, after all, how else is one to improve otherwise? For those who are interested the link for the story is here: A Valorous Heart, a Dauntless Spirit Thank you in advance
  2. “Wotz all dis, den?!” asked Gubnutz. “Dis,” Kaptin Badrukk, leader of the Flash Gitz replied nonchalantly, “Iz a rekrutment drive.” Below, about a dozen boyz were prodded into the back of Badrukk’s personal transport, Da Jolly Ork. Most of them looked sheepish. A few had tried to protest and got smacked about a bit. “Rekrutin’?” Gubnutz echoed. “Wotz dat den?” Badrukk snorted warily and leant on a barrel of Grotberg XXXXXXXX and reminded himself that his lieutenant wasn’t Da smartest Boy in Da Waagh! “Itz...itz a call to Da Jolly Ork!” he continued. “Itz callin’ owt ta eny Ork dat wantz ta join me Krew!” “Callin’...” Gubnutz strained his considerable ears. “I can't ‘ear nuffin boss! ‘Sides, I ‘member dem boyz. Dem got drunk on squig jooz larst nite an’ passed owt!” “Yeah...az I sed,” Badrukk said with a toothy grin as he looked at a large, empty,bottle of Squiggoth tranquiliser. “Rekruitin’.” Hello and welcome to something I’ve wanted to do for nearly 30 years! ^_^ Reminded of Ork armies of old, I thought it time I got it out of my system. This army will be fairly small in points and some models will be put to use as a Kill Team too. I also have an idea for a “Kustom” model, mostly due to a conversation to fellow Mod, Vel’Cona. That won’t be for a while yet, but I’m long forward to it ^_^ I have a metal Badrukk, who is primed and due to get painted very soon, but I wanted to focus more on other models in the army. Here are two for now. Gubnutz http://bolterandchainsword.com/uploads/gallery/album_5089/med_gallery_51296_5089_91866.png “’E ain’t Da clevverist Boy of da Krew, but I dun’ need ‘im to be. ‘E duz wot ‘e’s tole an’ ‘e’s loyal. Dat meenz summat at leest. I noe wen Da Waagh! Kikz off, I dun need ta worrie ‘bout me ‘oard a teef! Last Ork wot wuz me bodyguard tried ta steel it all! ‘Course ‘e’s still wiv uz. ‘Iz ‘ead iz on Da prow ov me Wagon!” Gubnutz was just a Boy with a small Klan of Badmoons when bad luck resulted in him being left behind. Scrapping a meagre living following the Waagh! Gudmoon, he chanced upon a meeting between the aforementioned Waagh! Leader and Badrukk. Stowing away underneath Badrukk’s personal wagon, he slowly worked his way into the Krew. Badrukk’s former second, an Ork known only as Squigsplitter tried to take control of both the spoils of war and his Krew. Gubnutz took an explosive round for the Kaptin, allowing Badrukk the opportunity to stomp on a rebellion before it even began. Knowing the lowly Ork could have let things go another way, Badrukk saw the loyalty shown by Gubnutz and promoted him to be his new bodyguard. Gubnutz takes his role as personal dogs body and bodyguard extremely seriously, something the wily Kaptin has taken advantage of more than a few times. But when it comes to it, Badrukk knows that he won’t turn on him, something rare amongst the cut throats he has surrounded himself with. His squad of Boyz, affectionately known as Da Meet sheeld have a similar fervour when protecting Da Bozz. Nothing gets close to Badrukk whilst they’re around. Da Mitey Werlitza http://bolterandchainsword.com/uploads/gallery/album_5089/med_gallery_51296_5089_1402227.png “’Ee mite be a Snot, but ‘e ‘az the hart ov a rippa squig. I know dat, cos da lil git nicked it off me!” An ammo runt of no small renown and one who serves Badrukk himself. Not only has he survived at least “many” Waagh!s, he instinctively knows when to get out of harm’s way. Most of the Boys and Badrukk himself keep a weather eye on where he is at all times. Also, for a Snot, he has quite the backbone, more times than not, standing his ground with his boss. Armed with a crude blunderbus, he makes every attempt to hit something, despite not being able to hit a barn door at point blank range whilst inside the barn. Thanks for looking!
  3. In the gloom of the Chapel, Magnar Tytus, Captain of Fourth Company stood impassive before a small group of giants. Even standing above them on a dais, he could see by how much they dwarfed even the biggest of the Chapters' Veterans. He bid them kneel. They did so and were attended by Chapter serfs. Each was given a Mark of Asseveration. A holy writ that bound them to their forthcoming mission. Bare headed, the Primaris Marines looked a little bemused by how much a scrap of paper adorning their armour meant. They would learn. Standing, they were given leave. Escorted by the same Chapter serfs, they went to the awaiting Thunderhawk. Tytus watched them go, and shook his head sadly. The Primarch had returned. That was news which ignited the remnants of the Marines Errant. Word of new Marines to help rebuild their Chapter was even more welcome. But now, he had reservations. This new breed of Marine was very impressive, but he knew what that meant. The old ways would die out, unless these new recruits embraced them. "Brother-Captain." Tytus turned to face the voice. "Chaplain Monfor. How goes the indoctrination?" "As well as can be expected. Whilst they are an improvement on His work" he continued cautiously, "They are from a time much different from the present. It will take time to fully integrate them to our ways." "I hope so." It's been a while since I've painted anything. Last year in fact. My vow in ETL was fallen spectacularly, my other projects have stalled for now. But this project has taken my attention and hopefully will bring me around to the others again soon. So, a Kill Team. I've been making lists on Battlscribe, watching others plan and execute theirs and I finally get enough gumption to make a start on this one. I have a number of others planned (Xenos, for the most part), but I wanted an Imperial one to begin with. Sisters are out until next year, so my mind wandered. Looking through Lexicanum one day, I eventually went looking at Loyalist Chapters and remembered Marines Errant. I've loved this Chapter since Rogue Trader times. I've tried half scheme Chapters before, but my hand was never steady enough to pull it off. My effort shown below isn't exactly the best, the lateness of the day I decided to start on it hasn't helped. I do have a decent light to use, but it was packed up when my painting mojo fell to zero. I'll dig it out soon. Definitely need to get better at free hand too :lol: http://bolterandchainsword.com/uploads/gallery/album_5089/med_gallery_51296_5089_205926.jpg I don't have any other pictures right now, my phone deciding to not take a decent picture. It's gotten me started painting again though. Thanks for looking! ^_^ Edit: It missed off a bit of text...
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